More Bad News... Dammit!!!

 I just found out we've been using up a lot of our Cox Data, I wasn't aware of what all is eating it up until now.   So, we'll have to be more aware since we have Three Generations using this Wi-Fi connection.   The Kiddos Gaming, Streaming and NetFlix, my Computer use, mostly for Blogging, all equates and we got up to 90% of our allowed usage by the end of this pay period.  We've never gone over so Cox gave me Courtesy alerts and thankfully we didn't get charged extra.   Today was the start of the new period so we will try to do better this Month and not use so much Data.  *LOL*   We bundle with Cox, with our Computer, Wi-Fi, Cable TV and Landline Phone.  {Yes, we still have one.}

The Kiddos have been Grateful I'm a Dinosaur about keeping my Landline and the same Number I've had since before they all were Born, becoz anytime they have Cell Phone Issues they use the Landline Phones at Home.  *Smiles*   And my Mouse and Keyboard wore out so I had to replace them both too!   I was going thru Blog withdrawal with not having a way to access my computer.  Now I've got to learn a feel for the new Keyboard and Mouse, they didn't have any like the ones that came with this Wireless PC, so this has chunkier not so flush to the Keyboard Keys and a higher Mouse.  It usually only takes me a few Days to acclimate my Hands to the difference and get back up to Speed Typing.  *LOL*

We got more Bad News, The Daughter's Boss Texted her that he's Closing his Phoenix location, Selling his Home, and moving to Prescott, which is where he was all Labor Day Weekend, so, she no longer has a Job.   He owes her for her last Pay Period and then she'll have no more income coming in at all.  It was only a little part time 3 Day a Week Job but it helped with some of her expenses.  Now I will have to coax her into going in to Social Security and re-applying for her SSI, which she used to be on Social Security Disability Years ago before moving to Mexico.  They will likely require another Psyche Eval Update, and assign her a Caseworker, but, it's not like her Diagnosis has a Cure, it's a Permanent Condition that doesn't improve.

She's dreading being sent to another Agency and another Shrink.  The last one I took her to that our Doc referred us to said she was too Unstable for their Program/Treatment and would have to be stabilized for a full Year to Qualify for their Services!!!   I may have told you that unbeknownst to me they were evaluating ME too while I was there helping her thru the Process and said I was too Unstable as well!!!  *Bwahahaha*  That was hilarious to us, I wasn't even there for an Evaluation and thought I was doing Just Fine?!  *LMAOROTF*   So, there ya have it... and so... no telling what Social Security will say or come up with when I take her in?  *Eye Roll*

Years ago, when she initially Qualified she has a bad Memory of the experience.  The SSI Caseworker Triggered her and was very Offensive, we were on the 3rd Floor of the Building near a Window and The Daughter got agitated and threatened to throw the Woman and her Computer out the fucking Window!!!   Well, she immediately got Approved lest they have a Situation they could not handle.  Frankly, that Caseworker clearly had no Training or Experience dealing with the Seriously Mentally Ill applying for Disability Benefits and a poor understanding of Mental Illness in general.

She had been abrasive and surly towards both of us, saying The Daughter didn't LOOK Mentally Ill and I asked her what Mental Illness LOOKED LIKE and was she a Psychiatrist?   We'd already been sent there by The Daughter's Shrink and Therapist, I had Custody of her Children as a Kinship Placement due to the extent of her illness.  At that time she was living on the Streets and in/out of Institutions constantly for Mental Health related Incidents, so, everything was very well Documented, but this Caseworker thought that she was and LOOKED just Fine and appeared to be Okay in her Amateur ignorant bullshit Opinion!

So, she was just about to Deny us when The Daughter exploded saying she needed to turn off the Noise her Computer Printer was making or she'd throw it and the Woman out the fucking Window!  I had seen the Daughter Winding Up during the difficult Interview, so that the Noise was agitating her and the last Straw.  The Daughter was pretty Checked Out of the Eval by then and getting very Psychotic by the Stress of how long the Eval had taken and the Woman's demeanor being so confrontational, not Wise to challenge someone whose very Unwell.   Especially if it was gonna be for nothing and a complete waste of our Time... so she just lost her Shit at that point.  Nothing I could do about it.

Above is a Blast from the 1970's Halloween Past of me with The Daughter's Bio Father, who she has never met.   But I digress, back to the SSI debacle Story... The Woman was saying she couldn't turn the Printer Off and I said she better pull it's plug then or it and her would need to be able to Fly coz we were Three Floors Up!  I remember the Caseworker crawling under the Desk and unplugging it in a Panic!!   I was restraining The Daughter, and trying to Talk her Down, no easy task, they get real Strong.  She can toss large Appliances when she's Psychotic.   Allegedly it took Seven Police Officers to restrain me when I was, or at least that's what the Seven Officers told me when I got out of the Psyche Hospital and they came to do a Welfare Check on me.  *LOL*  Bless 'em, they were very Kind in spite of how Mental I was at the time.  *Winks*  So, it's not Wise to Wind our Asses Up.  *Bwahaha*

So when the Woman had finally ended the Triggering Noise, she said to Be Calm, she was Approving our Case coz NOW she could SEE and be a Witness that everything clearly was NOT FINE and LOOKS could be deceiving!!!   Ya Think!?   I think she Learned a Valuable Lesson that day about SMI and Paranoid Schizophrenia/Borderline Personality Disorder in General, when she MET one of the Darker Alters of the Four that The Daughter has cohabitating in One Body/Brain.  *LOL*  And it's always a last resort for us to even ask/beg for Help, since, we know it's parsed out sparingly and you almost have to be Flavor of the Month or have influential Connections.  And yes, I've pulled in Favors if I have the Cultivated Contacts, sure I do.  It's certainly never based on actual Need or Circumstances, that's for damned sure.  

So, yeah, neither one of us is looking forward to having to risk a repeat performance of all that.   Since, The Daughter does not want an involuntary State Hospital or Psyche Section of the Jail Stay if things go badly and sideways.   She'd rather just have a little Job and not be dependent on The System, but, most Businesses are hesitant to hire someone with full blown Schizophrenia, for obvious liability reasons associated with the Illness.   At the Garage they allowed her any Mental Health Days she required and she did a good Job for them when she was Well enuf to Work.  Plus, the Owner is a Friend of the Family and Adores her as a Dear Friend, she is Ride or Die with her Friends/Family.  She's also a hard Worker.

Shit, when she was Younger, she wanted to Work at a SUBWAY Sammie Shop but they wouldn't Hire her due to her Illness.   So, she just started coming in without being Hired, borrowed a Spare Uniform and was Working there with no Pay until the Manager found out and banned her from the Store!!!   *LMAO*  Yeah, Bat Shit Crazy she is like that.   And, since we would prefer to have no Incidents or Situations...  I really just would prefer her to Re-Qualify for SSI so she can have a sustainable way to semi-support herself.   So it's not 100% on our Dime, since, she's 43 Years Old and would otherwise be Homeless and no Income again, which, how do they expect a Seriously Disabled Human Being to Survive with a Serious Illness and no Shelter, Food, Income, Care?

That's a rhetorical Question by the way, frankly, they don't Care if any of those Human Beings Survive, they'd prefer them to just hurry up and Die actually.   Or, for their Families to provide everything Forever and shoulder the entire burden, no matter how much of a hardship it is. Which is why you do see people in those Conditions among the Unhoused Populations with no means of any Support or proper Care.  Often many of them can only function that way, this is the first time The Daughter has been able to live among us and be semi-functional and even semi-independent within an actual Home since she was 15 Years Old!  Being Homeless is often less complicated for her to manage, but, it is a Hard Life with an even higher Mortality Rate.  What The Daughter has lived thru and Survived is unbelievable, she is a Survivor, that's for sure. 

Princess T is going to apply for a Job too on Saturday, I have to work my deceased Friend Dan's Shift Today, so I didn't want to do much else.  I've been Emotionally strained lately, so I spent a lot of time Today just Pricing more Inventory to take in.  And then we JUST got word from Mexico that Saint Maria just Died, she's the Paternal Grandma in Mexico of Princess T and the Younger Sisters.  She Raised the Younger Three Sisters who have been her Caregivers in recent times since she was over 90 Years Old.   The Girls now have no-one and all Three are still underaged.  We can't get them into America, we tried before unsuccessfully.  So, The Daughter is calling extended Relatives of her Ex to find out who will look out for the Kids?

Her Ex is in Jail there and his New Wife abandoned the Kids after he was sent away.   So, I have to assume someone was helping the Kids since Maria couldn't and needed the Children to Care for her.   So, we're trying to piece together what's going on for the Welfare of The Daughter's Three Youngest Daughters.   And, of coarse The Daughter is distraught, she Loved her MIL and they've always kept in touch even after she and Maria's Son broke up and he remarried.   Well, he was never actually legally Married to our Daughter, but, they have Four Daughters together and were together a very long time.   Only The Young Prince is not Salvador's Child, his Dad is an American of Puerto Rican heritage who lives locally.  I get along with Bobby just fine and he's been good to The G-Kid Force, even tho' Princess T is not his Child, he always includes her in anything he does for her Brother and his other Bio Kids.

He still gets along with The Daughter, in spite of their turbulent Past, coz both are Clean now from Dangerous Drugs and that's Helpful.   The Grandson's Dad recently separated from the Fiance', they have Two Children together, a Boy and a Girl, so, The Young Prince isn't sure how often he'll get to see his Younger Siblings now that Angie and his Dad aren't together?   She's a great person and our Family have always liked and gotten along with her, so it's possible she may stay in touch for the sake of the little Brother and Sister?   The little Brother will be 12 already at the end of this Week, they grow up so fast, hard to believe he'll be a Teenager next Year already!!!  Last time I saw them was at our Grandson's Wedding though, which we Hosted here at our Home.  I know where they live, if Angie doesn't Sell that Home?

I'll be filling in at Work again, this time for my elderly Friend Sue, who we call The General.   She's over 80 also, but a tough old Gal who Retired from being a Military Surgical Nurse, so she's tough as Old Boots.   She became a Widow a few Years ago, most of my Married Friends are Widows now who are my Age or Older.   Several of us were Full Time Unpaid Caregivers of our Disabled or ailing Husbands, Sue was too.   Her Husband had become seriously Disabled way back in the Korean War, she met him after his injuries and being badly burned, since, she was his Nurse while he was recovering from his horrific wounds, which created some disfigurement, he had melted Ears that were visible and much damage not visible. 

 So, theirs was one of those Wartime Love Stories and she was devoted to him and kept him going until they both were in their Eighties!!!  He actually committed Suicide or may have lived longer... so, his was one of those passings that was awkward for people.   Sue took it in stride, she of all people knew the extended level of her Dear Husband's suffering.  Perhaps he just could not take it anymore and that was my stance about it even when some folks tried to vilify a Death by Suicide.   Until it's them or someone they Love, very little, if any, point of reference or understanding.   She's a very Spiritual person so I'm sure it was hard for her to discuss with those people who feel some kind of way about Deaths by Suicide. 

So, anyway, I'll be working again, last Night was super busy for a Wednesday Night, you'd of thought we were having a Sale.  I already Sold half the Halloween Merch I'd only brought in the day before, including the Vintage Ouija Board which was still Factory Sealed, so I got a good price for it.   It wasn't a super Old Spirit Board, those can fetch a LOT and I have some of those, but I won't have an actual Planchette that is a Portal for the Boards in my Home or Storage, superstitious about that, so was my Mom.   You can have Attachments to even the most benign Objects if they meant something Special to someone who has Crossed Over and is still Attached to whatever it is tho'. 

The Daughter got hold of all Three of her Kids, the Youngest is handling the Death of their Grandma Saint Maria very well.   The middle one is now Calmer, she was hysterical at first and was the main Caregiver of her Abuelita after Salvador's Wife abandoned them all.  She even quit School to be able to Care for the Old Lady, so perhaps she can now finish her Education.   The Oldest one Works and goes to College on her Scholarships she Won, she's handling it hardest, but, she's the Oldest and thus had more Years with her Abuelita.   Even tho' Saint Maria has numerous Grandchildren that her Son had Fathered, she was fondest of our Daughter's Children and Raised those Three Younger ones.

I'm not Judging Diana, the New Wife, after her Husbands abduction and violent kidnapping at their Home, not knowing for Six Months if he was Alive or Dead, she was stuck with Caring for his 90 Year Old Mother, her Three Kids and The Daughter's Three Teen Girls.  It was a LOT and a lot of PTSD Trauma.  Then, he turned up Alive and subsequently is now in Jail/Prison and we don't know the whole back story of that either, not sure I need or want to know.   But, when Diana fled, I have to assume she might have been fearful of her own Safety and that of her Children?  She's gotta do whatever she's gotta do, I don't stand in Judgment.  Most especially when I don't know everything going on that is beyond the control of even the best of people, breaking points happen to everyone.  If you don't Believe that... just keep on Livin'... 

  She did the best she could for as long as she could, that I know.  She couldn't take that whole Show on the Road, also lugging an Invalid 90+ Year Old with advanced Dementia and frail, plus Three Teenagers in School and College, plus her own Three Younger Kids and no place for that many people.  It would have been a lot to support and handle too.   And, the Teens conveyed that they felt Safer and more Secure staying put where they knew, in their Grandma's Home, they wouldn't leave her behind, tho' caring for the Home was clearly too much for them.  My understanding and realistic expectation is, Three Young Teens between ages of only 13-17, caring for a Home without any Adult present and Extreme Caregiving for an Elder would be Too Much for ANY Child to manage with any measure of actual Success.

 They've done the best they can, for as long as they could too, at tender ages and with incredible resiliency.   All of this is beyond everyone's Control, so we all just have to figure it out as we go and made do with whatever we can.  An Aunt has conveyed that she is worried now that the Old Lady Died, that Social Services may intercede... the Home is dirty and has deferred maintenance, Maria having been too Old for a very long time to keep up with it all.   Why Social Services didn't before get involved is probably becoz they didn't know those Kids were abandoned, alone and trying to Care for their Dying Grandmother without any Help?   We sent Money, that's all we could do for them from an Internationally complex Situation.  I know nothing about International Laws and Services available, it's hard enuf here to get present Help, let alone in a 3rd World Country with even more Corruption and Political unrest.

We never had any problems from the Mexican side, but the American side will not allow us to bring those Children into the Country since we do not have Custody.   And The Daughter is not Well enuf to ever gain Custody, and I know it took well over Three Years of very complex and expensive Litigation for me to even Adopt the Two Grandkids I Raised since Birth.   So, those Three would be Grown Ass Adults before I could obtain Legal Custody and not have the more complex Ward of the State Issues the New Laws have put into effect.   Which frankly, the New Laws aren't skewed in favor of keeping Families together or for the Children involved to remain with Kinfolk.  It's all become rather transactional and about Money... Saving Money and then distributing it to who has the most Political Sway with no regards to actual Cost if it pads the right Pockets. 

 Laws which now Force an Adoption upon Kinship Placement if no reunification of  a Parent is possible.   No way I'd risk Three Beautiful Teen Girls being put up for involuntary transactional Adoption by or to Strangers.  Exploitation and Sex Trafficking of Young Kids is Real, especially of Marginalized Kids and their Families who don't have the resources to obtain Justice.   If I sound cynical it's becoz I AM!  I've seen too much to be naive about these Systems in place.  I really do Hope for Reform of a lot of Systems that aren't working for the people it should Help most.   But, so long as you follow the Money, you can understand why a lot of it hasn't been fixed in over half a Century, those Fat Cats profiting most off of it all just keep getting more obscenely Rich at the expense of the Middle Class, the Poor and the Marginalized of Society.

 Anyway, the Oldest in Mexico of The Daughter's Brood will be 18 this December, so her Plan is to get Custody of her Two Younger Sisters and just all live together, asking us for Help financially when it's necessary and needed.  We sent whatever we can, but now that The Daughter has lost her Job she's had to tell them we can only now send what I can afford to.  Usually she sent about half of her earnings to them to Help Maria out with their expenses and Care... and her Care too once it was Extreme Caregiving the Old Lady needed.  

 Now, we Hope that once the Oldest is 18 she can find a Legal Pathway to visit America, if she gains Custody of her Sisters, she can then bring them across too.   If not for living here permanently, at least to visit and contemplate a Bright Future whether here or in Mexico, as Young Adults.  Saint Maria always told me she would try to last until the Oldest was at least Grown of the Trio, Bless her, she was only 2.5 Months away from managing that.   I've been Channeling my Inner Morticia for a long, long time already, so, what would be Three More Children when things are already Mi Vida Loca, Right?  *LMAOROTF*

The Son had taken a Day off Work to help his Blind Girlfriend with her Move, I didn't know he wasn't Working so I got a little concerned he'd lost his Job too?  *LOL*   I mentioned it to The Man of why The Son was Home and did he get Laid Off too?   Without missing a beat, in Gallow's Humor Style he simply deadpanned, "Well, I Hope not, since I don't know how many of them can work at SAVERS?"  *Bwahahahahaha*  I told the Kiddos and they were Laughing their Asses off and explained why he'd taken a Day off with Pay.   He has Vacay time Earned and had to return her U-Haul Rental this Morning and they didn't open until much later than he'd have to be at Work.  She's Blind so cannot drive... so he just spent the Night at her place and brought it back for her.   He's known this Gal since they were Kids and she could See.  She has some degenerative Eye Disease that is slowly Blinding her and only has very limited partial Sight now.

*******

Yep, we're a Motley Crew around here... but we Circle those Wagons and are Ride or Die and that's what Counts at the end of the Day my Friends... The Fair Weather People won't last, but, we will... Dawn... The Bohemian