Stay In Your Own Lane

 I decided I'll probably do our Taxes on or around the first of April, since, pretty sure we'll owe again, so, in no hurry to Pay.  *LOL*   I do hear that Refunds are expected to be extremely delayed due to IRS cuts by DOGE taking a Chainsaw reckless approach to everything.   So for anyone who the Government owes Money to, no telling when they'll get Paid?   The Son did his and is getting Five Bucks back, no lie, Five Bucks, close call there.  So, he's going to ask his Employer to up his percentage deducted, that's too close to Owing.   As it is he's got a 25% Garnishment for that Predatory Lender's Judgment, almost paid off.  But, being in about a 22%-25% Tax Bracket too, that means he's only getting about 50% of what he's Earning, not enuf to Live on actually.   So upping deductions more means even less each Payday and he's barely making it now, even living at Home with us Helping him out.

So, we watched some Comedy Specials together on NetFlix, which he renewed for me.  He knew I wanted to get thru all Six Seasons of "Lost", his Sister as well, she's slightly ahead of where I'm at in Season Five.  And we Love the Comedian Specials, just about all of them.   The Son has been quite discouraged about his Economic struggle and the fact, after the Owner of his Company suddenly dropped Dead, there's too much uncertainty and chaos with the Widow running the place.  He doesn't wanna hafta start over someplace else, but may have to if the Company folds.   He likes what he's currently doing and has some Seniority and good Hourly pay compared to a lot of what other places are offering.  When they did that big Layoff over the Summer he got Laid Off and then they begged him to be Hired back only 10 Days later.  He agreed, on his own Terms, which was Helpful to be Negotiating from a Position of Strength. 

 He was the only one they Hired back on or even asked to come back.  He said all the Newbies are inexperienced, but, Cheaper Labor.  And he doesn't feel like being their Babysitter and let Management know, not my Day or Job to Watch them.  *Winks*  Most don't even know how to Prep, Clean or Repair their Equipment and have to rely on him to do it FOR them, when it should be part of their Job.   He's told Management they should be Training them how to do that for themselves if they don't know what they're doing yet.   Plus, high turnover, so it's like they're constantly having to Train Newbies constantly.  It's not efficient nor is it really economical or good business... but, it's not his Ship, so he said they'll either Sail it or Sink it, not anything he is responsible for.  He's made his recommendations, that's all he can do.

The Son did a BBQ Today of Carne Asada for Tacos, and Sargento has come out with Two new Cheeses, one has Cholula Queso Quesadilla Cheeses, and the other has Frank's Red Hot with American Cheeses.   And they had a Special where if you bought 2 Packages you got 3 Packages Free of any kind of Sargento Shredded Cheese!   They have another new one with McCormick Red Pepper Flakes in Mozzarella and Parmesan Cheese but they were all out of that one.  I went back and got some more of what they had and we noticed there are either Supply Chain Issues already going on, or Panic Buying like during Pandemic.  Shelves were bare and a lot of things were out of stock in the big Grocery Chains, and that's unusual.   Could all be due to the Tariff's already and the Economy tanking with all the uncertainty and chaos.

I've re-written this part of the Post a few times.  The Man has Sundowners now with the Dementia onset, it can make Caregiving after Sundown and beyond more challenging.   Especially if we have Guests since he can't People after Sundown.  And we had some of the Adult Kid's Friends over, people he's known their whole lives and during the day can be fine around.  Luckily all the Friends understand and everyone stayed Outside around the Fire Pit rather than disrupt his Calm.  *Whew*  He was beginning to get wound up just knowing Guests were arriving and so our Kids were concerned if he'd behave or melt down?  This Triggered The Son's Autism and The Daughter's Schizophrenia, so, Fun Times until I got everyone back to Center and assured there would be no Trouble in Paradise.  *Whew and Winks*  It ended up going Well and I divided my Time between Caregiving Inside and Guests Outside.  *LOL*

 

Princess T spent all the time building her new Desk, which had to be put together.  It was complicated so I'm very Proud of her figuring it out by herself, it took a few Hours but the Desk is lovely and put together well.  I'm also glad she held out and didn't Buy just anything, but exactly what she wanted.  It's Black and Contemporary, looks really good and has everything she'd wanted it to be.   It was also a good Price Point and they offered her Free Delivery from this Company too.   Eli the Cat doesn't Hate it, so, he'll probably leave it unmolested.  *Smiles*  He was chill with it and probably becoz he was there for the whole construction project watching it come together, like the Christmas Tree Season, if it takes Time to put up, he is more tolerant of it and leaves it alone.  The Desk is small enuf she'll likely find good placement for it, her Room is pretty full now.  She's running out of Space... the Apple didn't fall far from the Tree after all.  *LOL and Le Sigh*

I did take a Pix of said Desk and of our Guests together with The Son around the Fire Pit, but I haven't downloaded any of that yet.  So, it won't be in this Post.   Three of The Son's Childhood Friends came over and one of The Daughter's Friends, so, we did have a fair amount of their Generation around, all good People.  Everyone was respectful of The Man not being able to Socialize.  One of the Guys has a Dad whose 85 so he said he has to Deal with similar challenges with his own Dad now.  Sometimes it's difficult for our Children not to Personalize how The Man just is now, and, it's not really Personal at all once Dementia and TBI change a Person.  You have to learn to Love them and the Person they now are and grieve who they once were and will be no more.   And with any deterioration of a cognitive decline nature, that changes constantly too... in layers you lose them.   By the time they're fully Lost, it's almost a Relief for them and everyone else that it's over.  It's not an easy or painless exit from this Realm.

I was watching a Ghosthunter Show and they were visiting a Deep Desert Sanitorium, now abandoned, that dealt with the initial Tuberculosis Epidemics.  It's on the rise again BTW.  Anyway, I did not know that some of the infirm had spent 15 Years Hospitalized before they finally succumbed!  Becoz it's highly contagious they couldn't leave, can you only imagine being Hospitalized that long for a Terminal Illness?!   And the Cost of Treatment and Care... it would rival any long term Care, but be harder to Staff, I would Imagine, since it would put the Caregivers and Medical Staff at grave Risk of contracting, like COVID did.   And they had infected Children that had to spend their entire Lives, as short as it would be, or as long, Hospitalized permanently!!!   I had a Maternal Aunt that got Polio... and my Mom survived many Plagues of her Era, catching them, yet not Dying from them.  My Dad must have had a strong constitution, he never got Sick, until End of Life.  Tho' he did lose Three Brothers in Childhood, and outlived all 10 of his Siblings.

 

In Mom's Family her Older Brother was the last Sibling, he lived to be 90.  Mom was in her mid-80's when she Crossed Over, but their Younger Sister Died in her early 50's, she's the one who'd Survived Polio and a Brain Tumor removal.   Of coarse my Parents said in their day, a lot of Babies and Children Died, mortality was much higher for Kiddos, especially higher in certain Ethnic demographics.   I fear we may be devolving again towards that, with how things are going with such poor Leadership and installation of the Incompetent and Conspiracy Theorists running Agencies they are in direct opposition with.  Still, there are those who Imagine it will still be a good thing... and debating it with a Believer is pointless by now.   I do know some and tho' it can be difficult, I will hear what some have to say if they're not confrontational to an extreme about defending it all.  Just so I can TRY to understand what the Appeal is to them?   Since, I simply can't see anything Appealing, but, clearly, a large swath of America still does.  And they reside among us and always will.

Above is a Pix of The Daughter's Paternal Grandma when she was Young.  A Beautiful Woman inside and out, even tho' I never was Married to their Son, his Parents kept in touch with me for about the past 35 Years.   But lost touch for the last 8 or 9, I don't even know if they're still Living?   I was even closer to her Mother, my Daughter's Great-Grandma Edith.  A Wonderful Woman, Retired Paralegal from Wisconsin, we Wrote Letters to each other all the time and she came to Arizona for visits with us.   The Paternal Grandparents actually moved to Arizona from Indiana to be closer to The Daughter and still live in Northern Arizona, if they are still among the Living?  They didn't like who their Son eventually Married, he and Wife had no Children, so it probably irked him that they were close to me and had a Relationship with the Child he Fathered and abandoned.  He left me when I was about 6 Months Pregnant and only saw her once directly after her Birth, it was awkward.

But, his Parents and Grandma appreciated me allowing them to be part of her Life, even tho' I didn't have anything more to do with him.  His Four Siblings chose to have no part of her Life tho' and no contact, which was Fine, they could have and just chose not to.   The Daughter enjoyed what contacts she had and didn't ask many Questions about him or the rest of his Family that chose to not be involved.   I Married The Man when she was Seven and The Son was Three, so as far as they were concerned, The Man was their Dad and they had no Need to know or have contact with absentee Baby Daddies.   I was Married to The Son's Father briefly, the Relationship before Marriage was longer than the brief Marriage.  He was a Sociopath, and ended up substance abusing badly, so, I wasn't having Children exposed to any of that.   BTW a lot of Sociopaths are likeable, manipulative and very charismatic, everyone liked my Ex and he was exceedingly popular, Handsome and Intelligent, but he was dangerous, all Sociopaths are not Safe People.

The Man was a Keeper tho', his Family would have preferred him to Marry a nice White Mormon Gal, so they weren't particularly thrilled with our Union.  *Winks*   Oddly, his Ex Wife's East Coast Italian Family liked me better as the new Wife, than his own Family did.   I got along fabulously with The Man's Ex, her new Husband, and our Oldest Daughter's entire Maternal side of the Family, go figure!!!   Good People, I genuinely Like them and keep in touch to this Day with all of them. Which has made it easier on The Man since he Married me, to have contact with his Ex's side of the Family now.  He wasn't expecting me and his Ex to become close, but, she's a good Woman, I can see why they fell in Love and Married.   Her Family LIKE me a lot, they didn't embrace The Man even when he was Married to his Ex.  Not that he wasn't always a good Guy, but, Divorces can strain relationships across the board and be very complicated Relationally with extended Family.  And, hers was a big Italian Family, he's NOT Italian.  *Winks*  

I Dated some Italians and Sicilians in my Day, my Ex in fact was Half Italian, Half Mexican/Native American, probably Yaqui.   Some Latino Families prefer their Kids to Date and Marry into their own Culture too, whaddya gonna do, Humans can be very Tribal like that sometimes.  My Ex Husband, The Son's Dad, was Adopted by an affluent White Family, they were over 40 when they Adopted Kids after being unable to have any of their own.   They weren't thrilled about me either, mostly due to my Ancestry, Strange, since Two of the Three Kids they Adopted were not White Children... but, whatever.  I always felt that after only being able to get One White Infant, they only Adopted the Two other Ethnic Kids to keep him company?  

I didn't Like my Ex's Parents at all, frigid, uppity, pretentious and overly Religious Fundies, we met only at our Wedding, that was Enough.  *LOL and Whew*   Anyway, The Man's Ex's Family have eased up on him, due to me.  Go Figure!   And all my In-Laws of who I did Marry, are Dead, so, no In-Law Problems now.  *Bwahahahaha, Perfect!*   The Oldest Daughter is very, very close to her Family there in Pennsylvania, but has come out to Arizona to visit us a couple times over the Years.  She never has had anything to do with The Man's Family, or they with her.  Which I always thought was Strange, she's a great Kid and turned into a Fine Young Woman, her Kids have turned out so Well, and now there's lovely Great-Grandchildren, so, there was no reason for The Man's Family to act like she didn't exist.  Their Loss, The Man's Ex wasn't even opposed to me being in her Child's Life, so I know she wasn't the major barrier, so I assume it was their Choice to be indifferent and uninvolved?

I am from a background where Family is EVERYTHING.   Whether you're Biologically Connected or whether you are Connected in other ways that aren't Biological necessarily, you stay Family even if it gets complicated and blended.   So, I think if Family is important to those other Families, you will find common ground to build a foundational Relationship on that, which is meaningful and lasting.   Unless an Ex is Psycho and poses a Threat or Danger, we can still get along just Fine.   We're still close to The Young Prince's Paternal side of the Family and Princess T's Paternal side of the Family.   There are even a few Members of The Man's Family I've managed over the Years to become closer to as well.  We're Cordial and I know it's good for him to have some of his Family maintaining contact from time to time, they realized I wasn't going away, this Month will be our 36th Anniversary.  Plus, we don't live close enuf to any of them for it to become problematic.  *Winks*

The Man was very close to my Dad, he was like the Dad he couldn't get close to at Home.   My Dad and my Father-In-Law couldn't be more different Dads in every way.   The Man and my Mom had a very complicated Relationship, she could be a difficult MIL.  *Ha ha ha*  She was good to him and had his Back 100%, but their personalities just clashed.   I'd venture to say he was closer to my Mom than to his own Mom, in spite of complexities of the Relationship, becoz when he had Crisis or a Point of Need, my Mom was always there for him and his own wasn't.   As many near Death experiences as he went thru, during Wartime and in Poor Health or Catastrophic Accidents, I found it very Strange that a Mother wouldn't show up.  Different ways of Being I guess.   

They were very Churchy and Religious, his People, and claimed Family was important, I just didn't SEE it put into Action over the Years, and Words are meaningless without corresponding Actions IMO.  Seems their involvement was very Conditional and not Unconditional Love.   Plus, with the LDS, I have noticed it behaves more like a Cult Religion.  Where there is exclusivity and they shun anyone who isn't a Member in good standing anymore or who isn't "Of" them.   I've met some Amish, Jehovah's Witnesses, and Mennonites who left their Church and said those Religions are very much the same.   Pretty much the difference between a Religion and a Cult is what happens when you try to Leave.  And I'm not a Fan of any Organized Religion anyway, the hypocrisy tends to abound across the board with so many, which is unfortunate really.  I prefer having Relationship with my Creator over just having Religion.  And so many Atrocities have been committed thruout History by the Religious, over people's Religions or Spiritual differences.  I don't see how that's considered Godly?

So, Moving on... to present Atrocities in the making... here's a List of the DOGE Employees including the Ketamine King, being passed around and Shared... worth Passing On... or whatever... *Winks*   Hey, they got our information and now we got theirs, Touche'.  Let the Games begin...   I do think The Resistance needs to become more Organized and Forceful to protect our own Best Interests.  This Regime is not looking out for the Best Interests of the American People, not even those who Elected them.  They certainly aren't looking out for the Best Interests of our Allies, none of them.  They are certainly too cozy with other brutal Regimes.  I don't Trust any of them, they are up to no good.   I give them no Benefit of any Doubt becoz I have no Doubts about them and what they're up to.   I don't support nor make excuses for any of it.  And to be Silent is complicity.  Be Militant, make Good Trouble.

Now, on to the Fluff of Life, Today while The Daughter is doing her Housekeeping Job in the Far East Valley again, I'll probably visit some Eastside Antique Malls.  Just Window Shopping, which is as enjoyable as actual Shopping for me, I don't Need to Buy another thing in this Lifetime.  *Winks*   But browsing Antique Malls is so Nostalgic that I find it to be quite enjoyable.   I often see items I remember having or growing up around in my Parent's Homes or Grandparent's Homes.  I Love it when a Young Person is interested in having a Love Of Old and Preservation, whether of the Natural World, Buildings, or of Stuff, since, they will be the Keepers Of The Past we'll pass the Torch or Baton to eventually.  It will be up to them how much of it will Exist into the Future?   Most of my Friends are Industry People now, so we are Kindred Spirits when it comes to our Passions for Collecting, Preserving, Loving Old Stuff and finding uses for it in the Modern World that doesn't appreciate it or value it as much.

There are times when a Young Person will come into our Home and not value or appreciate History at all when they arrive.  Then leave with a greater Appreciation becoz we were able to engage in Dialogue about just the Stuff and it's Story.   Most Young People do Love a good Story and I'm a good Storyteller, or so I'm told.  *Winks*  I come from a long line of Storytellers since each of my Parents came from Cultures with no Written Language, so Storytelling was how they passed things along.  So, it comes Natural to us to carry that forward, my Kids and Grandkids now tell the Stories passed along to them by Elders in the Family, and so it goes.   And I've found that even Non-Family often enjoy the Stories and ask or are showing a Curiosity for stuff and what it's Back Story is.  Last Night one of The Son's Friends was fascinated to go Deep while in The RV Garage Mahal coz tho' he's only 38, he LOVES Antiquities and I got plenty.  And it all has a Story.  *Winks*

I got Stories for Days.  *Bwahahahaha*  He's known me forever, but doesn't get to visit often.   So we pick up the Storytelling when he's here and asking if he can look at my Hoard and ask about certain Objects.  *LOL*   Now, he's a Young Republican, so we couldn't be more different in Political Views, but, he's fascinated by Hippie Culture regardless.  He's very Establishment, but felt that the whole Anti-Establishment Movement actually kept Balance in a System that requires it, and different Points of View to be optimally functional.  I tend to be able to Agree with that Assessment.   Democracy Works best when we can work together regardless of differences and Points of View not being similar.  He was in the Marine Corps., tho' he didn't make a Career out of it.  He grew up with The Son and they're Best Friends in spite of being so different in Personality and Point of View.  I know I influenced my Kids and of coarse his Parents did the same.   He fell in LOVE with a very Radical 1969 Hippie Political Poster which is Signed by the Creator of it and highly Collectible.

It's a Satirical Cartoon Drawing with a rather controversial yet whimsical Quote, and I was Surprised he got all the Nuances and Subliminal Messaging going on in it.  It's a Simple Drawing with LOTS of Nuanced complex Messaging going on, he caught on to it all.  So did The Son, he knows I'm often making a Statement without making an obvious Statement.  *Winks*  So, I gravitate to Objects that do that too and are Deeper than they Appear to be on the Surface.   I know how much the Poster is Valued at but he felt it is Priceless and probably worth so much more than I realize, he could be Right?   I did Appreciate that Brandon also Appreciated that Poster more than most people probably would.  Yes, his Name is Brandon and he's rather MAGA, how hilarious, huh?  *Bwahahahaha*  We Love him in spite of that.  *Smiles* 

 

 And, he won't go deep into the Political Weeds with me, knowing my Opposition is fierce and not timid about expressing it.   And I dissect things like I'm doing an Autopsy on what has been said or claimed on the
Far Right and it's Orchestrators.   *LOL*   The Son and Brandon both Joke that they've only managed to remain as close as Brothers and Best Friends their whole Lives becoz The Son refuses to talk Politics or Religion with anyone, ever!  And, before this Regime, that was usually my own Mantra, coz I didn't particularly Care what your Politics or Religion were and supported your Right to Worship or Vote as you saw fit to.   So long as it didn't interfere with MY Life... but once it crosses Boundaries and strays into my Lane, and you don't stay in Yours, well... you know... we now got us a Situation.   

And I'm not timid about doing a total Takedown if you insist on Engagement.  *Bwahahahaha*  But, I will even discuss Hippie shit with a REAL Conservative if they're Interested in being Enlightened about us, and avoid the MAGA nonsense and Trigger.  *Winks*   Brandon is truly Interested in the whole Hippie Era Movement and what we were all about, even if his Family were the antithesis, so he didn't grow up around any of our Views.   His Dad is a real Bad Ass tho' and Trained with Chuck Norris in Martial Arts.   He and his Dad claim that The Man is being very Secretively Humble and has Humility about what a Bad Ass he really was during his Military Service.  They claimed that they read a Book by Carlos Hathcock where he mentioned The Man.  The Man was Trained by Hathcock and was the first to max out the Marine Corps. Firing Range, which is why he was chosen to be a Sniper, but, he doesn't like anyone to know about it.  So, shush.  *LOL*

 Brandon was telling The Son, your Dad is a really Big Deal even tho' he underplays it and won't Talk about it or want anyone to know about it.  I'd like to see that Book, since, The Man won't talk about a lot of stuff like that.  And he's sensitive about Sniper "Score Keeping", he'd rather forget how many People he's had to Kill to fulfill many Missions, not keep Score of Confirmed Kills.  Many Kills couldn't be Confirmed, but were carried out.   It's not something he's particularly Proud of, taking of Lives, even for legitimate reasons his Government had or War dictated.  He is Aware that every Soldier of any Nation has Loved Ones, all of them, and their Loss is a profound one to those who Loved them.

*******

Blessings Love and Light from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian