The Blog Post Title Hook pretty much says it all, about a Weeks worth of Stress was packed into a single Day! The Man is Hospitalized again, I spent 'til 1:00 in the Morning in the ER with him after he got stung by a Bee. He's not allergic to Bee Stings per se, but he's got a Bad Heart and the adrenalin from having been Stung made him begin to be short of breath and have Chest pain, so, we had to err on the side of caution. They ran a bunch of tests and said his lingering Heart Issues need him to be seeing a Cardiologist again, so, Dr. Singh will be back in the picture. He may not need a Procedure yet, we'll wait and see, but, he's still Hospitalized at the Hospital down the Road a bit, so, close to Home. Tests revealed some Issues.
It is always an Ordeal taking him to see any Docs coz he makes things up and gets confused due to the Dementia and TBI. He was telling them he'd had Quadruple Bypass Surgery, which, he hadn't, but he'd been told last Week his Younger Brother had! So, I couldn't convince him that it wasn't him, it was the Brother! He's convinced it was himself. *Le Sigh* He has had Double Bypass Surgery many, many Years ago tho'. Then he was telling them he's allergic to Bees, but, that's me, not him. So, I told them he's got so much going on that he can't always remember what all he's had done and gets mixed up with what the rest of the Family has had in the way of Medical Emergencies. Since he's in his 70's the Doc was fine with that explanation and then began consulting me to get more accurate information. *Whew*
He also won't remember what they tell him so I have to make sure they tell me too. But, he's resting fine and in good Spirits, he's behaving for the Staff, he has a good Team there working with him on the Cardiac Unit. While all this was going on in the wee Hours of a Tuesday Morning, the Stress of what was happening to Grandpa was tanking Princess T's Health, so, she couldn't Breathe. I think it was her Respiratory along with a Panic Attack, so at Four in the Morning I was giving her a Breathing Treatment and by 6:00 in the Morning we were calling her in Sick from Work. So, I got a Sick Teenager at Home too and she still doesn't feel good and it's Evening now. I've had about Two Hours Sleep, good thing I'm Bipolar and on a Manic Bender right now. *LOL*
To Top Off the Day I got an Emergency Call from The Son that the damned Car broke down again, this time near his Work, clear across the Valley, and a Serpentine Belt had worn and needed replacement. One of his Friends from Work came to look at it and said it would limp him Home where he could replace it here with Mando's help, so, the Guys did that. *Whew* At least he got it Home and a huge Monsoon Storm is brewing and the Sky looks like something from The Wizard Of Oz, so, we'll get hammered Tonight. I got my Utility Bill and almost had a Stroke at how high it was this Month... so I had to set up a Payment Plan with SRP, which, strains an already tight Budget. *Le Sigh*
There's a Moratorium on Utilities until September, so they can't shut them off due to Extreme Heat. By then I'll be caught back up and the Utilities should go down considerably after Summer too. I turned our Thermostats down by 2 Degrees to conserve more. We're already using considerably less per Month than the past Two Years coz of me tightening our Belts and using less Energy, but, you can only do so much when its 111-120 most Days all Summer long now. *Le Sigh* I stopped by the Antique Mall and was relieved I had a solid ending to the last Pay Period which means I won't owe the Mall and will get another paltry Check, but, a Check nonetheless. *Whew*
My Friends Crazy Ed and Jeff were there, they both always make me Laugh, which, I needed that and they could tell. Crazy Ed said he likes how I tell my Stories even when Life is going to shit, becoz I make it sound Funny even tho' clearly it's no Laughing matter, well, unless you got Dark Gallow's Humor like us. *LOL* And at least my Doc Appointment had gone Well, she was Okay with my slow but steady progress in the right direction. Baby Steps. She didn't order Labs coz I haven't been on the Ozempic that long yet and she's increasing my dosage now we know I can tolerate it well. So, I don't see her for Four Months now and we'll then see where I'm at. I'm just at the cusp of getting below 200 Lbs. which is a Short Term Goal. My Goal Weight being 157-160 as the Long Term Goal. I went to the Gym since I wasn't Caregiving and did an Hour's Workout.
There were so many Seniors there, it was like they were having a Rally or something! *LOL* Several Old Ladies came up and said pleasantries to me, but I wasn't in the Head Space to make New Friends. I got too much going on right now that his Heavy. So I was Politely Cordial but not encouraging. One Lady ordered what I was eating, since I had Breakfast at their Cafe' and she liked how it looked and used it as an opening to talk to me about what is that? *LOL* Plus, I could overhead the slew of conversations among the Seniors, and... yeah... No... not my Crowd or my Tribe. *LOL and Winks* I'm not being mean Spirited, I just instinctively know when another Senior would be my kind of Kindred Spirit... and when they most def would NOT. *Smiles* There was a lot of Gossip going on and I don't indulge or engage in Gossip. I really don't have Time to be concerned about what other folks are doing in order to have them be a primary Topic of my Conversations actually, Positively or Negatively. Besides, I'm all Friended Up... as The Son and I like to say. *Winks*
And the Friends I do have, are all Amazing and are Kindred Spirits and we're on the same frequency and wave length as each other and so there's never Drama or Headaches going on between any of us and that's how I likes it. *Winks* In fact, I think my Friends ROCK, both the ones in Real Life and the ones here in The Land Of Blog. You all know who you are. Above is my Industry Friend Kendra who just went on a Road Trip to Kansas City, Missouri to see Friends there. She's one of those Friends of mine that if we go out anywhere together we'd both be seeing how much Fun we could have without getting Arrested. *Winks* We're considered incorrigibles by the rest of our Friends. And... they could be Right!? *Bwahahahaha and Winks* Below is my Industry Friend Sarah, who always looks like she just stepped off a 1950's Pinup Girl Calendar, she Lives it 24-7 and 365, and she's such Fun too. Sarah is part of the Crazy Gal Club as we like to call all us Bipolars who are relatively High Functional. *LMAO* We're rather like the Candy Bar Almond Joy & Mounds, Sometimes we feel like a Nut, sometimes we don't. *Winks*
On another Positive Note The Young Prince called and told me he doesn't plan to leave New Mexico with any urgency now coz his Caseworker just told him he Qualifies for a Pell Grant to not only get his GED at no Cost, but also go to College at no Cost to get his Associates. He wants to start doing Computer Programming again and building Programs and being a Fixer for Program Problems. He talked to his Mom for over an Hour too, which is really, really Rare for Two Schizophrenics to have that much personal interaction and stick with a Single Alter for the whole Phone Call. So, it was really Special and it made her Cry when she got off the Phone coz "they've" never talked that long to her before ever! And, she's never been able to hold a lucid Conversation that long either and make a connection so it made her feel like she's making great Progress as well Mentally. I think they both have, it was quite Moving for me too. Tho' I can't hold a Conversation over a Phone that long and The Young Prince knows it and let me off the Hook by continuing it with Mom. *LOL* The ADHD kicks in and I can't stay Focused and start drifting away. *Bwahahaha*
I noticed the last Two Phone Calls he's gone Long, which is super Rare for any of "them", none of "their" Alters usually wants to talk to you more than a few Minutes tops usually, and no "one" stays Dominant long. Anyway, he figures he can mostly work from Home and be as Weird as he is so long as he is Smart Enuf to Save Companies Money and make them Money... he's Right about that. He's built Computer Programs and been a really good Hacker since he was Nine Years Old, it's like a Game to him, it's why he got kicked out of his last Alternative School for Hacking into their Program and Enhancing it for them since they'd been lamenting they couldn't afford the Thousands to have it Enhanced. Genius Boy then secretly hacked into it and did the Enhancements for Free. But, that's a Federal Offense so we had the Feds at his School and then everyone was shitting Kittens about the Thousands they didn't have to fix what he'd done. So I told him to fix it, and he did in like 5 Minutes and said, "Wow, someone charges Thousands to do something that Easy?" *LOL*
He didn't catch Federal Charges coz he was only a barely turned 14 Year Old Genius Schizophrenic Special Needs Student and the Agent could see no malice had been intended. He genuinely thought he'd done a good thing. And after that he wasn't allowed to use a computer lest he get in more trouble inadvertently, but, I always knew he was Genius enuf to do great things one day with Technology. Tho' Seriously Mentally Ill enuf most Companies won't hire him, not even at McDonalds. He's excited about AI for different reasons that are similar to why the rest of us are scared about it. He said, "It's gonna be great Gramma, AI is gonna fuck things up so bad and so fast they'll desperately need someone to be Smarter than the Machines to run damage control behind them! And that's gonna be a Fun Challenge to outsmart the Machines!" Yeah, that's how his Beautiful Mind Works. *LOL*
Well, Ole' Elon made $420 Billion Plus being a Genius Weirdo, so... I have no Doubt our Genius Weirdo might make some serious Bank doing his own Thing if they set his Weirdness Free to conquer Tech Problems? He doesn't just Think Outside of the Box, he's never been in the Box to begin with or in close proximity to the Box ever in his Life! He's so way Outside The Box most people can't even fathom what the Hell he's even talking about most of the time, it's way over their Heads. He was Smarter than me when he was Two, I kid you not. When he gets into his Deep discussions I just Nod, but I can't contribute a damned Intelligent sounding thing to add to that conversation! And I'm not a Stupid Woman, but, my IQ clearly is nowhere near his. Tho' he likes to boost my Ego some by saying I've got Great Street Smarts and Superb Intuition. *LOL* Being Intuitive and having good Instincts is handy.
Speaking of Instincts and Street Smarts, Above is one of the rare pixs I have of Princess T's Dad, and he's been trying to get in touch with us, but my Instincts are telling me to keep blocking him. I used to be very close to him, but some folks you have to Let Go of. Along with one of The Sons of my BFF whose Dying of Cancer and she's Hospitalized again, whose been blowing up my Phone and Social Media trying to make contact too, and I've blocked. Three of her Five Kids I'm okay with having Contact with, but not that Son and I have my reasons. And he considers me Aunt Dawn and so it's hard to have Tough Love, but, it's necessary, he's in The Life... as is my Ex-SIL, and anyone deep in The Life, forget about it, their Drama spills over into other folk's lives and it can be really risky. My Kiddos got out of The Life and know it well enuf to still have the Streets Talking to them about anyone and everyone still of The Streets. So, we're not "New" and you won't Shine us On, if you're still involved with some shit, we have our reliable Sources.
They take risks I'm not willing to take and that's just how it is. My wayward Youth is behind me and I Learned much from it, and I haven't gotten so Old I forget what it was like to be Young and fuck up. My Friend has enuf she's Dealing with that I can't tell her I'm blocking her Oldest Son, she doesn't need to know. I've known all her Kiddos since they were Littles and they're like Nieces and Nephews to me and I deeply Care about all of them and Love them. I've watched them grow up, and I've watched when they fuck up, I want the best for all of them. He's sent me Pixs, like the one Above, to try to pretend he's taking better Care of himself, to prove to me and my Family that he's doing good and is fit, healthy and acting rational, but The Streets say otherwise. And I'm rough around the Edges myself, so I don't expect anyone I know to be Angelic, but, I have Boundaries and I stick to them.
And some folks have crossed those Boundaries and think our Love for them will override our better Judgment, it won't. Talk to the Hand, not interested in being Fed Lines and Lies. If you can't keep it 100%, I don't Trust you, period. And if any of you has had a Loved One who cannot be Trusted, or fails to Earn Back Trust, you know what I mean and how hard it is to sever Contact, for everyone's sake. And, as for the Ex-SIL, all his Children he's had with The Daughter, and also The Daughter, know how I feel about Contact with him at the present time and Respect that decision. He's in too Deep for me. The Son and The Daughter knew my Friend's Son suddenly started wanting to get together with us, after all these Years, coz he's burned the Bridges with his own Family... so, not happening. I don't know how Deep he's in, but suspect, rolling pretty Deep, too Deep for me. His Younger Brother turned Life around, and kept it together for over Two Years now, so, he's Earned back some Trust. I'm delighted he's doing so well and can be a present Help to his Younger Sister whose the Primary Caregiver now of their Dying Mom, who is like a Sister to me and has been a Best Friend for Decades now.
I Wish all of her Kids could have gotten it together and held it down so she could Live to see that, but, Four out of Five ain't bad, it's a Huge Blessing in fact. It's not as if my Friend got it together and held it down either, she didn't, which is why in later Years our Friendship was tense becoz I knew she was backsliding. She knew my Zero Tolerance Policy for Bad Decisions being made on a consistent basis, and she really only very recently got another Chance... before I knew she was Dying... so I'm glad I did give her that Chance some Months ago, not knowing she was going to get so Sick so fast. And the Lost One of hers, still mebbe could some day turn his Life around too? She probably won't see it, sadly. But, she won't see his possible demise either, which is a Blessing... I was glad Saint Maria didn't Live to see her Son's potential demise either. My Instincts tell me both Men might not make it... I Hope I'm Wrong and Pray their decisions don't catch up to them? I prefer Happy Endings.
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But we all know not every Ending is a Happy One, that's just Life... Dawn... The Bohemian
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