This Morning I'm getting my Crown done on that Cracked Molar I had a bit of sensitivity of and found out that's the reason why, when I had my Teeth Cleaned on Tuesday and he noticed and Photographed the Crack for me to see it. He said I'm grinding my Teeth, likely due to Stress. AS IF I have Stress... or any reason to gnash my Teeth... Bwahahahahahahaha... my Dentist has a Twisted Sense of Humor like me so we both Laughed about that Dark Joke of Mi Vida Loca. I have to pick my Prescription Mouthwash up at FRY'S Pharmacy too.
I found out on Wednesday Night why the Antique Mall feels like they don't have to do anything Special for Vendors anymore, they have a Two Year Waiting List to Rent Spaces! So, they don't feel they Need to cater to any of us if they have so many waiting to be Tenants. Of coarse turnover is still high so they almost require a lot of prospective replacement Tenants rather than trying to keep Loyal Tenants who'd stay long term and be good for the Reputation of the Mall, so it's still a Bad Business Model IMO. Customers get disappointed if their fav Vendors are always leaving and going someplace else, to then try to locate them elsewhere.
We're constantly getting asked where a Vendor went that left the Mall and honestly, we almost never know if they even went somewhere else or just got out of the Game? Lots of good Vendors left the Industry or have scaled way back now in Rental Space and Inventory they carry. I'm glad I got all my Anime Plushies into Inventory before my Dental Work, just in case I don't feel up to it afterwards? it was risky to take on a Shift the Day After having the Work done. But I like keeping more of my Profits during the Holiday Season so build up as much Comped Space Rent as possible since my Rent is up to $604 a Month now for the Showroom and the Locked Case in the most Ideal Locations in there.
But even the Smallest Booths are well over $250 a Month now and Cases are $108 a Month, so less than $500 a Month for a whole Room is more reasonable and a better Deal IMO. Plus Scoring a Showroom is hard to come by, I waited Years to get one, and Locked Cases the same, Years wait to get one. Which is why I don't consider giving either of what we have up. We did at one time have the benefit of Two Showrooms, which is almost unheard of, very few Vendors have been that Lucky, but with Pandemic, we let a Showroom and a Booth, plus some Art Walls, and Open Shelving Upstairs, go.
I could move more Merch and Downsize faster with more Real Estate. But wanted to reduce Overhead Costs after Pandemic and with an iffy/shitty Economy and Bad Leadership in the White House. Until we have better Leadership the Prospectus for any Business Moves Long Term is really hard to calculate and gauge. He does such Crazy irrational shit all of the time and Grifts, to only be for the benefit of enriching himself and his Spawn or Cronies, or Extortion schemes, to the detriment of all others trying to make a Living. This level of Corruption is unprecedented and abnormal in a Democracy. We've gone into what I call Democrazy now, heading rapidly towards total Fascism and Authoritarianism.
I'm not sure what can of Business Model you can set up successfully in that kind of an Environment? And the Stock Market is Juiced, so it's all an Illusion and tied too closely to the AI Bubble, which, will burst very soon, and go totally Sideways, I Predict. I'm usually not an Alarmist or Pessimist, but even Guarded Optimism at this juncture is a stretch, I ain't gonna Lie, I got Serious Concerns about the direction we're heading Wheels off the fucking Rails under this Regime and it's Cabal of Vulgarians and Insane Stable Genius Psychopath at the helm! The fact the WHOLE of the Country isn't Worried about that is even more Alarming actually. We're really Dumbing Down Nationally the Critical Thinking ability and discernment of our Populace it seems, with still over 30% seemingly acting like fucking indoctrinated radicalized brainwashed Zombies!!!
The Elections really Concern me, ICE already said they're gonna Flood The Zone, but mostly Blue and Purple States. Yeah, if that ain't highly Partisan Political Intimidation and Voter Suppression Tactics from the Top of the Food Chain in Power, in order to try to hold onto it, I don't know what is. We Vote by Mail but they are trying to compromise that too. Ironic to me that every Republican in Power got Voted in by this Alleged Voter Fraudulent System they Claim all of the time, yet, they control the House, Senate and White House, but, it's all supposed to have been so fraudulent... how does that even fucking Square? If it's been SO fraudulent, how did you then Win again after Losing? *Shakes Head* Frankly I think he wants to eliminate Voting altogether so he can just install himself and his Spawn/Cronies for Life.
And their Base that thinks the Election was Stolen from them, then how did their Side get into complete Power and Win if it's not been a Free or Fair Election? It is the classic Tails I Win, Heads You Lose Mindset they seem to have. Definitely Voter Fraud if we Lose, but still claiming something is still Wrong with the System even when they Win???!! And Down Ballot even when Donnie Lost the Presidency, lots of his Party didn't and Won their Elections. Anyway, I think every Future Election is likely to have high Drama and the potential for some January 6th Type Violence. And Losers not accepting defeat or a Peaceful Transfer of Power that we've always had before this whole Shitshow came down the Golden Escalator and hijacked everything and Acolytes plus Sycophants enabled it all. If they can all have Lifetime Appointments and be Above The Law, it's what they all seem to now want and expect.
My Dental Work went well, no Pain while having it done, had to be numbed Twice, which isn't unusual for me, I don't respond real well to numbing agents so they usually had to give me more to have the desired effect. I don't know why? It is said Biological, Anatomical, Chemical Factors and Stress that change how our Bodies process Pain and Drugs is likely the reason, which, makes sense. I have a high threshold and insensitivity to Pain and I don't respond Normally to most Drugs. And frankly, the numbing agents don't last as long as they should for me either so I knew it would wear off prematurely as well. Which, it has.
In fact, Sleeping Pills and Anti-Anxiety Meds tend to make me feel quite Wired, and Caffeine Calms me and makes me Sleepy, which is opposite to what they should do when taken. Anyway, I didn't feel anything and got the temp Crown installed, permanent one in about 2 Weeks from now or sooner. The Novocaine hasn't worn off yet so I was able to get a Meal eaten of Pork Belly with Seasoned Potatoes once I got Home and get all my Morning Chores done and some Grocery Shopping, pick up my Prescription Mouthwash from the Pharmacy at my Grocer. I know I'll be sore when it completely wears off so I wanted to get everything done first.
We have the AC folks we have on Contract and Prepaid Retainer coming to do our Winter Maintenance between now and 2:00 p.m.. I also got all the Bills Paid for the 1st of the Month. I may take a Nap just so I can recoup a bit before picking the Granddaughter up from Work later this Afternoon and then make a Deposit at the Bank. We just had the AC Guy call both my Cellphone and the Landline, The Man was blocking the Hallway with his Walker and getting him out of the way to answer either Phone before it quit ringing didn't happen. So I then had to call the Main Office to confirm that we are here. The Man in that Walker can be so frustrating when he's blocking the way around him in a Room or Hallway.
He gets so flustered and confused and then he's agitated, as you're trying to move him out of anyone's way or your way. But he's so slow in the damned thing and I swear sometimes he'll wait to go into a Room that already has people in it, rather than waiting 'til they are out of there, and there's no room for him to bring that into the Room too and fit or not obstruct people. He'll do it when people are in there trying to Cook or Wash Dishes, or put Groceries away, and it's obvious he's getting in the way and has no urgent need to be in there right then too!
My Mom got a Motorized Wheelchair when she was no longer ambulatory and she was a menace in that thing too once she got Dementia. So I do know it can be part of the Disease/Condition to do contrary things with their Medical Equipment in a sort of demented entitlement kind of way and figuring everyone else and everything else should not be in their way. Even when they don't have the Right of Way or won't fit thru, they'll attempt to anyway, crashing into things and sometimes people, or getting stuck. I know that now he needs the damned thing so as to feel stable on his Feet, but it grates on all our Nerves, sometimes your Last Nerve when he's misbehaving with it or always in the way with it.
Okay, small Rant over. I know he can't help it really, dealing with lots of Medical Equipment in the Home is a Given at some point and it just means a lot of adjustments for everyone, not just the person requiring it all. My Mouth is Sore from being held open for over an Hour and having the series of numbing Shots in my Jaw, plus the trauma of the Work done, so I'm Emotionally a bit Raw right now and why trying to get to Two different Phones unsuccessfully pissed me off when he's blocking the way entirely and standing there like a Deer in the Headlights when I'm trying to shoo him in one direction or another so I can get to a Phone! *LOL*
I had to call back and be on Hold for a long while then, and was hoping the Tech wouldn't cancel the visit if he didn't get confirmation in time. Luckily he won't coz the Office said they'd contact him FOR me. *Whew* They give a Six Hour Window for when they come so I've had to not leave the House during that Window in order not to miss the Tech arriving. No way I can leave The Man in charge to handle that visit. The Son wasn't feeling good when he got Home from Work, said he was really Tired, so went to Bed by Noon, he's been in a Depressive Funk lately and quite morose. I didn't realize 'til later why he was so Down, but he couldn't talk about it right away, he'd almost Died that Morning in a Pedestrian/Vehicle Incident on his way Walking to Work!!! OMG!!! His Mortality had really hit him hard at how Fragile Life is and a Near Death Experience narrowly avoided!!! Too Soon after Mando's Vehicular Homicide being a Pedestrian Killed by someone Driving Crazy!!!
Things at his Work are really good so that's not problematic, but I think Life in general for him is not going well, and just Mortality is General has been a consideration too often lately. When he had his Friend Jeremy show up to visit, seeing Jeremy looking like he very likely is Dying, was hard, Jeremy is his Age, only 40. Mando just Died tragically, in his 50's. And several of The Son's Friends also in their Age Group have recently Died, so it gives someone Middle Aged Pause of Mortality isn't just for the Elderly. The Son knows he Drinks too much and drowning your Sorrows with alcohol doesn't really Work. He has only Healthcare for Medicaid folks who can't afford Medical... so he never gets Preventative Care for anything, not Medical, Dental or Mental Health... and he needs more Care of all Three.
He doesn't earn enuf to Support himself anymore coz cost of living is too high Locally, and doesn't have his own Transportation either. Just about all of his Friends are also having Personal Crisis, mostly Economically, no matter how hard they Work, everyone is only One Paycheck or Crisis away from disaster anymore it seems. And, it becomes disheartening I'm sure. The Niece was reminding him how fortunate they all are to have here to be and what a Blessing and Privilege it is, she has a different perspective of the Luck of it and being Mindful of that. Not everyone has a Safe Space to Land, she reminded him. She just got her 1st Paycheck Today from the New Job.
She's been doing Gig Work Deliveries to get by until she started getting her Paychecks from the Career Work. She'll still do Gig Work and play Poker to supplement her Income and try to Save Up for her own place by Winter. She'd like The Son to consider being a Roommate, but his lack of Transportation would be an Issue if he wasn't Walking Distance from his Work like he is right now. I can take him or he can Walk to and from Work right now. There aren't many affordable Apartments in this area with a good Walk Score. He doesn't want to live in some shithole in Da Hood and be far from his Employment too. He said that's barely better than being Homeless.
Where the least expensive Apartment Rentals are is in areas as dangerous as being on the Streets Unhoused. And would take up more of his Income than he can outlay on Part Time Minimum Wage Employment. So he doubts he is a candidate to be anyone's Roommate and be able to go halves on Costs, especially since Utility and Water Costs have soared. This Month's Bill came in for Utilities and we used less than the same time last Year for the Month and yet the Bill was just under Twice as High to use that much LESS!!! It's not sustainable for most Americans to have those kinds of massive increases unabated.
I just had the AC Tech change all our Filters for me, so now I don't have to. They always have some new product they try to upsell you on, not interested, no Money and I don't need/want another thing to have to be Financed in this Lifetime. *LOL* The Techs are always Young now, I think this Guy might be 30, if that. Nice Young Man, has a 2 Year Old Daughter... I always seem to have these Young People tell me their whole Life Story before they leave. The Man always says I'd make a great P.I. or Detective coz folks just open up and tell me stuff voluntarily and spill all the Tea. *Ha ha ha* I just must have that Grandmotherly Confidante' Look about me I Guess? *Winks*
The Bulbs on our UV Light installed to keep Molds out is up to $500 to replace now so we won't be having that done if they've burnt out. You only get about Two Years out of them and Mold hasn't been a problem for a while now so I'll hold off on replacing the Bulbs at that price point. Replacement Parts for anything that can be replaced rather than needing a whole new Unit are Crazy expensive now... as are whole new Units when they can't be repaired with replacement parts. And they don't build a damned thing to last anymore 2-7 Years, 10 if you are Lucky, is about the absolute Max Life of anything anymore, no matter how much you Paid for it or being Top Of The Line!!! Doesn't matter, might as well just Buy the Cheaper Model coz the High End Model won't last either.
The Son almost got run over in the Crosswalk at 5:00 a.m. this Morning Walking to Work! A Big Ford Truck tried to beat the Light and almost made a Right Turn into him, missing him by only a couple Feet, but only coz he jumped back just in time!!! He was Walking on a "Walk" Right of Way Pedestrian Light and was in the Middle of the Crosswalk, so he had nowhere to go and was in the Middle of the Street Legally Crossing, so yelled loudly, "You fucking Asshole!" So the Truck's Driver stopped! And The Son then thought, here we go, Today's the Day... and figured now there would be a violent confrontation. But, he was so Angry at almost being Run Over by some Asshole willing to Run Over a Pedestrian, coz if he hadn't seen the Headlights in his peripheral and jumped back, the Guy would have hit him at a high rate of speed!!! Killing or seriously Injuring him!!! Vehicle versus Pedestrian never Ends Well for the Pedestrian! And someone willing to run over any Living Thing shouldn't be behind the Wheel of a Vehicle!
Thoughts of what had just happened to Mando ran thru his Head and he was so Mad he walked angrily towards the Truck and the Driver thought better of it and took off. His Boss Witnessed the whole thing coz it was at the Intersection of where his Store is! She said she thought for sure she'd see her Employee get Run Over and Killed right in front of her Eyes! It shook them both up a lot, not a good way to start their Shift or the Day, too damn Close a Call. Thank God for The Son's quick Reflexes and peripheral Vision Saving him. We definitely don't Need another Homicide so close together. But people do drive Crazy, Carelessly, Distracted, Recklessly, Impaired, it's getting ridiculous how bad it is. Every Day is almost a close call, whether you're in a Vehicle or a Pedestrian, your Head has to be on a Swivel!!!
Anyway, the Young AC Tech had 'bonded' with me enuf that he did $300 worth of Work and Comped me it and said he won't even tell his Employer he did a Complimentary Service of some items that were problematic with the Old Unit. *Whew* It needs TLC, I know this, it's over 10 Years Old but I can't afford a 2nd New Unit or another Loan right now. It's rough, at some point shit needs Repairs or Replacement and there's no avoiding it, but for now it's limping along on a Wing and a Prayer. Arizona is hard on Units, we have excessive Heat and even excessive Cold in the Evenings during Winter. Desert Temps can fluctuate like no others, being high triple digit Heat during the Day and dropping to near Freezing at Night on the same day!!! So your Units work overtime all of the time. But Maintenance Costs are so astronomically High now, and Labor. Keeping Pace is a Challenge when you're on a Fixed Income.
Saw a good Movie "The Family" {2013} with Robert DeNiro, Tommy Lee Jones and Michelle Pfeiffer, among many others in an All Star Cast. Yes, it's Older but I hadn't seen it before, there's a lot of Movies I haven't seen yet. I don't get out much. *LOL* My Mouth finally quit hurting like Hell, so that's good, I took some Tylenol and a Nap, which helped. I did finally get to the Bank and make my Deposit and Mailed all Bills for the beginning of the Month. The Social Security hits late this Month, on the 21st, which is the latest all Year wouldn't ya know. So, a good thing I'm making some side Money to cover what needs to get paid by Mid Month and can't wait 'til the Feds pay us our Money. It hits all Year anywhere from the 15th to the 21st, that's quite a spread IMO. But whaddya gonna do, Right? Hurry Up and Wait.
The Son got a Free Concert Ticket from his Friend Garrett coz he couldn't make it and had already bought the Ticket, so just sent it electronically to The Son to use instead. He hadn't expected to go out Tonight so I felt he'd had more to Drink than he would have had he known he'd Score a Concert Ticket. He worked something out with The Niece to take him and pick him up after it was over at 11:00 p.m.. He wanted to give her Gas Money but she insisted he Buy her Cigarettes with it instead. He was concerned that Buying the Cigs then she might not have the Gas to come get him but she insisted on the Cigs and he Bought them as the Agreement to get him there AND pick him up. Well, when it was time to pick him up she said she didn't have enuf Gas now and he'd have to spend Money for an Uber, so he was really Mad. He told her he'd wanted to put Gas in so she'd have enuf to get him there and back... now he's Paid and only gotten a One Way Ride and 10 Miles to Walk Home, when she knows he has Work in the Morning!
So, he knew I'd gone to Sleep early coz of hurting from my Dental Work, which the Pain had made me very Tired. But he had to blow up my Phone coz by Midnight he'd only been able to Walk 3 of the Miles Home and knew the rest of 7 would take him 'til 1:00 in the Morning and he'd have to call in and miss Work!!! Luckily he called 3 times and I finally heard the Phone and woke up to go get him. It was understandable he was Mad, since, he'd spent the Money they'd agreed upon for the round Trip, she got her Cigs and knew she then would be short on Gas and wouldn't be able to go get him as agreed upon. So a lot of Drama ensued when it was time to pick him up and he made the Phone Call and she rescinded picking him up even after he'd already spent the Money agreed upon Buying what she insisted to use the Money for rather than Gas! And probably why she was blowing up my Phone earlier, but I was Asleep. She knew he'd have to Call me for a Ride and was trying to get out Ahead of what had transpired I Suspect?
Getting an Uber would have cost him the Trip Twice if he could even get one to pick him up, sometimes too late, especially on a Weekday, you can't always to some locations. And what was the Point of accepting a Free Concert Ticket if it cost him $75-$100 for a relatively short ride there and back by Vehicle? At least he did get Home safely, he was gonna offer me Gas Money, but I said it was Okay 7 Miles there and back wasn't that much driving and the Roads were deserted coz they're under construction and it was really late. I don't blame him for being Mad at her but told him, No Drama, Okay? He agreed not to have a Dust Up with her over it but he's kinda Done, coz apparently Arguments have been initiated over differences of Opinion and I know how she can be like a Dog with a Bone about pushing her Opinion. For me I end any potential for a difference of Opinion with a Simple, "You could be right..." and just End it there... so my Peace isn't disturbed or disrupted. *LOL* I don't Care enuf about anyone's Opinion to Argue about it Honestly, if I don't Agree and they can't seem to Agree to even Disagree. *Smiles*
She has a Strong Personality and he's kind of Done with her tho', the reasons are mounting, and she needs to know if you give your Word to someone you should Honor it and not rescind it. Especially after they've already Honored their part and Paid you. And now you alter the Arrangements. The Arrangement was never to Pay for her Cigs, it was to Pay for her Gas to ensure she had enuf Gas. Anyway, so now she's on the Outs with him, and with The Daughter apparently, she's burning her Bridges with them and neither of them wants to be around her. They're finding her too difficult to get along with and understanding why her own Family may be having a hard time getting along with one another too perhaps? Especially if they're all like this, Argumentative and Opinionated to an Extreme? I'm getting along with her Fine, and she has Honored the Agreement we had and Paid me Today what we had Agreed upon once she got Paid. So, I have no complaints about that aspect of our Arrangement.
I told her if it doesn't Work Out, no hard feelings, make other Arrangements is all. But, she has to learn how to better get along and play well with others around here or she's going to continue to have Relationship Problems with those closest to her I think. She's burned Bridges with her Family, but, they are quite the Train Wreck so I can't fault her fully for that whole dysfunctional dynamic they've always had. I have discussed this with her already about how she's likely messing up her Relationships on her end. Like my Friend Tina used to, she tends to become Argumentative and have Strong, often Stubborn Opinions that not everyone will Agree with. And then even Argue that they're not Arguing! *LOL* People do get fed up with regular conversations becoming Arguments, or even Debates all the time, for no good reason, it's exhaustive Emotionally and Relationally. Everything doesn't have to be confrontational or a Debate over everyday discussions. Do you wanna be Right or have Peace? I personally always choose Peace. Opinions are like Assholes, we all have One and nobody wants to be Exposed to someone else's. *Winks*
My Adorable Friend Minnie just turned 51 and she's still Fabulous and I swear that Woman is Ageless, she looks the same as she did in her 20's, I Kid you not!!! She posted a couple Birthday Pixs {Above and Below} and apparently had a really nice 51st and is totally Rocking her Fifties. She's also a Beautiful Spirit on the Inside as well, the Sweetest Gal, a Great Mother and Wife. She was Adopted and is wonderful to her Adoptive Parents and has a great Relationship with them. She doesn't know much about her Birth Parents other than her Mom being a Native American Tribal Member and that she was Born at the Indian Hospital and given up for Adoption at Birth. So, she too is a Registered Tribal Member even tho' her Adoptive Parents are not Native Americans. She has Three Adorable Kiddos. The Oldest she had by a failed 1st Marriage to an abusive Asshole, but her 2nd Husband is a Good Man and Adopted her Oldest and Raised her as his own, the Two Youngest are theirs together. They are a Lovely Family.
Anyway, I'm Hoping that Tomorrow The Niece doesn't go on about trying to sway me about what happened between her and The Son and try to Justify what she did. My Opinion will definitely not Square with hers, he Honored what they Agreed to in front of me before they even left the House and she didn't Honor her part, period. He spent the Money and had it been for the Gas, and she used it for Gas and not Cigarettes, she'd of had enuf to go get him too, as AGREED upon. Not Stranded late at Night 10 Miles from Home on a Night he has to be up early for Work the next Day!!! And then have to Wake me up to go get him coz he was exhausted after Walking 3 Miles coz he'd gone to Work that Day at 5:00 in the Morning and will have to be at Work by 5:00 a.m. Tomorrow Morning too. He never likes to call in to Work unless he's actually Sick and make lame excuses to a Boss over something other than Illness to miss Work. At least it was an excellent Concert and he appreciated Garrett giving him the Ticket so it wasn't Wasted.
I have to Work Tomorrow Night myself so the last thing I want is any Drama and a Headache between any of the Kiddos. *Eye Roll* So, I Hope she doesn't engage with The Son and just leaves him alone and stays in her own Lane and drops it, so she doesn't set him off again. He doesn't want to discuss it anymore, but he also doesn't want anything to do with her now either. And until he feels differently, and The Daughter, I think she needs to just respect that the estrangement is due to something she's either said or done that has caused a Rift. Perhaps it can be resolved later, but right now it can't and that's gonna be somewhat awkward. Allen learned that the hard way too when he couldn't always get along and play well with others. Now he's trying much harder and we all saw that and so everyone let him know we are willing to work things out, but he HAS to do his part or we're just not having it. So far, so good, with Allen. Some people do have problems in their Relationships and if it's ALL of them, they really do have to see and Own that the common denominator is THEM.
If every single one of your Relationships is failing or faltering, your Estrangements are with everyone you know, then chances are that YOU could be the Problem. *Smiles and Winks* Being introspective can be hard to face sometimes and make necessary changes. Allen and The Niece are really decent people and have Good Hearts. And usually have the best of Intentions... but the Road to Hell is paved with Good Intentions. If you just are Socially awkward and don't Read The Room, then it really becomes problematic in Life tho' and in interactions with other people. I think they both tend to lack the Ability to Read The Room. His is due to Autism mostly, that's obvious, I know The Niece struggles with Mental Health Issues, most of her Family does, I don't know what her Formal Diagnosis has been. I do know it seems to interfere with her ability to function optimally tho', she's wicked Smart, but being Brilliant can sometimes be at the expense of having Normal Relationships. A lot of Brilliant Minds are quite Weird, different, and Socially Awkward in how they relate... it Isolates them.
Anyway, since she and my Kiddos have been like Cousins their entire Lives, I'm Hopeful they can manage reconciliation, but I'm not getting involved in them working it out, or not. It's up to them what they do and who they want to be around, or not be around if it's too difficult or too high maintenance. I have told The Niece her intensity can be overwhelming so try to Dial it back some and perhaps that might make for easier interactions with other people? I Love her dearly so want her to be able to sort out problems she's experiencing with people that I know she genuinely Cares about. But, you can't have Relationships FOR other folks, that's on them to work out for themselves as best they are able to. People in general are complex Beings, each Unique and different in their own ways of just Being.
I accept that with each Individual, but there are some that I don't want a lot of contact with if it's too draining for me too... so, I Get It. I'm more blunt about telling someone when they're Too Much and to just Dial it back or we can't spend too much, if any, Time together if they can't. *LOL* I made it clear to The Niece, no Talk about Religion, especially Jehovah's Witness stuff, not Interested in Cult Religions or Religions being pushed. I think all the formative Years she spent being one really Mind Fucked her and deprogramming may take a Lifetime now to get it out of her Head. That Cultish Mentality persists even after they leave, and how pushy they always are about everything, not just their Religion. She was only about 15 when she separated from her Family and the JW's encouraged that. It was like Child Abduction coz one let her move in with their Family, and I remember it put her Dear Mother thru a lot. She even tried to press Charges that a Cult was Brainwashing her Child and she wanted to get her back. The Family had a similar Situation with the Youngest Daughter, but by another Family, that they thought were Friends.
That whole thing with the Youngest was actually legitimately illegal. They befriended Two Families, I even met both Families and spent time with them, I never even imagined they'd do what they did! One Family had a Daughter Dying of Brain Cancer who was a Young Teen and the Best Friend of their Youngest Daughter. They had an Older Son who was Grown and my Friends Youngest Daughter had a Tween Crush on him, she was a Minor, only 14, he was in his 20's. Well, both of these Families moved to Georgia and invited my Friend's Youngest to come spend the Summer with the Dying Daughter, coz it was to be her last Summer. So, my Friend allowed it for Dying Christina's sake. Well, her Daughter never came back Home! Even after Christina had Died, it was like Christina's Family replaced her with my Friend's Daughter, very fucking demented and Creepy as fuck!
And it was discovered that their Adult Son was having relations with her! Which, was Statutory Rape and Child Abduction, since they had taken her across State Lines and allowed this illegal Relationship! Under the pretense of having her come to spend time with their Tween Dying Daughter, also Age 14, deceiving her Family to get their permission for only a brief Summer visit! Which constitutes Child Sex Trafficking coz they knew their Son was having intimacy with a 14 Year old in their Care and was their Responsibility her Family had entrusted them with her Safety and Well Being. And were evading her Family trying to get her back!!! Of coarse the Tween thought she was in Love, so was resistant now to leaving. Their Daughter Died and frankly I thought they intentionally 'took' her as a replacement 'Daughter'!
She eventually Married their Son and had her Two Children by him, giving them Grandchildren!!! Quite the Drama, they're now Divorced. And that Youngest Daughter never did reconcile with her own Family and saw nothing Wrong with what happened and that she'd been exploited. And the Dysfunction in her own Family didn't help matters. I never realized the levels of Dysfunction even tho' I'd been Best Friends with their Mom for Years. She never confided about the problems behind closed doors with her Husband, tho' I never liked him and thought him to be a Strange Person that I didn't particularly Trust. But I totally Trusted my Friend and didn't think she'd put any of the Children at risk, mine or hers. I also had no idea she was dealing with Domestic Abuse, she was 6' tall and her Husband smaller, shit, I could have kicked his Ass and he was Afraid of me, and of The Man once we got Married... she was Head and Shoulders Taller than me! The Man also had no idea their Family was such a Hot Mess behind Closed Doors! Sometimes you just never know.
My Kids and their Kids were very close from practically Birth, so we were like extended Family and still are. They knew me when I was Unmarried and Single, when I was Married to my Psycho Ex 1st Husband, and knew I kicked his Ass to the curb when the Relationship became Toxic, Unsafe and potentially dangerous becoz tho' Charming and Popular, he was a Psychopath as it turns out. It happens, even to Careful People, so I'm not Judging. Many Families don't let on the Darker Side of their Family Lives, they hide and are ashamed when the Illusion of a Functional Happy Family is just that, all Illusionary or goes Bad. It wasn't until my Friend Died that her Oldest Daughter and even MY Daughter told me things they didn't want me to know becoz they were fearful I'd go Mental on my Friend's Husband for being an abusive Asshole in Private, and that he drank a lot and was Mentally very unstable. The Daughter knew I wouldn't allow my Kids over there if I'd known, so, all the Kiddos kept it a Secret, like my Friend did. Perhaps she thought our Cherished Friendship would End?
The same with another very close Lifelong Best Friend who was a Single Parent and The Daughter spent a lot of time with. Coz our Daughters were also Best of Friends growing up, and her Kiddo was an Only Child. I even allowed The Daughter to go on Vacations with this Family, thinking all was Well, perfectly Safe and in Order! In all the Years, Decades, I never knew that when she'd have my Child over for Sleepovers or on Vacations, she'd often leave the Girls alone and go out all Night!!! Sometimes not even coming Home! They were apparently told not to 'Tell' coz she knew I'd lose my shit if I knew she was leaving the Kiddos Unsupervised and Alone, when I'd entrusted my Child to her Care!!! I'd rather she had asked me to Babysit her Kid instead, if she needed or wanted to go out! But some Parents don't think leaving Kids Unsupervised or Alone is Wrong, or Justify it being 'necessary', Latchkey Kids do abound. Sometimes you just never fucking know the Secrets people keep, even if you think you 'know' them, you can't always know everything about them and their habits that aren't acceptable to you!
The Daughter... and even The Niece... only told me fairly recently about all this, seemed all the Kiddos knew, but never 'Told'. Mostly coz they knew I'd go Postal if I Knew or mebbe wouldn't be Friends anymore with their Parents? And, to be Fair, I would have gone Ballistic! When I found out this Single Parent Friend and her Daughter are estranged now and I couldn't understand Why, coz I'd imagined them to have always been very Close, an only Child raised by a Single Mom who seemed to dote on her, from what I'd SEEN. It puzzled me and I brought it up to The Daughter and asked her if she Knew the Friend and her Daughter weren't close at all? But, it was what was UNSEEN that apparently was the Issue, and my Daughter said, Oh, I KNOW Why!!! And then spilled the Tea and said, Well, it's so many Years ago now that I figure you won't go on the Warpath, but I always knew you definitely would if you'd of Known Mom, so we didn't "Tell"! But she left her Kid Alone a LOT, and I was just the Companion so she'd have someone else there when her Mom always went out to do whatever with whoever!!! OMG!!! It has since led me to Believe this Person has been leading a Double Life of some kind, Secretly?
You're damned straight! Nobody is a Perfect Parent, but, we all have Parenting Boundaries not to be violated or Trust Broken. Especially with or about our own Precious Kids!!! And Kids shouldn't have to Keep Secrets about Adults misdeeds. So, if you have Littles still, make sure they know that no Adult should insist or threaten that they keep "Secrets". We're only ever as Sick as our Secrets and that's too much to burden any Child with, ever! It really can make you Distrustful when you realize how much you don't Know about people, no matter how long you've Known them tho'! The deceptiveness can be shocking, and Misplaced Trust can blindside you sometimes. I've always thought I was perceptive, discerning, and a decent Judge of Character and someone's Moral Compass. But there's a lot of folks who Clean Up Well in Public and in Private you may discover are a fucking Hot Mess, Unstable or Unsafe in their ways, or an absolute Train Wreck. And Who knew... or... didn't "Tell"???
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Sometimes Real Life has the Scariest of Stories... Dawn... The Bohemian
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