Today is actually our Anniversary, we will do nothing coz he's just not Well enuf to, but, he's Lived to see it, so that's been Enough. Well, it seems some of my Friends here in The Land of Blog have had a slew of their own Medical Emergency Issues, Holy Hell, we're dropping like Flies, WTF?! So, Healing Energies being sent your way for each of you going thru some shit right now too. My last Post was a hard one for me coz Family isn't Coping well with everything going on and so that often means the Wheels come Off with some of them. Mostly it will mean they self-medicate to numb themselves when they don't Cope Clean or Sober, so that's always a risk factor when Stressors pile up and their Mental Illness Triggers badly up under Stress. So, it's been a Wild Ride, not just with The Man's Medical Emergency, but trying to keep at least some of them on the Rails and Coping in acceptable ways. Some are holding up, some aren't.
I got all The Daughter's dirty Laundry done so now we have Towels again, we'd wondered where they had all gone? Now we know. She'd been hiding all her dirty Laundry in the Triple Bunks in the 5th Wheel... among other things she'd been hiding. With having Caseworkers coming I had to get everything in Order. I had cancelled The Man's Caseworker/Nurse for Tuesday, she's approved to come Weekly so will come next Tuesday instead. But, Wednesday is The Young Prince's Caseworker and that can't be delayed as it may get him the Services and Evaluation he desperately Needs. I just Hope his Living Quarters he's been able to work on enuf it would pass an Inspection by his Caseworker?
I've toyed with the Idea that he could show them the newly Organized/Orderly 5th Wheel instead, if his Space just wouldn't cut it right now. He can explain he's just Moving In from being in New Mexico, which, is True. And we don't have everything unpacked with placement yet, also True. He has a lot of Cargo, way more than he left Arizona with. He accumulated while in New Mexico and Allen gave him practically everything since Allen is a True Minimalist and really wanted to Keep only a TV and a Chair. *LOL* So, everything came by U-Haul and Allen's Grandpa and Stepdad didn't have a lot of Time to unload it so it just got put anywhere and everywhere. I just appreciated them getting it to Arizona for him and Bankrolling his Move, it had been a long Day for them from Sunup to Sundown.
I know Allen's Family would really rather never have to Deal with any of it now forevermore and I don't blame them. Dealing with Allen is probably more than enuf for their Family. And us Dealing with The Young Prince is also more than enuf for this Family too, so, I understand completely. I couldn't Deal with Allen as well either. Anyway, Allen has been decent enuf about sending some Money and mailing some other items that he couldn't bring on the U-Haul. They are attempting to be as amicable as a pending Divorced can be. Sometimes you can just Love the Wrong Person and it all can be more than you bargained for, that's my Take on their Union. Both of them have significant Issues, and combined, it was just a Lot. Allen is very high functional and very intelligent, but also, quite Autistic and Bipolar. The Son is too so I know how that Combo of Diagnosis can go Off Rails from time to time and really impair Relationships and Behavior.
With The Wheels coming Off for The Daughter, it meant that both The Son and her Son aren't Coping with that very well. They had so wanted her to remain on Track, we all did, this was the longest she ever hadn't been Using. They HAD to Help me with what she left in her Wake and they could see how hard that was for me, which in turn made them both very Upset and Angry. The Son began Drinking to Cope, not a good Idea, he didn't intend to make me upset with him so just went to his Room so he could Dial it back Emotionally out of my presence. The Young Prince took an extra Wellbutrin and that helped him, but he Cried a lot and worries about his Mom, and is Angry at her, and is Tired of things never being able to remain Stable with her for very long. He understands Logically, since he has an almost identical Diagnosis, but Emotionally it's just very hard as her Son. And someone can have Sobriety and be Clean or Sober for Years but fall right back into it with just One relapse.
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Both Kiddos know they can never have a very Functional Relationship with her, she's not capable of it, even when she's Clean and Sober, it's still challenging with the Mental Illness. They understand why we had to Raise them, with her Living here for the past 3-4 Years it's become very apparent that she can't even properly look after herself, let alone be a Fit Parent to any Child, ever. Or make Good Decisions on a consistent basis or choose good Relationships to be in either. She tends to choose very unhealthy toxic Relationships and that's been problematic since her Teens... and that's when she had The Young Prince... and then subsequently Four more Kiddos she could not Raise. I Raised the Two Oldest, Saint Maria in Mexico, the Paternal Grandmother, had to Raise the Three Younger Ones. Since her only Child, her Son, and the Father of Four of The Daughter's Children, is a complete Train Wreck too.
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He has so many Kids he Fathered that I don't know I even have a total Count, we think it's 15 tho'. Numerous Baby Mamas. He should have been Neutered. He was Married Twice, but most of the Children he Fathered he never Married their Mothers, including our Daughter, but, they were together for many Years. The Daughter did help Care for Maria in some of the final Years of the Old Lady, she was 90 when she finally Passed, she tried to last, Bless her. She was Single Parenting the Trio of Granddaughters when she was in her 70's and 80's! I can't even fucking imagine doing that coz I was a Younger Grandparent Raising the Older Two, mostly as a Single Parent due to The Man's extent of Disability and needing Full Time Caregiving, and it was a lot at MY Age! Maria was my own Mother's Age! Her Son is closer to my Age. He had Older Kids the Age of our Daughter.
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Anyway, I PM'd her that she's kicked out, coz her Phone is Off, it's probably broken, she breaks Phones fairly often... or loses them. So, don't know she'll get any PM's on Social Media now or Texts or Calls. I don't hear from her hardly at all and now I know why, she knows how I feel about anyone Using, Zero Tolerance Policy. If she's not Clean she becomes even more Paranoid than usual and knows that especially her Brother can tell coz he's a recovering Addict. He's coming up on Five Years Clean and had really Hoped she wouldn't fall back and relapse. So, he was devastated she has, but had been accusing her of it even without Proof. She'd been telling me she would drop a UA and I felt duped coz I honestly can't always tell when someone is High coz I don't Use and never have. And a Paranoid Schizophrenic acts Weird most of the time anyway and she has gone Wheels Off Mentally a few times since she's been here, it happens regularly and always will, whether she's self-medicating or not.
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So discerning Mental Health Relapsing or getting worse, and whether or not they've compounded it with self-medicating, is not always possible. And with the Boyfriend having Cancer I didn't know what strong Drugs his Docs have him on or if he self-medicates too? And, I'm taking him at his Word as to what his Diagnosis has been, as you do anyone, I wouldn't think someone would pretend to have Stage 4 Cancer?! But I don't know any of his Family to verify information either. And someone's Medical information is none of my Business anyway, that's confidential and personal, so I don't Need to Know. But I know what is prescription and what isn't, and what I don't want brought to our Property ever by anyone. So, if anyone is ever foolish enuf to do it, they're on the Outs and broke Trust. She's been looking Healthy but now I think she's risking being Healthy, it worries me but I can't stay Clean FOR her. That's a Self Job to stay Clean or Sober and some folks have a lifelong struggle with it.
I've still gotta get our Taxes done too but gathering up everything and knuckling down to get it in Order before going to our CPA and transferring some Funds around in case we Owe, I Dread every Year. It's not even that it's that hard, it's just a Pain in the Ass and I resent it coz the obscenely Wealthy don't even Pay their Taxes and our Government never goes after them for evasion. Yet, they once went after The Son for Owing Ten Dollars more when he was doing Temp Work while Unemployed!!! The Government sent an Auditor, for Two Weeks, to Collect Ten Bucks... wonder what that Cost in his Wages that makes absolutely no Sense Economically? But, hey, we're wasting a BILLION Dollars a DAY on this Ego War for this Maniac President... so clearly Waste, Fraud and Balancing the Budget to Protect the American People and our Money, really isn't the Issue, is it?
And this Year The Son Owes more than that due to the whole ACA Fiasco this Administration has caused. Coz he Qualified for a Healthcare Subsidy when he was Working, but now the Government wants to "Claw Back" all those Funds from him and he's NOT Working and has no Income to pay it all back, so, WTF?! He didn't have the Money for the Insurance when he WAS Working in the first place, which is precisely Why he Qualified for the Subsidy, so, what the Actual Fuck!!!???!!! But, you can't be Uninsured either, you have to show Proof of Insurance when you File your Taxes!!! So, he doesn't know what all that will mean come April 15th when he can't make any Payment towards what they're slamming him with to "Claw Back" Money they Approved him for in the Subsidy they never told him they'd then want back!!! Don't call it a Subsidy then, call it a fucking Loan then, so that who Qualifies for it knows then it will be Mandatory to pay it back right away!!! They're deceiving folks and causing Crisis on top of Crisis and Hardships with this ACA Marketplace Bullshit.
I finally got evidence in Writing that the Government finally accepted my Appeal NOT to be Penalized for the rest of my Natural Life due to them fucking up about my Medicare and the Insurance they claimed I didn't have for Four Years!!! I always did have Insurance under TriCare For Life, which means you can't then also have Medicare Part D. Both are Federal Programs. So, during the first Four Years I was under United Healthcare, no problems, I was Insured for my Prescription Coverage under TriCare and got all my Meds from Express Scripts when the Base quit carrying my Diabetic Meds. So, now instead of getting them Free, I'm paying $200+ a Month, but, whatever, the Government keeps screwing over our Veterans and their Families taking away or eroding our Earned Benefits all the damned time, you have no choice but to roll with it.
Well, then Fast Forward to 2026 when both AETNA and United Healthcare decided to dump Thousands of Medicare Clients from certain areas, and specifically Retired Military Seniors and their Spouses!!! So, Maricopa County, tho' far from being Rural, wasn't "Cost Effective", so United Healthcare dumped all of us who had TriCare. HUMANA picked us up but now messed up and enrolled me in a Plan that had Part D even tho' I'd told them, at Enrollment, I can't have Part D, I have TriCare for my RX! Well, I didn't know they'd enrolled me in the Wrong Plan until now Social Security and Medicare start Penalizing me saying I don't have ANY Prescription Drug Coverage and that's not allowed, and I Enrolled Late {I didn't, I met all Deadlines}.
And then TriCare thought I had Part D and wouldn't refill my Rx... and The System still showed I did have TriCare so HUMANA realized, Ooops, we fucked up and put her on the Wrong Plan! And I spent since January cleaning up that Cluster Fuck and getting put on the Right Plan and getting my Penalties Waived and Refunded by Appealing the decision! And getting my Meds uninterrupted so that I'd receive them from Express Scripts still and convince them, No, I wasn't dropped from TriCare and I don't have Part D Medicare paying for or Providing my Prescriptions Drug Coverage!!! And proving to the Government that I had one or the other, which is required, or you get Penalized for LIFE, even if you don't have one or the other for only a short period of time! Which that in and of itself is quite the Shakedown and Racket, don'tcha think?
And if you barely followed all that Chaos, I barely did either. I sent in Four different PILES of extensive Paperwork to Prove my Rx Coverage and Appeal their decision to Penalize me for LIFE by taking Money out of my Social Security Checks every Month that I didn't Owe coz I was always in compliance, it wasn't me who fucked up, it was a Provider, penalize THEM if you need to Penalize someone permanently for an error made!!! So now every Month the Government is Refunding me Money they erroneously charged me and HUMANA had to send me a New Card showing the Corrected Plan I'm on and a Letter stating they'd corrected everything and it wasn't my Fault it got cocked up!!! I don't know how many Seniors are in good enuf Shape of Mind or Body to Fight such Fights or Advocate for themselves? But, it almost sent me right over the fucking Edge, but, I do go Hard once I'm forced into Battle with anyone, even the damned Government. I will bury those Motherfuckers in Evidence, Proof, Paperwork, Appeals, Phone Calls, I'll use their Hired Help as Free Therapy to Rant on their Dime, I don't give a Fuck. *Winks*
If they were gonna Penalize me almost Fifteen Bucks a Month out of my Social Security Check for something I didn't do and didn't owe, by God I was gonna get my Money's Worth and a Pound of their Flesh for it. Trust and Believe, pay now or pay more Later if you're gonna try to take my Money or deny me anything I'm Entitled to becoz I Earned it and it's my Money, Motherfuckers! *Smiles* Anyway, about every Week I get a different Letter from Social Security telling me I'm getting a different amount now, so, I won't really know what the amount truly is until I receive it, coz Social Security seems really confused about what I should be getting, every Letter has said something completely different, WTF?! It's gone up each Letter tho', so... whatever... so long as it's not going down I'll be Okay with them giving me more and adjusting things accordingly if they've fucked up in their Favor and now have to pay me back.
I transferred the Money out of our Emergency Savings in prep for getting our Taxes done, no telling how that will go, since I think the IRS is as cocked up now as Social Security is and the FBI is under this ridiculously incompetent and corrupt Administration. My Friend Kendra is in Facebook Jail for a Month right now for posting critical but True Political Opinions about this Administration and it's Corruption. She's a Retired Corporate Executive and knows the Law well. Apparently now you can only have Opinions that are Negative against the Democrats? *Eye Roll*
We're heading closer and closer into complete Authoritarianism and Dictatorship Territory with the Censorship being forced upon us now and upon the Media Sources to only say what the Government Approves of and flatters them, even if it's complete Bullshit and has not an ounce of Truth. They are real big Fans of what they call "Alternative Truth", which used to be called a Lie... but... whatever. Their Base only Believes Lies now so they want the rest of us to also. *Bigger Eye Roll* Yeah, I don't Trust Liars or Thieves and I never will. And they're both in this Administration, so, they will never Earn my Trust or Support for their unprecedented Corruption and Crimes, ever.
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We've already been Issued another Heat Advisory this Morning, it's 18 Degrees Hotter than Usual before 8:00 in the Morning! They usually never issue Heat Advisories until about May. By Tomorrow we will hit Triple Digit Temps for the earliest ever in Recorded History and they're expecting it to surpass 106 already!!! I can't even think about what that means when full on Spring and Summer comes coz 118 isn't unusual in the late Spring and thruout Summer, so 18-22 Degrees above Average Temps would mean we could reach 140... you can Cook shit at that Temperature and anything over 104 puts your Body in Heat Distress, that's about what you can reasonably handle before your Body has the Need to Cool Down or risk Health Issues. I'm acclimated to Desert Living, but not for 140 Temperatures!!! No Living Thing is.
There was a Job Opening in Receiving where The Granddaughter Works and The Son applied for it this Morning, but, they'd already filled the Position. If the Guy doesn't work out tho', he may have a chance. It's way less than he's used to earning in the Trades, but during previous Trades Layoffs he's taken Jobs at places that pay less like Wal-Mart or Total Wine in Retail Establishments. It's not like you have to make it a Career when you just need a Job. Right now the Jobs Market is not good in any types of Jobs at all levels and worsening all the time. The Son has never been out of Work this long since he was only 14 Years Old and he's almost 40 now. It's disheartening to him since he's a really good Employee and added Value anywhere he's ever worked, but, that hardly matters anymore it seems. Employers don't seem to Value good Work Ethic like they used to and to be Fair and Balanced about the Topic, a lot of Employees seem to not Care about the Work they do either.
The Son grilled some Chicken for Lunch, he made some Garlic and Herb flavor and some Spicy flavor with "Slap Yo Mama" Seasoning. And some Garlic and Buttered Herb Seasoned Baby New Potatoes. He's taken over the Cooking since his Sister left, The Daughter had been doing the Cooking and helping me with Housekeeping and Caregiving, now the Guys are stepping up and helping me with that. The Man usually doesn't behave as well for The Son or The Grandson, I think it's a Male Prideful thing. But he's aware of the Situation with The Daughter and has been more cooperative, knowing I need the breaks and present Help. So he can't become difficult to where nobody wants to do it to fill in for me. So he ate a little bit of what The Son cooked, not enough, but, amid complaints about it, he did eat some at least. *Eye Roll*
He claimed it was too "Spicy" even tho' he wasn't given the Spicy flavor. He won't starve between that Meal and the next so I just took it away and said I'd heat it up for him later on. *Winks and Snickers* Sometimes I don't put up with the fussiness and bogus excuses, but I choose my Battles wisely too. *Smiles* He's been Napping a lot since coming Home, I don't think he Slept well at the Hospital, unfamiliar surroundings and they probably Woke him often for Tests and to get his Vitals and such. So, I'm letting him rest up as needed, and he's not Walking Well yet so we're just bringing him what he needs so he doesn't have to get up and move around too much, risking a Fall. He Slept in this Morning, which is unusual for him, and he didn't get up during the Night either, also unusual for him. So the Surgery really wiped him out.
He's got to get a follow-up Scheduled with Dr. Pham, the Cardiologist, whose Office is West of us in Verrado, it's a new Facility out there near a big Planned Community. Then they want him to do a follow-up with a Kidney Doctor, Dr. Ting, so I'm kinda concerned he has some Kidney Issues now that we weren't aware of? They told him his Kidneys weren't working good so I really do Pray he won't need Dialysis, that happens a lot with Diabetes, it can damage so much in your Body, especially Major Organs. We're both on protective Medications for our Organs, but, sometimes that's just not enough if the condition worsens or cannot be managed effectively... or, just coz you get Old and your Organs aren't optimally functional anymore anyway. So, they've got to get him an Appointment at both Specialists within 5-7 Days, I'm waiting on Call Backs from both Offices now and squeeze the Appointments into an already full Calendar. *Le Sigh*
I have The Grandson's Caseworker coming Tomorrow, it's a Female, he's already talked to her by Phone I guess and seems eager for the visit. He is more receptive than his Mother for Services and to be Assigned those who will help him navigate The System. He knows it's a lot for me to and usually if you have a Caseworker Assigned to you, your chances are much better of getting Qualified for Services, Disability Benefits, expanded Treatments and such. The problem we've always had with The Grandson is becoz he has a very high IQ, at Genius level, his Intellectual abilities often make him appear too high Functional for Services. And tho' he's Schizophrenic, he's not Stupid, and the Condition has absolutely nothing to do with his Intellectual Capacity whatsoever. It's a trite Old Joke, but, he's Crazy, not Stupid. You can be Seriously Mentally Ill and very much impaired and disabled to where Quality of Life and Function suffers, yet have a very high IQ, they're not mutually exclusive.
Overall whose left in the Household now gets along very well with each other so I have fewer incidents. The Son and The Daughter had more that would upset them with each other and get into arguments, mostly Drinking was involved. Nobody else in the Household Drinks really, tho' The Young Prince will if he's at a Club, he won't here at Home and isn't a big Drinker either. And The Man, myself and Princess T don't Drink at all, and if someone is Drinking and begins to bother us, we'll simply say you've had too much to drink and have become annoying, so, we're disengaging until you sober up. I just walk away, coz a Drunk can be a Trigger for me, depending on how inebriated you are, is how tolerant or intolerant I will be with you. My whole Family know that, The Son and The Daughter in particular, they are Alcoholics, acknowledge they are, and try not to drink too much around me coz I'll get pissed off immediately.
If anyone has a Loved One or Friend who drinks too much and suffers from Alcoholism, you know how fucking annoying a Drunk is and how problematic their Drinking becomes in their Lives. I've ended Friendships with folks who like to drink too much and so I would end up not wanting to do anything Social with them if I knew they had access to Alcohol where ever it was. I would worry over them too much if I knew they would get behind the Wheel after drinking when out at a Club, Restaurant, Bar, Event, whatever... and I don't wanna be someone's Adult Babysitter like that, not my Day to Watch them. And, if they behave badly when drinking, I get too embarrassed to be around them in Public when they begin acting the Fool or like an Asshole.
So, anyway, quit doing that and everyone didn't mind that I don't Drink, so that was never the Issue. They all know Why I don't, not becoz I'm trying to be a Killjoy, or it's against my Religion, or something that makes people sometimes uncomfortable about Why you refrain. Becoz I have found People do ask Why? They seem to Need to know why you don't Drink? Are you a recovering Alcoholic perhaps? Nope. But, I am pretty sure I have enuf of an Addictive Personality I could end up being one. Mostly I'm a Control Freak and don't like the Feeling of not being fully in Control under the Influence of anything actually. But, that's never the reason I will always give. I tell them the Truth as to Why I chose not to be a Drinker. My Dad was Indigenous and Native Americans, for whatever biological reasons, don't handle the Fire Water well at all, not even a little bit! And a Drunk Indian can be a handful and very Unsettling, rest assured. And that's not being Racist or hyperbolic, it's an unfortunate Fact statistically and Demographically.
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