In A Profound State Of Not-Okayness

 

Yes, I am admitting freely that I'm in a profound State of Not-Okayness and I Needed to confess it on the Ole' Blog, so you'd know whattsup with me and the direction many of these Posts have been going, which can be pretty Dark and Emotionally Raw in an Angry Outburst of Angst at times.  *Le Sigh*  I definitely have not been all Rainbows, Glitter, Buttercups and Unicorn Farts lately, so it shows up in my Blogging especially.  Even if, in Real Life, if someone does the meaningless Social Courtesy of asking how I'm doing, I Lie and say Fine.  Or elaborately Sarcastically Lie and respond, Living The Dream... which, they may not realize it's Sarcasm and a Satirical Response usually.  But, it's not like you're gonna elaborate in most obligatorily Polite Social Settings the Truth, that wouldn't be appropriate to dump your Emotional Baggage out right there and then.  *Bwahahahaha*  There is a Time and a Place, this be the Time, this be the Place, at least for Yours Truly.

  

Oh Sure, I can adeptly Distract myself by focusing on what's Pretty or Sparkles.  I've resorted recently to taking a Deep Dive down the Pinterest Rabbit Hole, forgetting how Rich in Eye Candy it is.  Now some are Sharing AI Enhanced Imagery, but, overall it's the Real Deal being Shared that actual Human Beings have actually Created, and not some Artificial Intelligence generated slop.  But I won't Go Off on my strong distaste and dislike or AI.  I just know that all the folks in upper echelons of it are realizing they've already lost Control of it now and have concerns, but you can't put Pandora back into the Box.   And even Ole' Elon, the Ketamine King, is saying, ooops, we're gonna Need a Universal Basic Income for Real People when it eliminates so many of their means of Employment and Income, or we won't have any Consumers if nobody has a Job and Income to spend. 

 It acts as a Financial Floor to reduce Poverty, increase Economic Stability, and combat Unemployment driven by Automation.  It's been Debated for Centuries actually.  Personally, I'm All In with it since the drawbacks are fewer IMO and the benefits outweigh any concerns I'd have, since a Guaranteed Income they suggest isn't that much Money per Household to de-incentivize Working.   My Guy, Andrew Yang, is a proponent, and I was part of the Yang Gang during Kamala's Election Cycle, he'd of made a good President IMO, but I don't think America would have been any more on board for the 1st Brilliant competent Asian Male Prez than they were for the 1st Brilliant competent Black Female or even any Female Prez, no matter how accomplished and good for the Country they would have been.  Compared to what we have, that could have easily been avoided... just sayin'. 

 We didn't have to go thru all of this at all, but American Biases and Intentional Ignorance chose what they did.  And so now here we are.  And it's why so many of us are in a profound State of Not-Okayness now.  And so many of our Young People see no Future for themselves, so I highly Suspect a great many of them are in an even more profound State of Not-Okayness.   And they ARE the Future, so, we should be concerned that at least a couple of Generations of them, mostly they're not Okay as a Collective now.   I got Two Generations of them totally dependent upon The Man and I, or they're fucked, and that's never happened to previous Generations of my Family.   Every Generation has done better than the Generation before it, up until now.   And we're definitely almost out of Time and at End of Life, so I do have concerns for our Young People when the Safety Net Generation in front of them is just all Gone now.

I got a hard working couple of Generations behind me in this Familia that have a good Work Ethic and higher than average Intelligence, yet, they realize how the American Dream has evaporated for their Generations.  How a lot of the Archaic Barriers are being throw back up for Minorities, Women, the LGBTQ+ Community, and those with Disabilities.  Ageism is back to being Fashionable again too, so if you're Aging, and we all ARE, you're screwed by 40 now as well, if you find yourself replaced by either Younger Employees or Automation and AI.  The Son is close to panic about how few Job Opportunities there are when he has such a good Resume to draw from.   To the point he's desperate enuf for any Work now that he'll take the Minimum Wage Part Time Dollar Store Job IF they will even Hire him?!   So far, no Luck and he sits around depressed over it, coz he's Worked since he was a Tweenager.  And he Hates to be a drain or burden on us.

Some of his Peers, who've also found themselves out of Work thru no Fault of their own, especially those in The Trades, are trying to do Start Up Small Businesses and just work for themselves.   But right now Small Businesses are hit hard and struggling, even if they were doing well before Tariffs and the Fuckery going on in the White House.   The Banks know it's Bad and Interest Rates are high, too high.   And if anyone thinks the New Fed Chair appointed by this Prez won't be a Sock Puppet, they're delusional, he will be.   The one currently being considered can't even say out loud anything he imagines might piss off Ole Donnie Two Dolls, so he's being so vague and evasive when going thru his Confirmation Hearings that he's already looking slippery and slimy.  If you think the Chair of the Federal Reserve should have fealty to any Party or Prez, you'd be Wrong and I'd strongly Debate why that is not a Good Thing.

I don't have a Need to be Right regarding that matter, I just know I AM Right concerning that.   And how disastrous it could be if the Wrong Person is put in that Position who is a Sock Puppet to this Corrupt Madman who Financially Destroys everything he's ever Touched.  And so long as it enriches him and his, he really doesn't Care... on to the next thing to Financially Destroy for his own Gain has been his Track Record all of his Adult Life.   I do Hope he gets removed before his term is up becoz I don't know America can last under the whole term with that Mentally unstable Maniac in charge.  But, he's really more a Symptom of what's gone haywire in America than the whole problem, no One Person is the whole problem of America's rapid devolvement.  It's too easy to blame him for it all and we shouldn't be that naive, there's a Host of Bad Actors responsible, he's just the Talking Head of the Snake.

Anyway, on to Personal Drama, Princess T is Sick Today, allergies are particularly bad and she's having trouble Breathing, which isn't conducive to Working.  So, she had to call in and hopes Attendance isn't an Issue again?   They've previously let a lot of Good Employees go due to Attendance Issues, for legitimate Sickness and Family Emergencies or Crisis that the person cannot help.  One excellent Worker, Madison, got Fired for missing too many days due to her Mother Dying of Cancer!!!  She was a conscientious and Beloved Employee who'd been there for Years and worked her way up into a higher position, didn't matter, her Dying Mother was the Bridge Too Far for the Company, she'd missed too many days taking her Mom to Treatments coz her Dad couldn't Drive, he had Traumatic Brain Injury due to a near fatal Car Accident that same Year!!!  That poor Girl, only in her Twenties, was going thru it.  Being Fired and now having no Income, had to be almost enuf to Break her I'd think!!!

 

These are the kinds of things that American Families are suffering thru tho' and mostly, Employers have zero compassion for any of it.  Too bad, Sucks to be you.  And this is primarily why a lot of folks no longer feel any Loyalties to their Employer either.  They know they're dispensable and their Work Performance hardly matters, coz if they have one Personal Health Issue or Crisis, they could still be canned no matter how much of an asset they've been to their Company or how many Years of Service they've given them.  It's also why we have a Recruitment Problem in our Military, and most don't make a Career of it anymore. Benefits are eroded or have been taken away over the Years, and a Draft ain't gonna Solve that Problem.  It has just caused resentment now of the Draft Aged Males in this Country that they were Promised no more Foreign Wars.  And now the same Guy who Promised that and Dodged the Draft Five Times, started a needless War and is re-implementing the Draft in December... how Rich and Tone Deaf is that!!!???

The Elite have never had to involuntarily send their Kids or Grandkids to War, but the regular Americans have always had to make the Sacrifices for Country.  I think the regular Americans are fed up with Sacrificing for a System that no longer is working for them at all anymore.  I do Believe many who Voted someone like him in were willing to hold their Nose and just Hope he'd be different and implement a System that might work for them?   He was just an accomplished enuf Con Artist to make them Believe it and he was different alright... they had the naivety not to realize how Negatively different he would make the System and that it would work even less for them, and much more against them, and more for him, his Spawn, and his Elite obscenely Wealthy Cronies.  The Corruption now is unchecked and no balances or guardrails in place.  There won't be anything left by the time they are done.  Whatever regular Americans might have had for a Future, will be Gone.  Perhaps Forever Gone, we just don't know.

So, we gave Princess T a Breathing Treatment this Morning coz we've had Home Nebulizers since she was Born.  She used to need 5-7 Breathing Treatments daily as an Infant and Child, she outgrew a lot of the Medical Serious Frailty she was Born with.  But, from time to time she needs some Treatments, but no longer requires the constant Care of a Pulmonary Specialist, which, was a Success Story.  She's been a Soldier about chronic Illness tho', but it has caused missed School and now some missed Work, which both were blown up by School and Work as Issues regardless of her Medical History validating why she missed days legitimately.  They don't Care.  It Negatively impacted her in School and it Negatively impacts her at Work as well.  She's made to feel Bad for having Health Issues and Disabilities that are not within her Control.  Honestly, it's like both School and Employers would rather seem to have a Student or Employee who couldn't give a shit, but, just shows up every day to fill Space.   Than to have someone whose Serious about being there, Works hard, but has to miss a few days for chronic Illness.

But, it is what it just is, I can't Change what I have no Control over either.  So we just try to Work around the injustices in Society that are being tolerated, so, never seem to Change for the better and are therefore just accepted.  Or, progressively just get worse over Time becoz it's now acceptable.   She's to the place where she doesn't want to get Let Go, but, if she is too Sick to Work, and has to call in, she is gonna have to just hope she's been valuable enuf to be given some Grace and Mercies?  If not, well, she'll have to find somewhere else to Work then, she knows she's an Asset to any Employer and brings Value to whatever she does.  Your Reputation can precede you in Positive ways and grant you Favor, and Favor ain't Fair, but it is Favor.  I've always had Favor extended to me where ever I go and it tends to cover those that come along with me.

We're waiting on Wendell the Physical Therapist to arrive, he has to be on Time coz we have the VA directly after he leaves, that I have to get to, so that The Man can see his Primary Physician for important follow-up.  After that tho' the Day opens up for me and I may just go finish up some of that Environmental Cleanup at the Nature Preserve on that one Beach area of the River that was in really bad shape.  It was deeper into the Preserve so I'd never been able to get there with The Man in tow, but with the Grandson, we can do it, Si se puede.  *LOL*  You have to cross a shallow section of where the River splits to get to that Beach, but clearly lots of people have and didn't pack out empty what they brought in full, Lazy Bastards.  Lots of Beer Drinkers have been back there having quite the Par-tay and making a disgusting mess in a Beautiful Natural Setting that is on a Protected Nature Preserve.   We do what we can and try to get to the more obscure areas we know people have intruded into and left behind an Environmentally Unconscious mess that few, if any, will bother to ever clean up.   The County Paid Crews rarely get back that far.

We got about a Third of it last time, of just the Aluminum, and had to haul out large Bags full that were heavy.  Not many folks are gonna do that much Work as a Volunteer, or even if they're getting Paid actually.  I do pay attention when doing Volunteer Work at various Parks, at the Paid folks who are laid back, on their Phones mostly, or sitting around chatting coz there's no present Supervision, and not really putting in much effort to do the Job they are making a Living at.  I suppose some might be more conscientious than others, and we already discussed why many Employees anymore don't give a shit when they know they could just go above and beyond and have it account for nothing at all, so, they just don't.   I know if I worked for Park Services and got Paid, for what I'm doing for Free as a Volunteer, becoz I Care that much for the Recreational and Natural Spaces, that I'd be a very conscientious Employee just becoz it matters.  Even if it matter to few, it matters to me.  

But, I do enjoy doing it even tho' the only 'Payment' we get to offset our Labor, Transportation Costs and outlay for Industrial Strength Bags, is from the Recycle Proceeds for the Aluminum.  It's only at 70 Cents a Pound right now, it's been higher, but, it's been way lower too.  Unless it's at least at 70 Cents I just Hoard the Aluminum and don't turn it in until it's at a reasonable amount.  But we still do it or shit would sit out there for Decades mebbe, or end up in a Landfill instead.  I've actually found Aluminum Cans out in the Desert from the 1970's or earlier... it has sat out there not cleaned up for that long!!!   Think about that, how many Decades people may have passed by the Trash and not bothered to pick it up even if they didn't make the Littering.   And mebbe they never do, but tolerate it, coz they pretend like it doesn't matter enuf to just pick it up either!   Not MY Trash, I'm not getting Paid to pick it up, so, not my Problem is the general attitude.

You can definitely tell my general Malaise when I'm on an Epic Rant, can't ya?  *Bwahahahaha*   Sometimes Humans just piss me off, as a Collective and as a Species.   Not you all, of coarse, you Dear Readers are the exception.  And we're Wonderful.   *Winks and Laughs*   And I am further along in my Blog Reads now, so I'm mostly caught up on what all the rest of you Fav Bloggers have been up to and what you also might be Ranting about.  *Smiles*   I've even gone a few Posts into everyone's Post Archives to catch up more.   Some of you are prolific Bloggers too so I miss some and have to do a Marathon Read when I get around to it.  I bought a couple of my Fav Magazine Publications the other day "In Her Studio" and "Where Women Create", and can't Believe how much Magazines of good Quality now Cost, yowsah!!!  But, they are Keepers and not the throw away or Donate kind of Magazines, so, it's an Investment I never regret... Years of Inspiration within those Pages.  And even Reselling those Issues, you can get a Fair amount.

The Man's PT Appt. didn't go well, his BP was too low for Wendell to risk any Exercises and he suggested we go early to the VA and they'd probably see him early due to it.  Which, we did right away, an Hour earlier than his VA Appt. with his Primary and due to his Condition they got him in right away.  Dr. Klein adjusted some more of the Meds, as some of them he's taking for other things, can Negatively lower Blood Pressure too.  So, he's discontinued another Med and yet another I will moderate intake of depending on his Blood Pressure and Water Retention.  He's also ordering us a not-so-wide Wheelchair for the House, coz Today he was so light Headed that he needed to be Wheeled around rather than risk Walking and fainting.  So, that's how the Morning went, I'm glad to be back Home before 11:00 a.m. and call it a day with him.  Princess T still has a killer Headache, so she's still not feeling 100% either.

 

Since she'll be Home I may still go do Environmental Cleanup to reduce my Stress levels, which were high enuf earlier due to The Man's Health wavering between needing to go to the ER again or just Resting, so I had some Chest Pain of my own from the Stress/Anxiety.  Plus I had to lift him a lot coz he had no strength, and that's tiring to lift a 225+ Lb. Man.  I can do it but it's not easy, another Veteran did help me get him transferred from the Wheelchair into a Standing Position to use his Walker, coz he could see doing it alone was taking everything in me.  He was a Retired Marine too, and I appreciated him stepping up and helping, it took the Two of us to get him up and stabilized to get to the Truck after our Appointment was over and we'd scheduled his next Appointment and Labs for July.  He's doing better now he's Home and back to his Routine.

   

The Wheelchair will be Delivered to our Home and that will make it easier to get him around the House when he is having mobility issues.  I want to get his Medical Equipment ordered and available before he requires it all of the time.  We also put in an Order for the PT to be provided by the VA coz they provide more expanded Services to Veterans than the HUMANA Veteran's Plan does.  They may Approve 10 visits opposed to HUMANA Approving only 3.   And the PT's and Home Nurse also know more about Medications and what he can withstand in the way of Activity levels Safely than I can gauge.  I'm winging it really with just advice I'm given, which sometimes doesn't Modify enuf unless you have a Healthcare Professional seeing him more regularly to suggest a Modification a Doctor or Specialist can make if things are deteriorating or becoming concerning.  I know when I'm concerned and his PT and Nurse said I have a good Instinct about when it is Concerning, but, I don't necessarily know what I should be doing then?

He was doing better by Afternoon than he was this Morning, I was almost ready to head to the ER again with him and even Wendell said it was borderline whether we should whisk him off to ER, or to his Doc Appointment?   He took The Man's BP Three times and then said, let's just get him to the Doc early and let Dr. Klein decide, which is what we did.   Dr. Klein said the Heart is Weaker and that's why we need the Cardiac Rehab to strengthen it and the PT to strengthen his Muscles to keep his Mobility stable as well.   I just think at this juncture we're doing the best we can with a Heart that's wearing out and weakening.  That's scary to contemplate for me, I don't often think of his Mortality being close and I don't like to either, so push it out of Mind most of the time, tho' it is the Elephant in the Room, of coarse.   The Son and The Grandson said they'd do some Environmental Cleanup with me, we all Need to De-Stress some and Princess T will keep an Eye on Grandpa.  The Daughter hasn't been Home since Sunday Night.  She's gone more than here now... which is Okay.

We gleaned 21 lbs. of Aluminum off that Beach by the River.  I even found Two Pull Tabs Pop-Top Cans of Coke from the early 1970's, so they'd sat out there over 50 Years with nobody picking them up!!!  I told The Son and The Young Prince, this is why it's important that we do this.  We got "Barro's" Pizza on the way Home, paying for it with our Can Money.  We had a good time, it was Beautiful Outside and with the Three of us cleaning up it didn't take all that long.  We also found Six full Beers of various Brands, a full Bottled Water, some Tools, and some expensive Sunglasses people had left behind.   The Daughter had just gotten Home in time to have Pizza with us, she's being doing side Jobs for various people.  She's been cleaning House for a Friend whose Mother has Home Hospice and is Dying, so the Friend feels overwhelmed and needed Help setting up the Hospice at Home for her Mom.

I'm no Posts ahead now so have to try to wrap this one up so it Publishes Tomorrow.   I got it mixed up where The Young Prince is going this coming Weekend with the new Guy, it's Tucson, not up North of the State, but South of the State.  I guess this Guy hasn't visited his Family in Three Years, and had been Married before, to a Woman when he was Active Duty Military.   So, that explained a lot that I'd wondered, but without even asking the Questions to my Grandson.   So, I guess this Guy won't really Care what his Family thinks since they're not that close that it will matter.  He could probably go another Three Years without seeing them if they cause Drama or aren't accepting of who he is.  *LOL* That eased The Grandson's Mind too, since he wouldn't wanna cause Issues between anyone and their Loved Ones, he doesn't think it's worth it coz to him Family is Everything.  If someone causes Issues between him and Family, he really knows it won't last coz he's Close with us and our Relationships matter.

Allen keeps calling him and starting Drama, which, The Young Prince finally had gotten to the Place he's OVER the split and the Relationship, so he'd just want the Divorce to Finalize and both of them be Free to Move On without hostility or Drama.  He can't Block Allen from everything coz until that Divorce Paperwork arrives, nothing is finalized, and it seems Allen is dragging his Feet with it all.   Allen's Family had moved The Young Prince out here on their Dime in hopes it could be a clean split.  That's what our Grandson wanted too and tho' he did all he could to salvage the relationship, it had become unsafe for him and Allen's Family knew this Reality.  We wanted the best for both of them and like Allen's Family, I think they are trying hard to be Supportive of their Son/Grandson, while also seeing the other side, from our Family perspective of just wanting our Loved One Home and Safe again.  But, all the Family wanting something doesn't always translate to their Loved One abiding by it and I think Allen is going to be off and on problematic.

And it's not as if our Family put all the onus on him, our Grandson requires full time Extreme Caregiving, we had told Allen that this is a Lifetime Commitment since Serious Mental Illness can't be Cured and never really gets a whole lot better.   I think he had the best of Intentions, I don't doubt they were and perhaps are in Love, but, Allen cracked under the pressures of full time unpaid Caregiving coupled with trying to hold down a demanding Career and being the only Wage Earner.  He's Bipolar and Autistic himself, so he's already got a tough row to hoe of his own, with his Conditions.   So, I'm not vilifying him and our Grandson isn't either, he's just Tired of it not working out and dragging on becoz Allen doesn't want the responsibility anymore, but doesn't wanna just Let Go and Move On either.  Emotionally that's very hard for our Grandson coz he's Mentally so Fragile with the Schizophrenia and doesn't wanna Snap at Allen, but he's close to.  Last time that happened, it went badly for Allen.  One would think he'd Learn that's not Wise.

 

So, The Young Prince had a rough Morning due to Allen, I'd just gotten him out of his deep Funk Mentally, taking him to do that Environmental Cleanup, time with Family and Nature that was Pleasant and lifted his Mood and Mental State, and Pizza, when... Allen calls again and upset the whole Apple Cart, so to speak.  Dammit!!!   The Son was with us and he's looking at me and we're not saying anything, but I would concur that we both were Thinking the exact same thing at the exact same time... ruh roh, this is not gonna be Good, it's gotta be Allen calling... and we'll have to start all over again running Damage Control now behind that damned Call!!!  *Le Sigh*   Listen, I'd had my Final Come To Jesus with Allen when I kicked him out of our Home that infamous day he wound The Man up to the point that The Man took a swing at him depending me coz Allen had told him, your Wife is a Bitch.  *Bwahahaha... but you never tell a Man that directly about his Wife, even if it's True!!!  Winks*

And long time Readers know how that played out, coz The Grandsons were Living here with us, had even gotten Married here at our Home.  We were trying to work Allen into the Family even tho' a little bit of Allen can go a very long way.   He's a Good Guy, but his Autism is pretty profound so he has NO Filter, NONE, so you never know what will fall out of his Mouth that later he regrets coz it may be hurtful, offensive and definitely unfiltered first before he just blurts it out.   So, it took The Son and The Young Prince to hold their Dad/Grandpa back from going full on Postal with Allen, The Man has Dementia and TBI, he's 74 Years Old, he's Retired Special Forces, so he can hurt someone, even Kill someone.   He didn't need to get into a physical Fight with a Twenty-Something Year Old Corn Fed other Ex Special Forces Guy either.  Allen is Big, Strong, Corn Fed and Works in a Slaughterhouse all day long, he's a brute of a Guy.  It could have gone very Sideways for both of them.

Well, Allen had assumed, incorrectly, that I hadn't heard what he said about me, coz he didn't know I was in The RV Garage Mahal with the Big Door Open right in front of where their confrontation went Down!  Ruh Roh, now Dark Dawn came out of the Bag as I exited the RV Garage and headed straight for him.   Not becoz of what he called me, I've been called worse, rolls off my Back like Water on a Duck, but, he'd gotten confrontational with my Beloved, NOT Okay, never will be Okay, you Respect your Elders here or you're OUT on your Ass!   So, I rolled right on up to the Big Ole' Studmuffin and my whole Family are like, oh Shit, Allen really fucked up now!!!  I Calmly stood Toe to Toe with him and said something to the effect of, "I'm not a Bitch, I'm THE Bitch, and that will be Mrs. Bitch to you!!!   Now pack up your shit and get the Hell off our Property before I set it all on Fire!"   The Young Prince was behind him and said, "We must go, my Gramma means it, she might even light YOU on Fire!"   By then I had Allen Crying, yep, Grown Man in Tears, realizing he'd screwed the Pooch and now was Homeless again.

I did help them Pack up their Car and a Tow Trailer, didn't Care if they had to Live in the Car.  Felt Bad for my Grandson coz he hadn't gotten them kicked out, his Husband had.  Even took them both to Breakfast and put a new Tire on the Car coz it wouldn't have gotten them all the way to New Mexico otherwise, which is where they were then heading.  I just let Allen know, you're Welcome here until you make yourself NOT Welcome here and make the Mistake of not staying in your own Lane.  If you wanna step in my Waters Son, you best make sure you're a damned Strong Swimmer, and you found out the hard way you were in well over your Head.  Now, let this be a Lesson Learned.   So, I haven't actually seen Allen or talked to him much since, it's best if I don't coz he knows my Zero Tolerance Policy for Drama and a Headache, if you even Smell like either, I don't want you around, at all.  And he's Smelling like a lot of Drama and a Headache, but I try not to involve myself now that our Grandson is Home here Safe and wants that Divorce just Finalized.  He's Moved On already.

But, I understand... Divorces are never easy and rarely amicable.  It's how it just is.  Both Parties don't always Move On at the same speed or rate.  The Young Prince is a lot like me, once I'm Done with you, I'm completely Done and Over you, I Move On quickly and in Peace... and would prefer you do also.  If anyone can ever Walk Out of your Life, let them, they were never Tied to your Destiny then.   Anyway, so, I think this will be Messy for The Grandson and I told him that, so he knows he has to brace himself for Messy.  He tried Nice, and you can only be Nice until and unless someone makes the Choice for you NOT to be Nice anymore.  Allen is making that poor Choice and so be it.  He won't Like us NOT Nice, Trust and Believe.  Better to Play us Easy than to Play us Hard.  We always try to take the High Road and do Right by People first tho', so it's totally up to you how it will go for you then. 

Speaking of making Amends, on a lesser Note, The Daughter had used some of her Daughter, Princess T's, Body Scrub without Permission.  Well, turns out Princess T cannot replace it coz it was a Favorite Seasonal Scent they no longer make.  *Ruh Roh* And so she'd really gotten upset with her Mom about it, coz, let's face it, they're still getting used to one another since I Raised and Adopted The Granddaughter and she only met her Mom a few Years ago.   So, they're Building a Relationship and she doesn't know the Kiddo well enuf to know what is Taboo and you just don't do.  Using anything of hers without Permission, a Big No-No, and it's not respectful.  However, Princess T has left it in our Bathroom Shower coz she knows I never used her stuff... but, now her Mom is also using our Shower and thought it was a Body Scrub I bought and is Communal Body Scrub, coz I Share everything.  Old Hippies just do, it's our way, and as long as you're considerate by not Bogarting it all, Losing it, ruining it, or permanently absconding with it, I'm Chill with use of anything I've Bought and is mine.

So, it was a mix-up and misunderstanding more than an intentional offense.   But, the Grandchild was still upset and said she shouldn't have to hide everything to ensure her Mom doesn't use it all, and came to me to Mediate the infraction, coz, I'm "The Enforcer" around here.  *Winks*  Okay, so I had to have a Come To Jesus with The Daughter about the damned Body Scrub and why it's a Big Deal and got the Kiddo so Upset and Angry.  It was expensive too, The Good Stuff, Twenty something Bucks a Pot of it.  *Oy Vey*   So, anyway, to smooth things over I highly suggested she just give her Kiddo the Money to reimburse her at least, and then Buy something really fucking Special as a Peace Offering, so, she did that and bought some adorable Slippers that smoothed over the whole Incident.  *Whew*   Did you give her back what was left of her Fav Body Scrub tho', that she can't get anymore?   

Answer:  "Oh No, Mom, it was so Good I just used it ALL, coz there wasn't a whole lot left and you said it can't be had anymore."  *Christ on a Bike... but, she is Seriously Mentally Ill and Good Judgment has never been a particular Strength ever... so, whaddya gonna do?*  It's why she couldn't Raise her Five Children and they know this unfortunate Fact.  Anyway, Princess T is very Forgiving and I made her Mom Promise, no more using something until you ask Whose it is, coz if it's mine you can use it, if it's hers you must get Permission First... or not even put her on the Spot by Asking.  Coz chances are she'll not have the Heart to tell you No, but then complain to me later that she really doesn't want you Asking to use her Stuff.  *LOL and Winks*  You see, coz The Daughter is so Child Like, her Kiddos almost treat her more like a Disabled Sibling than a Mother... one that irritates them at times coz they know the Behaviors are permanent and not Manageable mostly.  So, it becomes that Sibling Rivalry for me to sort out.  "Mom did this... could YOU Talk to her Gramma?!"  *Bwahahahahaha*

Since she doesn't want her Kiddos mad at her, she does want to make amends when she screws up, which, is often.  And I've told her, how long it takes them to Forgive you is not within my Control, so, try to not fuck up, Okay, so that you can have a functional Relationship with them?  I know it's hard for them, having a Seriously Mentally Ill Parent is never easy for any Child... been there, done that... it's a Lifelong Journey to navigate and can be very complicated.   And neither of them had to Deal with her for almost 20 Years, so, they know I've Dealt with her longer and can Finesse a lot of the complex Issues regarding her, which, are permanent... and tho' not an Excuse, certainly is an Explanation.  Crazy People just be doin' Crazy Shit, it's that Simplistic, but in a very Complex way Relationally.  *Bwahahahahaha*

*******

Blessings, Love and Light from the Arizona Desert... where, Being in a profound State of Not-Okayness... isn't so hard when you know a lot of other folks aren't Okay either... we're all in this Together ... Dawn... The Bohemian