Inhale... Exhale... Don't Hyperventilate... Clockwork Orange Goes To DC

I'm sure all could tell by my last ranty epic length and Manic Post, that was Triggered by the whole Political devolvement of America, that I wasn't in my best Head Space.  *Bwahahaha and Winks*  I was Writing about everything and nothing at the same time, but it was a nice Emotional and Mental decompression Release and needed.  *Whew*  Inhale, Exhale... don't Hyperventilate.  *Smiles*  I try to keep on the Rails and not go Wheels Off due to circumstances beyond all our Control.  I'm a Control Freak, so, acknowledging it's beyond my Sphere of Real Influence, much of it, is somewhat Helpful.  You can only do what you can do, and Let Go of and Release the rest, so you Cope appropriately.

The Son has been in Mental Chaos lately and had ranted in the Morning that he couldn't find his Beef Jerky to take to Work, he was having a complete Meltdown about it.  Guess where it was?  In the Back Seat of the Truck!!!  His Dad found it later in the Day and thought it was his, luckily I confiscated it so he wouldn't eat it!  The Daughter had to take it away from her Dad later when he forgot again, NOT his!  *LOL and Whew*  The Son must have had to carry it TO the Truck and tossed it back there in the Morning, just about the same time he's panicking about not being able to find it!!!   *LMAO*  This is Classic Behavior for him, ADHD, Autism and being Bipolar is an interesting Mixed Bag to Manage and some Days he even Succeeds.  *Winks*

He's gone to Gypsy James' again after Work so they can work on his Car and get that part installed that they got the day before.  Let's keep all Body Parts Crossed that they get it running, he drives it Home without incident, and my Mom Uber obligation comes to a close?   This Three in the Morning Gig is already wearing on me and making me more Manic, well, coupled with... well, you all know what's going on in D.C. and L.A. that keeps devolving daily and Triggering me.  Precious Pixs sent of Family keep me Grounded, above is Oldest Granddaughter in Pittsburgh and her Oldest Daughter, who was in a Dance Recital.

She has a Fan Girl, in her Younger Sister, who clearly Loved the Performance of Big Sis.  *Smiles*  The Man wanted to go do Environmental Cleanup and we really hauled a lot of Aluminum Cans out of the Natural Desert Roadside and quit once the Triple Digits hit.  It seemed Humid, and tho' I can take the Arizona Heat, Humidity is The Devil.   And, being The Man's Caregiver, I have to assess his tolerance, since, he just can't anymore.  He voluntarily took a Shower when we got Home, without being reminded to, so I knew he'd had enuf Fun and we'd wrapped it up when we should have.  *Smiles*  The Older Granddaughter Back East finally updated us with recent Pixs of her and Two of the Oldest Great-Grands.  Color me Happy.

The Man can't remember who they all are now, so he's only mildly Interested, but I still show him and explain they're ours.  *LOL*  I got The Man an Ornate Renaissance Style Knife in an Ornate Metal Sheath with Jewels on it at SAVERS where the Granddaughter Works, when I picked her up after Work.  It matches the Sword he got there a few Weeks ago and I wonder if the same person Donated both and there was just a delay/lag in the one piece hitting the Floor and being in their Locked Case?  He was more Jazzed about said Knife than about Pixs of Grands and Great-Grands, when I Surprised him with it, and since it was Senior Discount Day, it only cost me $17 for his Joy for the Day. *Winks*

For myself I found a Medical Teaching Prop Cadaver Hand and Wrist like you'd see at an Orthopedics Office or perhaps to Teach Future Medical Students.  It's articulated of coarse, and looks like a real Skeletal Hand and Wrist, mounted on a nice Round Wood Base.  It was only Two Bucks, and joins my Weird and Wonderful Collection of Medical Oddities, Booyah!  You know what a Weirdo I am, Scoring shit like that makes my Macabre Black Heart skip a beat.  *LOL*

I also found an Antique Glass Bottle with raised embossed Makers Name of "Rawleigh's" on the front, that is probably from the turn of the Century or thereabouts.   That was also Two Bucks, Score!!!   It's not worth a whole lot and isn't Rare, but definitely a lot more than I got it for, when I checked Online Prices.  We've Collected Old and Unusual Bottles for Years, I didn't have one like this.   I often use my Old Bottles to Display a Single Flower or other Simple Greenery in.

Princess T had ushered me inside rather than meeting me outside coz she wanted me to buy her a couple things.   She's really good about reimbursing me when I Front her for purchases, and she's good with Money, so I'm very Proud of her.  The other Kiddos aren't, and neither is The Man, it's not a strength of theirs to Manage Money.  So they Trust me to help them with it, or they'd all be broker all the time.  I Debt Counseled folks in Financial Crisis all the time in my 1st Corporate Life as a Bank Executive.  So, it's not uncommon for people to suck at Managing Money. {Footnote: Asian Handmade 1980's Cabbage Patch Style Doll called "Aunt Betty's Kids" and Dated 1984.  Paid $3 for her... Online they're around $30 with Passport, which I'm Missing.}

Either you find it easy to Manage Money or you don't.  I was that Kid that at an early Age was making Loans to my Parents coz I always had Money and worked my Hustle.  When they got Older I tried, in Vain I might add, to set up their Retirement Planning for them.  They blew thru it and it was their Money, so, whaddya gonna do?   I tried.  *Le Sigh*  Clients I worked with in my Banking Life were either in Collections, Foreclosure or Bankruptcy, and ready to lose everything, including their Homes, some you could Help and others were a Lost Cause.  {Footnote: Vintage Land O Lakes Red Wing Stoneware Butter Crock Scored for $3.  Value varies widely Online, but, all quite spendy.}

The same when I got into Criminal Law in the 2nd Corporate Life, some Folks can turn Life around and Walk in the Light, others just can't and won't.  And a Career Criminal particularly, it's what they do and who they just are.   This is Why Donnie Two Dolls will never Change, it's what he does and who he just is.  Plus, he's led a Charmed Life in the doing of it, so there's been no real deterrent and lots of incentive becoz it's profited him handsomely, and still is.  The Big Grift and Long Con is working out just dandy for him, why would he Stop?!

You always hold out some Hope that doing the Right Thing will eventually Pay Off too, but, let's be Real, sometimes it doesn't.  Bad things still happen to Good People all the time, Fair is Rare.  I can't Square it to incentivize any of you to still walk in the Light and do what's Right, it has to be what you do and who you just are.  That's pretty much it when it comes to People... what they do and who they are becomes apparent.  I won't say they can't Change, for the better or the worse, but, it's an Inside Job for them to sort out within themselves.

 

Above is our Hot Pool Guy, Brad, who owns the Company.  Now poor Brad has to Clean our Pool himself, coz I ran off his Younger Employee when I forgot it was Pool Cleaning Day and was Skinny Dipping and accidentally exposed the Young Guy to a Full Monty.  *LOL*  He was about the Age of our Grandsons, Twenty-Something, first Day on the Job, first Pool, Bless his Heart.  I knew the poor thing would never be back.  *Bwahaha*  Told The Man and Princess T, well, I think Brad will be Cleaning our Pool from now on, he's a Decade Older and has probably seen everything there is to see while Cleaning Pools by now?  *LMAO*  I apologized to Brad, he said, well, it's not the 1st time that happens in the Business.

 I hadn't intentionally traumatized his Guy, forgot it was a Monday, that's all.   As an Old Hippie, I wasn't inhibited or embarrassed, just felt bad for the Kid, you can't Unsee what was Seen, you know?   He may have reconsidered his Career Choice and Path after that, I dunno?  *LOL*  Nope, not going back to the Old Hippie's House Boss... *Bwahahaha*  I now try to remember not to Nude Swim on Mondays.   I usually won't if The Son or Grandsons were Home either, they don't need to see that.  But, I don't Care if The Daughter or Granddaughter are Home, I warn them in advance and we all have Lady Bits, so, not so awkward.   Well, mebbe a little for Princess T, she's our Modest and most Inhibited Female, The Daughter and I are definitely NOT.  *Winks*

It's Wednesday Morning now and I have a Dental appointment at 11:00 a.m. that had been delayed 6 Months due to my Stroke in December.  They won't do any Dental Work, not even Cleanings, after a Stroke, so we had to re-schedule my Cleaning and Exam, which was fine.  I don't have any lingering Dental Issues, I'm pretty fanatical about my Teeth, always have been OCD about Dental Hygiene.  I just Wish I had Whiter Teeth but my Dentist explained to me that Tooth Color and the Whites of your Eyes should match in Shade of Whiteness.  I didn't realize that and my Teeth and Eye Whites do indeed match, so, it's not that my Teeth should Naturally be Whiter.

 

The Son rolled in from Gypsy James' House around 10:00 p.m. last Night in his Car.  But before I could get excited about that, he explained it took a shit on the drive Home and isn't fixed!   Dammit!   He was so upset coz he's spent Hundreds on these Repairs now, and it just has different things that then keep failing, he should just put a Daisy on it at this point, it's a Money Pit.   They spent all day after Work putting the Fuel Pump in and that seemed to do the trick.  Then when he was almost Home something 'blew' and he barely limped it Home.  At least he got it Home before it Died again, so he's not stranded somewhere and has to get another Tow.  It will never to be resurrected by us, he's gonna give it back to James, along with the Vintage Celica, and work out something mutually agreeable to have James get him a Used Truck, like I suggested.

 

He doesn't have good Credit and his Job is iffy right now in Hours, but Gypsy James will let him work off whatever extra a Truck would cost, coz he often needs The Son to help him with Projects.  So, I think they'll be able to figure something out to get him back on the Road with affordable Transportation.  Gypsy James Buys and Sells Vehicles regularly as a Side Income, he's always got streams of income when The Trades are Soft, he's a Cabinet Maker by Trade, but a Mechanic too, and has been trying to get The Son to do Side Work anyway for extra Income.   The difference between them being that Gypsy James is a Workaholic, like The Man used to be, and Guys like that can't NOT be busy Working at something and doing One, Two, or even Three Jobs all the time!  *Smiles*

 

The Son is Hyper and has Adult ADHD, so he's no slouch by any means. By himself he can usually do the Work of 2-5 other Employees, and all his Bosses have marveled at his productivity and accuracy when he does anything.   But, he said he likes having some Down Time too and he knows Partnering with Projects that Gypsy James sets up, there won't be any Down Time.  *LOL*   But, he'll do it for a while to get that Truck to replace these Two Non-Functional Cars that then can be Chopped for the Sum of their Parts, which is where their Value is, especially the Vintage Celica, which doesn't have a Title and he doesn't wanna bother getting a Salvage Title and fixing it up either, too Expensive.   But, anyone Restoring one could and would buy it's Parts.

So, anyway, THAT didn't have the Happy Ending we anticipated after he'd spent another $100 and spent so much Time working on it.  So, I'm still getting up at Three in the Morning to rendezvous with his Boss at the Convenience Store for now.  It's a good thing I've been on a Manic Bender with my Mental Health so that I don't Sleep much, since, otherwise the Sleep deprivation would kick my Ass.   I do take Naps, and when you're Manic you require less Sleep, hard to explain to anyone whose not afflicted with Bipolar I Condition as their Normal.  I used to have people ask me all the time why I never seemingly got Tired, even as I became Old... and you just can't explain the Why when you have ADHD and are Bipolar, they wouldn't Understand.

We do experience Fatigue, however Individuals with Comorbid ADHD and Bipolar I Disorder experience and express Energy Levels in a different way that can be complex.  Your Manic Episodes you'll experience increased Energy, Racing Thoughts, a reduced Need for Sleep and potentially Risky Behaviors, along with extreme Mood Swings, including Mania and Hypomania... yeah, Fun Times.  *Bwahahahaha*  I Thankfully have mostly had Manic Episodes and not the Depressed Episodes as much, tho' I do have Mixed Episodes and the Depression Ones are absolutely No Fun and can go pretty Deep, Dark and Ominous.  Anyway the heightened Energy can be mistaken for not Feeling Tired, when it's in fact part of a distinct Mood State.

 

 

Combine that Condition with ADHD, where that Hyperactivity and Restlessness is a more consistent Trait rather than an episodic Mood Change.   Having both does increase the risk of Suicidal Behavior so I've always had to be Guarded about that since I do have a higher level of disruptive Behavior due to both disorders.   Blogging actually has been like a Good Therapy to bang out on the keyboard a lot of what otherwise might be more disruptive Behaviors in Real Life used as Coping Mechanisms.   Mental Health Management Meds didn't Work well for me, I became quite volatile and violent on Psychotropics and very quickly, so they always had to be discontinued immediately.  *LOL*  I've lived like this Med Free for almost Seven Decades now, so I just learned how to Manage myself in more Holistic ways.   I can be very clever being Solution oriented.  *Winks*

And here's an Interesting Tidbit regarding Mental Health... a lot of Women remain Undiagnosed becoz Females are more adept as Masking a Mental Health Condition!   So, it is often thought some Conditions afflict more Males becoz of that, but, it probably doesn't, and that includes Autism and that whole Spectrum.   I've always thought I had undiagnosed Autism of some kind on the Spectrum, since I have always Stimmed... A LOT.  Stimming is repetitive ritualistic movements, sounds or other behaviors  that a person engages in to regulate their Emotions, Cope with Sensory input, or Self-Soothe.  I have always done Stimming and most Autistics do... but, you don't have to be Autistic to exhibit it to varying degrees, so it wasn't conclusive I had Autism.  It wasn't ruled out either.  When I was Young some Pediatricians mistook the Stimming for having Seizures.  I don't think I have Seizures.  *LOL* 

But, I do Shake a LOT and especially if I'm concentrating on anything and need to Focus.  *LOL*   I didn't even realize how much I shook until I saw myself doing it on a Video!  During a time I was Anxious coz someone was fiddling with my Camera filming me and I got Anxious they might break it, as I walked over to show them what to do.  *LOL*   I Wish I could load that Video here on the Ole Blog, it makes me LOL to this Day and all the Family claimed, well, Yeah, you didn't know you've ALWAYS done that?!  No, No I didn't, I looked like one of those Marionettes on Strings... or, someone winding up to have a Seizure!!!   So, no Wonder my Pediatricians were confused!!!  *Bwahahaha*

So, my Dental Appointment went well, I didn't expect that it wouldn't.  I don't know why Dental visits make me Anxious, but they do.  I have an excellent Dentist, Dr. Rau is wonderful, experienced and personable, so really no reason to have Anxiety.  *LOL*   Everything was good, no problems.   I picked up To Go from the Fish N Chips Shop for Princess T and The Man.  Princess T was Home Sick Today and that's her Comfort Food, "Ed's Fish N Chips", she gets the Catfish N Chips with Red Sauce, The Man gets the Scallops N Chips with White Sauce.  As for myself, I had Pork Chops at "Waffle House" and brought Home a Strawberry Shortcake Waffle for The Daughter, which is a new thing on their Menu.  They make the best Pork Chops, which aren't on the Menu, it's the Secret Menu you have to know about.

Aren't they a thing of Beauty?   So many places don't know how to Cook a good Pork Chop and I'm very picky about it, they have to be juicy and well seasoned, covering them while Cooking is the Secret.  Which, the Cooks there know exactly how it should be done.   And it's an inexpensive Meal there, sometimes all I want is the Protein and I'm good, Today was a day such as that, just the Pork Chops, nothing else.  Below is what the Strawberry Shortcake Waffle looked like before I put it in a To-Go Box for The Daughter.   I took a Taste of the Crumbles, which had a Yoghurt Coating in Strawberry and Vanilla flavor and were soft and tasty.   So, the Family is well fed now and Happy, plus I don't have to Cook.  *Winks*

The Grandkids in Mexico, Two of them, sent me long messages in Spanish and I can read some Spanish but am not fluent and forgot how to get it to translate, so will have to get The Daughter to read it and find out what they wanted us to know?   I know it's something about School and their Dad, that's the gist of it I was able to cobble together with my limited knowledge of Spanish.   He's apparently out again and I'm not sure how I feel about that coz it creates problems for the Kiddos when he is.   He sends me Friend requests but I no longer accept them, I really don't want contact, he's got too much serious baggage in his Life that I don't want spilling into ours, nuff said.

Everything is in Bloom in the Desert but it's now gotten too Hot to go out and enjoy it.  It's 105 right now, so, only somewhat Cooler than the 111 it was a couple Days ago.   I mostly stay inside after Early Morning unless I HAVE to be somewhere.  And, I try to schedule any Appointments really early too.   I don't have to go back to the Dentist now until January of 2026.   I've had minimal Dental needs for 2025 and Medicare Advantage does cover a lot of Dental Work Annually which is a Blessing if you do need more Work done than preventative Dental Maintenance.   TriCare For Life doesn't cover any Dental for me thru our Military Dependent Coverage.  

 They used to, but Earned Benefits have eroded or ceased almost continuously for Veterans and their Dependents.  This is Why I'm opposed to the Eighty Plus Million of Taxpayer Dollars they'll Waste on an extravagant Military Parade on this Draft Dodging President's Birthday, pretending it's Honoring the Military or Veterans, whilst cutting even more Veteran Benefits that were EARNED.   We will not watch any Coverage of the Authoritarian Style Show of Force Parade, and I hear there are Massive National Protests that will happen Nationwide in opposition to it, I will watch coverage of the Protests.   Otherwise I will be Triggered and lose my Shit watching any of the Fuckery he and his Minions are engaging in Daily and escalating on purpose to agitate and provoke decent Citizens and Non-Citizens.  It's in Satan's Playbook to Incite People to Wrath, which is one of the Seven Deadly Sins.

As for the Army having it's Anniversary, a Happy Anniversary should suffice, it doesn't need an Eighty Million Plus Dollar Price Tag IMO.  Not when Waste is ALLEGEDLY being trimmed in Government with massive Cuts to crucial Programs people NEED and Federal Job Losses of Public Servants who have done their Jobs Honorably and Served the People.  I hear that Anti-Vaxxer Conspiracy Theorist Worm Brain Fired all 17 of the the Vaccine Advisory entire Staff now, Splendid!  Just when you think they can't possibly cock up things any more than they already have, they hit a new low, with no bottom in sight.  It's as if The Clockwork Orange {1971 Dystopian Crime Film} has gone to D.C. and is being acted upon for Real in America!

*******

Stay sane my friends thru the insanity... dawn... the bohemian