Each Day Has Enuf To Get Thru Without Looking Back or Forward Too Far Either

 My Dental Appointment went well, no problems.  I'm only allowed 2 Cleanings Annually on my Insurance and I really need 3 with being a Diabetic, so my Dentist is trying to figure out a way to stagger them around the turning of a New Year to get a 3rd in covered.  *LOL*  Hey, they know how Insurances are, but, I also got Good News for a change too about Prescription Coverage under my New Medicare Advantage Changes.  I get a Prescription Strength Mouthwash that usually I pay out of Pocket for coz I don't get it thru Express Scripts, coz my TriCare For Life Military Insurance doesn't cover Dental. 

 The Man gets his Dental covered via the VA but Dependent Spouses get no Coverage.  So Medicare covers my Dental now.  Well, I decided, let us just see if Humana is covering Part D, coz Medicare has Administratively taken out Money for it from my Social Security Checks I've been trying to Appeal?  Well, guess what, yeah, it did!!!  So, it was covered, and I still think it's a Mistake Medicare has bunged up, but, if it covers my Rx that I don't get thru Express Scripts/Tri-Care Coverage at no Cost to me out of Pocket, I won't Appeal that shit anymore, it's worth the $14.95 a Month.  *Winks*  I can put away my War Paint now about THAT.  *LOL*

Any temporary Prescription that I can't get thru Express Scripts or from the Base Satellite Pharmacy is usually a full Civilian Cost to me before.  Well, now I'll just use Humana Advantage and have Medicare paying for it with what they're charging me for Part D.  So, either the Laws have changed where you CAN have Tri-Care AND Part D now, or, Medicare is now so screwed up they can't find their Asses with both Hands, even on Appeals where you brought it to their Attention that it could be a Mistake?  I just don't know and now I just don't Care either.  If I'm Paying for something Monthly involuntarily now, fuck 'em, I'm using it.

So, I considered that some Good News coz that One Script would have been way more than under Fifteen Bucks to fill.  And it's something I do Need and would have paid out of Pocket for.  I'm Thankful for anything that works out in the end.  *Ha ha ha*  So, Good News is just Good News any way ya cut it my Friends.  *Smiles*  My Dental Visit must have taken it out of me tho', even tho' it was only a Cleaning and Good News that I had no Dental Issues, I Needed a Nap early Afternoon again and didn't Wake Up from it until 7:00 p.m.!!!   Yikes, I'd laid down at 3:00 p.m., that was a long Nap!  The Kids made Dinner but I wasn't Hungry for any.

I only Ate once Today too at Lunch and only about 1/3 of my delicious Mongolian Beef, none of the Rice, ate the small Eggroll, and gave the rest of it to Princess T.  I hadn't had Breakfast, didn't have Dinner, and don't feel Hungry at all either.  So, The Man isn't the only one with no Appetite I guess, I'm on the same trajectory it seems!  No idea why, perhaps us both being on Ozempic may have something to do with it tho'?  You just don't feel very hungry when taking that Medication thru Weekly Injection, so it's no Wonder you lose Weight!!!  It has stabilized the Diabetes for both of us tho', which, it's meant to.  And our A1C has lowered considerably, mine's in the 6's now.

I got another smallest of the Vintage Tupperware Bowls of the Trio I'd gotten at The Granddaughter's Chazza, when I picked her up Today from Work, and it's got it's Lid.  It's the brighter Orange Color and smaller size of the Quartet of stacking Bowls, the Two other Middle Sizes without Lids I got are Two other Orange Colors and the largest of the Set without it's Lid is Yellow.  So, I need to Source the 3 Missing Lids now and may have to do it Online.  They don't Cost much on E-Bay, but, Postage is what jacks the Price up.  I'm corresponding with one Seller right now on an Auction to clarify if it's for 1 or 3 Lids?  If it's for all 3 I'll Buy-It-Now coz it's the 3 Lids I Need and reasonable for the Trio.

Work called again and asked if I'd fill-in for Jackson on Saturday Night?  He's who I filled-in for on Wednesday Night, he's on another Tropical Cruise, it's good to be Jackson and his Wife Jeri.  *LOL*  They go on several Cruises Annually, the most Cruisin' Couple I know and they Share the Experiences on their Social Media, so you can come along vicariously.  *Smiles*  I always thought I wanted to go on a Cruise, but in Reality, I wonder if I'd have a Panic Attack on the Open Water when I couldn't see Land anymore?  I think I probably would, I don't like Flying and I don't like being on Open Water with no Sight of Land.  I like my Feet on Land I guess?  *LOL*  I had Anxiety in Hawaii on a Zodiac Raft Tour and could still see Land coz it was just off the Coast of the Island of Kauai.

Of coarse during that Tour the Wild Dolphins were excited to join beside the Raft and I didn't realize Wild Dolphins are as big as a 16 Foot Zodiac Raft!!!  And playful, which, was no Fun for Raft Riders when a 16 Foot Wild Animal comes very close beside you and wants to Play with you and your 16 Foot Raft!  *Ha ha ha*  Yeah, we had our Life Vests on, but the Coastline of Kauai is rugged and Waves near that Island are Surfer's Dreams and Gigantic.  So, smashing against Rocks of the Cliffs along the Coastline rather than landing on a Sandy Beach to get to Land was a distinct possibility.  It was an Experience but I can't say it wasn't also somewhat Terrifying for Yours Truly too.  And I was Young and half my Age now, now I'm NOT.  I'd be Fish and Shark Bait.  *LOL*

Look at this Cool Upcycle Idea using Old Rake Heads and Old Rolling Pins for Storage and Display of a Watch Collection or your Bracelets.  I'm definitely Stealing this Idea coz pretty sure I have at least One Old Rake Head and definitely have some Old Rolling Pins with Colorful Handles.  I've been going down the Rabbit Hole lately of Pinterest and such for Visual Inspiration and to Lose Myself Mentally in anything Uplifting, and do a Visual Freefall that keeps me buoyed up during these turbulent Times we're presently in.  My Dental Hygienist doing my Teeth Cleaning was a Middle Aged Woman and we candidly discussed how scary the Times are. 

 I could tell she's very Anti-MAGA too, but approached the conversation with an A-Political Stance, as did I.  Both being Mindful the subject of Politics or Religion tend to make some folks fucking Mental.  *LOL*  I guess knowing she's Cleaning the Teeth of a 68 Year Old Dreadlocked Woman with Locs down to my Ass, dressed like an Old Hippie, since I had a Colorful Grateful Dead Tie Dye T-Shirt on and Okabashi Flip Flops on, she felt Safe I wasn't MAGA?  *Bwahahahaha*  She said her 21 Year Old Son does great Donnie Two Dolls Comedic Impersonations and mine does too, so we Laughed about that.  The Son also does Spot On Impersonations of everyone actually, he's very Good and sounds just like them and exaggerates their actual Mannerisms to a Tee!

Today I did Treat myself to a Starbucks Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frappuccino.  I don't Buy them often and they've gone up in Price due to Coffee Tariffs, a Crazy Cost for a Coffee really.  So, it will remain a Rare Luxury Purchase, but it is damned good and not really a Diabetic Friendly indulgence.  But, Annually I'd say I only ever have 1-3 tops, so it's not habitual for me.  As you can see by my Black Truck, it Rained during the Night and now needs to be Washed.  Mando was gonna do it the other day for me and the Weather looked iffy again, so I told him to just wait, since, I park it Outside and not in a Garage.  Often when it Rains in the Desert you also get blowing Dust, so, Air Mud tends to be the outcome and a Black Vehicle isn't a Forgiving Color when dirty.

The next Holiday is Valentine's Day and we still have Candy from Christmas for The Man, whose a Diabetic, so I don't know I'll be getting him any Traditional Valentine's Day Gifting.  *LOL*  He's the only one in the Family with a Sweet Tooth, and half of us can't eat Chocolate, so Candy would otherwise sit around here until we gave it away or Guests ate it up.  *Smiles*  He really Loves his Snacks tho' and it's his one Guilty Indulgence he has left, so I don't deny him it in Moderation and with strict Supervision, or he'd be in a Diabetic Coma for sure.  *LMAO*  All the Candy we got at Christmastime were Gifts from Neighbors and Friends who don't know it's not something we typically partake of tho'.  I never want to seem Ungrateful for a Sincere Gift given, even if it's not appropriate for me personally. Indeed it IS the Thought that Counts.

I do hafta Price some Inventory to bring in on Saturday Night to Work, since I've picked up that Shift.  So, I'll devote myself to doing that on Friday in Real Time.  I'm still One Unpublished Post ahead so far and it will be this Post.  Mebbe.  If I get it finished in time to not be Automatically Posted instead.  *Smiles*  I have been Sleeping half my Afternoons away lately, so, not a lot is getting actually Done after Morning.  *Le Sigh*  Mornings are pretty full and busy tho', so, I'm not totally Slacking, tho' I NEED to get to The Gym with more consistency again and squeeze in an Early Morning Workout more often.  I enjoy them, but some Mornings I'm in Pain and that isn't conducive to Working Out when you Wake Up hurting Physically.  The Weather is the culprit, Cold just fucks with me in my Old Age.  And by the time it Warms Up it's Afternoon now... and I don't do Afternoon Workouts, I'm Napping.  *LOL*  I know, I'm a Hot Mess right now.

During Wednesdays Shift I did take a few Pixs, not a lot was particularly Editorial, and what was Interesting and Tempting, was Expensive.  Some Vendors still do have The Good Stuff but you're gonna hafta Stand Tall on it if you are a Buyer.  I'm not that Buyer.   I Loved the Antique Native American Doorstop in the Lead Image, the Vendor clearly Loved it more than I did tho', the Sticker Shock was a Whoa and setting it back down.  *LOL*  That Vendor has Sage Bundles at Good Prices tho' and a lot of Hippie Vibe Merch that I Like, so is probably a Kindred Spirit that I haven't yet met and is a Newer Vendor there.  I also was in Lust with that Antique Cigar Sign, authentic and the Price verified that Fact.  I'd like a Sign of that Genre for the Smoking Section on the Back Patio the Kiddos use.  The Daughter and The Son are Smokers.  I have a Black Antique Neon Sign from a Smoke Shop that says SMOKES, that we have up back there.

I'd like them to give up that Vice, not only for Health Reasons, but, coz they can't afford it.  And... I can't stand it either.  *LOL*  I have never allowed Smoking in my Home and so a lot of Friends and Family who Smoked wouldn't come to Visit coz I had that Policy.  The Man Smoked when I met him and I made it Clear that I wasn't Interested in Kissing anyone's Mouth that tasted or smelled like a Dirty Old Ashtray.  *LOL*  Plus, I had an Asthmatic Child who was Three at the time and couldn't tolerate Cigarette Smoke or he'd end up in ER.  Who knew that The Son would then grow up to become a fucking Smoker?!   He started with MJ and then went to Cigs when he was Old enuf to Buy them, Scoring Weed was easier for a Teenager I guess?  *LOL*  Coming from a Smoke Free, Alcohol Free and Drug Free Home, who knows why both Kiddos gravitated to those Vices and picked them up?  Kids!!!  And foolish forms of Rebellion I guess?

Princess T can't keep any information about herself from me so did say she once tried Alcohol and didn't like it at all so won't be picking up on that Habit.  I also know she Vapes MJ regularly, but, it helps with her Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Bipolar Moods, so, it's a Non-Issue with me and this Year she'll be Old enuf to Legally Buy it for herself rather than relying on Friends to hook her up.  *Winks*  Yeah, the Kids find a way, I'm not so Old I forget what it was like to be Young, Dumb and Broke.  *Bwahahahaha*  Plus, I Raised Two Generations of Youngsters so there's nothing they could say or do to Shock me and they know this, they've Tried, I don't even flinch.  *Winks*  And Trust & Believe, The Son and The Daughter, along with The Young Prince, have done some pretty Shocking Shit in their Crazy Lives lemme tell ya!  They got Stories.  So do I tho', and so does The Man, so, we don't pass Judgment.  Princess T is the Golden Child by comparison.  *LOL*

And she knows there's probably some Stories Gramma and Grandpa have withheld from being Told until she's over 21.  *Bwahahaha*  She knows some of the ones that can be deducted by even a Child without them being Told.   Like she knows her Grandpa was Career Military, and began that Career being a Government Assassin as a USMC Sniper Special Forces during the Vietnam Era, ergo, Body Count is high, high, high.  The Government wanted their Money's worth for the Ninety Grand or so they spent Training him to do their Dirty Deeds for them.  And that is a Sniper's Job after all, so, no Judgment or Delusions, somebody was gonna be sent to do it.  And if Ordered and given to you to carry out, it better be you or perhaps you'd be Neutralized too coz you knew too much now.   He Loves his Country but has never Trusted his Government, any of them.

And, she knows Gramma was no Saint either and when in my Turbulent Youth, ran with a very Rough Crowd.  And a lot of Career Military Crowd too, which can be on the Righteous Side of Rough as well.  *Winks*  I've known Bad Actors who were Outlaw Bikers and Serious Gang Members that were my Friends in the Old Days and had my Back more than most Good Actors would have.  I've also had a Successful Career at the DA's Office, I'm quite a contradiction and dichotomy of Lifestyle and Experiences, you might say.   I've seen the Good Side of Bad and the Downside of Up and everything In Between, as Everlast's Lyrics have said.  I've led a very Colorful Life and have no regrets about that, it's made me very well Rounded and Street Smart, you might say.  An Education that can't be Bought, it must be Survived.   *Bwahahahaha & Winks*

The Man is having a very Bad Day, he's overly Anxious and Depressed without even watching The News.  He's been feeling like the 39 Years he Served his Country and made Personal Sacrifices that nobody should have to make, protecting Freedom, Democracy and Decency, was for nothing now.  It's unraveled in 12 Months of this Cowardly Draft Dodging Senile Lunatics 2nd shot at the White House.  And none of his Cabal is any better, so he's just the Head of the Snake that must be cut off.  The Doom and Gloom I personally Feel is palpable, what's Coming is gonna be very Bad for America, you Mark my Words.  And I can't just ignore it and say nothing, or pretend all is Well, I just can't.  I see a lot of people doing that tho', as if there's no Trouble in fucking Paradise, it's Surreal to me how Checked Out most Americans seem to be and Acting like it.

I've Shared some Fluffy Imagery to take The Edge Off of not being able to Write Fluff Posts, Sorry, NOT Sorry about it, the Content expresses Truths some won't or can't Face and I don't Care really.  They'll be Dealing with it regardless of trying to Hide from it and keep Eyes Wide Shut tightly.   And that becomes part of The Problem, by it's complicity and it's Silence or indifference and ambivalence.   It reminds me of those National Geographic Nature Films where Herd Animals that are Prey seem completely oblivious and unawares of the Predators that are Stalking them and in their midst.  So will make a Meal of them as they Graze and don't pay close enuf attention to their surroundings and dangers lurking nearby and Targeting any of them.  Some will therefore not Make it.  Natural Selection at Work in it's most Basic Form.  We're not so Elevated and Enlightened as a Species that Natural Selection won't pick some of us off either.

I know, I'm not a Ray of fucking Sunshine this Day and why I Nap part of the Day away.   So I won't be a Black Cloud pissing on everyone's little Picnic as a Big Storm is coming that makes my little Black Cloud seem fucking Quaint!  And they're happily ignoring all Signs of pending Dangers and so, some won't Make it.   I can almost predict with accuracy, which ones it will be too.   I have enuf Predator and Perception in me not to be easy Prey for anyone or anything I Guess, even the Apex Predators of Society?   I can pick them out too.  It's rather Instinctual and I don't even have to Try to.   I'll be like, Yep, there's One.  Stay away from that One and keep your Eye on 'em.  *LOL*

I'm trying to Cheer Up, sometimes I even Succeed.  *Bwahahaha*  I got a Cheech and Chong Wallet for The Daughter at SAVERS while picking up her Daughter Today from Work.  I deliberately lay such things around the House to see how quickly ole' "Real Eyes" will Spy it and ask me whose it is?  *Winks*  She's got Eyes like a Rat, that one, and it's Fun and rather like a Game to me, to see how damned Fast she Notices everything brought in?  *Ha ha ha*    And she was Laughing at the one 1980's Dressed Big Troll I just Bought that's wearing an Outfit like her Brother used to Wear when he was a Kid... I thought so too... and The Son said, Yeah, he remembers wearing that exact Fishnet Tank Top with huge Cutouts at the Sleeves and similar Shorts!!!  Great for Autistic Kiddos who claim Buttons, long Pants and Sleeves "Hurt", but will pull their own fucking Fingernails off without flinching!!!   *Bwahahahaha*

I did finally eat a Burrito that The Daughter made for me, it Smelled so damned good and aromatic around the House that she coaxed me into devouring one.  *LOL*  Her Dad won't eat tho' and did confide to us all that he's having a very Bad Day and we could tell, but there's not much we can do about it to offer comfort or encouragement.  Dementia as it advances, is a very Cruel Disease for everyone involved.  As his Full Time Caregiver, it pains me to see him suffering from it like he does and as it worsens.  He's a Good Guy and it's taking him away from us in layers and it's not my First Rodeo with Caregiving for someone who has it, I Lost my Mom that way too, but she was a Decade Older than he is.  Her Onset was later in her 70's so she made it to 84 before succumbing to it. 

He's watching his "Homestead Rescue" Show, which is Reruns, but he doesn't Care, he Loves that Show.   And seeing how many foolish Families have to be Rescued who decided to Live like it's 1880 and have no Clue how to do so successfully, so have to be Rescued or risk perishing from their ignorance and pipedreams not tethered to Reality.  I can't Believe how many folks take their entire Families out like that without having the knowledge or experience to Live that way with any Measure of Success or Critical Thinking!!!  If you grew up that way, you'd have Ancestral Knowledge passed down for Generations, to Survive the Lifestyle, if not, you're taking huge Risks and don't know what you're even doing.  I therefore don't like the Show, the Rainey's in some Cases, should tell those folk to just go back to Civilization and what they Know.  Of coarse, I do often think some of those folks didn't cut it in Modern Society either and why they imagined going Off Grid would work???  *Eye Roll*

Listen, if you can't hold down a Regular Job at all, afford a Mortgage or Rent on your own, or Buy Groceries, I Guess the Fantasy of Living Wild might Appeal to you for a Minute?   Til Reality slaps you upside the Head that it's actually more difficult to Live Wild and not have the Safeguards in place of the Modernity you've been Used to and coddled with, coz it's a Hard Life.  And you really gotta Work at it, Hard and all the Time.  Constantly preparing for all the Weather, Seasons, and uncertainties of Hunting, Fishing and Growing what you will Eat, or Starve, having enuf Water, and avoid everything out there than can and will Kill you.  And if Work ain't your Jam at all, and you haven't got the Skills or Knowledge, you definitely ain't gonna Make it with Extreme Living!!!  A certainty.

Self-sufficiency is possible, but it takes a LOT of Work and that Show just annoys me coz I can tell most of them folks aren't up to it at all.  They'll need more than One Rescue an Episode parlays into Entertainment.  And probably Funded too coz they damned sure couldn't.   *LOL*  And it's "Reality TV" too, which isn't tethered to any Reality actually and we all should know this as well.   Donnie Two Dolls was a Reality TV Myth fabricated by Hollywood and not legit, too many folks bought into that fake Persona as well, thinking it to be Real.   He even bought into it, and has been so insulated and protected all his Life, so remains delusional to this day that the Myth Created for him, is actually Real.  And that he did it all on his own and is/was ever a Success Story.  How you define Success is highly subjective tho'.

I can only say I Witness that he's been a Successful Criminal and unscrupulous his whole Adult Life.   And very Privileged from Birth, so most $$$ wasn't his and was handed to him to squander and make it look like he had Success rather than Failure after Failure, epic Failures, blowing thru Billions and Bankrupting numerous times.  Screwing Over a lot of Investors, Banks, Contractors, Employees, Charities, Voters, now all of America... he's good at Screwing Over and Conning folks, he's had probably over 50 Years Plus of Practice at it, so he's Perfected THAT.  And, it has Served him Well, which is why there's been no Change in his M.O., same as it's always been, with Zero real Consequences.  The Right folks have been Paid Off and Bought along the way.  And lots of Victims too have been "Purchased", including Underaged ones, let us just say and it IS of Record BTW, not Speculation.

Anyway, this Post is coming to an End and I still don't have a Clever Title Hook for it yet... and it should Publish Tomorrow, so, I gotta come up with something.  *Bwahahahahaha*    Post Titles matter to Dear Readers, I can tell by the Stats.  *Winks*  What Hooks and Draws you In is usually the Post Title Hook more than just being a Faithful Reader of any Blog.  Even the most Faithful don't show up as often as I Blog, it would be a Full Time Job, wouldn't it?  *Bwahahahaha*  And I Purge them Post Archives harshly now, so if you don't Read it in a limited amount of Time, Poof, it's been put in the Bin already and is Old News to me and discarded.  I have no Need to Keep a Single Post after I Write it, no Attachments to it.  This is my Relaxation and when it's Done, I'm already Over it for the Purpose intended for myself.   The ADHD Adult is very much like this and Time hasn't Changed that about me.  What I did Yesterday no longer matters to me, I don't Think Hard upon Tomorrow either, I'm Living in The Moment.

Each Day has enuf to get thru without looking back or looking forward too far either.  And usually this Day is what I can Handle adequately.  Can't Change what happened in the Past, don't know for sure what will happen in the Future or how I'll Deal with it either?   When it comes, then I'll figure it out.   And so I'll just make that the long Post Title Hook I guess, why not?  *Winks*  I'm sure most of you are getting used to Living One Day at a Time now as well I suspect?   And if we can do just that, we might just Make it...

*******

So, here's to Making it my Friends... Dawn... The Bohemian

Burnout Is A Bitch

 

Well, our Social Security Checks did hit finally and so I could send out the rest of my Bills and not incur either Late Charges or NSF Fees, yay!  It's a feeling of relief when all the Money Owed to you is finally Paid Out.  I can now relax thru EOM tho' there's no 'Extra' anymore with everything increasing in prices and income not keeping pace.  But, it's covering everything necessary, so, Life is still Good.  *Whew*  I didn't go to The Gym Yesterday as Planned and likely won't Today either, too Cold out there so I'm aching, the Cold gets into the Marrow of my Bones and makes movement painful until I Warm up.

Sure, I could say Pain is Weakness leaving the Body and force myself to do a Workout in spite of how much I'm hurting Physically.  But, I like my Workouts to be pleasurable, not torturous.  *LOL*  I have a very high threshold for enduring Pain and ignore it most of the time, but I certainly don't magnify it by doing things that would intensify it either.  So, I'm Blogging after taking Princess T to Work and Mailing my Bills, rather than heading straight for The Gym at 7:00 a.m..  The Man is up wandering around anyway like a Lost Soul and nobody else is up yet to Watch him, so, it's best I stay Home with him anyway.  He's been high maintenance lately and not Feeling good.

His last Nurse's visit all his Numbers were excellent tho', his Blood Pressure was Normal and not High for a change.  His Diabetic Numbers were Normal Range and not High either.  His A1C has been reduced too.  But, I think his Brain Function often is what's making him not Feel good and is struggling to maintain optimum Function?   Dementia is like that and troubles the Body as much as it troubles the Mind.  He's slowly forgetting how to do what should be instinctual like Eating and Drinking, or Sleeping, so must be reminded constantly now that it's necessary.  He will battle you on it like a Small Child would, and gets agitated about it if challenged.  But he MUST Eat, Drink and Sleep, it's mandatory, not optional.

Taking his Meds, especially the Injections, he's a little less resistant to, but, ONLY if you are a Witness now to him actually doing it and not just pretending to do it or avoiding doing it!   I've instructed both Generations of Kiddos on what his Tricks are to fake doing both the Oral Meds and/or his Injections, to Watch him like a Hawk doing both and checking that the Pills are Swallowed and the Needle goes IN his Body and administers the Medication!?!   Yeah, we've all become like a Team of Nurse Ratchets in our very own version of "One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest" here at The Asylum aka: Forever Boheme'.  *LOL*

It was Interesting to have the conversation with the Haitian Nurse sent for The Daughter's Evaluation and Checkup to discuss how best to Medicate her to stave off Schizophrenic Episodes?!   Okay, so, Psyche Meds, she was always resistant to taking, eventually couldn't take coz it was crapping out her Vital Organs when she was on them too long anyway.  And so, she replaced Prescribed Drugs with Self Medicating with Dangerous Street Drugs.  'Til she got Clean and now she switched to Self Medicating with Alcohol and sometimes a little bit of Medicinal MJ.  It's far better her Alcoholism to manage, than Full On Schizophrenia, so, I don't know what to tell you.  *LOL*

Yes, but her Liver... the chance of Cirrhosis, says The Nurse.  Well Yeah, there's that, but, out of Control Schizophrenia poses far more Risk to everyone involved and then she can't Live here coz I cannot Manage that and have the Obligation to keep us all Safe.  So, One Mike's Hard a day is something I can Live with her doing to take the Edge off and not be Cuckoo all of the time, Okay?  And, she is Safe here and Feels Safe here, and, she's been Clean for over Three Years now so the Alcohol is something she presently Needs.  If we send her to a Rehab she wouldn't stay and probably would resist Going. 

 Plus, ALL Rehabs tend to pose Risks of Exposure to those still IN The Life and sneaking Drugs in.  We don't Need to Risk that chance of Relapse and those kinds of Contacts and Negative exposure.   She realized that this isn't this Family's First Rodeo and we know the Score and Risks involved with Traditional Methods.  Both of my Addict Children got Clean on their own.  Rehab never Worked... ever... was a constant revolving Door and they just ended up meeting more Addicts while in there and many weren't Serious yet about getting Clean and Sober either.  They were Serious enuf to tough it out and do it on their own without an Intervention.

My Method was, you can't be here if you're in The Life, period.  I'll Pray fervently that The Lord gets your Attention some kind of way to where you won't wanna be in The Life anymore and He aids you to kick your Addiction and get it up under Control.   But, it's always subject to Relapse, so you must banish all Exposure to The Life, ALL the People, ALL the Places, ALL the Habits, ALL the Delusions and Illusions, and Drop it ALL like a Rock in order to start over and Be Clean.  You're only ever ONE USE away from backsliding right back into what you climbed out of.  Coz if you get the Person out of the Mess, but you don't get the Mess out of the Person, they fall right back into it.

They Want to be here and the only way they can is on the Terms I mandate, their Choice.  Otherwise, make other Arrangements, coz I ain't having any of it destroying my Life, my Peace and my Calm.  I'm too fucking Old and have Obligations beyond just each one of them.  I've had to kick them out before if they relapse, so I'm vigilant about everyone remaining Clean of Drugs and managing the Alcoholic intake too.  Coz folks who are Drunk or High are a Trigger for Yours Truly and my reaction to it is to go full on Dark Dawn on their Asses and completely Mental.  If they can't handle ME that way, then just don't fucking do it.  If they slip even a little bit with the Alcohol intake, they're instantly reminded Dark Dawn isn't pleasant to Square Off with and challenge.

Yes, I'd Like for both of them to beat Alcoholism too and never Drink again.  I Wish they'd never taken a Drink.  But, neither of them can Handle their Mental Illnesses completely Clean and Sober either, there's no Cure, and it can get way worse Dealing with that shit than Dealing with some Alcohol intake within Reason.  So, you almost have to choose which Devils you can Manage and coexist with, and the lesser of Two Evils you wanna endure and has less damage control and Risk to run behind?   Coz the fucking Cavalry ain't coming, this is the Hand Dealt and Society isn't Caring enuf to make things better and find Solutions to such complex Problems that are Long-Term and Expensive.  

It's an imposition to Society to have the Broken Toys around.  It is upsetting and an annoyance to the Healthy and Well, often with much resentment, to those who had a Luckier Hand Dealt them.  Why should it be their Problem after all?   They highly resent Funding Programs for the most Vulnerable and vilify them.  Yet seem Okay with Billionaires and Politicians wasting and Grifting their Tax Dollars for far more $$$ than any Social Programs ever Cost, go figure.  In just a single Year for 2.0 the Grifter-In-Chief has pocketed over a Billion for himself alone for The Long Con.  That's not counting all the other Grifts and Waste, Extortion, Nepo Hires, Offshore Accounts in Qatar, etcetera... and backdoor Deals with Bad Actors to enrich all the Cronies involved in the Ultimate Scam.

  Matters not if it's Illegal, Immoral, Corrupted, and a Conflict Of Interest now... the Rules have been Changed... Forever.  The American Taxpayers, for Generations now, will Pay the Price for what was installed and left to run amok without Guardrails, Checks or Balances, or any significant Consequences.   And other World Leaders better Wise Up quick and realize that Appeasing someone like this, Kowtowing, Patronizing, Flattering, Gifting, and Sucking Up, only makes it worse and emboldens the Behavior.   It's being Encouraged whenever you Reward it like that.  Behavior Tolerated IS Behavior ACCEPTED.  He Feeds off them being intimidated or fawning over him, but Guys like him are actually Weak and Cowardly, so fall in Line to someone actually Strong and Brave, coz that's what they Secretly wanna be.

So, anyway, the Antique Mall called while I was Napping this Morning to ask if I'd Work a 5-9 Tonight.  I Agreed coz, well, Rents went up and that will offset some of the increase to get some Comped Space Rent and Sales still ain't what they should be either.  In spite of the Four Day Sale, nothing significant Sold at only 15% Off, just Smalls and less expensive items to begin with.  I'm bringing some bigger Ticket items in with me Tonight, I have a Milk Crate filled again with The Good Stuff.  But, whether that will entice folks to let go of Money they don't NEED to spend is iffy, no matter how Good the Merch is or Priced to Sell.  I leave some Margin in for Vendors to be my Buyers of the Primo Merch, they Covet it if that's what they Specialize in Selling.

Anyway, in Real Time it's a Wednesday Night so its not likely to be especially busy, but, you never know.  I could Price more but I'll be challenged to find the Space for what I'm already bringing in and it's very Cold Outside still, never got above 43 yet Today, Brrrr.  It was 69 for almost all of Yesterday, which was Pleasant, this isn't Pleasant and why I was Nappy at 9:00 a.m. coz I was hurting deep in my Bones and Sleep helps with that, easing it as the day Hopefully gets Warmer... but, it didn't yet.   So, I'm moving towards sorting thru Jammies now.  The Daughter saw the Three big Donation Boxes of Pants and wants to try to Sell some at a Yard Sale first, so, I'll let her this Weekend.

If she can earn some Money for herself doing that I don't mind, I just want it out of the Main House for now.  She may do well with it coz the Spanish Speaking Ladies that tend to frequent her Yard Sales and converse with her in Spanish are bigger Women and always asking for larger Sizes of everything.   The Daughter and Princess T aren't Large, and the Women bought a lot of The Man's Shirts for their Menfolk in larger Sizes.  *Smiles*  So, there had been requests for larger Sized Women's Wear... and now, she'll have some.  *LOL*   She puts her Yard Sale stuff under the 5th Wheel in it's Storage Compartments, which are quite large and can hold Bins of things.  It gives her incentive to do some little Sales on the Weekends and earn some Cash to spend.

She says a lot of the Buyers are probably Buying in bulk to take down to Mexico to Sell too at the Ropa Usada Warehouses near the Border.  They Sell Bales of huge piles of Clothing for a very low price.   At the "Goodwill" Warehouse where they Sell everything by the Pound, you see a lot of the Mexicans Buying in bulk, for to take to Mexico to Sell at or to the Warehouses too.  The Resale Market for Used Clothing is growing all the time as full Retail is costing too much now and Production and Supply Chains are being hampered by Bad Policy coming out of the White House's current Regime.

  It is likely to worsen since he's on another Tariff Bender of Revenge and Retribution against our Allies who won't Sell or let him just Take Greenland... or make Canada the 51st State against their Wishes too.  *Eye Roll*  AS IF any of those Countries wants to be any part of being Run by the Hot Mess of American Leadership right now.  I don't even wanna be any part of THAT America and I'm an American!!!  And used to be Proud of being one until this Psycho has made us a Worldwide Pariah now, not to be Trusted or Befriended anymore.   I do realize most of the other Countries understand that not all, or even most, Americans, are on Board this Crazy Train.  But they do see it derailing and know there will be carnage beyond our Borders due to it.  And that a swath of Americans did Board it and are therefore just like him if still Supporting it.

I just went thru the majority of my Jammies and Purged some, I've got enuf I'm Keeping that I never Need to Buy more.  *LOL*  Now The Daughter has a total of Four Boxes of Pants & of Jammies now to Sell.  She says whatever doesn't Sell we can then Donate and I'm Good with that Strategy.   She's got Boxes of her Dad's Baseball Caps Collection too that we Downsized and Purged so he has a reasonable amount of those he'll actually wear some of the time.  He has an Obsession with Collecting Hats and he always wears a Hat and looks good in them, or in Sunglasses, so he's had a vast amount of each.  He's less inclined to want Wardrobe than his Fav Accessories tho', he'd be Fine with just a scant few Pants and a Handful of Shirts to wear all the time.  So, we Purged his Closet of excess he didn't even want that much of.

I haven't felt on top of my Game this day at all, so I Hope I can pull myself together before I go in to Work the Shift I picked up to fill in for a No-Show Regular?   I've felt Tired and really Down in a lethargic way, the early Nap didn't restore any Energy levels either, nor did Working on Purging items from my Wardrobe.  It got a lot done, but I was just slogging thru it, rather blase' and quite coolly indifferent and unconcerned to what I was busy doing.   A Customer would pick up on that, so I don't wanna go in with a blase' Attitude there at Work, it wouldn't be appropriate.   When something is no longer exciting or I'm bored or World weary and Jaded, I can get this way.  And, that's where I'm definitely AT right now and haven't shaken it off Today.  Burnout is a Bitch.

The Daughter is Cooking Lunch, I know I have to eat hearty for Lunch coz I won't get Dinner before going in to Work.   And usually I don't Eat after 9:00 p.m. when I'll be getting off Work and getting Home so Late.  I've got my Dental Appointment for the Cleaning in the Morning too.  I've had no problems so expect to just get the Twice Annual Cleaning and Checkup.  As a Diabetic you have to get checked more than just the One time Annually, that I normally would if I didn't have it.  I've been stable tho' and my Numbers are way down, including the A1C being in the 6's Range, which was a Goal I hit and Hope will Hold?   

Oddly, the more Stable the Diabetes gets, the crappier I actually Feel, coz your Body has to readjust to having better results.   Your Body adapts to the consistently high Glucose Levels if they've been High too long, which mine were, and my Body is interpreting it as a Low {Hypoglycemia} when I'm finally in Healthy Range.  Physiological Adaptation is something you don't really Control, it just fucking happens.  And it can cause Fatigue and Stress, which is probably part of what I'm experiencing right now.  It's unpleasant, even tho' you're actually Healthier, but your Body is struggling to adjust.   Diabetic Fatigue is The Devil!!!

I'm feeling a little better after eating a nice Burrito The Daughter made for us and some Rice Cakes for a Snack later on.  I got some mini Quaker Rice Cakes Individual Snack Bags that are flavors, like BBQ, Sour Cream & Onion, Sweet & Spicy Chili, Caramel, Buttermilk Ranch, Apple Cinnamon, Jalapeno Cheddar, and Cheddar.   They have the Six Flavor Variety Pack which has 12 Bags of them and I Bought at the Discount Grocer, I really like them all.  But they have Pacs with Four Flavors too.  I find they satiate any Cravings for a good Snack in between Meals.  Some other Brands make different Flavors of them I haven't tried yet, but will now.  I'm not a big Snacker, but when I find a Snack I like, then I'm delighted, coz most Snacks just don't seem good for you at all and I wouldn't eat.  My Family like Snacks tho', especially The Man, and since he doesn't Eat well anymore, at least he's eating something if he has voluntarily accepted a Snack rather than the avoidance and rejection of a Meal.

I like to give a Shout Out for Products I happen to be impressed with and enjoy.  Especially as I'm on a Weight Loss and Health Improvement Journey, it's Helpful to anyone else that might be too.  I've always preferred eating Healthy and never have been a Junk Food Junkie nor a Fast/Fried Food Addict either, don't like most of those kinds of Unhealthy Foods, so don't Crave them, or Sweets.  I'm a bit of a Food Snob actually, since my Dad was a Master Chef.  So I grew up eating very well and he was a stickler for Healthful Foods, and my Mom was a Vegetarian mostly, so always ate Healthful Foods and drank Tea daily.  So, our whole Family were Naturally Thin until my Mom had her bout with Cancer, had to have a complete Hysterectomy, and that Surgery caused excessive Weight Gain, coz she couldn't have Hormone Replacement Therapy. 

 I ended up with the same problem after a Hysterectomy, not due to poor Diet or Bad Habits.  I've always Exercised and been exceedingly Active.  I like Fresh Foods and Healthier Foods, but my Hormonal Balance was disrupted with that Surgery.  And the Surgeon warned me that it would, by about 60 lbs. or so, and he was Spot On.   And after Weight Gain from it, I also developed Diabetes, as did my Mom after her Hysterectomy and Weight Gain from the Surgery too.   She ended up with Diabetes until she Died becoz due to Mobility Issues and Advanced Age, she couldn't Exercise and never was an Exercise Person like I am.  I don't recall ever seeing Mom doing a Workout.  *LOL*  I've done everything from Organized Sports and Yoga as a Child and Young Adult, to all the Exercise Regimens I still do now.  I Like to Exercise and be Active, and do some Daily. 

I'm glad I sorted thru and Purged my Jammies coz I found all the Winter Bottoms to wear that are Warmer.  I just use Solid T-Shirts as Jammie Tops, I don't actually own Pajamas, just Jammie Bottoms.  *LOL*  I found a few things to Sell too that were Tie Dye Tops which somehow got put in with Jammies, probably when The Man did Laundry.  Work on Wednesday Night was so busy, I was shocked, usually Wednesday wouldn't be a busy Night of Sales, but, it was.  Everyone was pissed that our Rent went up by 6% this January, last January it had gone up by 5%, that's a huge hike in just 2 Years of shitty Sales and a sagging Economy.  It's not as if during Pandemic, and we were Closed for Two Years being a Non-Essential Business, that Times weren't tough and haven't totally rebounded.  Before this Shitshow Presidency tanked it in 1.0 and worsened it further in 2.0 to where it's on the precipice now of potential Financial Collapse! 

If pissing off all our Allies makes them pull the Notes on all their American Investments, Loans, Bonds and other $$$ they have here, they could collapse our Economy without even firing a fucking Shot.  And they're starting to cut America out of the International Trade Market and just do Business with other Superpower Countries that are more Economically Intelligent than the Bankruptcy King Moron we have making America's Financial decisions.  That Guy Bankrupted Casinos... just think about that for a Minute and tell me one other Person whose ever done that?!  I'll wait...  The Purpose of a Casino is YOU go in with all your Money to Gamble, and come out with NONE of it.  Guess the epic Ignorance of Donnie didn't quite Understand that either?!  *LOL*  His Ignorance actually seems to know no bounds... and that last Speech to the International Community!!!  OMG I couldn't be more Embarrassed and Ashamed for America!!!

With such Ignorance and Dementia laden Senility Meanderings that droned on and on, lashing out Angrily, saying such Clueless shit like if it wasn't for America they'd all be Speaking German.  When the Host Country, well, that IS their Main Language, but he so Ignorant he doesn't even know that!!!  Of coarse he didn't know the Country of Belgium wasn't a City either.   And he called Greenland, Iceland, at least half a Dozen times or so.  If Joe Biden had acted that Addled in any Speech the ReTrumplicans would have mocked it forever, yet, they're Silent as Fuck when their Guy is way, way, way, way, way-way Worse Off than Uncle Joe ever was!!!  *Eye Roll*  Of coarse I'm of the Opinion our Politicians and Supreme Court ought to have Age Limits on who can remain... this Geriatric Lineup isn't Working, isn't making Sound Decisions at such advanced Ages, posing Danger to themselves and others, and should be put out to Pasture ASAP.

While I was at Work a New Vendor who now has a Booth Upstairs, had Vintage Trolls, Two very Large Uneeda Wishnik ones with the Double Horseshoe on their Feet and a slew of Smaller ones by Russ in Costumes, at ridiculously low Prices.  Sometimes Newbie underprice their Merch and they will Sell Out quickly, mostly to other Vendors who know they're way too Light on the Price.  Anyway, I Bought the Two Large ones coz they were about 70% underpriced and I Collect them, they were all the large ones this Vendor had, but I'll keep a Lookout if they bring in more.  And I Bought Two of the Smaller ones by Russ, that were about 60% underpriced, one a Little Old Lady Troll and the other an Australian Bushman holding a Koala Bear.  I looked the Australian one up and Yowsah, it was actually worth 90% more at Auction!  All were in Mint Condition, looked to be either New Old Stock or from a Collection someone didn't handle much.

I do well Selling Trolls, so I was Tempted, at the low prices, and thought about picked up some from this Vendor to Resell at a more appropriate Price.  But, I'm not Buying things for Inventory, I already have too much from Home I'm Downsizing and have to stick with the Mission Statement I have of mostly Selling from my Personal Edit & Purge.  *LOL*   The Old Lady one has Grey & Black Hair with an Outfit that is probably Stock but looks almost handmade and has a little Hat on. {See Below my actual Four}  So, Color me Happy, these will remain in my Personal Collection and they do have Value for the Heirs to one day profit from Reselling.  I had a $5 Store Credit to use against the Purchase too, so one of the Trolls was even Free to me, since the Smaller ones were only $4.50.  *Smiles*  And they actually are Mid-Sized and not the Smaller Sized Trolls.  I used to Resell some of my Big ones but don't anymore, even tho' they can fetch a handsome price, they're hard to replace.

This bottom Troll is dressed like our Son dressed as a Child, it's hilarious, we all noticed it!  *Smiles*  Our Vendors who do have the Dam Trolls, are asking in the Stratosphere for theirs and you'd have to be a Serious Collector with Deep Pockets and Money being no Object, to pay that much IMO.  But, I've seen Serious Collectors pay up beyond my League of Collecting and some Vendors are Courting THAT Customer.  I don't see a great many of them anymore tho', only the Pokemon People now are throwing down ridiculous amounts for their Collection without blinking an Eye.  I've had Customers in the Mall paying $800 for a Box of Pokemon Cards from the Pokemon Vendors!  The Pokemon exclusive Sellers are currently Killin' it in Sales and why The Mall Claims Sales are up by 30%, which, they're not really for the majority of us NOT Selling Merch like Pokemon and Anime.  Even the Sports Memorabilia, Militaria Memorabilia, and Disney Pin People aren't coming in and Buying anymore like they used to.

And Purist Antique Dealers are going out of Business, coz that Market is Dead.  Even Architectural Salvage has slowed.  But, Vintage Toys, especially the Cult Classics, and Vintage or Specialty Clothing, is Hot right now.  And Mid-Century Mod is still quite Hot and desired.  I'm suddenly Selling Globes again, so will have to bring more in from my Private Collection, coz I just Sold the last Vintage one again.  Fiesta Ware is still doing quite well, but then, it always has.  Mostly coz the Mid-Century Mod Folks usually use that as their Place Settings, either in One specific Color they prefer, or a Multi-Color Festive Look for their Table and Kitchen Display Cabinets and Shelves.  And the Old Diner Ware is always Popular too, as is Jadeite from Fire King, but the "Good" and "Fine" China, and Crystal, forget about it, you can't give that shit away.

 

If I do ever want Desserts, this Trio would be right up there tho', from the Mediterranean Restaurant.  It's the only place I usually do Order a Dessert after my Meal.   And I'm suddenly Jonesin' for Mediterranean Food but most of that Genre of Restaurant is in the East Valley.  The few that were in the West Valley sadly Closed up, and only a scant few new ones have opened, which was a shame, coz they were very good, but the Demographic Westside wasn't big on eating it.  The East Valley and Downtown Phoenix has a wider variety of Cuisines and better Quality Restaurants than the Far West Valley does.  The West Valley is growing exponentially tho' and the Price Point of Homes and Luxury Apartments might change the Demographic to where we get more diversity pretty soon.  

I am a big Fan of diversity and melding of various Cultures, it enriches any Community IMO and Exposure is EVERYTHING.  In an Insulated non-diverse Society people become very narrow-minded and ignorant about other Cultures different than their own.   A Homogenous Society tends to develop deep Biases, Prejudices, exclusiveness, and inaccurate often broad assumptions about who them deem as "Others", who are Human Beings that are just different from themselves.  I'm so glad I had diverse Exposure and World Travels.   So that it never was an Issue within our Interracial Intercultural Family, who are as diverse as you could possibly be, in Cultures, Races, Lifestyle and Religions.  So we were accepting of everyone and anyone, enjoying getting to know more about who and what was different in our Global Travels.  It was Enriching and a True Education and Experience, not based on Ignorance and no Points of Reference to draw upon.

This was my Springtime Bulb Potted Plant selection to put in our Livingroom, it smelled Divine.  The Blooms are about spent now and will go dormant soon... but their Aroma is still lingering.   The Niece has only been living with her Dad in Texas a short while and said she's already experiencing Caregiver PTSD, oh my, already?!   She's the one that lost her high paying IT Tech Job designing and maintaining Websites for a long time Employer during the Summer and can't find Work.  So was going to initially Career Change to AI, but thought it to actually be far too ominous a Field she didn't want any part of being.   So, she had to move from Oklahoma to Texas to live with her ailing Dad, whose Relationship has always been quite strained and for good reason.  And I just knew it likely wouldn't work out, he's been Estranged from all his Kiddos off and on for as long as I can remember.  She thought he'd Changed... he's too Old now to expect that IMO.

Her Mom was one of my BFF's and when she Died, I had nothing to do with her Husband, never much Liked him and didn't Trust him either, his Vibe was always all Wrong to me.   But their Three Daughters are like Family to us and we call them our Nieces and they call us their Aunt and Uncle, call our Kids their Cousins.   They all grew up together and have been Close almost all their Lives, so most folks don't know they're no biological connection to us.  *LOL*  Her Two Younger Sisters we haven't had much contact with tho', but the Oldest one is very close to us, probably more than to her Blood Relatives.  She fits in more with our Family than with her own.  And I can see Why.   I liked her Mom's side of the Family, but her Dad's Side are West Texans, Fundie Religious, MAGA to the Max Types... yeah, I can see Why she doesn't fit in with her Dad's People or her Dad.  Tho' he is one to realize MAGA was a Huge Mistake, so, that was a Surprise!  Better Late than Never I guess.  *LOL*

So, The Niece has been calling us a lot coz I know she feels quite Isolated in the part of the Country she's in, which is more Affordable, but like Living on another fucking Planet.  I've been there, both in Oklahoma and Texas... no reason to ever go back even for a short visit to see some of our Family who live in both States.   Reservation Life in Oklahoma is quite 'different', even from Rez's here in Arizona, so, I haven't been back since I was 17 even tho' all of my Dad's extended Family still live on the Rez.  We have Friends and Family in Texas, I was never impressed with Texas at all... and to me, Oklahoma was like the Armpit of America. Sorry Oklahomans, just my personal Opinion, it mos' def wasn't for me and the Poverty levels and numbers of Poorly Educated, were atrocious and quite Nationally Shameful IMO.  

It's near the bottom Nationally in Education Quality, placing 49th or 50th consistently... and it shows!  Underinvestment in Funding and Resources seems Statewide and even worse among the Indigenous Populations there that my Dad came from.   My Dad had about the equivalent of a 3rd Grade Education given him Academically.  He Taught himself most of what he knew coz he was a very Intelligent Man.  And my Mom was College Educated and had a Dad of Welsh Gypsy Heritage, who also was not afforded an Education and was totally Illiterate, but Smart and Spoke Numerous Languages.   So she knew how it was, and helped Dad improve his Academic furthering he'd never been afforded the Right to as a Native American.  

 

He always used Wicked Dark Humor about his Hand Dealt and said they took the Indian Children from their Families, put them to Work like Slave Labor for White People, tried to "Kill The Indian To Save The Man" and "Civilize" them with Colonialism Tactics so they wouldn't be "Uncivilized Heathens", and Called it an "Education".  Yeah, that pretty much did sum it up for all Tribes Experiences that the Genocide didn't exterminate that is.   And The Son's Navajo Girlfriend said it's not much different now and she had to take her Children out of the Indian Schools, move Off Rez, and give them the chance at a Real Academic Education in Public Schools instead.  But she said they endure lots of Bullying, Teasing about her Son's long Traditional Hair, which is down to his Hips, and a lot of overt Racism and Discrimination still towards the Indigenous.  

I understand, I was just Lucky I looked more European than Indigenous to receive the Opportunities and Options I have had and I'm Aware of that Fact.  We are fiercely Proud of our Heritages on both sides, but know what Societal Baggage it comes with... from both Cultures.  You know how I became a Good Fighter tho'?  Becoz when other Families would finally see my Dad or Hear my Mom Speak, then there would be what I referred to as "The Switch" and they'd get to meet and know Dark Dawn then.  From the Age of Two my Parents said I could Take Down someone twice my Size, especially Older Boys.  *Winks*  Anyone who Bullied me about my Dad being Indian or my Mom being an Immigrant, I'd get verbally vicious and unmerciful about it, often kick their Ass, hand it to them, and take Names.  *Winks*  They never did it Twice.  Ever.  Lesson well Learned.  If they will never Respect you, make them Learn to Fear you.  It Works.  And I still Bow Down to no Man.  *LOL*

I think Jesus would be Okay with that actually.  After all, His Dad Dealt me the Hand I've been Dealt to Play the Game of Life with.  And whatever I'm Playing, I Play to fucking Win, Fair is Rare and Life isn't Fair or Bras wouldn't come in Sizes.   And if I'm gonna Lose any Fight, I'm gonna make a Lasting Impression on my Opponent that they won't soon Forget so that there will never be a rematch, their Choice.  Winning doesn't mean you won't sustain damage from the Loser.  Mebbe a lot of it, too much of it to make the Winning of that Fight worthwhile.  *Winks*  I go into any Fight I'm Forced into {becoz I've never started a Fight in my Life but I End one with a Flourish}, like a Wrecking Ball to cause as much Damage to the Opponent as I possibly can.  If I won't Win then I don't Care if so much Collateral Damage is left in my Wake that there's not much left Standing in the debris field for the Winner.

I haven't heard back BTW from my 4th Appeal of the Social Security Medicare Penalties they're inaccurately assessing me.  They've given Four different Reasons now for Why they're Assessing it.  No consistency to the Why, they keep Changing WHY.   So it's clearly Bullshit to Extort extra Money they're NOT Owed and are taking out of my Checks anyway with this Regime's Takeover of all Agencies.  With incompetent and corrupt Nepo Hires and Yes Men.  Who are also among the most Criminally Inclined Cabal, so the Rule of Law means nothing to any of them and Legalities are just an inconvenience to NOT follow.  But I'll bury the Fuckers in incessant Appeals and be the biggest Pain in their Ass to have to respond to and endure.  Until and unless they are no longer Penalizing me for Nothing... even tho' it's $14.95 Monthly. *LOL*

 I'll go to the Dirt for a Righteous Cause, I'm just that Militant, Relentless, Mental and Tenacious.  I'll get a Pound of Flesh then, if I can't have my Fifteen Bucks a Month refunded me, in it's entirety with Backpay Compensation.   Tormenting the Fuck out of an Adversary is worth Fifteen Bucks a Month to me you see.  It's like a Sport to me actually and I can make it a FUN Challenge, and Amuse myself with it actually to exhaust my Opponent and it will Never Stop.  How ya Like me now?  *Winks*  I could do this all Day and Forever if I have to, their Choice really, they'll become my Obsession, which is never Good when I make anyone or anything my Mission In Life to become Obsessed with and get my Hooks into, you can't Shake me Loose 'til I CHOOSE to Let Go.  *Bwahahahahaha*  

Now, if they refund me the $200+ a Month TriCare won't Cover of my Rx Co-Pays thru Express Scripts, with this Part D they Claim I'm now Paying for too, in whatever they're now calling what they're taking out of my Checks, but don't actually Qualify to Receive, I'll be Okay with that Arrangement.  *Smiles*  I'll gladly Pay the $14.95 for them to cover the $200+ in Co-Pays then, we have a Deal that is beneficial to me to Let Go and not be like a Dog with a Bone about it.  But, it's got to Benefit me whatever the Fuck they've done, coz I sure don't understand it coz they don't even seem to.  I've called them Directly, they don't know for sure and keep Changing the Why.  They KNOW I have TriCare so therefore shouldn't have and can't have Part D.   My Humana Caseworker has no Idea what they're doing, coz he says they shouldn't be doing it either.  It's a Bureaucratic Red Tape Mystery... of which I'm sure there are many.  As many as the Stars in the Sky, pretty Sure.  *Eye Roll*  BTW: I almost bought these Cacti Cookies for the Family until I realized they were Gourmet Dog Biscuits!  *LOL*

*******

Fighting the Good Fight here in the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian