Growing Old Disgracefully And Meltdowns

 I had a whole Post done and deleted it, on Purpose... sometimes I just need to bang something out that's on my Mind, but no Need to Publish it.  It was one of THOSE Posts.  I went to the Discount Grocer and got $10 Off with my Coupon plus a 15% Senior Discount on top of that, so quite a Savings.  We're stocked up on Non-Perishable Essentials now.  The only thing they didn't have that I needed was Wild Bird Seed at a price point I'd pay.  They only had the very expensive kind and I wasn't paying that for Wild Bird Feeding.  I often get them Gourmet Seed if it's on a Sale, otherwise they get the Cheaper stuff.  *Smiles*  Well, it's the 1st of August already in Real Time.  We have Three Birthdays, mine, The Young Prince's, and his Female Cousin, whose a Year Younger than he is, they will be 26 {him} and 25 {her}.  All the Grandkids are getting pretty Old now, half are already Middle Aged, how did that happen!?!   Me, I'm intent on Growing Old Disgracefully and with no Apologies for it.  *LOL*

I stocked up on those individual bottled servings of different Fruit flavored blended Ocean Spray Cranberry Drinks while the Discount Grocer still had them.  They are delicious, refreshing, and The Man will drink those, good for his Kidneys.  It was already 113 at Noon, Toasty!!!  So, except to pick up Princess T, I won't be going out in it anymore Today.  Danae already brought The Daughter Home coz I had a fit about the condition of the 5th Wheel, so they both set to Cleaning it.  I told her we're not doing that level of Crazy, it has to be Safe, Clean and Sanitary or she can't stay in it anymore.  I don't want it looking like she's gone so Off the Rails that she requires Involuntary Institutionalization.  I hated to ask him, but The Son had to help me in there and our Neighbor Rob heard my Meltdown about it!

The Son had put on Gloves and wrapped a Towel around his Mouth and Nose, he said he really needed a Hazmat Suit... yeah... it was Mental.  I hadn't realized she's unraveled in the 3 Days I hadn't been in there!  It was Fine only 3 Days prior!   Think of one of the worse Episodes you've seen of Hoarders... and... incapsulate it in the square footage of a 5th Wheel, condensed version of Hoarders most Extreme Episodes.  He took Pixs coz he told his Sister, next time it's like this, even if Mom doesn't, I'm calling the Crisis Mental Health Hotline to come get you!   Coz clearly you're NOT Okay and you need Help!  Princess T even agreed with her Uncle, that her Mom and her Brother could likely end up in a Mental Institution permanently one day.  She said her Uncle has never been that level of Crazy Mentally, and even when he was Using... and that is The Truth.

Now, I'm sure she and Danae whipped it into Shape coz Danae is a good Friend to her and understood my Concerns and why I was so Upset.  I mostly get Mad coz it's Fear in Disguise, when I see that Three out of the Six of us here are so unraveled half the time, that Caregiving is Extreme and I worry about how they'll fare in the not so distant Future?  The Man, The Daughter, and The Young Prince... are Far Side of Caregiving when they're Off the Rails with their Conditions.  And... that's just a LOT to Manage or to Emotionally Process sometimes.   The Son actually threw up coz he said the Odor, plus how concerned he was about his Sister being oblivious it was that Bad, just made him Physically Ill.  He's been in Mental Institutions and said he doesn't like to think his Sister and his Nephew are like the worst Residents in those Facilities.  But, they can be.

The irony being, she had been over at Old Jason's Home all Day Cleaning and Sanitizing his Living Space, and even doing ours here in the Main House, while hers was like that!!!  I can't even wrap my Mind around it actually.   So, I had the Come To Jesus Talk with her, much like I'd done with her Son, about we have to do Quality Control and Inspections more often to ensure it doesn't ever get that Bad again for either of them.  I'm the Caregiver and tho' I wanna Respect their Privacy as Adults who have a Private Living Space here, I can't let it go unchecked often, clearly.  And since that had happened in less than 3 Days, I may have to do a Welfare Check on each of them every other Day and Inspect their Spaces for adequate Safety and Sanitation concerns?  Huge Le Sigh.  She's in a Good Head Space and Mood right now, she took it Well actually, tho' to her it "Wasn't THAT Bad...", which Speaks Volumes right there!!!  Coz, it FUCKING WAS!!!

Anyway, now she's happily eating Carne Asada Fries that her Brother bought for them both.  She had me Inspect the 5th Wheel, she'd miraculously transformed it.  Sanitary and Safe now.  *Whew*  I'd brought Home a little Chicken Snack Wrap from SONIC for The Man.  Being out in the Heat killed my Appetite completely, I just kept well hydrated.   I do Need to Price more Inventory to take in, mostly Smalls that Sell well like the Pokemon Cards and other Small Toy Collectibles.   I can Price them all Inside in Climate Control, just have to get motivated enuf to do it.  And, I must Confess, that isn't happening right now.  *LOL*   Yes, for the Weekend Sales I should knuckle down and get more Priced and in there, coz Sales have been abysmal this Pay Period again.  It's like we have a 2-Week Pay Period every other one that is Strong, and every other one that is Weak.  I should call Today and get my Total since it's the very last Day of the Pay Period and by 9:00 p.m. Tonight {a Saturday in Real Time}, it's a Wrap for this one.  I will have some Comped Space Rent this time to help a bit to defer Overhead Costs

I have to put away the Two Banana Boxes full of Groceries I just bought at the Discount Grocer.  The Ocean Spray Drinks come in 18 and 24 Pacs so we just stacked those.  We had gotten down to just one 24 Pac left so I was glad they still had them in Stock.  With Six in the Household, and any Guests, a 24 Pac doesn't last long of liquid Refreshments when it's over 110 every Day now and creeping closer to 120 actually!!!  I'm so glad we got the New Fridge just in time, so it functions well and makes 10 Lbs. of Ice Daily and refills a full Pitcher of Ice Water in the Inside Door as well.  Those were Features that were a Must Have, along with that Middle Pull Out Drawer that we keep Bottled and Canned drinks in so you don't have to open a Door of the Fridge to get one.  I LOVE that Feature.  I'm happy that the whole Family are keeping everything nice in that New Fridge too, it's a thing of Beauty when it's so Organized and Orderly.  No Waste happens and nothing is 'hidden' to where you forget it's even in there.  *LOL*

I have Six Glass Dairy Milk Bottles to turn in for Credit at "Sprouts".  So I will be going there next to pick up some Perishables and use that Credit, which is around $2-$3 per Bottle that were a Deposit.  Only half of them were mine, The Daughter brings Home any she finds or people give her. Knowing that you get a Deposit back if you return them, coz Danzeisen Dairy Locally reuses their Glass Bottles so would prefer you don't just throw them away.   And often they have Specialty Bottle Designs Screen Printed on their Bottles for Special Occasions, like the 250th Birthday, so they are Collectible too.  I put those Foam little Balls in those so it looks like faux Milk and then Sell them at the Antique Mall, coz I can get way more as a Collectible than for a Deposit by taking it back.  I had some with Local Iconic Rock Star Alice Coopers Face on them, and some with Spring Wildflowers printed on the Glass too.  I have an assortment of the 3 Sizes, the Gallon, Quart and small Cream Bottles.  I Keep all my Lids.

Princess T thought she'd be getting off Work earlier but hasn't called yet, so I don't think that's happening, she'll be bummed too.  She has Sundays and Mondays off, so looks forward to getting out of there earlier on a Saturday.   The Son had gone to "Talking Stick Resort" Casino on the Rez to see a Concert recently, I don't know which one it was.  I've not used any of the Arizona Reservation Casinos or Resorts, tho' I did walk around one to see if it's similar to Vegas, it is.  We have a lot of them here coz we have a lot of Reservations.  So, if you're a Gambler there is no Need to go to Vegas and your Odds at these Casinos I hear are far better for Winning.   I'm not a Gambler so I don't Care, we mostly went to Vegas and got a Time Share there for 20 Years back in the 1980's and 1990's becoz we liked to visit Friends Stationed at the Military Base there and eat at the Buffets and watch some Shows.  Three Days of Vegas is all I can ever Stomach, no Appeal longer than that.  Our Time Share was for a Week at a time but we usually stayed 3 Days.

We had our Time Share at the SAHARA coz back in the 1980's it was the only Debt Free Casino on The Strip and Freemont Street had gone real Seedy, it had been better in the 1970's on Freemont Street.  Back in the 1970's I knew a lot of Made Men who were Italians and Sicilians here in Phoenix who were part Owners of some of the Older Casinos there like the "4 Queens" and "The Golden Nugget".  Of coarse in the 1970's Vegas, Phoenix and Tucson were all Mobbed Up Cities and everyone knew this and which Mafia Families ran each.   My Visits to Vegas were enjoyable tho' every time I ever went, so no complaints at all.  The Man and I Eloped and actually got Married there at the Old "Silver Bells" Wedding Chapel on The Strip.  Some Crazy Memories of Vegas too.  *Winks*  And when they made it Family Friendly for a Minute, in the late 1980's to early 1990's, which really was a Big Mistake for Vegas, we took our Kids, who were Children back then.  

I remember The Son was about 3 Years Old the 1st time we went as a Family and he didn't Care about the Kid Friendly Themes of "Excalibur" and "Treasure Island", he was all about the Pretty Girls in the Scanty Outfits!  *LOL*   Who thought he was just Precious and would Pose with him for Pixs and he'd have this shit-eating Grin on his Face flanked by Two or more Hawt scantily clad Showgirls.  *LMAOROTF*  And his Sister was 7 and she thought some of the Stunt Men at "Treasure Island" were Handsome, so got them to pose with her too!  *LOL*   Yeah, we had incorrigible Kids for sure, The Man said.  *Smiles, he wasn't Wrong!*  Back then "MGM Grand", "Luxor", "El Mirage", "Circus Circus", "Venetian", appealed to Families visiting too, so we'd hit all of those and do the Theme Parks with the Kiddos.   Above is me and my Brother, I was Two and a Half, he was just a few Months Old, mebbe 6 Month, and Weighed more than me!  *LOL*  He was Peaches & Cream Complexion like our Mom and with Blue Black Hair like both our Parents, I was very Swarthy like our Dad but Light Hair and Eyes.

 But, back to Vintage Vegas... they were tearing down and Closing many of the Older Casinos back then like "Sands", "El Rancho", "Aladdin", "Dunes", "Landmark", and much later and more recently... "Tropicana" and "Riviera".  We were there when they were shooting the Nicolas Cage Movie "Con Air" {1997}, but they must have shot it in 1996 coz they imploded the Casino in November of 1996 and the Movie didn't come out 'til the next Year.  We saw it when the Plane was sticking out of "The Sands", they were apparently shooting the Movie and I remember getting some Pixs from across the Street and while the Casino was still Standing but with that Plane sticking out of the Lobby.   I was Saddened that so many Iconic Historic Casinos were Razed, but Vegas is all about Modernity and the next Best Thing and making Money.  Most Visitors could Care Less about it's History or the Preservation of it really.  They'll instead Complain about how "Dated" a Historic Accommodation is.  Duh.  Fucking Idiots.  Book something Modern then Fool!!!

I must say it is a Pet Peeve of mine to Read some Idiot's YELP Review where they Booked something in a Historic or Vintage Building and then Complained it was "Dated".   If the Hotel was say, built in 1911, or the Casino in 1946, the Charm of it will be that they didn't molest it and call it a "Restoration", by Modernizing the damned thing to Death and ruining it.  If I want Modern digs, I'll fucking Rent a Modern place, becoz I'm not an Imbecile and I have realistic expectations of what I'm getting!!!  I dunno, there's a lot of Stupid out there in Public and you can't Fix Stupid, and Ignorance isn't Bliss, it's just Ignorance.   Mini Rant now over.  *Winks and Smiles*   You can't change how some people just are and learning to co-exist with the ones who are Triggering in their behaviors is Life's Challenge for us all.  I'm sure I drive some people Nuts too with what I do or say that is their Pet Peeve.  *Winks*

Above, a Road Trip taken to Disneyland, back in the 1970's.  I went with Three Male G.I. Friends of mine who were Stationed at Luke AFB, one of which became a Lifetime Friend and we remained Besties, he only Passed Away last Month and I really Miss Mike.   Mike had grown up in Cali, so wanted to show us all the Sights, since the Three of us had never been to any of them before.  This was long before my Brother moved to Cali and has remained there ever since.  The other Two Friends, I lost Touch with over the Years, when they got Re-Assigned to other Bases.  Except Al, pictured with me here, who I did manage to re-connect with via FB many Years later, coz he stayed in Touch with our mutual Friend Mike.   But now he's dropped off FB and frankly, I don't know if he's still among the Living or not?  He got to go to Bora Bora many times, it's still No. One on my Bucket List and he'd taunt me with Pixs of him in Bora Bora and other Exotic Locales living the Good Life coz he was still Single, always The Player, and had remained Childless, so could Self Indulge shamelessly.  *LOL*

Anyway, after Transforming her Space, now The Daughter has been in a Cleaning Frenzy and Deep Cleaned and Organized the whole Back Patio/Porch Area.  We discovered a huge Black Bag of Good T-Shirts back there, some of which I've been looking for a really long time.  Have no idea how they ended up Bagged and on the Back Patio over near The Man's Workbench, I'd of never looked there for anything of mine.  About half of it is For Sale, some are Fav Shirts I'll Keep for myself, and several The Daughter and The Son wanted so I gave them.  It was like Christmas in August to find them, all neatly folded too, but we had to throw it all in the Laundry to Wash it since it's clearly been out there a very long time now.  Nothing was damaged Thankfully.  The only explanation I have is it may have all been in the Art Studio Space back when Allen and The Young Prince were occupying it and they bagged it up and set it out there coz they did put a lot of my things on that Back Patio so they could move their things in.  Mystery Solved now of the Missing T-Shirts.  *LOL*  We found that some Pecans had been Stored up by a Critter back there and disposed of them. 

 I have a Milk Crate full of some I'll now Sell too, so that's good also.  Only a scant few will be Donation bound, coz they were solid color Tees none of us wanted or wouldn't fit anyone.  I don't bother to Sell anything but Specialty and Band T-Shirts.   And we do Sell a lot of them and my Demographic of Customer to the Showroom now are Teens thru Young Adults in their 20's or 30's.   And they are the ones spending Money now so I don't even try to appeal to a Demographic that isn't.   People my Age are a bust to Sell to, so are Older Adults with Families to Support and more financial obligations than disposable income.  I know my Target Customer now and that's all I concentrate on appealing to.  And I'm enjoying that Customer Base too, I meet a lot of them when they're Shopping in our Showroom and they really dig our Vibe and Aesthetic, so I know we're doing something Right in there.  It's just Sales are hit and miss lately, but it is Summertime and Sales are Soft when it's real Hot and lots of folks leave for Cooler Climates.

States with inclement Weather have folks leaving for Warmer Climates like ours in the Fall and Winter Months, here it's the Spring and Summer Months that we get a population shift and mass Exodus.   I think Vendors are Eager to put out their Fall and Autumnal Vibe and Holiday Merch early so that we're all feeling less Stressed during the Summer... it got to 118 Today Unofficially, searingly Hot.  So, Yeah, I've been diggin' trawling all the Shops that have the Fall Merch and Halloween Merch Displayed and longing for Autumn already.  I have picked up some great Vintage Halloween Merch and even an Interesting Metal and very sharp Creepy Cool Bladed Skull contraption for The Man's Knife Collection for only Four Bucks at the GOODWILL mixed in with the Halloween Merch.  {See Below}

It has a Handle on the Back of it that you put around your Hand like Brass Knuckles, very lethal contraption this would be in the Wrong Hands!!!  Or some very Skilled Hands.  *Ha ha ha and Winks*   Let us just say any Home Invader would get quite the Surprise with the Weaponry Collection and set of Skills that The Man has and his Natural Instincts to fiercely Protect his Family at any Age.  Looks like a Harmless Old Man, but never underestimate your Opponent.  He once had a big Young Thug at a Convenience Store Gas Station talk some smack about the Marines and then try to Assault him for some reason.  We don't know if the Guy was gonna try to Rob him or just violently attack an Elderly Marine?  Some Thugs will Target Seniors purposely, but he'd picked the Wrong Senior Citizen for that.  *Winks*  I don't even know why the Guy thought an Old Marine with a slew of High Honor Decoration Medals on his Cap would be an Easy Mark?  *Eye Roll*  Even an Old Bad Ass will put The Serious Hurt on you.  *Winks*

So, The Man had to beat the shit out of him in self defense, and then put him right thru the Windshield of the Guy's own Vehicle!!!  He said it took all his restraint to do it without Lethality, becoz efficiently Neutralizing a Threat is what his Training was for, so that you didn't Die for your Country, but make the other Guy Die for his.  His form of Martial Arts is Japanese Street Fighting, which he says isn't so much the Art of Self Defense, it is the Art of Killing. And there's no single Formal Form.  It's  Learning how many ways you can Kill someone efficiently and with the least amount of effort and energy expended when Mortal Combat is necessary.  Of coarse the Guy limped off in his Vehicle, terribly hurt, and big hole in his Windshield which put him right into his Front Seat without going thru a Door.  *LOL*  So he'd need ER Services for sure.  We called the Police, Circle K had it all on Surveillance, The Man only had broken Sunglasses and slight injury to his Face, that's all the Guy had managed to do with the 1st Move... The Man will give any ignorant Civilian a 1st Move, after that you're Finished.

Alas, those kind of Skills and Training is why most places won't take him with TBI and Dementia and probably so many Veterans who were in Special Forces.   If they put him in Restraints then he assumes he's a POW and will do anything to Escape... and that could end up deadly, so I do completely understand the concerns.  But, sometimes I'd like more Side Help with the Caregiving.   He's a Good Man, a Kind Man, and he deserves the level of Care he's Earned the Right to from Veteran's Services after 39 Years of Service and Sacrifice to Country.  I don't Care how difficult or expensive it is, he's EARNED it, MORE than Earned it actually, it caused him his 100% Disability Status, even way before he ever got TBI and Dementia.  Those came AFTER he was involuntarily Medically Retired due to extent of Service Related Disability and put out to Pasture!  I don't dispute it was Time for him to be Retired, but, don't deny him Services due to extent of his Disability, and the Training the Military gave him for their Purposes, that's just Wrong.  Another Mini Rant now over.  *Winks*

Speaking of Himself, he was having a very rough day Emotionally.  So I took him out for a nice Meal, which is always a handy distraction when he's not doing so well and giving me the Stink Eye over just about anything.  *Ha ha ha*  Even if he just played with it, which he mostly did, then I wouldn't have to Cook for him later and just serve it up again at Home to get it into him.  He doesn't Care if his Meals look Editorial or a Hot Mess that's been Toyed with.  *Smiles*   He gets Moody, it was earlier than usual for a Sundowners Episode, and I didn't wanna have to go all Dark Dawn on him to get compliance or make MY Statement that we weren't Going There and going to Battle.  I prefer that you Fight me all day long and never See me, coz then you'll be so worn down you won't have the Energy when I finally come for you to finish you off in a Surprise Final Ambush Attack you never saw coming.  *Bwahahahaha*

  So, a Chicken Penne Meal with a nice Herbed Breadstick was choosing my Battle Wisely and Strategically.  *Winks*  I didn't have to go on the Warpath and he didn't have to Fight to the Death and nobody had to Die on a Stupid Hill not worth Fighting Over... Win-Win.  *LOL*  His Older Brother, Bob, who he Adores, and is a Wealthy Man, Generous to a Fault, but used to having his own way all the time and is the Poster Child for the Patriarchy... used to foolishly go to Battle with me in the Earlier Years.  The Man finally convinced his Big Brother, listen, she's like a Female Great White Shark and if there's One Drop of your Blood in her Waters that you foolishly stepped into, you're a Goner, so, just leave her Alone and stay out of her Waters Bob.  Now Bob and I get along just Fine.  *Winks*  I actually LIKE Bob, and The Man's Younger Brother, both are Great Guys, their Mom Raised Three Good Sons and Two Good Daughters.  I got the Pick of the Litter tho' IMO.  *Winks*  Here was my Meal {Pictured Above and Below}, which I Shared half of with The Son when I brought it Home.  Coz it was past time to get The Man back Home before he deteriorated further and we might risk getting Banned from "Applebees".  *Bwahahahahaha*

*******

No longer melted down, i'm all ice queened up again... dawn... the bohemian