Se La Vie

 While awaiting taking The Man to his 1st Cardiac Rehab where he's going to be beginning his Regimen, I got everything else done here at Home.  I had intended to price some Merch to take in but only got One Cookbook Priced.  *LOL*  I don't really have sufficient Space to cram much more in there, so will spend all my time foofing the Spaces and making new fresher looking Vignettes of what's already in there.  I did that whole Vignette of Fiesta Ware which gave the Showroom a more Summery Vibe.  I do have a lot of Work to do in there to refresh things and give it a Visual Boost I can be Proud of.  It's a good Showroom but sometimes it gets neglected when I'm overwhelmed by Caregiving and everything else on the Calendar that has to have a Priority.  What I Need to do is swap out some Stale Merch with Fresh Merch... giving the whole Room a New Look and Boosting Sales.

I may mark down a lot of Inventory to move it faster while I'm in there Today.  A Sale always Stimulates Trade when you have Deals and Markdowns.  Stuff that languished a bit flies out of there then and the Quick Turn is what I'm all about since I'm there mostly to Downsize my Possessions from Home and do something we enjoy doing Together, The Granddaughter and I.   LATER:  I did end up Pricing and bringing in a shitload of those Mini Food Toys that the Kids Love and usually come in Blind Bags.  So, I Sell a lot of those since mine are in Clear Plastic Bags so the Kids can see what they're getting and they LOVE Collecting those and using them for their Dolls and pretend little Stores.  Adults who make Doll Dioramas Love them too.  Perfect for Barbies Dollhouses and other Miniatures folks like to Collect.

His Cardiac Rehab went very well, tho' the Lady that runs it kinda annoyed me coz she'd told me to bring his Doc's Printout I'm given from the Hospital of all his Prescription Meds, so, I did.  But when she saw it was 3 Pages long she said that was way too complicated {Ya Think!  Eye Roll} and she now wants a condensed 1 Page easier for her version that she expects ME to make her Job easier!  That must be fucking Nice, coz they sure don't do that for us Caregivers!!!  So now I have Homework to try to condense his Laundry List of Meds into a 'Handy' convenient One Page {subject to change without notice coz they change his fucking Meds all the time}, for her Job to be easier than mine with him!  Splendid, I'll get right to that Task.  *Insert Resting Bitch Face*  Like I Need One more thing to do to make someone else's Life or Job easier!

He was having trouble taking his Blood Sugars, he has to bring his Test Kit with him each time, and becoz she was making my fucking Job harder, rather than help him, I told him she'd help him with that.  *Winks, Paybacks are a MF*  Turns out he'd brought the Wrong Test Strips and why those were in his Case, who knows?  We don't use those ones so where he got them is a complete Mystery to me and I took them away afterwards and gave him the ones that should be in his Kit!  The ones he had aren't even for any Machine we've ever used for Testing!!!  Anyway, glad his first Rehab went so well that he won't mind going back.  But, I almost Lost him already while Parking the Truck!!!

You can drop Disabled Patients off at the Entrance, then go Park in Special Parking Area they had designated for Cardiac Rehab Patients only.  He was supposed to come into the Hospital and wait for me by the Elevator, coz Cardiac Rehab Patients don't have to Check In at the Front Desk.   Well, he went down the Wrong Hallway to some other Elevators and Luckily when I came in the Front Desk Lady remembered seeing him when I described him as a White Bearded Veteran wearing a Red USMC Shirt and with a Walker.  *Whew*  He went that-a-way and she points down a completely different Hallway of the Hospital where he'd actually had his Heart Surgery!!!  He'd never have gotten to the 5th Floor Cardiac Rehab from there!!!  And we'd of had to put a Silver Alert out on his Ass... if we couldn't locate him.  *Whew*  So, I'll have to take him up there each and every time to make sure he arrives.

They told me at the Front Desk I can do that without checking in since he's a Wander Risk and I'm not staying, but need to get him there safely and checked in with the Team doing his Rehab.  They'll be the only Break from him I get, so it's almost like an Hour of Free Adult Daycare for me and I'm rather looking forward to 34 more Hours of that.  *Winks*  So, no, I'm not sticking around.  *Ha ha ha*  I see a lot of Old Men in there without their Wives, it's predominantly Old Men in Cardiac Rehab, just a scant few Old Women... and some of those Old Dudes look like they're in really Bad Shape and not long for this World.  Their pallor is like a Corpse already, it's frightening, they could do a Zombie Apocalypse Movie as an Extra and not need Makeup.  I'm not being Mean Spirited, they look that Ghastly and like The Walking Dead!!!  So I Feel Good and encouraged that The Man looks way better than that!  My Brother too in spite of his Poor Heart Function of 20% and having a 'Mass' growing inside his Heart. *Whew*

My Brother's 'Mass' is inoperable and he's not a candidate for a Heart Transplant, he'd Die before he got near the top of any Donor List.  Plus, he has too many Terminal Comorbidities going on and wouldn't Survive that kind of Surgery.  The last Surgery he had they told him he only had a 5% Survival Rate and he went ahead and had them do it anyway.  He said if he Dies in a Surgery, at least he won't know and will go Peacefully and under Anesthesia.  He came out of it and his Docs were pleasantly Surprised, his Nickname has been Lazarus for a long time now.  *Winks*  Seriously, my Brother has been on Life Support Eleven times and had to have the plug pulled and then didn't Die!!!   His Lady, Marcie, says, do you know how hard that is to make that agonizing decision that many times for to let someone Go that you Love Dearly, and Pull their Plug, and then... they DON'T DIE?!  *LOL*  He has a huge Grim Reaper with DNR Tattooed across his Chest for the Paramedics, too.  *Smiles* My Brother is heavily Tatted and knows a lot of the Famous Cali Tattoo Artists who do his Work.

Princess T ordered a new Hoodie, Above are the Graphics of it... LOVE it... she's got a Wry totally Inappropriate Twisted sense of Humor like all the rest of us.  *Winks*  I've had a hard time staying Awake again Today by early Afternoon, I barely woke up in time to get the Granddaughter from Work when she got off.  Usually she gets off early on a Tuesday coz they go in an Hour earlier, but Today she had to work more than an Hour over instead, so didn't get off until 4:00.  It is Senior Day so I got a large Pioneer Woman Cast Iron Turquoise Enamel coated Dutch Oven shaped like a Pumpkin, so Darling!  I guess it comes in White and Orange too but is usually Sold Out Online and was more than 3x what I paid for it at SAVERS.  I got another Cookbook, like I Need another... ha ha ha... and like I even Cook... LOL.  And I got a 50 Count of Swiffer Sweeper Heavy Duty Pads 1/3 off the Retail Cost, never Opened.

Above is me, my Mom and The Young Prince back when she was in the Fancy Nursing Home here in Arizona.  I got her into the best one we couldn't afford coz I knew folks who Worked there and Medicare would only pay for 21 Days at a time, so it was such an Ordeal to Hospitalize her at the 22 Day Mark, so her Room would be Held.  Then put her back in for another 21 Days, until my Brother could pull Favors in Cali to move her out there into a Nice Nursing Home and then eventually to their Hospice Ward, which was very Nice too and even had a Victory Garden Outside of it that grew Fresh Produce that the Residents had in their Meals.  Mom really liked it there coz my Brother had taken great Care to pick it out.  She had been resistant to going into one here even tho' I had her in a real Exclusive one.  It was so Nice I wanted to move in to it!  *Bwahahaha*  She was Friends there with an Oil Baron Resident who was so Wealthy he had Fresh Salmon flown in from Alaska when he had a hankering for Fish!  THAT Demographic was in that Facility.

Anyway, it's always difficult when someone requires Long Term Care coz average folk can never afford it.  So I don't see that in my Future at all.  *LOL*   Moving On... coz I try not to think about the necessity of Long Term Care too much.   Coz The Man probably requires it now really, but even the Old Veterans Home won't take him and refused him back when he had TBI, so it's not an option.  He should qualify based on his Service Record and extent of Service Related Disability being at 100%, but back when he just had the TBI the VA Social Workers, all Three of them the VA Assigned us, told me that he required too much Care... which, I thought that's what every Resident required and why their Families can't take Care of them, Right?  *Eye Roll*  My Friend Margaret, from Church, who was our Pastor's Older Sister, had her Husband at the VA Nursing Home and was being charged $200 a Day way back over a Decade ago.  Her extended Family pitched in to help her afford it for him coz she was too ill herself to Care for him and he had End Stage Dementia.   I had always assumed it was Free to Veterans, but, I guess not.

When I Googled Why Not, it said that the 1st 21 Days are Free, very similar to Medicare Criteria for Skilled Nursing Facilities, went thru that with both my Parents.  But then, depending on Qualifying Factors, starting on Day 22 the Daily Out-Of-Pocket Copay is usually $97 a Day... but not always, since prices range and vary heavily by State, so could be $50-$220+ per Day!   And why Arizona's was likely $200 Daily for Margaret's Co-Pay?!  Every Veteran in every State should have an equal Earned Benefit IMO... in a Perfect World I guess they would... nuff said.   Private Civilian ones charge around $376 Daily tho', which makes that not remotely an Option either.  Eventually we had to make my Mom a Ward of the State of California so that her Care was covered.  We'd Sold Off literally everything we could, but it wasn't sustainable even tho' at the time I still had a solid Corporate Career, I couldn't even afford it then.  You gotta be on the Hurry Up And Die Plan if you're not Wealthy.

*******

Se la Vie... Dawn... The Bohemian

I'm No Domestic Goddess

 I'm 15 Unpublished Posts ahead now, with shortening them, that's a new Record for me.  And Crazy... but, you know... consider the Source. *LOL and Winks*  I could be gone for a Fortnite now and you'd never know.  *Smiles and Winks*   The Grandson and my Brother got in touch with me to see if I have more results or information, I don't yet, I didn't mean to make them anxious, but I have unintentionally.  Everyone here needed to know for obvious reasons, but then I didn't want Family not here feeling like they were omitted and left out of the Loop of knowing.  So I'd rather they hear it from me and when the rest of the Family know.

  My Brother is still Dealing with all his Bad Health News, he's just more used to it than me, he takes it in his stride, no matter how grim and ominous, and it always has been for him.  He's got Specialists that literally now tell him they don't even know why he's still Alive, it baffles them, coz he shouldn't be.  *LOL*  He just fully lives in the Moment and enjoys whatever Life he has left.  The way he sees it now, he's Outlived so many Expiration Dates they've given him for Decades now, that he just doesn't Care to have them give him yet another one.  I think he has the Right attitude and outlook.

I had wanted to talk to him longer but The Man was interrupting our Call and needing Attention for the new Wound he has no idea how he got.  My Brother could tell it was competing for my Attention, and it would be futile for me to explain I was on a Call to him and expect any compliance by The Man that it could wait.  His Owie would still be there on his damned Foot and how the Hell he got it would still be as much a Mystery.  I just Hope it Heals and doesn't require Medical intervention and Home Care or it will disrupt his other Treatment Plan for Cardiac Rehab, which will be lengthy as it is, just like last time he ended up with Wound Care taking the Priority until it finally Healed.  *Le Sigh*

The Son asked how in Hell his Dad had injured himself Twice in one Day when he hasn't done anything or gone anywhere to have had an injury?!  And we keep him closely monitored and Safe, yet the moment you aren't Eyes On him, now he's got hurt somehow!!!  It's been minor but it can become major, so you can't ignore even a small thing.   I can't even begin to speculate or say, HOW it happens, I have No Words.  And so it goes with The Man all of the time lately.  This is even on the Top of his Foot, about the size of a Dime, no idea how he did that?!  He had Socks on all day and said he got it when he took his Socks off but doesn't know how?  I didn't see it before he had his Socks on tho'.

We can't keep his Toenails trimmed enuf either, they're growing like Weeds, The Daughter gives him Pedicures but the VA want us bringing him to their Podiatrist for Care.  It's just a long way to go and difficult to get in on an Appointment, almost more Trouble than it's worth... just to get his Toenails clipped.   And one time he pretended to take a Shower, put Socks on so I couldn't see he still had dirty Feet coz he hadn't actually gotten in to the Shower I ran for him!!!  So when we got to the VA Podiatrist I was horrified to see that when they took his Socks off, his Feet were filthy from walking Barefoot around the House!

Both Docs told me they'd seen worse, so there must be some really filthy dirty Footed Veterans, coz they could see how upset I got with him.  He confessed he'd only pretended to take a Shower coz he really didn't WANT to take one!!!  Who fucking does that?!   And then he said it was coz he had JUST had one already, so he didn't want me making him take another one!  Which, he hadn't, and I told the Docs that with the Dementia and TBI, sometimes now he either makes things up, or actually thinks and Believes he just did something that he hasn't done, or hasn't done in a longer period of time.  They said they realize that and Self Care, or even Caregivers providing Care, becomes compromised due to it.  They Fight you and everything becomes a running Battle.

I choose my Battles wisely, but personal hygiene, being safe and sanitary, is a big one to me, you must practice it whether you want to or not.   And for those with Cognitive Decline, Brain Damage, or some forms of Serious Mental Illness, they don't WANT to and will Resist any efforts to make them or coax them into doing it with consistency.  If they didn't have a vigilant Caregiver I swear they would rarely, if ever, practice decent hygiene, safety, or sanitary living.  Battling over it with them can be a constant and they get very defensive and contrary about it.  The Man right now doesn't want his Hair or Beard cut, so he looks practically Homeless and unkempt all the time.  Coz he doesn't wanna Comb either one, so it always looks like he just Invented something.  *Eye Roll*   It is his Hair and Beard.

Even changing Clothing can be challenging and he won't voluntarily do it. Coz he wants to wear the same items over and over again, and swears he did JUST Change and they are clean and changed and not what he already had on.  Tho' we all can see that's not True.   So I have to Spirit them away when he takes them off.  Oh, and insist he wear something different to Bed, or I swear he'd even Sleep in the same things he wore all Day for Days on End if you let him... and replace them with something Fresh and Clean.  He gets Mad too about it, you'd think you were making an unreasonable request that isn't for his own good.  I'm more delicate about Finessing it, Princess T will just flat out tell him, Grandpa, you smell Bad, go take a Shower, Change, and Freshen Up!  You Smell "Old" and you're making a Room Smell "Old"!  *LOL*

Becoz she's so blunt about it, he is perhaps feeling a bit of Shame and complying, but mostly, I don't think he truly Cares?   We're always just One Question away, on an Eval Questionairre, from them saying they have to send him to Psyche due to his Answers, rather than just addressing the Medical Issues.  And sometimes I think mebbe they should, but I'd be worried about his Safety and Care in a Ward for those with Serious Cognitive Decline.  As well as the Safety of everyone else if he felt he was being held Prisoner and against his Will, so had PTSD Episodes really bad then, thinking he was a POW or they were trying to Kill him and he had to Escape or Neutralize a Threat.  They know my concerns and don't want that Liability and Risk either.  His Records do mention what he was Trained for.

Anyway, Today will be in Real Time, his 1st actual Day of Cardiac Rehab and I'll bring him up there but leave and see how that goes for him?  I've got to ensure he GETS there and doesn't get disoriented or lost in the Hospital, but, I'm not staying for his whole Regimen, they call you when they need pickup.  I'll be right across the Parking Lot at our Antique Mall working on our Spaces there, so, it's very convenience and serves dual Purpose for me and for him.  So, his 35 Cardiac Rehab Visits means I'll get a lot done at the Showroom and Locked Case at the Antique Mall and be in there more than I have in ages.  Well, until and unless my Medical Issues Sideline me, still waiting on Results of what I'll be going thru???  Our Calendar will be Crazy tho', for the whole Summer at the very least.  *Ugh*

I already got the Granddaughter to Work and I smell Coffee brewing so The Son is up and I've got to get him to Work before I take The Man to his Cardiac Rehab.  It was all staggered fine, her at 6:00 a.m., The Son at 8:00 a.m. and The Man's Cardiac Rehab at 9:30 a.m..  We have to try to coordinate shit constantly like that tho' and sometimes it's not as smoothly transitioned.  And if I get sidelined to where I can't Drive, it's Chaos then coz nobody else is Licensed!  The Two Schizophrenics can Drive but aren't Legally allowed to due to extent of Disabling Factors.  But The Daughter would do it in an Emergency and just risk being sent to Mental Health Court again.  *LOL*  The Son's Autism, unlike Dustin Hoffman's Character in "Rain Man", isn't severe enuf he cannot drive, and is Licensed, but has Restrictions right now so he doesn't wanna violate any of that, nor do I.  And Princess T doesn't know how to Drive yet.

The Man is very Anxious about his Rehab, so he's already up and crashing around with his Walker like he's in a Demolition Derby, so it's good everyone is already Awake or at Work or he'd be Waking everyone up!  He's got The News on loudly coz he's got very damaged Hearing from his Military Service, too much time as a Sniper in the Marines and even longer working around Jets in the Air Force trashed his Hearing.  Plus, he's 74, so Hearing would have been bound to go by now anyway and he's too stubborn to wear Hearing Aids, I don't think he WANTS to be able to Hear what we're saying to him?!!!!!  Or anyone else for that matter!? *Bwahahahaha*

The Daughter is up cooking everyone Breakfast using the Steak Leftovers from her Brother's Birthday Bash at the Restaurant, making Steak and Egg Burritos out of some of it.   She's a very good Cook and I enjoy being Cooked for.  The Man used to be the one who prepared excellent Meals but after his TBI he couldn't be alone in a Kitchen due to Safety Issues and forgot how to do just about everything, I miss his Cooking.  I have never been a Culinary Jedi in spite of my Dad being a Master Chef and my Younger Brother inheriting that Gene, it skipped right over me.  *Le Sigh*  I Admire anyone who has the skillset tho' and enjoys Cooking.  I just don't like preparing Meals and am not good at it, and I'm no Domestic Goddess either.  Nor do I wanna be.  *Winks*

 I had Great Earning Potential, The Man used to say, coz I always made more Money than him at our Careers.  And he was Cool with that.  *Bwahahahaha*  Believe me, some Men aren't, if their Wives or Girlfriends are more Successful at Earning than them, some Guys do not like it at all and feel somehow threatened by it.  So Dating was always Challenging that way for me, coz I was a Corporate Executive of Major Financial Institutions since I was 23 Years Old and my Star kept Rising after that.  One of my Young Female Friends at the DA's Office was a Superior Court Judge and Black, so she said that it was very Challenging for her Dating once they knew her Career and Position.  So, she was Single and I do Wonder if she ever did find Mr. Right?  She is still a Judge and her surname has never changed.  Beautiful and Wonderful Personality, Super Smart and Successful, she's the Whole Package tho'.

*******

Blessings, Love and Light from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

Food P*rn Galore And Something To Celebrate

 

So, we're back from The Son's 40th Birthday Bash Buffet at "Crab 99".  We ordered a Feast and got the Free Pound of Shrimp Boil we'd Won last Visit, you can get it in any flavor and we chose the Butter Garlic, Sublime and the Shrimp are Huge and meaty, we got them Headless and Deveined, which is also your Option at no Cost.   The Son and I both ordered the Fried Catfish Basket which comes with Cajun Fries and Seven Pieces of Catfish.  The Man ordered Fried Scallops and Clam Chowder.   Princess T ordered the Steak.  The Daughter ordered the Korean BBQ Ribs.  And we got the Two Flavors of Buffalo Wings they have on Special for the World Cup Celebrations.  We have a tonnage of Leftovers.  The Daughter got a Tequila Sunrise and The Son got a Bloody Mary... The Man, Princess T and I got Sodas.  Our Spin on the way out Princess T did for us and Won us another Pound of Shrimp Boil for the next Visit!!!  Yay!!!  Loved the Pix taken Above of The Son and his Sister, they're both gonna use it as their new FB Profile Pix.

 

Initially Princess T was gonna Opt Out coz she's not feeling too good, she has a lot of Stomach Issues and had spent all day in Bed 'til almost Noon.  But, she relented and came along, tho' couldn't eat much due to her Gut Issues, plus, she's a very picky Eater and so her Mom and Uncle will likely have her leftovers later.  It's Okay, she chipped in for the Tab, insisting she wanted to help me pay for it as her Gift to her Uncle, which was Sweet.  For as much as we got, plus what was generously Comped that we'd Won, the Tab was very reasonable tho', much less than I expected, even with a generous Tip for our Sweet Young Waitress.  The Kiddos tell me their Bartender makes a mean Cocktail too, well worth the price, knows what they're doing and doesn't Cheap Out on the Alcohol content like some places do.   They play good Trendy Music that the Kiddos all liked too and said they Wished their Employers Played that Soundtrack at Work.

So, it went off really well, a good time was had by all, everyone was in a Positive Uplifted Mood, I'm glad we could do something together for his Birthday, as that had been his only Desire and Request.   He said it's so difficult for him to get any of his Friends together to do anything anymore.  Everyone has their Schedules, Families, and Obligations, so they seldom get together for anything, even if advance notice is given to make room for whatever it is.   And since The Son is Childless and Single, he has more Freedom than any of his Friends who have Wives, Husbands, Kids or even Dating someone Seriously.  And I have found that Married Couples or Dating Couples do Socialize differently than Single Adults, Divorcees or Widowed Adults.  So he's in that Limbo of being practically the only one his Age now whose unattached and not looking to get attached either.   The Daughter has more Single Friends so her Socializing is quite different.  Quite a few of her Friends have Kids, mostly Grown now, and have never been Married and don't intend to be.

Before we'd left for the Restaurant The Man had some Bleeding on his Left Leg, didn't know how he'd done it, I checked to make sure his Skin wasn't splitting open again, it wasn't.  He'd dinged himself somehow and didn't feel it.  Then, we get Home, I'm talking to my Brother in Cali on the Phone and The Man interrupts me again and shows me his Foot, and now he's got a Wound on his Left fucking Foot and doesn't know how he got it!!!   He's like a Small Child now, getting hurt all the damned time doing Lord knows what, and then coming to show me his Owie!  Which, he Needs to, coz we have to treat it Seriously even if it's a small Wound, he's an Insulin Dependent Diabetic.  And coz he doesn't Heal worth a shit and that's why he required Home Help in the first place, which, now we don't have anymore so he can get on with Cardiac Rehab.  Christ on a Bike!!!  

 It is one thing after another with him and it gets exhaustive to keep him semi-healthy and not having some kind of Medical Crisis perpetually now!!!  I can't go do anything coz I almost always get interrupted with a Call from Home that it's something else with him now!  It's why the Kiddos all get nervous being a fill-in Caregiver coz they don't want something going sideways with him on their Watch, I completely understand and they wouldn't know what to do.  But, I do require the respites and to be able to go do Shopping or Errands without him in tow coz taking this Show on the Road is a challenge logistically and Medically now too.  We've got Medical Equipment, even getting his Shoes on now is an Ordeal.  I've got Three different Shoe Sizes we have to try on to get a Pair that fit coz his Feet swell, un-swell, and some days he's less ambulatory than other days.  Plus, he can interrupt you constantly when you're on a Phone Call or finally trying to unwind and relax... like RIGHT NOW!  *Le Sigh and an Eye Roll*

He's crashed in here with his Walker now Three fucking times in less than 15 Minutes!!!   First to show me his Owie.  Then to ask me to help him with Band-aide application after the Wound was cleaned. {He can do it himself and I try to make him do what he can still do for himself or he'd not do a damned thing for himself now.}  And then to "Show me his Socks????", Yes, Honey, they're your Socks, why are you Showing me your Socks?   Just go put them on to protect your Feet more.  I guess he couldn't remember why he was holding a Pair of Socks, or to prove to me he had Socks to put on?  I really don't fucking know?!  *Eye Roll*  Instead of just Chillin' in his Media Chair in the Livingroom and watching his Shows after having had that Nice Meal Out Celebrating The Son's Birthday!!!  Finally, I'm like, Honey, I'm trying to Unwind and Relax here, so I'd like to have some Quiet Time, Okay.   Other times he doesn't want anyone to be around him all day, and gets agitated and annoyed that you are.  So, you just never know the level of Attention he's requiring nor expecting?

But I've done Irrigation damage control when we had problems with it this Morning, taken The Son to Work after that, Medicated The Man and got him his Breakfast with The Daughter's Help, done some Yard Work and Housekeeping, did some Environmental Cleanup, did the Birthday Thing.  All without a Nap Today, so now I just require a little bit of Time to myself, coz it's only 3:00 p.m. and I'm Tired already and still not Feeling 100% myself.   Until I am 100% I'm trying to make him aware that I can't be going at a breakneck pace 24-7 and 365 now, and it's not all about him all of the time.   I'm on Doc's Orders to take it easier 'til they know what's going on with my own Health, so I'm not too worn out should I require Surgery or some other Medical intervention that might be necessary where you Need your Strength.  I can't be depleted Physically, Emotionally or Mentally right now, so he can't be demanding so much that I don't have in me to Give right now.   The Kids are reminding him that Mom/Gramma Needs to catch a Break, so, Behave.

He was pretty good all Morning, but, after 2:00 p.m. you really Need to have him just Home and Settled in coz the Sundowners starts and he begins to Act Up, predictably now.   He either gets Childish and becomes a Nuisance for the Attention, or he gets Agitated and Angry over Nothing and making much ado about Nothing.  Just your very Existence could then bother him.  *Bwahahahahaha*  I will sometimes tell him, when he gets ridiculously Mad at one of the Kiddos over Nothing at all, coz they haven't done a damned thing, Hey, Knock it Off, you're being Unlovely and they're just Breathing... you KNOW they have to Breathe... so, Lighten Up!!!  *Bwahahahaha*   The Kids get a Kick out of it and sometimes I'll use the Levity of Satire and tell them Sternly, will you just stop Breathing, it's Annoying your Father/Grandpa!!!  *LMAOROTF*  Then he'll Settle Down and Lighten Up when confronted with how ridiculous and Silly he's being over Nothing.  

Coz I will sometimes counter with, if he's being a real difficult Pain in the Ass towards the Family... Listen, I could GIVE you Something to really be Upset about, do you want me to DO THAT?!  *Winks, No, NO, he most def does NOT! Smiles*   And the Kids will Giggle and quietly Whisper, Mom/Gramma, STOP it!  *Bwahahahaha*   Hey, don't Threaten me with a Good Time, I could quit being Long Suffering and come completely out of the Bag on your Ass... you choose which Dawn you're getting!?  I start out every Single Day with Dawn Of The Light being Dominant, it's better for everyone concerned that you don't Invite Dark Dawn out to Play and switch to the Dominant side of me you'll then get and will not Like.  *Winks*   So don't ruin a perfectly Great Day for yourself and risk the consequences of Testing me.  I have never professed to be a Mentally Well Woman.  *Smiles and Winks*  I Love him with all of my Heart and Soul, but a little bit of him lately can go a long fucking way!  *LOL*

The Son was Joking with his Dad recently when he could see his Dad was being really difficult and Testing me, and I was starting to reach my End of Patience, Endurance, and Loving Kindness with him.  He's saying, "Dad, you don't wanna end up in Hand to Hand Combat with Mom do ya, that's not the Hill you wanna Die on, Man.  Not after Surviving so many Theaters of War in Combat after 39 Years, it would be tragic to Lose you like that!  If she goes on the Warpath and Full On Geronimo!"   And then we all started Laughing, coz, hey, that's hyperbolic and Funny, I don't Care who you are!!!  *Smiles*   The Kiddos have all said I often get my "Geronimo Face" and "Crazy Eyes"... they're pretty sure that would have been my Indian Tribal Nickname, "Crazy Eyes".  *Bwahahahaha*  Either that or "Postal Yet Calm".  *Winks*

Geronimo 1886, Chiricahua Apache Bedonkohe Band, may he R.I.P.

My Dad right around Circa 1976 or Before, may he R.I.P.

My Cousin D.A., may he R.I.P., in Traditional Tribal Attire, he too was in the Marines in Vietnam, his Dad {My Dad's Oldest Brother} also Served {See my Uncle Below}

My Uncle Dwight, may he R.I.P.

Now, tho' my Dad was almost always Smiling, coz he was a very Pleasant and Agreeable Man, tho' one of few Words, his Eyes could Chill you to the Bone in spite of a Smile.  If you were to Cross him or be Stupid and Foolish about how you Behaved in his Presence, no matter who you were, he only Need give you a Look, it was always Enough.  He never would show Anger visibly, or Fear ever, he didn't Need to, he'd just give you a Look and if you were Acting Up, it was a pretty good Time to then Wise Up, Straighten Up, Lighten Up, and just not GO there... it was Unspoken and no Words were ever Needed.   I think I developed or inherited that Trait from him, coz if I am getting Angry I will rarely visibly Show it and will be steely Calm in fact.  The Calmer I am the Angrier I probably am getting.   And I certainly won't use Words if you've taken me there.  But the Eyes will definitely convey that I'm not Playing either, and my Family have often told me that's what Scares People.  And I'm not even Trying to BE Scary.

Dad never had to discipline us, he'd snap his Fingers to get your Attention and just Look at you... even if he was deep in Conversation with someone else, that's all it ever took and he wouldn't even stop mid Sentence.   Never heard him Raise his Voice, disrupt his Calm, or lose Control.  I remember his G.I. Friends he Served in Vietnam with said when their Base got overrun sometimes, everyone would be in a Fearful Panic except for my Dad, who stayed completely Calm and very Strategic.  And becoz he was Food Service, Food Service and Clergy Positions didn't even carry a Weapon.   The Local Population of South Vietnamese Locals who Worked with the Americans greatly Respected him and many of them gave him expensive Friendship Gifts when his Tour of Duty was up, that cost them a Month's Wages!  Coz they felt that Highly of him and related to him so well, coz he wasn't like most Americans they had encountered.  I'm pretty sure most Indigenous American Servicemen were not like what anyone had encountered, and the same was said about my Native American Uncles and Cousins who Served in the Military.  They are still Fierce Warriors and not Afraid of a Fight.

So, anyway, after bothering me too many times after we got Home, and pushing his Luck, The Man finally Calmed Down and Stayed Put, since I told him I wasn't Feeling very Relaxed.  And that wouldn't End Well. *Winks*   I don't know what's going on with the U.S. Postal Service, tho' I do know this Administration is messing with all Federal Employees and gutting Agencies, so that could be responsible for the Post Office ineptitude to get Mail anywhere on time lately.  I sent a Bill in that the Clearinghouse is only in Los Angeles, we're in Phoenix, it took 20 Days to get there!!!   WTF?!  You could Walk to L.A. from Phoenix in 20 Days, and it ended up assessing me a Late Charge even tho' I sent the Bill in way before the Due Date and well before any Late Charge would be assessed.  I called the Creditor coz my July Statement was saying it was delinquent too and wasn't Crediting me the amount I knew I'd Paid and had Cleared my Bank, coz I checked to make sure before calling.  

That's when I found out it had taken so fucking long to get there.  I don't make Auto Payments coz you're Agreeing to Access to your Account and they could charge you anything they want with that permission structure.   I once had a Mortgage Company, Years ago take out Two Mortgage Payments instead of one becoz I had the Account on Auto Pay, so ever since then I refuse to allow Creditor Access to any of my Accounts, don't Trust them, know that they are fallible and can fuck up and cause you a load of problems getting any Administrative Errors corrected then or reversed if they duplicated a Charge.  That can throw your Budget all out of whack and our Budget is strained as it is in this shitty Economy this Regime has caused America unnecessarily while enriching themselves handsomely at our Expense.   So, anyway, at least I did get confirmation, Yes, they Credited the June Payment but after the new Statement generated.  

They weren't willing to waive the Late Charge of $29 even tho' I've never been late ever before, so they can see my Payment History is exemplary.  Most Companies don't appreciate your Business and Nickle and Dime Customers now, it's why I have no Company/Business Loyalty anymore either.   And of coarse it isn't their fault that the Post Office took over Two Weeks to get a Payment Mailed from Phoenix to L.A., it would have been a Customer Courtesy to Waive it, she wasn't willing to, tho', she was Polite Customer Service.  I don't think they give their Customer Call Center Reps much Authority to do anything anymore and you're probably not even speaking to an American in this Country.  She sounded like she was Filipina and didn't speak great English.  They Outsource everything Cheaply in other Countries they can pay even lower Wages to exploit an International Workforce, usually in some 3rd World disadvantaged Country.  

We also then had to calculate what my Minimum Payment would now be? Since they wanted more than double on the Statement, due to saying they never received a June Payment, which, they did actually receive.  I always send way more than any Minimum Payment anyway, coz I pay all Debts/Loans off early if there's no Prepayment Penalty assessed, but won't send Double or more.   I hate to have to spend time on Phone Calls every Month tho' due to some error not caused by me, and every Month it's something else lately.  You have to bypass the Bots, if you do finally get a Human, often they're Reading off a Script and don't have a good grasp on the English Language.  So, they may or may not even be able to Help you Solve whatever Problem you're calling about coz they know Zip about whatever Industry they're even in and got Hired for.  Most Loan Servicing is no longer done in America, it's all Outsourced and they have Zero Loan Servicing Knowledge, Experience or Education.  

I'm usually telling them how to do their Jobs coz I ran their types of Departments for Major Financial Institutions as a Bank Executive many Moons ago when we did it here and your Employees had to know the damned Business.   It's Crazy to me how unqualified and incompetent most people are now doing the Jobs they got Hired for.  And this Administration is some of the worst EVER at Nepo and Croney Hires, who have no Qualifications, Experience, Knowledge, Training, Credentials, or Education to be put in some of the highest and most crucial Positions of Government and risk our National Security coz they don't know what the Hell they're doing.   Not a Clue, but they have Fealty to this Prez, do whatever he says, regardless of how illegal, immoral, or damaging to the Country and the rest of the World, and that's the only thing he considers at all when choosing them.   And why we're having such absolute Fuckery and Chaos Nationally, everything getting fucked up and gutted... mass Firings of Qualified Employees and Career Public Servants and Military, who won't commit Illegal Criminal and Immoral Acts for him.

Anyway, The Son bought himself a Concert Ticket for Tuesday Night and his Ride backed out and didn't secure their Ticket, so now I have to take him and pick him up or he's out Fifty Bucks.  Most Concerts now worth going to aren't close by, but, it is what he wanted to do for himself for his Birthday so I'll oblige.  But I've told the whole Family, don't crowd out my Calendar with too much of your stuff coz I may have stuff of my own Medically to have to Pencil in there on Short Notice.   We just don't know yet and it won't be able to be ignored or not be a Priority.  Period.  This is what happens when everyone has a lot going on and no Transportation of their own.   As it is 35 Visits to Cardiac Rehab scheduled for The Man is a shitload of Commitment to just his Rehabilitation to be Calendared and set time aside for 'til it's Done.  And he's never Done.  He hasn't been Done for Decades with his Medical stuff, it's a Constant.  But, it has kept him Piping along, you just can't afford to get Sick or require Care of your own as his Caregiver tho'.  Whaddya gonna do?  It's why most Caregivers Drop Dead before who they're looking after... nobody is taking Care of us... and taking Care of Yourself when you're a Full Time Caregiver is easier Said than actually Done.

*******

Caregiver Burnout is constantly trying to be staved off and avoided... Dawn... The Bohemian

So, How Old Is Too Old?

 Irrigation had it's hitches this rotation, not just coz it came at like 3:30 in the Morning, but, coz I forgot to Wake Up and help The Daughter, she did her best doing it alone and in the pitch dark.  But, the debris floating downstream clogged up again at where our next door Neighbor Omar has his Ditch covered, so The Son had to Snake that before he went to Work coz it was flooding our Pasture.  But, the Front Yard where the Pump feeds Water on the East Side of the Front and the very Front where our Pine Trees are, didn't get enuf Water before The Daughter got Tired, unplugged the Pump and went to Bed to get some Sleep.  So, I had to turn it on again for 1.5 Hours to get enuf Water for that portion of the Property and the amount of Water we are supposed to take on so we don't Flood Neighbors downstream of us by not taking on all our Water assigned to us.  We did get it resolved tho' by 7:00 a.m..  *Whew*  It can sometimes get complicated depending upon what happens unexpectedly.

In Real Time it's The Son's 40th Birthday and a Monday, we'll be taking him out for a Birthday Luncheon at "Crab 99" after he gets off Work at Noon.  We have that Pound of Free Shrimp Won last time, we'll get a bucket of more of their dual flavor of Buffalo Wings... and then whatever each of the Family wants to order.  With his Birthday falling at EOM when we're most financially Tapped Out, it's all we can do for his Birthday as a Family.  But, he's okay with that.  His Midlife Crisis is easing up some as he wraps his Head around turning another Decade Older.  I think if things were going better for him it would have been a non-issue.  But, he lost his Career due to the Owner of the Company Dying and the Widow deciding to Sell it to an Asset Stripper and lay everyone off.  He's living with his Elderly Parents coz Rent isn't affordable.  He doesn't have an operational Vehicle and his License has some restrictions due to a DUI he got a few Years ago.  He's satisfying all the Court's Terms and didn't catch a Felony Charge at least. 

  But he's Single and not Dating right now coz he said who wants to Date a Guy whose 40 and has nothing to offer?  Plus, tho' he's liking his new Job and grateful to finally get one after a Six Month Unemployment Crisis coz nobody was really Hiring, it's only part time and minimum Wage at a Dollar Store, so, he's Underemployed.  That's the American dilemma for a lot of Working Folks right now, not Unemployment, but, Underemployment and yet nobody is Talking about it and they should be.  Americans shouldn't have to be taking on 2-3 Jobs to make a Livable Wage to afford just the Essentials, plus doing Gig Work on the Side too.  I see so many Working Folks the Ages of my Adult Children and Adult Grandchildren being Uber Drivers and Delivery Drivers just to get by.  I even see a fair amount of Seniors doing that or having to take on Minimum Wage Jobs to supplement a Fixed Income just to afford Essentials or their Medical Bills and Medications, they'll have to Work now 'til they Die.

I know our Ends barely meet now so I have to be Creative and Work my Hustle to ensure everything is Paid, on Time, and with something left over to enjoy Quality of Life and not just Exist barely.  You don't wanna run out of Money in your Old Age, but that's a distinct possibility for a lot of Seniors now, their Retirement isn't gonna sustain them if they Live too long and outlive the Retirement Income they set up for when they couldn't Work anymore or didn't want to and thought they'd get to Enjoy their Retirement Years and do stuff they had on their Bucket Lists.  To be sure, some folks are.  I know Retirees who are going on their 60th Cruise and take several a Year, Traveling the World in Style.  Their Health has held up and they either did well when they were Working, or, and, they have a Side Hustle that works out really well for them.  The Cruising Couple Breeds a Miniature Pedigree Breed of Dogs.   They seem to Breed their Dogs a lot, I feel somewhat conflicted about Dog Breeders doing it for maximum Profit, coz there's so many unwanted Dogs desperately needing Adoption at Shelters and being euthanized.

I don't know what Ethical Standards are used and enforced for Breeding Pets for Profit?  Thus I remain conflicted about the Practice... how often is too often to make a Dog produce Offspring if you're making a lot of Money off of it?  At what point is it a Puppy Mill?  They have a steady stream of Puppies they've bred and can charge Thousands per Pup for.  If you have the desired Trending Breeds of Pedigree Dog, it's very lucrative.  Folks will spend $5,000-$10,000+ for a single Puppy!!!  I know, that's insane to me, but if it's Elite Quality Lines of Dogs, and high demand, I guess you have that Client Base willing to shell out that much!  And I know the Cruising Couple gets about 5+ Pups per Litter and have more than One Breeding Female, so the Math adds up quick!!!  But I don't presume to know anything about Dog Breeding or the Ethics of it.

  They seem like Responsible folks and they are Vendors at our Antique Mall who Sell high Quality Merch, and she does Hair, he is an accomplished Silversmith and Sings in a C&W Band, so they've got their Side Hustles in Retirement going Strong and I wanna be them when I Grow Up.  *Bwahahahaha*   But, sans the Dog Breeding coz a part of me thinks it's marginally ethical, perhaps even unethical, to Breed any Animal that much just to Profit off of it.  We do it to Livestock for Food Sources, but for Pets, it just seems so unnecessary and a Production Line of Living Beings.  Many Streams of Income can have you living your Best Life, for sure.  Of coarse 60 Cruises to me sounds like an excess, but mebbe it's like Vegas where the Frequent Gamblers get Comped about as much as they wanna accept, from the Casinos that know they're Whales?

  Mebbe Cruise Lines do the same thing, with Loyalty and/or Casino Programs earning you Freebies and even Complimentary Trips, I dunno, never been on a single One.   And a lot of the Cruise Lines lately have had some major setbacks with Epidemics breaking out on Ship, serious accidents like people falling overboard, and equipment failures or fires on Ships, severe Weather damage, Wildlife Strike Investigations, Food Borne Illnesses, it makes the News a lot lately.  Even some Murders and Deaths of Passengers have happened, whether on Ship or at Ports visited and on Excursions.  Viking, Virgin and Crystal Cruise Lines have the best Safety, Personal Security and Cleanliness Records to date.   The Budget Lines have the worst Records... which, I guess you get what you pay for... and, some of the Lines that have 5,000+ Passengers I've heard can be chaotic, coz, that is just a lot of folks in one Space Sharing Services and keeping up with the demands of.  Most people I know who are Cruise Addicts having nothing but Good to say and Share about their Experiences tho'.

We did have other Birthdays this Month, this Great-Granddaughter who lives in Pittsburgh, turned Seven, my how Time Flies!   We've got Middle Aged Grandkids and Great-Grandkids now attaining a speeding maturity that I can't quite keep up with or keep tabs on.   I'd need a Spreadsheet to keep track of all the Birthdays now.   With the Great-Grandkids I don't know all their Birthdays, or even all their Names, until I'm reminded by the Grandkids, it was enuf to keep track of Grandkid's Birthdays and Names once you get a certain amount of them.  *LOL and Winks*  This one's Name I do remember coz it's unusual and I'd never heard it before, tho' perhaps it's popular for her Generation coming up?  Her Younger Sister got Named after a Dead Great-Great Grandmother, so has an Old Lady Name. 

 And Honestly, I felt really Bad saying to The Man, when that Great-Granddaughter was Born, Why did they give her such an Old Lady Name, Honey?  I haven't heard anyone with that Name under the Age of 80 or 90!!!  *Smiles & baffled*  Well, then when he said it was the recently departed Maternal side's Great-Great Grandma of the Newborn of the Granddaughter who just had said Child, I felt Guilty and Awful for saying what I did!  It was his Ex's Mother's Name, his previous MIL!  *Oooops!*  It is an Old Lady Name tho' and the Great-Grandchild whose named after the Departed Old Lady is only just Graduated from Kindergarten.  Of coarse I don't think any of her peers EVER will have that Name... that Name fell out of Popularity in the 1920-1930 Era!  And I'm not certain it was all that Popular even back then?!?  *Smiles*  Above is said Little One Carrying and Saddled with an Antique Name for Life.  It might make her Tough, who knows?  *Bwahahahaha*

The one that just turned Seven looks SO MUCH like our Oldest Daughter when she was this Age, that it's like she's been Cloned!!!   None of our Oldest Daughter's Three Girls looks this much like her, so it skipped a Generation and now she's got a Clone in this Grandchild.  *Smiles*  The one with the Old Lady Name looks exactly like our Granddaughter did at that Age tho', so she's her Mama's Clone.  Their Little Brother, whose the Youngest in the Family, looks more like his Oldest Sister.  Once The Granddaughter got The Son they wanted, she and Hubby shut the Baby Factory Down... so no more!  *Smiles*  They are Middle Aged tho' so it was the right time to, you don't wanna be still having Children as you near 40 or you'll be that Senior Citizen Aged Parent at the High School Graduation.  *Bwahahahaha*  

 And as Grandparents who were that Age and Raising a 2nd Generation of some of our Grandkids, it's not 'Natural' to be still Raising Kids when you get that Old and why Old Women are no longer Breeding.  Now, Old Men on the other hand...  *Huge Eye Roll*    But you better have that much Younger Trophy Wife bearing them for ya, coz an Aging Woman don't wanna be still having and Raising Children close to Menopause.  I was 28 when I had my Youngest, The Son, and I felt that was too damned Old and shut the Baby Factory Down!!!  *Ha ha ha and an Eye Roll*   And an appropriate Size of Family is highly subjective and can even be controversial one way or the other.  I've known people who choose to remain Childless getting pressured to have Kids... and people who have a very large Family be condemned for having too many.  And just coz you can have Kids doesn't mean you should, some folks aren't up to the Job of Parenting.  To me it's personal and none of my business how many Kids someone does or does not have.  So long as I'm not expected to Raise them... *Winks*

*******

And we may have a difference of Opinion, but, so, how Old is Too Old for some things my Friends?

Dawn... The Bohemian