This Hospital called by Wednesday Afternoon to say they are releasing The Man to come Home Tonight, so The Son and I will be going to pick him up around 5:00-6:00 p.m.. He'll be glad to be Home again and so long as they got the Internal Bleed under control I am okay with him being released, since, laying around in a Hospital Bed just weakens him and makes him Emotionally depressed since nobody familiar is around him for long. We visit daily, but can't be there all of the time. Princess T has been Crying a lot about her Grandpa, so she wants him Home. Her Job understands how Emotionally Raw this is for her since we Raised her and she's so close to her Grandpa... she's his Princess. She hasn't been Coping well with his decline, which none of us have, but she's been the most visibly impacted by it. Our Mortality really is hard for her, since, she's the Youngest.
I got her to Laughing when she burst into a flood of Tears talking about Grandpa. Coz I said, Wow, you didn't erupt into a Flood of Tears like this when I took my Irrigation Senior Fall. You Laughed when I told you what happened and I was laying there floating like a Starfish! *Winks and LMAO* Coz then we both burst into Laughter, I can always get her to Laughing and regulate Mood with Gallow's Humor like that. She said she'd spent almost all day Crying at Work, worried about her Grandpa. Gabe, her Supervisor knew Why and was very compassionate about it, Gabe really likes The Man and I so always asks how he's doing, and how am I doing. He's a very sweet Young Man and we like him too. We like all the Young People who work there, they're a great bunch of Young Adults and know all of us Regulars by Name. I knew all of them before they even asked if our Granddaughter would come Work for them after she Graduated High School.
LATER: So, The Man is Home and eating some Homemade Caldo de Pollo and watching his Shows. We have all the follow-up info, some Nursing Home did give us some literature in case it's needed later on, seems to be a new place near the Hospital that offer In-House Rehab and Long Term Care, walking distance from the Hospital in fact. So, good to have that information for the Future. They had him hooked up to a lot of Escape Proof Technology in his Room, which The Son found to be Smile Worthy. You didn't manage to Escape this time Dad, he said, and The Man said, Yeah, but I Tried. *LOL* And his Head Daytime Nurse confirmed that Yes, Yes, he had, on several occasions. I'm sure he kept them busy, they had Alarms on his Bed, on his Chair, on him. They had a Self-Lock on his Door when it Closed and a Note on the front of it, so from the Inside he couldn't leave and alerted Visitors that with the Door Closed, they'd have to ask to be let out. *Smiles*
Now he's Home he's Fine, he's never tried to Escape from Home and follows his Safety Prompts pretty Religiously. I'm like a Drill Sargent about that. I've told him the 1st time I have to put a Silver Alert out on his Ass, he's gonna be Dealing with Dark Dawn from then on. *Winks* He likes being around his Family and wants to remain at Home anyway, so he has incentive to not try that shit to where we couldn't ensure his Safety or adequate Care. Someone is always here with him so when he Needs anything he has a Loved One that can address the Need without having to wait, like you might have to in Assisted Living or Long Term Care where Staff are looking after several Residents. I think they're setting him back up with Home Oxygen, which should help with the confusion of insufficient Oxygen or further Blood Loss. He did have Stomach Bleeds, as it turns out. Could be from all the Meds he has to take and Stress of his declining Health, could be causing Ulcers.
We're getting Amazon Prime Cable for Free right now so I was watching some Comedy Specials, not New ones, but ones I'd never seen before from 2016 and just before the Pandemic ones with Lewis Black, hilariously funny. I like his Comedy, what I didn't know about him was that both of his Parents lived to be at least 101. His Dad Passed at 101 and his Mom was still Living at 101. He had paid for them both to be in Assisted Living when they turned 83 and it was a brand New Facility so everyone there was moving in to Assisted Living for the 1st time. Well, his Parents ended up both outliving ALL the other Residents not Once, but Twice!!! *LMAOROTF* I dunno, my Gallow's Humor just found that to be fucking hilarious!!!
He said neither of them Planned to Live that long, so couldn't have possibly Saved enuf $$$ to Live that long and cover their expenses. So it was a good thing he was doing Well so he could keep them where they were. He said the only people talking about the Prosperity of America are the Politicians and the Rich People. He said the problem these Days is that nobody is Dying at 65 anymore, so they run out of Money before they Die. So then their Kids have to front the Money, and then whose gonna pay for the Kids to grow Old, their Kids living in their Basement?! So, every Generation beyond his Parent's Generation is gonna be truly Fucked. Well, I Laughed so fucking hard. Coz it's so True. And his humor about this Prez was absolutely hilarious becoz he lived in the same Neighborhood as Donnie Two Dolls for over 35 Years, so Knew him better than most people.
He said, this should have alerted anyone who wanted to Vote for Donnie. True Story, when running for 1.0, they Interviewed Donnie Two Doll's College Roommate from Princeton. And asked if he thought Donnie would make a Good President? And the Roommates reply was, Blindfold me and bring me a Phone Book and let me point to any Name in it, and THAT Person would make a better President! Nuff said. And these Specials were done way before 2.0, when everyone SHOULD have known better than to Elect him again!!! Yet, here we now are. It's surreal. Anyway, most of his Two Specials I watched weren't Political, except for very small portions of his Set, coz he said he's shit talked about every Prez that's ever been Elected in his Lifetime, coz he doesn't fucking Like ANY of them. *LOL* Anyway, by the time I finished watching the 2nd Special The Man has put himself to Bed and is Sleeping like a Baby. Nothing like being in your own Bed at Home after being away from Home.
The Son has to be at Work Tomorrow by 5:00 a.m. this time, so he said if I'm not up by then he'll just Walk there and leave around 4:45 a.m.. Usually I'm up, even tho' on a Thursday Princess T doesn't have to be to Work 'til 7:00 a.m.. So, we're getting up around 6:00 a.m. for sure, but I couldn't guarantee to him I'd be up at 4:45 a.m. for sure. He actually went to High School with one of the Female Co-Workers and they knew many of the same people they both grew up with and she Graduated the same Year he did!!! He said the Male Co-Worker is much Younger and considers them both "Old"... coz they're his Parent's Age. *LOL* He said the Guy is a really nice Kid tho', in his 20's and a hard Worker and good to Work with. He finds it Strange to have someone mebbe 20 Years Old Training him tho'. It's an easy Job and not much to really know to do it if you've had any Work Experience at all, but, he likes the Work and it's easy Work for him, compared to other Jobs he's had that were way more demanding and needed Expertise to do.
I'm glad he's enjoying the Work and his Co-Workers, and that it's so close to Home too, so that transportation isn't an issue. It's only about a 1/4 of a Block from our House, so he can Walk it quickly anytime I can't take him or pick him up. And, his Sister has been Loaned a 10-Speed Bike if he decided he wanted to Ride it rather than Walk it. For most of the Work she's been doing lately the people Hiring her have picked her up and brought her Home. So, only the Jobs in the East Valley have required me to provide her Transportation... and I don't mind coz it's only 1-2 times a Month. And there's lots for me to bide my time and do over there when she's doing 4 Hours of Work Housecleaning. And, it has to be on a Sunday or Monday when Princess T is off Work, so that I can take her clear over to Chandler and not have obligations to pick a Grandchild up in time after Work.
It's the next day now and I did wake up before The Son, so can take him in to Work rather than him Walking there. I've been having some Three In The Mornings anyway and sometimes take Naps now during the Day so that I am more rested from Sleeping less at Night. I think it's coz I got a lot going on and thus a lot of stuff on my Heart and Mind? The Man Slept Peacefully his first Night back Home, I think Hospitalization always wears him out and he probably doesn't get much Sleep even tho' he's in Bed all the time while there. He was having so much Testing, Bloodwork and visits by everyone on his Medical Team that it was just a Lot for him and Sensory Overload. Plus the Worry about what was Wrong with him this time, with everything gong haywire now with his Body and his Mind. I know he's gotta be feeling quite vulnerable and even less able to be Independent and burdensome to everyone. I don't want him Feeling that way, but, you often know the Reality as it stands and have some Awareness.
The Kiddos and Grandkids have told him often, listen, YOU took Care of all of us all these Years, and have always been there for us. And now it's OUR Turn to take Care of you Guys, you've Earned that. Yes, Caregiving of a Child, an Adult, and especially any who have Disabilities and Special Needs, it is considerable. We didn't balk at doing it for them tho' and so they're not balking at doing it for us now the Tables are turning and we Need more of the Care. That's what I just Love about our Kiddos, they also Believe that Family is Everything, just as we do, and so want to be there for each other. Yes, in spite of their own Physical and/or Mental Challenges, they try to be Present for one another and Circle the Wagons when it becomes necessary to hold it down and keep it together, no matter what. It is daunting tho' and scary stuff at times... well, MOST of the time actually. Not for the Faint of Heart or Spirit, that's for Sure.
I see so many Families who are so fractured or dysfunctional in their Relationships with one another, even if nothing is Physically or Mentally Wrong with them, it's just tragically Sad to me. They are not there for one another, sometimes complete Strangers are there more for them than their own Families. We've been there for them more than their own Families. I always Hope for them that they can reconcile their differences enuf to become more functional and less fractured or estranged, but, sometimes that never happens for them. Sometimes they just don't make Family their Priority and you Know when you're NOT someone's Priority and probably never will be. It's like I used to tell folks in my 1st Corporate Life as a Banker and were handling their Cases and Debt Counseling them, and they'd TELL me what their Priorities were, but it didn't Line Up with their Reality whatsoever. They were Talking a Talk but not Walking THAT Walk, so, it just wasn't True.
Some deceived themselves into Believing what they Said, even tho' they weren't Practicing it at all. Others were trying to deceive everyone else it was True, even tho' it wasn't. Whatever you're Spending your Time, Talents and Treasures on, THOSE are your Real Priorities, no matter what you SAY they are. All I had to do was review your Financials and your Checkbook to tell you what your Priorities REALLY were every time. And I can Guarantee that your Time spent and your Talents Spent, pretty much go Hand in Hand with where your Treasures are Spent too. I'd meet those who professed to be devoutly Religious to whatever Brand of Faith they prescribed to, yet, didn't Tithe or Support any Ministry their Church or Temple was providing to the Community... not with their Talents, their Time or their Treasures. So was Serving their God REALLY their Priority, I seriously Doubt it. They might have been Receiving from it, but they sure as Hell weren't Giving to it to reflect any kind of actual Devotion, Obedience, or Sacrifice FOR it in their Actions, just their Talk.
If they told me their Family/Loved Ones were their Priority, but they failed to spend their Time, what they could do for Family, or make Financial and Personal Sacrifices for those Individuals, it probably wasn't as High a Priority as they Imagined those People were to them in actuality. Don't tell me I'm a Priority if you're conspicuous by your very absence, especially during times of greatest Need, coz then I'm Aware that I'm really NOT. Each of us sets our Actual Priorities as we see fit to, that's just the Reality of Life and our Personal Decisions about it and what we choose to Prioritize in it. I have a People First, then Money, then Things Prioritizing on my own Journey, my Actions should ALWAYS reflect that if it's indeed True and I'm not deceiving either myself or anyone else. How you Prioritize those Three things is also up to you and your Actions will always Reflect what is indeed True no matter what you Say is your Truth.
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If what you Say doesn't align with what you Do, your Credibility is Suspect to me coz your Actions don't align with your Words. If they're in conflict then it's NOT True... and there's no such thing as an Alternate Truth, what that's called actually is a Lie. Let's dispel this "Alternate Truth" Bullshit that this Regime is Spinning and trying to Sell. It's Lies and Intentional Misinformation to deceive, there is no Alternative to what's True, the Truth is the Truth and stays consistently the same. Only a Liar has to therefore have a Good Memory to remember what Lies they Spun and will alter as they forget what Lies or Fabrications they Told. Truth is easy as Hell to Remember becoz it remains True and therefore the Same to Tell and keep Telling with consistency and accuracy. It will have Evidence and Proof behind it to back it up, a Lie and Fabrication can't, coz it's Made Up. That's how you Tell the fucking difference and can know what's Real and avoid deception and being deceived and being Tricked or taken Advantage of.
And of coarse, you do have to Ask yourself, can you Handle the Truth? Becoz, Honestly, some folks can't. Or they seem to not be able to... and so would prefer the Lies and the Bullshit becoz it's more palatable to them to. They can therefore Convince themselves that there's an Alternative to Truth and they've now called it an "Alternative Truth". And think that if they Think it often enuf, or Say it often enuf, therefore, it must be True and IS True!!! It can be absurd, outrageous, and unbelievable as fuck, with no Proof and no Evidence to back any of it up, yet, they'll hold onto it tightly. Now, that said, I'm not discounting Faith becoz I might be Mental, but I do Believe that Faith IS the Substance of things HOPED for and the Evidence of things NOT YET Seen. And that is something I hold onto tightly becoz it has and does Sustain me thru a lot of shit that only has HOPE behind it and no Evidence of YET. I Personally try never to become HOPELESS becoz I think then most folks are inclined to just Give Up, Give In, and Give Out without having their Hope intact.
What you might Hope for isn't a Lie, becoz it actually CAN become Manifested and Evident. And maintaining that Hope until it does can make all of the difference in whether you give up or don't. And let us just say, it never Manifests, you have to ask yourself, well, BUT did it Sustain you tho'? If it did, then was it Better than Hopelessness? I'd venture to say it was, regardless, becoz I'd rather Live Life Hopeful than Hopeless. The only time I ever felt I no longer wanted to Live or Care if I did, or not, was the time I felt absolute Hopelessness. And it was awful, becoz I truly did NOT Care anymore, about anything or anyone, including myself, at that lowest point of abject loss of all Hope. I never wanna revisit that ever again, so, give me Hope any day!!! It's preferable. If you are Hopeless, and Reading this, I Wish for you to have Renewed Hope in place of it too. We'll stand in Agreement that you get your Hope back and not be Robbed of it my Friend.
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I don't know what your Situation is, or how dire, what you're up against or going thru, but I do know that without Hope, you might not Survive it. But I have known many a Survivor of some really heavy or horrific Shit, and I've Survived a great deal of it myself. And what made the difference was we didn't give up, give in, or give out, no matter what, we refused to. Only those times of Hopelessness might have taken us down or out, so, Guard your Hope fiercely, don't be Robbed of it or convinced it shouldn't Exist. And in these turbulent uncertain times I do think folks need to be reminded of that becoz I'm seeing more folks that are teetering on Feeling Hopeless. And shit might get worse, in fact, it probably will in some cases, Life isn't just Rainbows, Buttercups, Glitter and Unicorn Farts, it never has been, that's delusional and not Reality Based either. No Life is absolutely Perfect, no Person is without their Trials and Tribulations they will endure during Life's Journey. You just might not Know what they are, you only Know yours.
I remember something I Read in Ms. Pat's Autobiography that was a Profound Statement, coz that Woman has been thru some shit, epic shit, in her Lifetime. But she said when she began making her Life's Story into a Comedic Storytelling of it, she'd often have some in the Audience come up to her after Shows and Thank her becoz they'd been thru similar circumstances and similar shit. And it Surprised her sometimes. Like the time a very affluent White Lady came up in Fancy Clothes, wearing Diamonds and carrying a Gucci Bag, and confided that Yes, she'd been Raped and Molested as a Child too, becoz Pedos are everywhere and so no Demographic is Immune. It shocked Ms. Pat coz she said she never thought that White People had Problems! *LOL* Why?
Becoz her Exposure, to especially a Privileged and different Demographic than herself, made her Imagine they had no Problems. But then she Realized, Yes, People are just People, we ALL have Problems, often similar and relatable ones. We just don't always Know what they are or might be, unless it's Shared between us as part of the Human Experience. We don't really always Know what anyone else is going thru or has gone thru. Therefore we can make a lot of incorrect Assumptions out of our ignorance and lack of exposure to different People. We fail to make those connections that are meaningful enuf to realize Life isn't Perfect for anyone. Yours may not be the Worse Case Scenario or the Best. I try to be Mindful that most are going thru something, even if it's different from what we're going thru.
I've got to Carve out the Time and Patience to take The Grandson back to DES coz they sent us a Denial Letter on his Application for Nutritional Assistance. Why? Becoz he didn't meet their Deadline for making his Appointment. You know, the one you can NEVER MAKE becoz they don't Answer their Phones for you to actually make one!!! And so if they don't Schedule you one to where THEY CALL YOU, you're never getting one. So, now I've got to make that specific request IN PERSON, and they don't do Interviews In Person anymore, but if you get enuf Denial Letters coz you can never get thru on their Phone Lines to make one by Phone, and you won't Go Away and keep coming back, eventually they relent and Schedule you a Phone Call by them for said Interview.
To MEBBE get a Month or Three Worth of Nutritional Assistance ANNUALLY for who has NO MONEY coming in to Buy Food of their own! And must rely on the Charity of Friends or Family for something as Basic as fucking FOOD, in America, the Richest Nation on Earth. Where our Government is willing to spend a BILLION DOLLARS a DAY on an Elective War, but is gutting all Social Services coz they allege we CAN'T AFFORD IT... Why? Coz we must fund this War he started and can't get out of now and has no Exit Ramp to either, so it could last for fucking ever and ever, becoz it is Profiting his Family and Friends after all. They're getting all kinds of Military Contracts, not that it would be any Conflict of Interest mind you. *Eye Roll* And, so it goes.
So, no Money for Nutritional Assistance for the Hungry, no Housing for the Homeless, no Medical for the Uninsured or Underinsured, no Day Care so Parents can Work and Support their Families on poorly paying Jobs, no Mental Healthcare for the Mentally Ill, no Medicaid for the Indigent, cuts to Medicare for the Elderly... coz War Profits and spending a tonnage Daily on an unnecessary War is more Important to them. Is America, ALL of America, including his staunch Supporters and Cult Members, GETTING THIS YET?! Coz it seems as tho' some aren't and still are pretty fucking Delusional about this Regime and their Agenda and Big Grifts and Long Cons they're running with our Tax Dollars, Looting everything and anything they can 'til there's none left and the Nation is Bankrupted.
Like he managed to Bankrupt every Business he's ever had, including Casinos, which, should be an impossibility too!!! Unless you Lock the Doors to a Casino and turn Gamblers away and not just take their Money... which should be the only way you could possibly manage to Bankrupt one!!! And he's managed also to mismanage his own Fortunes numerous times, not just Millions of Dollars he's had in Inheritances and Profits, but BILLIONS of Dollars worth. And so now he Needs all YOUR Money too, all OUR Tax Dollars to Squander and Blow Thru now. Until there's none left to Blow Thru anymore. And I do Believe he could do it... even if nobody else ever could, he definitely can, his Track Record shows us he can Squander an unlimited amount of Money like nobody ever has before and may never again!!! His ability to Grift Money and be a Consummate Conman and spot a way to commit Crimes without going to Prison for any of them, coz he Buys People, the Right People, is ONLY matched by his ability to Blow Thru all the Money he makes off it all.
And America Entrusted him to have that Power, not Once, but Twice! Fool you once shame on him, Fool you twice, shame on YOU! And Buy enuf Supreme Court Justices to be Immune from Prosecution. Pardon any of his Sycophants who Commit his Crimes for him, no matter what Crimes they are, Protect all his Pedophile Friends and himself from Prosecution for being a Serial Sexual Predator, continue to Vote even tho' he's a Felon of more Counts than any Mob Boss probably ever. Go after his Political Enemies in every Illegal way imaginable. Even with no Proof or Evidence they've committed any Crimes. But will have the Expense and Fear, damage of their Reputations and Careers, of going thru an Indictment anyway on the Trumped Up Charges {Pun Intended that this Word is so fucking accurate for his Surname and what it means}.
Suppress your Voting Rights and taking away your Human Rights methodically too. Ignore Due Process and just pick you up and put you in his Concentration Camps for no real reasons. He's got quite the Racket all sewn up, rigging the Systems, hasn't he? I mean I've just Touched on the Tip of the Iceberg of what is to come if checks and balances don't come into play real fucking soon! But, I do hold out Hope that the People will be enough of The Resistance to prevail eventually and hold them all to Account. I don't wanna be Patient and Wait for God to Judge and Punish them. Patience not being one of my particular Virtues when it comes to Tolerance of Evil and Criminal Behaviors going Off The Rails like a runaway Train that will create carnage to us all if we're just Tied to the Tracks, becoz we refuse to get On Board The Crazy Train like his Base has.
And embrace their Abusers and excuse and try to Protect them for anything and everything they do, including Sexually Abusing Children. And allowing Revenge and Retribution in their Leadership to Play Out successfully. Yep, it makes you Complicit if you still Support it. I'm way beyond Sick of it... and I suspect many of you are too. And we should refuse to be Silenced and forced into Compliance, to become part of the Problem rather than part of the Solution my Friends. You have to be able to Handle the Truth tho', so... CAN YOU??? I'll Wait for the Answer... and Silence and keeping one's Mouth tightly shut out of Fear or whatever makes you NOT Speak Up and Be Heard, or refuse to get Involved and Serious about all of this, is NOT an Answer to that Question. And that uncomfortable Truth may be hard for some to Swallow... or Handle.
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Speaking Truth to Power coz some of us has to... coz the fucking Silence of America has become deafening... Dawn... The Bohemian
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