Monday, September 25, 2017

Melrose Vintage



We're stepping away from the Darkness for awhile and going Light... perhaps we'll go back another time and finish our Dark Journey thru some Halloween Delights... but for now, I Need a little bit of Lightness.   MELROSE VINTAGE always provides that Light airy Vibe that definitely uplifts if you're not Dealing with the best of times or the best in people.  




I fell in Love with this Mermaid that Wendy had in the Shop, isn't she Divine!?!  She's a Prop, but regardless of NFS Status, I could envision Statuary like her Poolside... well, if I had a Pool that is.  *LOL*  I have a penchant for Garden Statuary anyway, eventually I'll get some Fabulous ones for Villa Boheme, probably of the Asian Zen Themed variety for the Garden and Courtyards.




I would like to own some Bella Notte Linens too... they are luxuriously decadent... and right now not within Budget, dammit!  *LOL*  And The Man prefers sturdy Cotton Sheets and Pillowcases and not anything ultra Femme on our Bed.   So for now at least, no Bella Notte, tho' I think I do have one Bella Notte Pillow I got on Sale at Wendy's a long time ago and is in the Pillow Hoard somewhere.  *Smiles*




I've been drained of Energy lately and still feel pretty much like Crap since eating is still quite a chore and the Med reactions, or side effects, have left me feeling just exhausted.   I see my Doctor soon and she needs to figure something else out, this is not working for me... at all... quality of life is circling the drain at this point and I want to rest or sleep almost all of the time.




I got some Crafting Supplies at the Shop this day and some back issues of a Fav Mag Jeanne d'Arc Living... and this Vintage Pennant from Talhlequah, which is where my Paternal side of the Family all pretty much live and are from.   So I hadda have it, been Missing my Mom and Dad so much lately... SO much!  I think when you really feel like Crap a longing for the tender touch of Mommy and Daddy always linger with you no matter how Mature you become.




Dad would have brewed me up some Tribal remedy of some sort and given some Sage Advice passed down thru the Generations... there's nobody left to do that anymore, it died out with the Elders.   As an Elder now myself I don't know that much of the Old Ways to make a significant difference.   Modern Generations became so arrogant of adopting The New Ways, didn't we?  So we Lost that precious Knowledge of our Ancestors... and hindsight is mos definitely 20-20.




Lately I've been relinquishing Cooking duties to The Young Prince, he's getting better at Cooking meals for us and really likes to.  It's rather Nice being Cooked for, I could definitely get used to that!  *LOL*   Caregivers rarely get pampered themselves so it feels like pampering.  He tries to make it as appealing as possible knowing eating is difficult for me now, and small manageable portions.  He doesn't get upset if I can't eat or have to leave a lot, not because of taste, but because of Health struggles.




We discuss it candidly, he and I, it's conversations I can't really have with The Man anymore on account of his brain damage, and his Sister is still too Young to discuss the Deep Topics with transparency.   To see him growing into this Deep Thinking and very Mature Young Man is heart warming, he is a very Compassionate Soul.  He handles his own serious Health and serious Mental Health Issues with Grace and fortitude.  He has an understanding of what it is like to Live with Chronic Health Issues with little or no relief, he's known no other way.




Usually we all, as a Family, want to attend the Halloween Event on Saturday, and I've always returned at least once more... this year I did not so coverage will be slight.  Mebbe one more Post if I got enough decent Images to Share... because I know you all Enjoy going over to The Dark Side with me.  *Smiles*  This year I knew I didn't have sufficient Energy for standing in lines and with popular Events there will be long ones.  Just Rest Gramma was the advice of The Force, we don't Care to go since you're not feeling Well.  It's Nice to have Supportive Family and Friends during difficult times.




Some people will show themselves not to be supportive nor positive during your difficult times, I'm at that Season of Life now where I just cut those folks loose, don't Need it.  I just don't have the precious Energy right now to Deal with unloveliness or Drama and my tolerance therefore is minuscule for any of it.  This has made me more intolerant than I Like to be, but in many ways I've been told that I tended to be TOO forgiving sometimes of bad behavior, so perhaps it's growth in a better direction for my OWN Well Being?




As The Young Prince said during one of our recent Deep discussions, well, Gramma, sometimes you're just TOO Nice and some people don't always appreciate it and think they can behave badly then and you'll just Forgive them and overlook it.  Which is True, I typically have... and there are some who will mistake Kindness for Weakness or take you for Granted.  Time I guess to drop the ballast of anyone choosing to be Unlovely, mean spirited, snarky or ornery that I don't HAVE to Deal with.  That's hard, some of those people I actually Like the person, but not the negative behaviors exhibited. 




I've been very introspective lately of what and who I don't HAVE to Deal with... since things and who I DO HAVE to Deal with are all consuming right now.  Sometimes you just have to make that conscious choice to drop ballast things and people... the jetsam and flotsam of Life... there's usually more of it than you realized actually to navigate Life through!!!   Sometimes it shows up unexpectedly... other times you knew full well what or who it was... regardless if it is a fresh revelation or an old one... it's going overboard now... it's not sailing on this Ship, we've got enough precious Cargo to carry.




And it's also why my Blog Posts have been scarcer, because in times of Deep introspection I haven't had the Desire to just Blog about everything going on or every Thought in my head I'm mulling over Privately.   Sometimes it's too transparent to go Public on any Social Media with Deep Topics.  I just know if I had any unkind opinions or jerks show up, I would likely then not be Lovely myself and I'm trying to stick with Positive Energies and Being Nice on Purpose.  I'm keeping Dark Dawn at bay and intentionally not having knee jerk reactions with peeps I'd rather just drop like a Rock if they initiate hostilities!!!  *Ha ha ha*  




Because as my Dear Ole' Nanna always said, and perhaps your Dear Ole' Nannas did too... Two Wrongs don't make a Right.

*******

Blessings and Love from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Sweet Salvage ~ Wicked Faire



I had really been Hopeful that by the time the SWEET SALVAGE "Wicked Faire" Event rolled around I'd be feeling better, especially since my Dear Friend Pamela would be joining me, but it wasn't to be.   She was a great sport about it and though we arrive an hour early to get good parking under a nice shady tree so I can sit in the truck comfortably, since I just can't stand long and in the hot Sun anymore in lines while on these dreadful meds and feeling like crap, she was Down for my limitations... that's a Good solid Friend right there!




So yeah, that also meant going to the back of the very long line and being some of the last thru the doors when they opened... since we didn't realize I'd actually Won the VIP Early Entrance Drawing to get her and I in 20 Minutes Early!!!  *Arghhhhh!*  Dammit, with these Aging Eyes I couldn't see the "See More" drop-down on my tiny Cell Phone Screen that would have scrolled down to reveal my name as the 5th Lucky Winner!!!   So I only saw the first three names and figured better Luck next time!  *Sob*




Okay so that is what SUCKED and put a definite damper and disappointment on the whole Experience for us for this show.  However, you know that when Pamela and I get together, nothing is going to derail us from having a Big Time and a ton of Laughs!   And as an added Bonus, I got to finally meet in person a long time Blog Friend, the very Talented Joyce Janes of MONTICELLO ANTIQUE MARKETPLACE, which totally Rocks too!  Meeting Blog Friends in person is always an Amazing Experience since we've gotten to know each other already in this Wonderful Community of The Land Of Blog.




And though we couldn't and therefore didn't stay long, on account of my crappy Health Issues draining my Energy so quickly lately, I did manage to pick up a couple of Delightful Fabric Pumpkins the very Talented Mary Rita Horn Created from African Mud Cloth and Vintage Batik materials.   I had thought them to be Kilim materials and was glad she clarified for me what these Lovely Textiles were and where they had come from since I really dig them.  This is the first one I Scored, Created from the African Mud Cloth.




As you can see it looks great at Villa Boheme in the entryway hall, I just Enjoy my Fabric Pumpkins so much they typically just stick around all year long and aren't just Seasonal Decor for me.   So I get a lot of mileage out of my Fabric Pumpkin Patch!  *Smiles*




I use them to also hold and Display some of my Bohemian Bling, so the Vintage Batik one that I Scored, pictured here, was Ideal for this Brooch with the Blue Stone.   I liked that these have the real Pumpkin Stems and some nice weight to them as the filler.




So leaving early, but with my two Lovely Fabric Pumpkins, made it all worthwhile.    This is one of the most Popular Themes so I knew it would get crowded very quickly and we'd have to bounce prematurely.  Hard to cover an Event anyway once too many shoppers arrive, but I think I got enough pixs to Share to give you the gist of how Amazing the Show was.   The Designers make this into the most Delightful of Autumn and Halloween Vibes you can possibly Imagine!!!




And tho' I got very few Panoramic shots, I did get some nice Close-Ups of my Favorite items and Vignettes as we meandered thru the Show.  If I pace myself I feel fairly good...




And just rest when I Need to... and the resting spots are Delightful too, plus when you're wearing your Lily Munster Tee how can you NOT have Joy, even if you're not feeling 100%, right!?!  *LOL*   My Friend Pamela also treated me to an incredible Lunch and didn't mind that I still have trouble eating and had to take 3/4 of it Home to the Family to finish off for me.   I do wish I could stimulate more appetite since I WANT to eat, but just can't without feeling dreadful and having internal backlash.  It's better than it was since I've reduced the crazy high Insulin levels the Doctor ordered... but eating is still a real chore.  I think that is why I feel weak all of the time now and wear out so easily?




And since our Arizona Sun can really sap your strength on a Good Day... on a Bad Day you really feel depleted so quickly that even a Good Time has to be paced considerably.   We were having a Good Time even tho' I wasn't having the Best Day Ever for sure... and I was so Glad that Pamela joined me so that I didn't feel down in the dumps about Health limitations impeding my Roll and what I can and cannot do anymore!  *Smiles*




Because it is Tempting, when you don't Feel Good, to just languish in Bed at Home and just not muster the Energy to do anything, no matter how much you'd looked forward to it.  I almost was at that juncture the Morning of the Event, but knowing I had a Friend waiting on me to pick her up and join me, motivated me to rally myself and go try to have a really Good Time.  I was so Glad I did because we indeed DID have a really Good Time and long overdue Girl's Day Out together!!!




Plus, covering all of the incredible Holiday Events all over the City buoys my Spirit considerably.  Since I have so many Uber Talented Friends in the Industry and really want to Support ALL of the Small Businesses that Serve our Wonderful Communities so that they each thrive and prosper to give the Consumer Fabulous Options beyond Big Box Corporations.   It is an Energizing Environment to enter a Fantasyscape that has been Created by the most Talented of Designers, Artisans and Stylists.




I think my Aesthetic might even be rubbing off a bit on my Friend Pamela, who is usually all Pastels and Glitter... but went over to the Dark Side with this Amazing Eyeball Necklace Created by our Friend Cyndie of VINTAGE ENVY!




So here's the hilarious scoop on how it happened... I'd seen Cyndie's FB Reveal of said Eyeball Necklace, cribbed here.   So I'd rushed over to Photograph it for the Blog Post... GONE... but since we'd gotten in so late I was not surprised and just bummed.   Til Cyndie tells me, "Well Pamela bought it!"   WHAAAAT!?!  MY Friend Pamela, who is Sweet and always walking in the Light?!???!?!   Well, that's just hilarious!!!    *Bwahahahaha!!!*




And she did and she Loves it... and I think coming over for a visit to the Dark Side will be such Fun for her!  *Winks*  And mebbe some Pastel and Glitter will rub off on me too... ya never know???  Well, yeah, probably not... LMAO... I tried to go Light once, didn't last... some of us have to stay over on the Dark Side... it's Home for us!  *Smiles*   And she let me photograph her Eyeball Necklace at Lunch... which could raise some Eyebrows around us, No??!  *Ha ha ha*




Especially since it was the very same Restaurant we'd once had that conversation about my Dead Deer Nose in the back seat of the Truck one day and almost made a Waiter Lose It with Laughter when he rolled up on that conversation!   Had he been our Waiter this day perhaps us Photographing an Eyeball Necklace wouldn't have Surprised nor phased him as much if he'd rolled up on that too... you know, now that he 'knows' us?!  *Winks*




You will be Surprised that I didn't buy any Creepy Dolls this time... mostly because how many do you NEED to Hoard up at Home, right?  *Winks*  And, I'm currently Selling Off some of my Creepy Doll Heads in my own Showroom... so it would have been a moot point to gather more.




I did desperately wanna buy Esmeralda The Gypsy Fortune Teller Mannequin my Friend Michelle had, but it was her Mom's and a Prop she really didn't want to part with and I can totally respect that.  Would have looked Awesome at Villa Boheme tho'... 




Even tho' as we speak my Hallway still looks something like this... only slightly Culled, since Mannequin Heads that aren't as Vintage as Esmeralda head off to my own Showroom and I should just Gypsify them all for Halloween to move them out the door quickly!  I go to Work Tonight and I just wonder how many can I make into Fortune Tellers in an assembly line of Mannequin Madness? *LOL*




So Scoring two Fabric Pumpkins was all I could manage this time around... and right now this is all the Blog Posting I can manage for the moment... tho' I will try to churn out some more coverage when I'm feeling a bit better.




*******

Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian







Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Pre-Posthumous Humor



Yes, the Post Title is indeed very Gilliamesque... but I haven't been feeling that Well, the Diabetes has been rather a bitch lately and I've felt like Death warmed over!  Finally I had to take myself off the insanely high increased doses they'd prescribed in their experimentation of what MIGHT work and go back to the reduced Insulin dose of before.   I HAD to, felt like they might be killing me and The Young Prince googled my extreme symptoms and determined I was definitely having Insulin overdose reactions.




  There... I'm getting my Medical Advice from a 17 year old Grandchild who probably has a higher IQ and definitely more sense than most Western Medical Docs I've seen!  *LOL*  Who don't really have 'answers' and play around with meds and doses like I'm some Guinea Pig... one trapped inside my own Body so we gotta just Make It Work as Tim Gunn would say!  Anyway, lowering the dose instantly worked and I can eat again... or even smell food without being horribly nauseous!  I also felt considerably better, tho' not completely better. *Whew*




At least my appetite returned to where I can feel like eating portions of a meal, tho' eating several times a day is still a stretch for me, even tho' I know I should.  I try to eat something Divine so that I'll WANT desperately to eat at least some of it, even tho' I can hardly ever eat all of it anymore.  One would think I'd drop lots of weight being unable to eat properly, I really haven't, which SUCKS!




I am Meditating more so that at least my Head Space will be in better shape than my physical body.   And I've been resting and sleeping a lot, fatigue has been a huge factor in this downward physical spiral I'd been free falling into.  And I can't afford the Luxury of being too tired... since Caregiving requires you to be alert, somewhat rested and getting what needs to be done... done!




At least there are some Events coming up that I'm looking forward to attending that will buoy the Spirit.   The Halloween and Autumn Events are my absolute Favorites that I look forward to all year, so Emotionally that is a definite Bonus to have them coming up.  Having our Home decked out for the Holidays early has been beneficial too.




Despite all of the crazy stuff going on in the World right now I think I'm doing Okay overall.  It's hard not to think about how much is happening that is not Positive in the World around us, but mostly I try to focus upon not engaging with Negativity if I can avoid it.  I only watch as much of the News on TV as I can Handle in any given day.




I Scored another piece of Old Wedgwood to go on the Dia de los Muertos Altar in Tribute to my Mom.  Clearly the Thrift Shop didn't know what it was since I got it for Ninety-Nine Cents and had another 20% Off with my Military Discount!  Antique Wedgwood tends to be in a darker Cobalt Blue Jasperware Dip as you can see the shade difference between this earlier Pen Tray and the later period Candlesticks. So it is likely 19th Century or even earlier.  I found the exact one online but no value noted.




Doesn't matter, I'm Keeping it for Future Altars Honoring the Spirit of departed Loved Ones.   And speaking of the departed, we had an Interesting unexpected conversation in the Truck on the way Home from The Young Prince's School.  He knows I haven't been feeling Well lately and began asking about the location of everything that pertains to my pre-paid Funeral arrangements... you know, just in case!  And then went on to say that he realizes with the Adoption of he and his Sister, now they are Heirs along with their Mom, Uncle and Aunt... so could he have all my Taxidermy when I die?  *Bwahahahahahaha!!!*




Gotta Love these Kiddos, no Topic is Off Limits with them, they will discuss the Morbid Issues of Life as freely and nonchalant as the most mundane of Topics! *LMAO*  I went along with it since such things should in fact be discussed at some point, he's likely to be the one who would have the presence of Mind to be handling my Affairs anyway once I cross over... so why not?  I don't know why but it's actually Funny to me to be discussing my final arrangements because it's just a Strange Topic to enter into really in a matter of fact and casual way. As if we're discussing somebody else and I'm talking about myself in the 3rd person, which is just Weird and hilarious to me!




I know Mom always liked to talk about hers, as if she was Planning some Awesome Trip... which I suppose it IS really... but it always struck me as Funny.  Now when discussing my own Mortality, if the subject just happens to randomly come up in conversation, mostly with The Force since they can be Morbid little buggers, it's still rather Amusing to me.  Because tho' we all know it's gonna happen to us all, I don't think about it all that much.  Tho' The Man and I made our final arrangements and paid them off many years ago so no Adult Kids or Grands would be burdened with it or the expenses.




I asked The Young Prince Why, do I look like I'm dying and is this why the Topic randomly came up?  He grinned and quipped, "Well, not every day..."  Nuff said!!!  *Bwahahahahahahaha!!!!!*   Then he went on to query as to his Obligations to raise his Little Sister in the Event something were to happen to me before she's grown... and what would he do with Grandpa?   I asked if all this was giving him undue Anxiety and he said only when I don't look so Good.  He wasn't Smiling this time, so I can see it weighs heavily upon him sometimes when I'm not doing so Good.




See... this IS something that Families with Loved Ones with profound Special Needs or who require Full Time Caregiving have to discuss eventually.  Or when Grandparents are raising Grandchildren and have to Last longer than usual to get the Job done!  We don't know yet whether The Young Prince will even be able to live independently and without some Caregiving due to his SMI condition?  And yet he realizes his Uncle also Deals with a lifetime Disability.  So it would be a stretch for his Uncle to take on the responsibility of everyone if I 'go' first.  He's pretty much intelligently determined he's next in line to inherit whoever is left!  He takes it very Seriously since he's a very Serious Child who Thinks deeply and profoundly for his Age.




His Mother called Today from Mexico... she had been robbed at gunpoint last week and had to give up her purse and cell phone, it traumatized her and sent her into a Mental Health downward spiral of Fixating upon the Thugs.  She knows this isn't good, she is Okay and not harmed from the robbery, she can replace Phone and Purse, but now she's Paranoid more than usual... and usually her Paranoia is high, so she's been rather on the Crazy Train and Aware of it.  




She said her Son hasn't been taking her Messages or Calls, I told her I knew he'd been avoiding her and Why.  He had thought she might not be Well right now and can't Handle it... she's Okay with that and suspected as much.  I told her he hasn't been doing so Well either sans Psyche Meds.  She said something quite profound about being at a place in her life now where she might seek Treatment again and try to get more stabilized, I'm Happy about that introspection, it's rare for her.  I'm guardedly optimistic she might seek Medical intervention when things get real bad now... but I'm more guarded than optimistic until it actually happens.




You can have epiphanies but the follow thru doesn't always happen after them.  I know this because it's happened with me as well and I suspect it can and does happen to any of us.   One epiphany The Young Prince and I had, even before his Mom's call Today, was that we're nixing the trip to Mexico after hearing of her being the victim of armed robbery.  She's extremely Street Smart and not an easy Mark, so if it happened to her it can happen to anyone.  She was Glad she didn't resist or go on The Crazy Train when it happened, since she heard the click of the pistol being cocked.  But it was a trigger to a serious Mental Health Episode she's still working thru.  Her Demons run Deep and it's a Lifelong struggle she suspects no Cure will become available for in her Lifetime.




 The Safety factor about Mexico, and especially now when Americans are getting targeted more due to the current Political Climate being so f---ed up, is something we don't have a Peace about.  She agreed, tho' it's been over nine long years since our last visit, she agreed it's not a good time to be an American in many parts of Mexico.  Hell, it's probably not a good time to be a Mexican in many parts of Mexico... and some other unstable parts of the World where violence and corruption are continuously escalating!   Not to mention several large 7 and 8 point Earthquakes as well!!!




I used to be quite the Global Nomad so really that bothers me that Foreign Travel anymore is something you really have to Think long and hard about nowadays.   Especially if you have a Family in tow... I want all of their Travel Experiences to be Memorable in only the best possible ways and not the worst!  "Mebbe we should think about just going to Hawaii rather than Mexico or Bora Bora Gramma", The Young Prince said Today.  




 Would you be too disappointed to ditch the Bora Bora Dream Vacay in favor of a Trip to Hawaii he wanted to know?   Nope... at this juncture and after filling out a tonnage of paperwork to try to obtain Passports, I don't think so... I think it would be just Fine!  *LOL*   Now that I have Adopted The Force at least Travel is possible without Approval from various Agencies, like when they were a Kinship Placement and I had virtually no Rights and was viewed merely as a Convenience to The System saving Money.




But still, I find myself not wanting to jump thru any more extraordinary Hoops anymore to be Approved for anything.  Our situation is still somewhat complex enough it is usually more than just a pain in the ass to try to convey.  As I was filling out the Passport requests I couldn't even remember the Birth Date of my Dad... long gone... and that Upset me tremendously that I had already Forgotten!  To be Fair my Dad rarely talked about his Birth or Childhood since it was traumatic and difficult.  So I didn't even know which State he'd even been born in until after his Death! 




But, forgetting important things is Upsetting to me all the same... it reminds me of my own Memory deterioration and it's frustrating to have Upsetting Senior Moments of things you feel you should never Forget!   When something very important and Cherished cannot even be recalled, well... you Wonder what else has gone by the wayside in forgotten Memory?!?  *LOL*   "It's probably the Diabetes...", The Young Prince offered as a semi Comforting explanation... tho' we both know it's probably only part of it.  Then we engaged in hilarious banter of Gallows Humor about what he'll have to do with me if I get any worse off... *Bwahahahahahaha!*




It involved a skit where he anonymously dumps me off at the most expensive Nursing Home we can't afford with my suitcase and telling me I'm Home!  And me playing along in a most hilarious demented way that would make Staff feel so bad they couldn't possibly turn me out or away.  We laughed our asses off all the way Home... from talks of my demise to pawning me off on a High End Nursing Home in one single ride Home from School... I know... we're sic like that!  *Winks*




*******

Blessings and Love from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

A life touched by God always ends in touching others. - Erwin McManus

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars. - Og Mandino (1923-1996)

For creativity to flourish one should try to look at everything as though it were being seen for the first or the last time. - Quote from "A Thousand Paths To Creativity" by David Baird

Is what I'm about to say an improvement on silence? ~ Galen Pearl