So, I'm up in at a ridiculous Hour again, unable to stay Asleep, and know I'll be fading by Mid-Afternoon again. Napping is easier than Sleeping these Days and my Appetite is really screwed up. My Stomach will hurt from being Hungry, so my Body is giving Hunger Signals, but then, I can't Eat. I try... can't do it... and would get nauseous if I try to force food in, so, it's less uncomfortable to abstain, Hunger Pains pass, some people don't know that.
If you've experienced Food Insecurities, you know that tho', so, I'm not Panicking that I can't eat for however long this is a nuisance. Absolutely sure from a Personal, National and Global standpoint, it's the Reason Why, so, whaddya gonna do? I can't Change any of it for the better, so, it's just exhaustive to Daily trudge thru. The Young Prince has been having very long conversations with me, highly unusual... and they're Deep ones. Seems we've been having similar Premonitions and Dark Prophesy, being much Younger, it Terrifies him more. He's Afraid, and not just for himself, I Get It.
So, we Openly discuss it and compare what we're Foreseeing. It does line up and he couldn't know mine and I couldn't have known his, until we compare them in Open Dialogue. And we know how Accurate each of ours has always been, so it troubles us, Yes. Do you ever just not wanna be here Gramma?, he'd asked. And he explained that tho' not Acted Upon, how do you Cope with having THAT Thought every Day? Becoz you KNOW something Evil this way comes?
Well, I personally surround myself with People I Love and Trust, the Carefully Selected Inner Circle, in an Atmosphere Created intentionally of layered Beauty in my Personal Spaces to offset the Darkness and Ugliness that is in Society, and worsening and very much escalated it seems. I also retreat to Nature, which, in all it's Glory is mostly Beautiful and Restorative. Even tho' it can have it's Moments playing out that can be quite catastrophic and powerful, or just Natural in a more Primal violent way too. I Talk with my Creator and ask for Divine Guidance for what a Human Devoted to Goodness should be Walking Out right now and Doing? Becoz of my Upbringing I also Consult the Ancestors for Guidance and added Protection.
My Parents always Consulted the Ancestors, those that came before them, to give them a wider Overview, from beyond One Realm. Whether you use/Believe that or not, I'm not Debating, it just Works for me and Ancestral Warnings have been conveyed in response to being Consulted, to my Benefit. I also Study the Human Condition of those still Living, so I know What and Who to just avoid being around the Negative Energy of and less Exposure to. And SEE for What and Who they REALLY ARE. It will pollute and infect your Mood/Spirit like a Disease otherwise. Bad Company corrupts even Good Character. There's a lot of Company out there that might not be all Bad mind you, but they sure are making some very Bad Choices, and, that's not going to end well and be without consequence to them, and it could spill over onto you, so, Guard yourself carefully.
He's Soliciting and receiving my Sage Advice and longer Experience on the Planet as Evidence that you can move thru some heavy shit and Survive any and all of it, if you don't give up, give in, or give out. And be wary, very wary, Life is filled with Choices that are consequential, I've made Bad ones too, hard to get thru Life without doing so in fact. Yet, I knew the Deeper Question was, but, do you really Want to? Some Days, No, but I don't succumb to the fact, I could, but I don't. We all have our Weaker Moments, our Darker Moments, I resist my own Devils and they will then flee... or at least be held back and in Check. *Winks* Don't think or pretend you don't have some Demons of your own, you do, you're not fooling most if they Know you intimately and have seen them revealed on occasion.
That No, I admitted with transparency, that right now I don't want to be here, or perhaps there, or perhaps anywhere at the Moment. Not in the America I Love either. I don't Like what we've Become as a Nation right now and I do feel quite betrayed that I know we'll be collateral damage over the Choices of what was a Majority this time making that Bad Decision for ALL of us to have the consequences of. Very soon in fact, so there will be a reckoning. Count on it, it's coming. Becoz I've Traveled extensively and found some lovely spots to Land temporarily, but, this is Home, and I always wanted to return eventually. And I Protect my Home and Defend it. And have decided firmly to do so this time... and not relinquish it to any intrusion and invasion wrought upon it by Domestic or Foreign Enemies trying to take it by force from us.
What we each are Protecting within our Sanctuary Spaces is too Precious to be put in Danger. Yet, right now the Home we know is being under attack and ransacked by Dark Forces that most of the People have decided to embrace, Worship, install and will let pillage it. And tho' we tried in Vain to Warn of the Dangers, it fell upon some Deaf Ears and some Blinded Eyes. Many will get Woke Up and realize, fuck... what have we done? Some won't tho', some are Okay with flirting with the Devil and being a Disciple. They have just opened the Door and Invited Evil in willingly now... and I know what the Devil is capable of once a Foothold becomes a Stronghold due to a Voluntary Invitation. And Demonic Possession is some Serious shit, whether you Believe in it or not, whatever the Devil Possesses and obtains Dominion over, isn't given up easily... sometimes not at all. And when you meet him and those who are his, it's an Encounter you won't soon forget.
I watched a Docuseries about The Night Stalker, Richard Ramirez, he embodies what can go horribly Wrong when a Human has Invited Satan in and allow those Forces to direct your Path and become an embodiment of Evil in The Flesh. As someone who has Retired from a large DA's Office and even Worked some high profile Cases just as Dark and Horrific, I can tell you those kind always have their Groupies, always, sometimes even before they're Caught or Publicly Identified. Now, why some Humans are Attracted to it, wanna be a part of it, Worship it, I have no Idea, becoz it repulses most. And it should.
It certainly repulses me and I'm a pretty Morbid Human, but I don't fuck around with Evil entities or underestimate their raw Power and insidious dangerous Nature. They are notorious Tricksters and Seducers, no matter how apparent what they are is, the Pretenses and Facades can Fool a lot of Folks enuf to receive an Invitation anyway. And often, they just show up Uninvited and you're in the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time and in their Crosshairs. Their intent is to Eliminate you then, you're a Barrier. Each of my Parents Taught me Carefully how to do Protection Ceremonies and Ask for Protection in ways their respective Cultures Taught them to, I do Perform my own Rituals to this day.
It's Helpful, but, Life will still carry it's particular Risks and none of us isn't Vulnerable to them my Friends. So, to think you are Immune and Protected not to end up in the Crosshairs, becoz you embody what is Good about Mankind, is naive and foolish actually. Bad things happen to Good Humans all the time too, and it can even make you a Target becoz of your effectiveness to Resist what is Dark or Evil, they know you would try to Stop them and you ARE a Threat to them, who Walk on the Dark Side. I'm a deeply Spiritual Person and one of the most authentically Godly Women I have known in my own Lifetime and went to Church with, did Ministry Work with, was horribly and brutally the Victim of a Local High Profile Murder.
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The Papers Spared more of the most Gruesome Details of the Crime, which included Sadistic lengthy Torture and Sexual Assault. She was Victimized while doing what we both had been doing for Underserved Humans in Crisis for Years, in a large Multi-Faith Food Ministry. She met a Devil that Day tho', while delivering Help to their Family, it was a Closed Casket Funeral we held for her. I usually went with her but was out of Town with my Welsh Uncle, we were in Vegas. Trudy let down her Guard and did a Solo Run coz the Family was so desperately Needy, they Invited her In. Protocol is, you never accepted such an Invitation. And No, didn't Appear Evil was Inviting her In. Extending Kindness and Charity towards Evil will not always have them extend Mercy... rarely so in fact, they see and mistake it as your Weakness to Exploit.
But, here was a Young Mother, Three or Four Adorable Children, I can't recall how many actual Hungry Kids the Sansings had to where they needed Nutritional Assistance, what Appeared to be a regular Family, someone you might live next door to. They weren't... especially the Husband. He was a cruel Sadistic Devil that had Dominion over his Principality and my Friend was meeting True Evil that Day. He got the Death Penalty, tho' he's still on Death Row... the Wife got Ten Years, she's probably been released Years ago. The Children, well, they Witnessed it all and Testified to the entire Crime, so clearly will be damaged goods for Life and no telling what other absolute Horrors before that they Witnessed or were done to them too as Innocents.
My Thoughts always were, this wasn't this Perp's first Crime, tho' we'll never know. Thankfully I didn't have to Work my Friend's Case at all... you Recuse yourself from any Case/File where you know the Defendant, Witnesses or the Victims, whew. Coz I knew the horrific Details of the Crime, but I sure didn't want those added Details of the Actual Homicide File in my Head forever and ever, you can't Unsee what you See, you can't Unhear what you Hear. Hate exists, Atrocities against Humanity are committed... and some expose themselves freely as being the Instruments of such Acts. The Incoming Administration did expose themselves, often... and America Chose Hate and a Promised Revenge and Retribution Tour over the Hope of a Positive Energy and Better Angels with more Humanity to move the Country forward. No excuses Justify that Choice adequately, they must Own it and the Consequences thereof they are Complicit in and will be held Responsible and Guilty for too.
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I have a lot of those Types of Cases in my Head forever and ever though. Just not hers from having had to Work it, just Experience it via knowing her, her Family, being her Friend, and what the Media was given access to put out there. There but for the Grace of God go I and I recognized that Fact and Reality. The Choosing of Victims can be calculated or random. Could have been me and not her, tho', I wouldn't have done some of the things she did that made her an Easier Mark, I know some Victims do everything Right and it won't matter, same Outcome.
And I'm putting all this Out Here becoz some of General Public seem to be of the Mind and Opinion that it can't happen to them... won't happen to them... they're immune somehow... and safer somehow... becoz of whatever they happen to Think or Believe Protects them. From Dark Forces... and Bad People, that's Quaint... but... not very Accurate I'm afraid. Your Faith in anything won't always Save you from some things my Friends, that's just a Reality. Reality Checks can be quite harsh and Unmerciful. Choose Carefully Who you Follow and what Side of History you will be on.
And Warning People of Dangers doesn't mean they'll take you Seriously or Heed you. Trudy didn't heed all the Protocols put in place to make whatever she was doing Safer. She, a Person of Deep Faith, apparently didn't Recognize a Devil when she saw and met one. For whatever urges and reasons, she got complacent about her Safety, assuming becoz she was a Good Person doing God's Work and all the Right Things, she was adequately Protected and wouldn't be harmed. She was not.
It not only cost her Life, but a horrific unimaginable Death, that she nor any Human would ever deserve to exit this Realm by. Why? I don't know Why... you can't explain many things or People. But the Study of Human Nature and the Human Condition is ongoing and we are a really diverse Species that don't always behave in the more predictable way a lot of other Species on the Planet do. Extending Kindness and Mercies towards some is appreciated and received appropriately, but, not always, so Beware... use some Discernment and Caution who you cozy up to and Trust. Many have Talked with what my Dad's People called "Forked Tongue" before... and they will again.
I've mentioned it before, I don't have to Wonder how a Crocodile will behave, fairly predictable and not compatible to cozy up to. I don't have to Wonder how a Bunny will behave, unless it's diseased, fairly predictable and compatible to cozy up to as a Member of the Animal Kingdom. But People... we're different... some have the behavior of a Crocodile and some have the behavior of a Bunny, some are a mixed Bag of some of both ends of the spectrum.
And a Human can Pretend to be something it's not. Animals generally don't, tho' there are some exceptions that disguise themselves to make their Predatory Nature more successful, or to Protect themselves from those Predators that Target them as a Food Source. I've known some Pretenders... some Predators... and some Authentic People. Discernment is an ongoing Process and certainly, I categorize People into what appears to be a Threat and what doesn't appear to be, we all do it. Sometimes we get it Wrong. Many have Paid the Ultimate Price for that.
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We're probably all gonna have to do some stuff Afraid in the Future my Friends... But, don't let Fear paralyze you and render you impotent... Dawn... The Bohemian
The blog always seems to put a smile on my face, with your family photos... and today it also reminds me of the violence that humans subject each other to for unknown reasons... Please keep posting .....
ReplyDeleteThank You, Yes, the Human Condition is very diverse and complex, lots of Mysteries we may never understand as to why some Humans are Peaceful and desire Harmony among our Species, and some are Cruel and Violence, so are difficult to try to be Harmonious with no matter how Noble the effort to. I have Worked in Two Corporate Lives that often showed glaring Issues confronting Humanity... my 1st Corporate Life was as a Bank Executive and Money is the root of all kinds of Evils to be sure and the thirst for Power and insatiable Greed drives many to do what they do. And Criminal Law, where you saw the worst that Humanity does within Society and to one another. Both Careers were very Enlightening, as a long time Hippie with those Sensibilities, it brought me a greater Understanding of Witnessing firsthand Two areas that Challenge far too many People and offer up Temptations they don't resist.
DeleteOnce your sleep cycle gets out of whack it's very hard to fix it.
ReplyDeleteIndeed. Usually I have no problem Sleeping or having a Routine, it's been disrupted by so many things beyond my Control that it has mostly challenged my ability to fully relax. I'm sure I'll Center and Maintain my Calm better eventually.
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