Going Back To Basics Instead Of Being All Extra

 So, The Man got to come Home this Afternoon, which in Real Time was Friday.  We had a poignant Good-Bye with his Medical Team, great folks looked after him, you couldn't ask for better Care.   We got to know them quite well in the span of just a few Days.  For some reason people feel comfortable Sharing their personal lives with us, so, you don't know how many people they've never done that level of transparency with and Trusted with that sensitive deeply Personal information?  One of the Nurses came to America from Mexico as a 2 Year Old, she's thinking of self deporting before Retirement now coz it's scaring her with the mass ICE roundups and Concentration Camps.  She's looked at Real Estate in Mexico already and hopes to Sell her Home here, tho' the Economic situation scares her too right now, if she'll even be able to find a Buyer?   A Home on the Beach in Mexico is only $150,000 and with her Nursing Skills she feels she is an Asset anywhere, so can easily find Work there.  America could lose a lot of good Career folks like her.

  Another Nurse was from Puerto Rico, he was a Type II Insulin Diabetic, lost 200 lbs. and now isn't a Diabetic anymore, on no Meds or Injections now.  Was on Ozempic and told me to be careful on it long term.  He's not sure how America is going to consider their American Territories and their Citizens like Puerto Rico?  Another Nurse has an Older Sister whose SMI and lives in San Francisco.  Her Sister is now 75 but has never been able to Work and has always been on SSI, and Subsidized Housing for the Seriously Mentally Ill.  She worries about people like her Sister losing Medicaid and SSI, what would they do if forsaken by our Government?  The Stories touched my Heart even tho' I've only recently met all of these highly skilled Medical Professionals who are as concerned as me about the Future of our Nation.  I didn't even bring up the Subject, but people clearly NEED to tell their Stories and give Voice to their Concerns.

Anyway, The Man is now on Three New Medications he'll have to take Daily due to his Stint, for about a Year at least.  The Pharmacy of the Hospital no longer Contracts with TriCare, which, isn't unusual, and Medicare Advantage Pharmacy Benefits can't be had if you have TriCare Military Earned Benefits unless you forfeit them!!!   Luckily, due to our Circumstances that those are the only Two Insurances we have, they gave us the Hospital's Discount, which brought the Cost down significantly to only $24 for all Three Meds.  *Whew*  We won't have refills there, but The Man and I will contact the VA and get them put on his Delivered Meds he's already on.   We may have to see his VA Primary Physician 1st, but the Hospital would like us to follow up with Dr. Kline and the Civilian Cardiologist, Dr. Singh, in a Week anyway.

He's happy to be Home and back in his Routine.  He had a nice Lunch at the Hospital of Grilled Salmon, Zucchini, and mashed Sweet Potato.  With Orange Sherbet and Apple Juice.   The Food there is pretty good for Hospital Food.  The Daughter made Chili for Dinner in the Crockpot and she also completely Organized my Kitchen Counters, which was badly needed and looks wonderful, tidy and Orderly now.   I've been Purging the Kitchen of what we don't use all of the time and making things we use all the time more accessible and visible for convenience.  We've got more to do, but, so far what's done looks really good.  At SAVERS we Scored a bunch of very expensive IKEA Glass Cannisters in Two Sizes that have pretty Bamboo Lids that Seal.  At IKEA they Sell for $45 each for the large ones and $10 each for the smaller ones.  I paid $3 for the large and $1.50 for the small each.  I got 6 large and 11 small, I can Organize a lot in them.   Mine are like the Cannisters and Lids pictured Above and Below, which seem to be the smaller Size.

I'm doing relatively good at Purging some of the Kitchen Collections of Retro Kitchenware and Starbucks Collectibles.  I have too many of each, but some things I'm quite attached to, so waffle some on how much of it to Let Go of?  My Vintage Jadeite for example, we no longer use, but I Love it and know it's hard to come by now at an affordable price point.  I'll have to revisit what I have and pare down later what I have accumulated Too Much of the same thing.  Right now I'm waffling too much on the Jadeite.   The Starbucks Mugs I'm doing great on Purging about half of what I have Collected over the Years, which, for now, is enuf downsizing of the Collection.   The Retro colorful Aluminum Tumblers, Pitchers, Dessert Bowls, I've also gotten rid of about half of what I have.   So, all of that will be Showroom bound eventually after I price it and have room for it to Resell. 

I'm replacing old Cannister Storage Containers with my new IKEA ones I just bought that match and Display Pantry items in better.  I'm paring down small Appliances, keeping only the ones we use all the time, same with Pots, Pans, Utensils.   Most of that will be Donated so will be gone in one fell swoop to a Charity Shop.   Only Vintage and Collectibles with Value will be put up for Resale.   Going thru things with consistency, with The Daughter's Help has been invaluable to the Downsizing Process.  It's easier if I have an Accountability Partner whose more Objective about what I have an abundance of and can Let Go of more of.  She's aware I have some Attachments but that I am Detaching more than usual, so, when I'm in the Mood to Let Go, we kick it into overdrive before I can change my Mind or begin to waffle and be indecisive or too Sentimental.  On a Practical Note I know I don't NEED so much of it and won't be utilizing it for any practical purposes.

Those of you who Collect understand better how difficult it can be to part with a Lifetime of Objects you've spent so many Years acquiring piece by piece.  And, what I do Let Go of I know someone seeking it will be Jazzed to procure an Instant Collection in one place.  They won't have to spend Years procuring it.   Some I do Sell in Sets, some Individually.  I've had good Luck with Selling Vintage Kitchenware items, people do still want a Retro looking Real Deal Kitchen.  Especially the Young Retro Kids who Live it 24-7 and 365 in how they Dress and Decorate their Homes in Authentic Mid-Century Modern items.  I've Sold in bulk to some of those Young People and know they appreciate what they're Buying and living out their Retro Fantasy.

The Son and his Friend watched a Post Apocalyptic Zombie Horror Movie on PLUTO TV with me and then they went to the Theater to watch a new Release of that one that is a Series, done over 20 Years after the Original of the Trilogy of it.  The Original was called "28 Days Later" {2003} starring Cillian Murphy.  The Middle of the Trilogy was called "28 Weeks Later" {2007} starring Jeremy Renner.  The 3rd being "28 Years Later" {2024} starring Ralph Fiennes... which is the one they went to see at the Movie Theater.  There is a Fourth one Scheduled for Release in 2026 called "28 Years Later: The Bone Temple" and was filmed back to back with the 3rd of the Series and should have the same Cast.  I liked the 1st one and haven't seen any of the others yet.   Cillian Murphy is supposed to be Cast in the 4th of the Series again reprising his Original Role of Jim, I hope so.

We get Irrigation Today but our Rotation isn't bad, it's an Afternoon one this time.   Mando and The Daughter have been doing it for us anyway so that I don't have to, and maintaining the Yardwork, so I've not had to Hire anyone anymore to do it.  That's Helpful to the ole Budget, even tho' our Neighbors always gave me a good price to do it all these Years.  Now both Sons are battling Cancer and taking care of their own Elderly Parents and their Property, so couldn't do it anymore for us.  My Friend in Texas has set up a Go Fund Me Page to pay for her Funeral when the time comes.  When I saw it on Social Media Feed I thought she'd already Died and the Youngest Daughter was scrambling to afford the Funeral!!!  Since she's always been on SSI she never had the Money to prepay for a Funeral.  Which, makes sense now, I was relieved she hadn't already Passed, even tho' her Cancer is an aggressive and fast one.  And, it's traveled everywhere now thruout her Body.

 And tho' she has Five grown Kids and one grown Grandson, her Youngest Daughter told me No, Aunt Dawn, Mom just wants to take care of this in advance.  Coz none of the other Four Siblings or Grandson wants to chip in to pay for final expenses and she doesn't want the Youngest to be burdened with the whole Cost!  The Youngest Daughter is already doing all the Caregiving too without any Help from the Siblings, so my Friend is upset with the rest of her whole Family right now, as is the Youngest Daughter.  I'd had one of the Older Daughters visit us recently when she came to Arizona for the Funeral of a Friend's Dad, and brought Three Kids with her, so I'm thinking the Money may have been more wisely spent helping her own Family out and being there for her Mom and Sister?   I never know the present internal dynamics even tho' I'm close with the Family, theirs is a very complex dynamic that is Mercurial, is the best way I can describe it in a Word.

Their Family has always had a lot of internal Drama and I've known them for Decades.  So, I can't say it was a Surprise that even now, there's strife among them all, during a time they should be pulling together and putting bullshit aside between them.   I don't understand that since our Family has always been a Circle The Wagons type and most especially when up against any Crisis, we got each other's Backs and are Ride Or Die.  Even when The Son and The Daughter were struggling with serious Substance Abuse, if there was a Crisis and I needed them, they'd even show up High to help me rather than be conspicuous by their absence when needed.   When I Moved from The Villa McManse for example, The Son did most of the heavy work and rallied all of his Friends to Help me.  And I knew he was heavily Using at the time, but, he didn't forsake us, as messed up as he was in his own personal life.  

My shit was Wrapped real funny, since he did it under the influence and we laughed about that much later, Gallow's Humor Style, when he got Clean and has stayed Clean now for Years.  In Reality it was tragic, the Condition he was in at the time, and I worried I could lose him to The Streets, he looked terrible and was really strung out.   But, when I needed him he was there on the spot and made it happen, even all fucked up.  The Daughter, when unwrapping things, was like, Mom, whatssup with this, and I would tell her, well, your Brother was real High, probably Drunk too, and looked like Death Warmed Over, so...   She understands, she's a Recovering Addict too and has been Clean for Years now as well.  But, Addiction is a Fight Daily and Sobriety fragile, so they have to stay on it.  My Friend's Kids should put aside their differences and be there for their Mom in Unity of Purpose and make her final Days as meaningful and pleasant as they're able.  Since they consider me "Aunt" Dawn I've told that to the Three I'm closest to.   

 

The "Lost" Son, is such a Lost Cause at this point it would probably be more harmful for the Family right now to have him around at all, and especially with the added stress and strain of the Dying Mother.  He's reached out to me but I can't risk contact with him since our Family knows he's still in The Life.  We don't want that influence around us at all, we must keep a Zero Tolerance Policy and anyone still Using has to be cut off, no exceptions.  My Friend's Oldest Daughter I've never known coz she was raised by a Wealthy Aunt in the Hamptons and works for the CIA.  But I would think she has the means to help with Funeral Expenses and it's just Sad she'd allow her Mom's Funeral to be covered by Go Fund Me Charitable Contributions instead!!!   Her Mom is SMI and struggled with Substance Abuse herself.  When she was Clean and Sober she and I were always super close, when she was Using we were not.  So, I'm not without Sympathy for her Children and am not judgmental about whatever Dynamic causes the complexities for them all, it's a LOT.

When the Older Daughter was here we talked candidly about it all in person.  I've talked candidly with the Youngest Daughter via Social Media Private Messenger and on the Phone about it all too.  If I could Mediate and Moderate between those who could be swayed, I'll do it for the sake of my Friend, she needs them to be focused on what matters right now.  The Younger Daughter told me the Docs keep her Mom very highly Medicated now to keep her Pain Free.  Her Mom has had a very long History of Prescription Drug Abuse coz Shrinks and Pain Management Docs often handed that shit out like Tic Tacs, and she'd often abuse her Medications off and on.   I told her Daughter, now it really doesn't matter my Dear, if it stops her suffering, so be it at this point.  Even her Treatments aren't meant to try to put her in Remission, they waited too long and didn't catch any of it in time.  She told me she's Dying and at this point she wants to, so if it hastens a final Rest for her, she seems at Peace with it.  It's all quite Heavy and Sad for any Family to struggle thru, even a functional one, let alone a dysfunctional one.

I just Wish they still lived in Arizona so I could be a Present Help, their Mom always Behaved for me, even when she was quite unraveled.  They'd call me and I'd show up, my Friend is like a Sister to me and she's been there for me during Crisis as well and would always show up.   She's had significant Issues, but she's always been a Ride Or Die Friend and I have been to her as well.  So, it's very hard to know she's going thru all this and we can't be close enuf in proximity to Ride it thru together.  Her Family knows we're going thru our own Health Crisis and both Families have a Full Dance Card really right now.   Many Families I know are as well, in many ways it's been the Worst of Times for so many Dear Friends of ours, so, we've not been The Lone Ranger in our situation battling The Issues Of Life.   Enuf of that Heaviness... Moving On...

The Man is doing well now he's Home, I think his Recovery from Surgery No. One is going as planned.  I'll be calling his Primary Doc, his Cardiologist and the VA Pharmacy on Monday to coordinate everything he'll need for Follow-up with his Care, his Meds, and his 2nd Surgery.  Yes, I have concerns about Surgery No. Two coz there's always risk factors and his are heightened, but, it's not Elective, it's absolutely necessary so we'll have to get it done.  The risks of not doing it being way higher.   They made us Promise to do all his Follow-Up, since, last Year he didn't, but, I blame that on lack of adequate communication, especially with me, I didn't even know he had any, I thought they'd cut him loose from the Specialists and just doing Follow-Up with his Primary at the VA.   My Cardiologist and Neurologist didn't need to see me anymore, so, I assumed it was the same for him since they never contacted us again or scheduled any further Appointments. 

 

All Kiddos Today are spending time with their Boyfriends or Girlfriend, so I have a House full of Young People.  They're doing all the Cooking and Cleaning, and Serving The Man and I, so, it's beneficial to have extra Hands.   I think The Son and his Friend have now begun to be more than Friends, I'm sensing she always had a Crush on him even when they were Teenagers.   She's a good match for him since she doesn't Drink, doesn't Smoke, is Clean Living and Holistic about her ways, so she and I get along and have much in Common.  He joked that she's like a Mini Me, she's Spiritual in ways I also am, and she utilizes Tribal Medicine and understands our ways, since, she grew up like I grew up, even tho' she's of a Younger Generation than mine.  Not much has changed in Tribal Cultures actually, so even Indigenous of my Kids and Grandkids Ages often have been Raised similarly to their Elders.   There isn't as much of a Generation Gap in Indigenous Tribal Culture that there is in other Western Culture.

Mando is Hispanic and Mexican American, The Daughter totally understands Hispanic Culture, she's lived in Mexico almost Two Decades and prefers the Culture of Mexico to the Culture of America.   She'd rather live in Mexico permanently, but, with us getting Older and having more Need for all our Kiddos to be here for us, she decided to come back.   She just wished we'd been able to get her Three Mexican Born Children here too.  But that's an ongoing Immigration complication that won't get resolved during this highly Racist Administration and I wouldn't risk the safety and well being of my Grandchildren due to it either.  None of the Three of them speaks or understands English and tho' they have an American Parent means nothing to this Administration.   I find it Ironic that a President who had Immigrant Grandparents and Immigrant Wives, and Children by Immigrant Women, is so Anti-Immigrant.  Of coarse we all know the WHY, it's all about Ethnicity, you don't see ICE rounding up and Kidnapping White folks and putting them in Concentration Camps!

The Son's Friend was joking about how most Americans have never even seen or met enough Indigenous to even recognize a First Nation's Person and just assume they're Mexicans or some other Foreign Ethnic Group.  So, she said she's been told to go back to where she came from by some Racist folks, and then she responds, I am where I came from, I'm Navajo.  Clearly, you're the Ancestors of people who didn't come from here.  *LOL*    As many Immigrants as we met at the Hospital who work there, which is the majority of the Staffing, both Doctors, Nurses, and other Support Staff, if all of them left America, our Healthcare System would be up Shit's Creek!   That includes our Assisted Living, Nursing Homes, Group Homes and Rehab Centers.  Every single one of those Workers adds Value to the American Economy and is doing important Work here.   The Son said in The Trades it's the same, if they didn't have Immigrants filling the Positions, they'd be up Shit's Creek too and already can't find enuf Skilled Labor in The Trades.

The Daughter and I have worked all Morning on Organizing more of the Kitchen stuff, we made great progress coz I Let Go of a lot of stuff.  I'm keeping what we use a lot of and reluctantly Selling Off what we don't.  Except for my Jadeite, I've been relentless about Purging Retro Kitchen items I just no longer use and don't have Room to Display in this Home.  We had Three Kitchens in the Main House of the Historic Home and a Kitchen in the Carriage House Art Studio Cottage conversion.  We had an enormous Kitchen at the Villa McManse, here, we have One normal sized Kitchen with no Display Space in it.  When it was built you just didn't have Display Space in Kitchens like Modern Builds now do for an Aesthetic Element.  Back when Vintage Homes were built, Kitchens and Bathrooms were very Utilitarian exclusively.  Nothing Wrong with that and I'm going back to it, nothing at all Wrong with going back to Basics instead of being all Extra.

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Conversion from being Extra to being Basic is a Process... Dawn... The Bohemian