Another Medical Emergency ~ And Being Completely Unforgettable

Warning... Long Stressful Post ahead...

 I'm starting this Post while contemplating whether to delay the Publication of the last one I Wrote or not?  Reason, the Post of a Dearly Departed Friend that Published has hardly been Read.  So I may let it be the most recent Published one for yet another Day or more Hours at least, to pay proper Homage to that Dear Friend.  Perhaps Dear Readers don't want a Dead Friend Post to have to Read, I dunno?  I just know that usually a Post is received well and that one has not been at all, and the Topic may have been Why?  Not sure?   It won't hurt to delay the Unpublished finished Post another Day, so I just might... well, I just did... so now it won't Publish 'til Monday Morning.

Her Two Sons have made no mention of their Mom Passing, just Two of her Three Daughters have.  The One Son is in The Life, so, it's understandable that the rest of the Family may have no idea where he is or if he's even still among the Living and could be told.  He is a dangerous Drug user and has been for a long time, it's tragic, but isolated him from everyone, which was best for everyone else actually.  His behavior became way too unhinged for the Family or Friends to Deal with him, and he was always stealing or asking for Money for his Habit, so none of us had anything to do with him anymore.  I know my Friend Hoped he'd get Clean, but, he never has.

The other Son was a raging Alcoholic for Years, but got Sober and has maintained Sobriety for Years now.  He never dabbled with Drugs, which was good.  He now has a good Career and a Beautiful Girlfriend, we're so Happy for him turning his Life completely around, he looks Healthy, Handsome and Happy .  But, no mention of his Mom during her long Illness or after she Passed, and he was close to her.   I know he's aware, we've all sent our Condolences to him and the Siblings everyone still has regular Contact with.  

And his Youngest Sister, who was her Caregiver, told all the Family to come see her one last time, since my Friend was asking for them.  I don't know how many were able to tho'?   He has loads of Pixs of his Dog, none of his Family on FB, so, perhaps he's Estranged now from Family, I just dunno?  He is still 'Friends' with me and my Kiddos on The Book Of Faces, so has had Contact with us tho'.  Her Kiddos are like Nieces and Nephews to me, and like Cousins to my Kids, we've known them practically all their Lives.

A lengthy illness is tough to make that Call on when is near the End or not?  We went thru that more with my Mom than my Dad.  So, I couldn't be there when it was closer to Mom's Time, I'd come Months beforehand and figured it might be our last time together.  She at least still knew who I was, even tho' she'd forgotten who most everyone else was by then.  So, her desire to see Family just wasn't there with the advanced Dementia, coz she didn't really remember who almost anyone was anymore anyway.  So, it was more for them to see her, than it was for her to see them one last time.  She couldn't remember much English anymore either and had reverted to speaking her First Language, Welsh, and we're nowhere near fluent.  So, there was also a significant communication barrier and no Interpreters.

I've never met anyone in all my Years living in America who spoke my Mom's dialect of Welsh... or actually, anyone who spoke any dialect of Welsh at all, it's not a Written Language either.  So, there wouldn't have been any Interpreters available, anymore than there would have been for my Dad with any Tribal Languages, which also aren't Written Languages.  They are Dying Languages and few speak them fluently, if at all, anymore.  And they became Forbidden Languages as Colonization punished those who still spoke them and forced English upon them and tried to erase their Cultures completely.  As each Generation Dies Off, those Languages have less and less fluent Speakers of them and it's a damned shame and Cultural Loss that to me is significant. 

Anyway, I don't mean for this to be yet another Morose, Morbid or Death Post, Sorry.  As more and more of our Generation Dies Off it does give one a sense of our own Mortality tho'.  Eventually there will be none of us left either, erased... and Every 100 Years, All New People.   In a way, that's kind of a Clean Slate and Fresh Start for Humanity IMO.  What they do with it, or fail to do with it, is then on them.  Most of our Kid's Friends do not still have both Parents, some have already Lost both Parents.  Some never had both Parents to begin with and were Raised entirely by Single Parents or Custodial Relatives.  I know far too many who Lost a Parent way too Young, since their Parent Died quite Young and prematurely.  Old Age being a Privilege not afforded to many.  Above is Princess T with her Gay Boy Posse, Timmy and Matthew.  I got some Tea to spill she told me Today... further down in this Post.  *Winks*

One of my Cousins on the Rez was the 1st to Reach Out when she heard of my BFF Passing.  She's had much Loss in her Life, on the Rez the Life Expectancy isn't good, never has been good.  It's a Hard Life, and she not only Lost both Parents, but she's also Lost a Child and her Husband.  She still has Three Living Children, and she had Children and was Married exceptionally Young, by Age 13, which is not so unusual.  She's my Age... and even our Paternal Native American Grandmother was Married and began having Children by Age 13.  Which these days would be, and should be, Illegal and considered Pedophilia.  But for some Cultures it hasn't been, clear up to and including my Generation and in some Countries, still happens regularly, Child Brides to much Older Men.  

And even in my Mom's Culture, in her Day, if you were still Unmarried by the end of your Teens, the Family got Worried they'd never get you Married Off and you'd become an Old Maid!!!  *Eye Roll and Cringing*  My Mom was 19 when she met my Dad and considered quite "Old" to still be Unmarried.  *LOL*  And she was Engaged to my Dad for Two Years, becoz both she and he felt Teenagers shouldn't Marry, and he was Two Years Older than her and not a Teenager when he met her.  They always went on Chaperoned Dates, usually my Uncle, Mom's Older Brother, was the Chaperone to Guard her Virtue, which was the Custom.  So, she was 21 and he was 23 when they got Married and my Welsh Grandparents and my Native American Grandmother thought they were quite "Old" to wait that long.  *Bwahahahaha*

I was over 28 before I got Married the 1st time, so I can't even Imagine what any of my Grandparents would have thought about THAT long a Wait?!!!   Pretty sure my own Parents thought I'd NEVER get Married!?  *Ha ha ha*  I had The Daughter before I ever Married... and never wanted to Marry Baby's Daddy at all.  And I was Preggy when I got Married the 1st time, but not Showing  yet, with The Son's Dad, who, I never should have Married either actually.  *LOL*  I met The Man when I was 30 and he's 6 Years Older than me, we actually Eloped after a very brief time of Dating, meeting on a Super Bowl Sunday January 22nd, 1989, and Marrying by March 18th, and got Married in Las Vegas.  And... the rest is History.  *Winks*  The 49ers played the Bengals and we were at a Club/Bar outside of the Base watching the Game when I met him.  

My Brother and I were the Designated Drivers for our G.I. Friends who were getting Hammered and needed a Ride back on Base without a hassle from the Sky Cops.  Neither my Brother or I drink... we Honored our Dad's Advice that anyone Indigenous should stay away from the Fire Water... it's Wise Advice and has been a Scourge of his People.   The Man's 2nd Job, outside of being Career Military, was being the Club/Bar DJ and Bouncer at that Establishment.  I remember he thought my Brother initially was either my Boyfriend or Husband coz we didn't look anything alike so people never thought we were Related who didn't know us.  

He was 6'4" with Curly Blue Black Hair, Hazel Eyes and Light Complexion.   I'm 5'2" with then Straight Light Brown Hair, Grey Eyes and Swarthy Complexion.  I've had Friends who looked more like my Siblings than my Brother ever did.  *LOL*   Now we're Old we look more alike tho' I think.  But, we've always been very close and used to do everything together when he lived in Arizona and almost all of our Friends were the same Friends.  I remember clarified who we were to each other and he Warned The Man, No, I'm her Brother... but a Word of Advice, you are Living Dangerously if you Date my Sister, she's Crazy.  *Bwahahahaha*   The Man clearly was an Adrenalin Junkie and prone to Lived Dangerously.  *Winks*  My Dad also Warned him... she is like her Mother, so, be Forewarned, becoz everyone is Afraid of my Wife!!!   *Winks and LMAO, coz Dad wasn't Wrong!!!* 

Okay, now for the Spilled Tea that Princess T told me of her Gay Boy Posse.  Okay, so Matthew is still going to College at Northern Arizona University, he's Native American and it's near the Rez up there where he has Relatives.   Being a Two Spirit Person in Native Culture is totally accepted and always has been.  So, LGBTQ+ Indigenous have never had a problem within their Tribes of Acceptance, in fact, it's revered by most Tribes as an Elevated and Enlightened State of Being to have the Spirit of Both Male and Female.  Many become Shaman.  Anyway, so, Matthew comes down on Spring Break around this time of Year and usually the Trio get together and go Camping, so Planned to do that again when Matthew comes down.  But then... Timmy announces, that his Boyfriend NEEDS to come too!!!!!!!!!!!  Ruh Roh!!!!!!!

Coz, first of all... Princess T and Matthew were like... he NEEDS to come?  Whattsup with THAT??!!!!  Odd Choice of Words.  NO, he doesn't Need to come, in fact, Princess T and Matthew don't even LIKE Timmy's Boyfriend for a slew of reasons, Timmy could do better, much better.   Anyway, now Princess T doesn't even wanna go.  Coz, she doesn't want the Boyfriend in tow ruining the whole Trip, plus, she asked Timmy if they were gonna Rent a separate Tent and he said No, lets just get a Bigger Tent!!!   And she's like, Yeah, NO!!!! 

  I do not wanna Sleep in a Tent with you AND your Boyfriend she said!!!   I Trust you, I Trust Matthew... I do NOT Trust that Boyfriend, he's Creepy!  And, besides, Why does he think he NEEDS to tag along, it's not like you're having a Relationship with me or Matthew!!!  Doesn't he Trust you?  Coz, you sure as Hell know you can't Trust HIM, he's already Cheated on you.  She thinks Timmy's Boyfriend is a Freak in ways she does not Like nor Approve of.  I told her, well, mebbe Timmy is Okay with that, you just never know?  *LOL*

That's when Matthew spilled some Side Tea to Princess T about the fact that he thinks the Boyfriend is into Threesomes and Matthew doesn't want any part of that... or even to be with either of the Guys... Timmy is just a Friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!   And now Princess T thinks if she Opts Out, that she wouldn't wanna leave Matthew Alone with them... but... if things are Freaky... she definitely don't wanna be there either for the Boyfriend's Freak Flag Flying High like that!!!   I told her mebbe it's best if Matthew Opts Out as well then?   

Pretty sure she's gonna say she's not going if that Boyfriend is.  If I were Matthew I wouldn't take the Risk of going either and be put in an awkward Space.   So, that's the Spilled Tea... and I think the whole Camping Trip will be Cancelled now.  She said she and Matthew could always Plan to do something else Together while he's down here on Spring Break.  And Timmy can then just Opt to do something with The Boyfriend, like, fucking just go Camping Together.  *Ha ha ha*

MUCH LATER:  The Man has been having terrible Panic and Anxiety Attacks the past couple of days and I don't know what to do about it?  He thinks what's in his Head is out to get him, and I think it's PTSD and the Dementia combined, which, isn't Good.  He said he didn't wanna Be Here.  I took him out for a Ride, which Calmed him down a lot.  There was a big Brush Fire at the River Bottom out in Buckeye and he wanted to go see it.  {Pixs scattered thruout this Post that I took.}  So, we drove out there, a lot of people had gone to see it, from a Safe Distance, Photographing it.   I got him so close to it he'd of had to Help them Fight it to get Closer.  *Winks*  That made him Happy.  *Smiles*

  The Kids joked that they were afraid with all going on putting out Fires in our Personal Lives all the time, I'd just Drive me and their Dad into the Fire and say, Fuck It!?   Coz I wasn't picking up their Calls and they're like, well, she's driven INTO the Fire!!!!!!????  *LOL*   We resisted doing a Pyro Thelma and Louise tho', Death by Fire doesn't appeal to me at all.  *Winks*  We just took Pixs and so long as he was looking at that he was Fine.  Afterwards I took him to "Ed's Fish & Chips" for some Comfort Food somewhere Familiar, we ate it in the Truck tho' coz his Feet are swelling to where none of his Shoes fit now.  So he was in his Ankle Socks.  Hard to get him in and out of a Vehicle and using his Walker anyway.

But, he enjoyed his Scallops and Chips.  He enjoyed driving past our Old Historic Home, he likes the Older Memories more now, he recalls them more than something or anything more recent.  Which, makes sense.  Sadly, the big Saguaro near the Back Art Studio Cottage Driveway had broken in half and completely taken down a huge section of the Adobe and Rock Wall.  So sad, don't know if the Saguaro got some rot, Saguaro are having a difficult time with Climate Change and many are dying and falling over. 

 Or, if someone hit it with a Vehicle and causing that much damage to it and the Wall?  Hard to tell, I took some Pixs.  {See Above}  I felt incredible sense of Loss, the Structure had stood well over a Century and it took a lot of Force to destroy it like that, but several sections have gone down since we Sold the Property.   This is just the most recent damage.  I feel eventually Mr. Avila may just take all of the surrounding Beautiful Old Rock and Adobe Wall down, he may just have to.  You can't Restore everything or Save it, much as you might try or want to.  The Man was absolutely Fine with the whole Outing, but when we got Home, he had another Emotional Meltdown.  He's feeling like a burden and acts like these surroundings are suddenly not familiar enuf for him to be comforted by or with.

I don't know what to do about that, we've only lived here Six Years so if his Dementia is taking him Back In Time, as the Disease is prone to doing, he may not remember this place anymore and it's unfamiliar enuf to be giving him serious Anxiety now?  I've got a Cardiac Appointment for him on Monday and Tuesday Nurse Remi comes.  I Plan to ask them both what I should do?  I think he definitely needs either Anti-Anxiety Meds or Meds for Dementia now to ease his Mental and Emotional Torment.   The Physical deterioration is difficult enuf, but the Mental and Emotional deterioration is Heart wrenching.  And the Kiddos aren't handling it well at all, it's scaring them a lot, it's scaring me a lot, nobody really knows how to navigate thru any of this as it's progressing so rapidly you can't keep up with it and keep pace to adjust to it.

I want him to feel Secure and Safe, as well as Protected.  And he's feeling none of that right now.  It's hard tho' when he's acting like he's got something or someone after him, trying to 'Get' him!  On some levels he said he knows it's all in his Head, but it's still Terrifying to him.  He's calling whatever it is "Monsters" and I'm thinking it more Bad Wartime Memories re-surfacing and that's pretty Monstrous.  He's endure a LOT of Combat, Years and Years worth over a 39 Year Military Career in several Branches of the Service. 

  He was a Special Forces Sniper in the Marines, a Field Medic in the Army, and an Electronics Technician in the Air Force.  He's also been, in shorter Civilian Careers, a Paramedic, and when he was in Law Enforcement after Vietnam, he was an Undercover Narcotics Cop infiltrating Syndicated Outlaw Biker Gangs.  So, needless to say, he's seen A LOT that you can't Unsee nor Forget.  And much of it from time to time comes back to Haunt him a lot as he's gotten Older.

I put him to Bed early, and Mercifully with the Melatonin he takes, he's drifting off to Sleep now, which gives the Family some rest from our Anxiety of seeing him that way and being unable to do anything for him.  Tonight it was a total Panic Attack he was having where he senses he was in Danger even tho' no Danger existed and no actual Threat was involved.  But, I know enuf to know it's Real enuf to them.  The Daughter and Grandson have Psychotic Schizophrenic Episodes that are similar.  Princess T and The Son suffer from intense Anxiety at times that renders them non-functional. 

 So, I'm not "New" to Caregiving for those who have Anxiety and Panic Attacks or Psychosis.  It's always very unpredictable tho' how they'll react when they perceive Danger or a Threat that is Real to them in the Moment.  Or even if Logically they know it isn't, it FEELS like it still is and their Body reacts accordingly.  I personally Felt he knew on a visceral level something was trying to Take him OUT of this Realm and he was Fighting it.

The intense Fear, sense of Doom, Sweating and Chills, Shaking, Pounding Heart, difficulty Breathing and the Head and Chest Pain ARE very Real from a Physical standpoint when having either one.   Typical Fear responses are different since no actual Threat is involved with an Anxiety or Panic Attack and sometimes they won't even know what Triggered it or is causing it.  He just has been saying he doesn't wanna be here anymore and the Monsters in his Head are trying to get him. 

 He's looking around like he's trying to locate them and you can see the Terror in his Eyes, it's unsettling and in his Mind I don't know Where he is in that Moment?  Is he in a Memory of a Wartime Place again?  And, I also felt he is in imminent Danger from actually Dying from whatever is going haywire in his whole Body, be it his Brain deterioration or Bodily deterioration, and so he's in the Fight OF and FOR his Life!!!   When your Brain and Body Turns against you it is Terrifying and can be confusing if it's compromising your Function in various ways.

 I dunno, I can't tell what this Unknown Enemy he is Fearful of even is for sure, Instinct is tho', it could be The Grim Reaper?  And there have been times in the Past where the Ghosts of who he had to Neutralize come back to Haunt him and take him to where ever they inhabit and have since Vietnam.  As a Sniper for the Military, he had specific Targets, not random ones.  And he was always successful with every Mission and Target they gave him.  In the past, sometimes they'd come back to 'Visit' him but in a Nice way... like coming to sit with him on some Park Bench, no animosity to what War just ends up Creating in the way of the Casualties of it. 

 But, now what's coming to 'Visit' him seems more Threatening and Ominous, like a Revenge of sorts settling Scores.  And that's not Good.  And with the deterioration he's going thru Physically and Mentally, it's quite Terrifying to him, and I can't even Imagine what that's like?  The Son was in Tears seeing his Dad like this.  The Man has always been so Strong, a Bad Ass, a legitimate War Hero, and Fearless, seeing him Vulnerable is so Hard.  He's asked to be taken to the VA Hospital, so, we're heading there now, it must be real Bad for him to ask me to take him there...  

 He has NEVER asked in recent Years to be taken to the VA Hospital for Mental Evaluation becoz he felt he may want to Harm himself or that he feels something may Harm him that he can't see and therefore can't confront directly, which is Scary shit, to be sure, when your Health and Mental Health turn against you like an Enemy you must Fight, Wrestle with constantly, and try not to Succumb to.   He's not the Young Marine pictured Below anymore, he's a Frail 74 Year Old cognitively declining Man trying to stay and Act Tough and feeling quite vulnerable and exposed.

Well, I ended up staying up a full 24 Hours due to the ER Visits.  We got to the VA and the Psychiatrist there remembered us ALL, the whole Family, in great Detail, from over a Decade ago!!!  We must be a Memorable bunch.  *Bwahahaha, ya think?!  Winks*  Either that Man has the greatest Memory ever, or we're completely Unforgettable!?  *Smiles*  I just Imagined all the Patients he's seen over a Decade and that he'd recall every minute detail of our Case was Mind Blowing to me!  He remembered how many Adult Children we had, how we were Raising The G-Kid Force and their Ages then and now... Wow!  Anyway, he felt we'd have to address the Health aspect before the Mental Health one coz they were definitely intertwined and The Man not Well enuf this time for the Psyche Ward, too Medically Fragile.  Below is the Full Back Flash that my Native American Cousin had who was USMC Special Forces too.  The Grim Reaper finally came for him last Year.  He was as Tough as The Man is... but... when it's Time... you Go.

But, anyway, the VA Shrink, Dr. Patel, felt we were reaching the place to where Advancing Level Of Care Inpatient was definitely coming.  In order to meet The Man at his Point Of Need if things don't improve or deteriorate any further.   He said I've done remarkably Well for this long, he expected this juncture over a Decade ago and we've forestalled it here at Home.  But Home may no longer be possible pretty soon, I agree, but... Placement is sketchy for us and Dr. Patel knows it, he KNOWS The Man's level of Care needed.  Placements balk at taking him on. 

 But for his Safety and for ours, if he detaches completely from Reality and felt everything or everyone had become a Threat and was having Suicidal Ideology or Defensive Ideology to a degree he'd Act upon either.  His Military Training is such that it could be dangerous, and I know this Fact.  Even your average Soldier is a Trained Killer, but a Special Forces Trained Soldier is a Killing Machine who is very effective and usually efficient. 

 But, when the Medical Team got involved and ran their Tests, they realize The Man had been Bleeding internally from his Gut, pissing out Blood to the extent he needed an immediate Transfusion!!!     They began that at the VA and finished it at the Hospital he Transferred to.  He needed Two Units of Blood and I don't know if the Internal Bleed is stopped or not but they've given him Medicine for a Gut Leak of it... I don't understand the whole Medical aspect of it all... doesn't sound good tho'.  Especially if he already Bled Out about Two Units of Blood into his Gut and pissed it out in a matter of Days!

The Color of his Urine had alarmed me and I'd said so.  His Digestion is fucked up and has been and his Kidneys don't seem Right either.  I was spot on again with all of that, before Medical Professionals confirmed it, as it turned out.  His Docs told him he's Lucky he has a Perceptive Loved One whose Gut Instincts {no Pun intended concerning HIS Gut Issues}, tended to be eerily accurate.   Sometimes I just have a 2nd Sense about shit that I know nothing about actually and it is hard to explain except to someone who has Knowledge of those things and is shocked someone with no Knowledge of them can still be so accurate based on Intuition or Premonition. 

 Anyway, along with that... since, we're not thru with what was quickly going Sideways with him that I'd also sensed along with the Bleed AND the Mental unraveling...  his Heart Enzymes were off again also and his Heart was not doing well AGAIN! Jesus... so there needed to be a Cardiologist Hospital Caring for him, they at the VA are not one!!!  Luckily they do now have a Cardiologist of Two on Staff to make a Call on what to do.  *Whew*

So, by Two in the Morning they were getting Transport back to Abrazo, which is the Heart and Stroke Specialty Hospital near our Home I've been taking him to.  I only hadn't taken him there first only becoz a Retired G.I. having extreme PTSD and Flashbacks is not someone you want to dump on the Civilian Sector, they don't have the Training to handle it, the VA does.  Even their Security gets skittish when a Soldier goes Postal and then it all goes sideways badly.  The VA had their enormous Security with us at all times, just in case, and that does give you a sense of more Security than Fear that things will just go sideways if your Loved One completely unravels and in their Minds are at War again trying to Survive it. 

 The Man was definitely at that juncture and I've been Married to and Raised by Career Military to KNOW it for Sure!  And, I feel we're being Passed Around AGAIN like a Decade Plus ago and that's Scaring me... he's like a Hot Potato nobody in The System wants to Hold for long lest they get Burned badly.  He is an Escape Risk big time!  He's Escaped every Facility they ever tried to 'Hold' him against his Will in!  If he thinks he's Captured and a POW, he's Escaping come Hell or High Water! 

 And off and on he'd detach and not know where he is and if the Kiddos and I aren't there ALL the time to remind him, he's not taking the Word of someone he doesn't recognize or Trust and thinks they are The Enemy.   And... that's never Good and gets hinky fast.  And he gets understandably Terrified he's a Prisoner of War and MUST Survive and Escape Capture... any way he can and remove any Threat that stands in his way.  It all Scares the shit out of me.  He's Old but he's still Capable of more than your Garden Variety Frail Fragile Sick Old Man.

So, anyway, The Son and The Daughter had accompanied me to the VA to take him there, just before Dark.  But their Friend Steven came to get them and take them Home after it was clear, this was a Long Haul again.  Two in the Morning I was driving my dead beat tired Ass back across the Valley in the usual Crazy Saturday Night-Sunday Morning Traffic of the Weekends in the City... to the other Hospital.  Where Sayde had already driven The Young Prince so I'd have Family there with me at that Situation.  They already had a Room for him on the "Secure Ward" he was in last time, lest he try to Escape, since he's very disoriented.  But the Docs at the VA felt that the loss of Blood had caused his Brain to be Oxygen Starved and why he was acting so Bizarre and disoriented and hallucinating, and Weakening so much, so that did make Sense. 

By Five in the Morning, a full 24 Hours since I'd Woke Up to take The Grandchild to Work that Morning, I was able to finally leave to go Home.  The Young Prince's Brown Recluse Bite was Painful to him so they'd given him an Ice Pac to put on it and he really Needed to go Home and Rest also.  He's on Meds for all that, so I got a LOT going on at Home too with the Caregiving of "The Others", who all were unraveling as to be expected, about their Dad/Grandpa.  

 I was getting a Text Message from Brad that what he'd had to Buy to Repair the Pool Situation was $100, which was well under what replacing a Pump would have cost and he didn't charge for any Labor, so it wasn't Free, but was Reasonable.  But I don't know how to do shit like Zell, Cash App, Venmo or Apple Pay.  So I may just ask him if he can Debit our Regular Account we pay him Automatically with for the Monthly Maintenance instead?  So, Brad is gonna just do that now, just talked to him.

So now I'm Square with Bills for the Month, whew, until Medical ones and an Ambulance Transport rolls in for whatever we'll get hit with that Insurance won't Cover?   For this latest Medical Emergency, since, there have been so freakin' many I can't keep Pace Physically, let alone Mentally or Financially, Christ on a Bike!!!   I got a Text from some ABC Ambulance Company in April saying we owed them for a Transport that never even happened!!!   I'm disputing it coz I'm not paying for something they never did and I never Called and asked for.

   So I'm still trying to sort that shit out and I think it's when The Fire Dept. had to come here to the House for The Man and some Ambulance but Fire and Rescue told them they weren't needed... but I bet they're still Billing us Hundreds for being Called... tho' WE didn't Call them and didn't require them, so I have no Idea who did?  I just know Insurance no longer pays for Ambulances no matter if they ARE absolutely necessary to Save a Life!!!   And a usual Transport is close to Two Grand a Trip now!!!  That can fucking add up fast.   Below is my Fav Pix of how I usually Feel these days... LOL.

*******

That's all I can Write about Today... Dawn... The Bohemian

Good News ~ Bad News ~ Organized Chaos

 Well, Good News Bad News to start off this Post.  The Son got called by the "Dollar Tree" Store for the part-time minimum wage Job, which, is, at least something and Walking distance from our Home.  Yay.  Now, for the Bad News, he needs his Birth Certificate and Social Security Card, which I keep for both Adult Kids in their Baby Books coz they lose every fucking thing all the time.  But, The Daughter has been Organizing for me, which was necessary... and Re-Organizing what I'd already Organized, which, wasn't necessary.  And guess what she moved, so it's not in the place I always keep them and can easily find them?  Yep, and now she can't recall where she put his... or mine... just hers and her Sons, which doesn't Help and even theirs ain't where they SHOULD be so they don't get Lost too!!!

So, I had to drop him off without them, and Hopefully they'll still let him start and get Copies to them later?  Then she proudly tells me, well, at least I Found my set of Keys to the 5th Wheel... well, Splendid, coz she'd Lost or Misplaced those Weeks ago and had to use mine.  But now mine are MIA and she THINKS she still has them.  Oy Vey.  These Two would lose their Head if it wasn't attached to their damned Shoulders, I swear!  They have worse Memory Care Issues, probably due to Years of Substance Abuse that's killed off Brain Cells, than me or their Dad has in the way of Aged Related Memory Care Issues, or his Traumatic Brain Injury and Dementia!!!  *Le Sigh*  When you have Special Needs Kiddos it's that way For Life, it ain't getting any better.  When I'm Gone, well, I just don't know what will become of any of 'em?

But, he was Jazzed, after being out of Work and Laid Off since before Thanksgiving of 2025, to FINALLY have any Job Opportunity.  Lotsa places saying they're Hiring, but, they're really not.  And, I'm hearing that from a lot of Peeps looking for Work, whether in High Tech Fields, Corporate America, or Blue Collar Jobs, even Minimum Wage Jobs.  A lot of Technology and AI is already replacing People, and, the Economy is so shitty that places are cutting back to stay solvent and a Reduction In Force is usually what happens first.  They'll just spread the Work among whose left and they can't complain or they'd just be Laid Off then too and everything just spread out even thinner with whoever is left and being exploited and overworked as well as likely underpaid... and with few, if any, Benefits.

So, anyway, I was Sweating Bullets in The RV Garage Mahal looking for said Baby Book in vain with The Son when The Man's Home Nurse John showed up.  They couldn't find me so I guess that all went okay and John said he'd Release him after next visit.  His Wound Care went well so we don't really Need John anymore.  Actually Nurse Remi could have done what they sent John to do and she said she just will, it's not a problem if he has another Wound Issue, she can Dress it and look after it for him.  But, she's contracted thru the VA and John was contracted thru our Medicare Advantage Plan and they wanted their contractors monitoring that Wound and Aftercare.  So... whatever... so long as it's Paid For and Covered by Insurance, any of them, I don't Care. 

I Priced a bunch of Merch to take into Inventory before the Weekend.  But, I haven't, coz nobody is Home now to watch The Man for me so I can, and he's not Well enuf to be dragged along to the Antique Mall yet.  I dropped The Son off at the Dollar Store to fill out his 1099's and such.  When his Sister gets back Home from her Side Job she's at I told her the Highest Priority is her looking for where she moved those damned Baby Books from and put them back, ALL of them!!!  Anything I've already Organized or Styled doesn't Need anyone to Touch it anymore, that's the New Rule.  *Winks*  I appreciate them doing what hasn't yet been Done coz it Needs to get Done, but don't mess up or lose what's already in place, that's all.  Some things shouldn't have to be said, but, you know... *Eye Roll*

I'm just Glad that The Son will have some Paid Employment again, he was becoming so despondent coz he's never been out of Work this long since he was only 14 Years Old!!!  He's a hard Worker and an Asset to any Employer.  He learns quickly and is almost Savant with the type of Autism he has... and he's skilled at a lot of things and if they're willing to Teach him more New things, he's Game for that with any Employer.  He's got Adult ADHD like I do and we can't be Still, so keeping us busy is not something we view as a Negative, we LIKE to be busy and get things done in Record Time.  I'm not bragging, but even at my Age, I can work Circles around most People and am faster than even Co-Workers in their Prime.  I can still Type faster than anyone I've ever known, I can still lock up any System if I try to Type faster than it can handle the number of Keystrokes.   And I can do it with usually 98% Accuracy too!  *LOL*

And that's with Arthritic Hands now, but, I have worn the Numbers and Letters off every Keyboard I've ever Worked on and put worn divots in the Keys that you can feel the indentations of from Use.  *Smiles*  I can bang out one of my Epically LONG Posts in no time and I can Type almost faster than I can Think.  And I Think very fast coz my Mind Spins at Warp Speed all the damned time.  *Ha ha ha*   Sometimes I can't turn my Thoughts Off and am so Hyper that only very Strong Coffee can Calm me Down enuf to Relax or Feel Tired enuf to be Still long enuf to Fall Asleep.  I should probably have always been on Medications.  *LOL*  But, I have the worst adverse Side Effects to any Psyche Meds they ever tried to put me on, so, I don't take anything for all of it from a Mental Health Standpoint.  I am OCD and Bipolar as fuck too, and probably somewhere on the Autistic Spectrum {undiagnosed tho' for that}!!!

When I was a Kid they didn't have Advanced Mental Healthcare at all so they just told my Parents vagaries like I was 'busy' and 'high strung', had above Average Intelligence and Bored easily, so, keep me Challenged and try to keep me out of Trouble.  *Ha ha ha*  That last part... well, there were some Stories!  *Winks*  Like the time we were Stationed in France and at Age 2, well, I stood in the Middle of the Road of Base Housing with a Big Stick, shaking it at the Base Commanders Car that was coming down the Street and had to Stop!!!  With his Chauffer getting out and saying, "Whose Kid is this!?"  This was when my Dear Dad was only an Airman First Class, and since I looked nothing like either of my Parents, they just said they didn't know whose Kid I was!  *Bwahahahaha*  I finally let him pass... and I guess they just figured I might have been some Feral French Gypsy Child, coz the Gypsies and Algerians used to Sell stuff Door to Door in Base Housing in them days.  *LOL*

And I definitely looked like a little French Gypsy Child and Acted like one too, I was Friendly with some of the French Gypsies there.   I was Working the French Flea Markets with no Money as a Toddler and Negotiating Deals for shit I wanted and had no Money to Buy.  My Parents lost track of me all of the time coz I was so Hyper.  And when they'd find me I'd have all the Free Shit I'd haggled for.  They'd check with the Vendors to make sure I hadn't Stolen it.  *LOL*  And I'd end up with it to Keep too, with Vendors just giving it to me.  Coz I spoke 5 Languages Fluently back then and the Flea Market Vendors, of every Ethnicity, thought I was Adorable and a lil Hustler, speaking to them in whatever their first Languages were, they appreciated my Toddler Game and my bold Hustle.  *Bwahahahaha*  I was kinda Cute, I had very Dark Skin but Blonde Hair and Grey Eyes, and only Weighed 16 lbs. at Age 2, so was Tiny.

My Mom endeared herself to the Algerians who Sold the kinds of Merch she liked to Buy like Jewelry and Tapestries from Algeria.  Only the Algerian Men were smitten with her and always wanted to take her away to the Casbah!  Even tho' she had Two Small Kids in Tow and was Married, didn't matter to them, they were persistent those Algerian Men.  Who were Handsome and always carried this big curved Knife on their Hips.  So, after we bought all we wanted of Tapestries and Bling from them, Mom would not answer the Door when they'd come around and have us all Hide until they went away.  *LOL*  And we learned quickly not to Buy Bunnies from the French Gypsies.  Mom initially thought they were Selling them as Pets, 'til she Agreed to Buy one for me and the Woman slit it's Throat right there and then to show her it was Fresh to EAT!  My Mom almost Fainted and she said I Screamed!  Funny Story now, not so Funny back then, and traumatic as it was happening. 

Much later, when we lived in England during my Dad's last Overseas Assignment and Tour of Duty before Retirement, I was a Teenager.  I worked the British Flea Markets, which had a lot of Irish Gypsies, Pakistanis, and East Indian Vendors.  I worked my Hustle there too and began working for an Old Irish Gypsy who taught me everything he knew.  He Sold Gold and Silver Jewelry, not fake either, and did a lot of Business Trading with the East Indians who were Flea Market Vendors.  So we always had lovely East Indian Meals prepared Fresh.  But it was hard Work setting up and taking down the Tents he Sold out of.  Sometimes he Paid me in Cash, sometimes in Trade if I wanted Gold or Silver Jewelry for myself or my Mom.  He once gave me a Fav Ring, a Sterling Silver Snake Ring with Burmese Ruby Eyes, I LOVED it.

Sometimes I'd do some Side Work for the East Indian Vendors he knew and rather than pay me, they'd Trade me some of their Gorgeous Exotic Velvet and heavily Hand Embroidered Kurta Tops, which I looked really good in.  And some of the African Vendors had African Trading Bead Necklaces and Colorful Caftans and Dashikis, that I'd Work in exchange for them to Trade me for that Merch rather than Pay me.   I always dressed Exotic Hippie Style like that, even tho' most of my Peers in High School were wearing Jeans and looking more Pedestrian and scruffy.   Well, except for all my Black Friends at School, who always had Swagger and cutting edge Style.  *LOL*  The Black Guys at School wore "Walking Suits" in the early 70's. {Similar to See Above new Modern Retro Style 70's Wear} Our School was about Half Minority Students, since our Military has been a way out of Poverty and into a Career, it's why my Dad and many of his Family on the Rez Enlisted.

A very faded Polaroid of me Circa Early 1970's in one of those Velvet Embroidered Hand Embroidered Kurta Tops I Traded Work for with the British East Indian Vendors before we moved to Arizona.  I Loved those Tops and had a whole Closet full of them, the East Indians would make them in the Tiny Sizes, coz back then I Wore an American Size 1 and pickin's were slim for someone that Small.  I think my Top Weight before I had Kids was 98 lbs. and usually more around 93, so I was smaller and skinnier than Princess T even is now.  Hard to Believe, but True.  I only Weighed 128 when I Delivered The Son at Age 28, who was a 10.6 lbs. Baby at Birth!!!  Yeah, Ouch, coming out of Hips as Slender as a 14 Year Old Boy's and I was almost 30!  *Bwahahahaha*  As I recall I weighed less than 110 when I Delivered The Daughter and she was 8.2 lbs..  I had easy Births compared to a lot of my Big Friends who you'd think would have no problems giving Birth, with their Wide Hips, but, did.

I just got Chinese Takeout for Lunch/Dinner, squeaking in only moments before they quit the Cheaper Luncheon Menu.  *Whew*  I got Mongolian Beef, Cashew Chicken, Kung Pao Chicken, Sweet & Sour Pork, Eggrolls, Steamed Jasmine Rice, Fried Rice.  Everyone could sample whatever of it they wanted when I got the Four Luncheons Home to split Four ways.  Princess T was going out to Dinner with Rusty, her Boyfriend, so she wasn't eating here... and The Daughter is at a Friend's Home, so it was just all the Guys and I here to eat it.  The Grandson only can't eat Pork, he has Gut Issues with Pork Products so just doesn't eat them anymore.  The Daughter and her Kiddos all have Gut Issues and Food Intolerances, mostly Lactose, but Princess T was allergic to so much more than Lactose as it turns out when they did the Testing for what she has Sensitivities to.  Lord, she was basically Food Allergic, poor thing!  *LOL*   Her Brother and Mom only slightly less so.

On the First of the Month we can splurge some, but, not much anymore.  I've got to take The Son to another Job he has way across the City, with the Price of Gas I'm not thrilled about how far the Job is, don't feel it's worth it but he's Cultivating a Contact with a Private Contractor who wants him to join the Team for Side Jobs.   She owns her own Business and he used to work with her when they both worked for a Company, he likes working with her and this could turn into something more lucrative as she gets more Contracts.  She's a Subcontractor tho' and that's always a risk coz a lot of Contractors tend to Stiff their Subcontractors and not Pay them.  So, he's cautious and seeing how it goes.  Right now he Needs any Work and most of the higher paying Jobs/Contracts are in the North and East Valley where the Money is.  More affluent folks live in the East and Northeast Valley, so you can get the big paying Jobs there for Wealthy Clients with Deep Pockets.

So, I guess I'll have to hang out on the Eastside while he's doing this Job with her.   But, I don't like using up that much of my expensive Gas coz it's costing me $100 to fill up now and that's being frugal with how often I do.  Gas just went up another Dime in the last 24 Hours!  So, it does worry me, we're on a Fixed Income.   I can't stretch a Fixed Income coz there's no prospect really of increasing it much, if at all, any kind of way with discretionary Income Needed for Cost of Living Increases at the current Inflationary Rate. 

 It's spiraling out of control and most American Wages can't even keep Pace, let alone American Retirees or those having Job Insecurities and Food Insecurities already, or can't afford basics like Rent or keeping their Vehicles gassed up so they have transportation access, with these skyrocketing Prices.  Nobody is getting Relief in the way of actual Tax Breaks for Ordinary Folks either, we still Owed a lot.  And that tapped out most folks Savings if they Owed Taxes big again.  I was fortunate my Grandchild paid for it for us this Year.  I simply didn't have it.

We've got Six Mouths to Feed and only One Minimum Wage Income coming in from a Job right now.  And Fixed Income from Retirement Pensions for he and I, and Disability The Man Earned by being 100% Disabled from his Military and Dept. Of Defense Service.  We spent a Lifetime Working hard at Careers to have a Retirement where we didn't have to Work, and in his Case he can't even Work or Care for himself, so, I can't really Work a Real Job either with being a Full Time Unpaid Caregiver to him.

   Listen, if I didn't have that preventing me from Working, I might consider getting a part-time Job to make ends meet easier, so long as I wasn't penalized by Social Security for doing so.  But if you Earn over $24,480 and you are under FRA, you get Penalized a whole Dollar for every Two Dollars Earned over!  If FRA it goes up to $65,160 a Year before Penalties kick in, which are then $1 for every $3 over.  I'm now over FRA of 67 so there would be no limit on Earnings... FINALLY... Whew!  So, Yeah, I'd consider it to alleviate Financial Stress.

There's gonna be a huge dump of Family Photos and Food Porn Images in this Post, I've been trawling my Photo Archives and Folders Online I keep all my Images in.  I'd been looking for some of my BFF who just Passed Away Yesterday, for the Tribute Post that will Publish just before this one.  Along the way I found other Favorites of Family and Friends, so decided to include them too.  I haven't been doing much Photography coz I haven't been going anywhere to.  Gas being so high, just taking The Son to this Job Tonight used all my Gas to where the "Lights" came on the Dashboard telling me I only had 50 Miles worth of Gas left, so... remember to fill up!!!  *Le Sigh*  When I put $20 in it only gave me 4 Gallons, but that's all the Cash on Hand I had until our first of the Month Pay hit.  Otherwise, I wouldn't have had Gas Money.  It's getting critical and I hear in Cali it's up OVER $7 a Gallon now!!!  When they go up Arizona usually does too coz we use the same Refineries there.

I'm already livid that it's almost at $6 a Gallon and going up exponentially every single Day now, by increments of a Dime or more Daily, which, is ridiculous and scary!!!  Becoz soon the Reserves will run out and then we'll have Shortages, so that will spike prices even more and once Shortages happen on anything, Panic sets in with the Public like it did with Food and Toilet Paper during the Pandemic.  When a Run on an essential happens, they shit gets Real.  And so I'm bracing for that, coz, it's not like you can stockpile Gasoline!!!   I don't know anyone who owns a Hybrid Vehicle or an Electric One, tho' I do see them all over the City and they're becoming relatively popular but have their own Issues that are significant.  Enuf so that I don't want one.

 

As you can see by my Lead Images, over by where I dropped The Son off at that Job, was my favorite "Whole Foods", which, they don't have any in the West Valley.  So I went in to the Bakery and ended up with the Frangipani Tart, which was spendy, but, fuck it, I WANTED it.  And if we don't deserve it, who does, Right?!  *LOL and Winks*  And, it was delicious, tasted as good as it looks, so The Man and I had some as soon as I got it Home.   It was quite large and all I bought while there.  But I did also stop at a "World Market" and get some Macadamia Nut Honey from Hawaii, and some Lavender Blueberry Jam too, and some Japanese Imported Mochi in Three Flavors. {See Below}

I Love Gourmet Foods and "World Market" was somewhere my Mom and I always Shopped Together so she could get her British Import Foods from Home that normally she couldn't find in American Grocers.  Phoenix also has a lot of Fine International Grocers, in fact, my Ex-DIL's Cambodian extended Family Owns most of them in Maricopa County that are Asian Grocers.   But there are Arabic Grocers, African Grocers, Eastern European Grocers, East Indian Grocers, Mediterranean Grocers, Hispanic Grocers, Russian Grocers, European Grocers, and several International Bakeries all around the Metro Area too.  We have diversity in a City of this size and I just Love that about Metro Phoenix.   I feel decadent putting a Gourmet Jam or various types of Honey on something as simple as a piece of Toast or an English Muffin.   I am a Food and Beverage Snob, I ain't gonna Lie, it's one thing I won't Cheap Out on, I Buy the Best I can Afford, always.

Above is The Daughter in her early Teens, Below is me with a Newborn Young Prince, and The Son, who was an Uncle yet again and he HATED it!   *Ha ha ha*  Since he became an Uncle so Young, as a Grade School Aged Youngest of our Brood, he didn't like us being Grandparents already.  He hadn't had us all to himself all that Young and his Sisters are quite a bit Older than him.  So Sharing us was not easy for him to embrace or being like a Brother to the Nephew and Niece that we became Custodial Grandparents to at their Birth.  It had been difficult enuf for him when his Older Nieces were Born and the Oldest only came to visit as a Toddler.  He was adamant that you shouldn't be called a Gramma or Grandpa until you had White Hair!!!  *LOL*

That was his Criteria... ha ha ha... and so by that Standard I still wouldn't be called Gramma and I'm already a Great-Gramma to several.  So, it wouldn't have worked out.  My Dad Died with Blue Black Hair in his 70's, as did most of his side of the Family, most never went Grey, Silver or White Haired.   Mom's Side went premature Silver quite often, including my Younger Brother, who takes after her side of the Family more.  He had Blue Black Hair like Mom and Dad, Mom went Silver in her 30's and he started going Silver in his 30's too, but, never lost much Hair and always had thick wavy Hair I was envious of.  Mom's Family had the very coarse Curly Hair... I got the Native American Texture and Straightness instead, but, I'm one of the only Family Members with Light Hair.  I'm told a Great-Great-Grandfather on Mom's Irish Maternal Side of the Family had Red Hair.  Tho' all the other Irish and Welsh Family Members had the Blue Black, so that pesky Recessive Gene showed up.  All my Native American Relatives have Blue Black Hair.

Above Two of the Great-Grands who are Sisters, they have a Younger Brother.   And Below is a Granddaughter with her Oldest Child, her Youngest is a Girl.  Their Youngest Sister has yet to Marry or have Children, I don't know if she wants any or ever will tho', not a Priority and she's 24, so has time to make up her Mind about it.   The Young Prince and Princess T don't want Children, Princess T isn't even sure she wants Marriage?   Her Brother, after he gets this Divorce, said he never wants to Marry again and isn't a Breeder, so he doubts he'd end up with Children unless he switches Teams and ends up with a Woman and she wants a Family.  *LOL*   It could happen, he's Dated Women before and considers himself Gender Fluid when it comes to Relationships... even tho' he's a Trans Man who sometimes presents as a Female.

Below is the Little Bother of those Two Sisters... they're the Trio of Great-Grands of our Oldest Granddaughter Back East in Pittsburgh.  Some of the Pixs are Older ones so all the Great-Grands are getting much bigger already than in these Photos.   Anyway, I actually had a good time over in the East Valley and won't Need to bring The Son Home.  He'll be getting a Ride back when they're done with the Job in a few Days.  They'll also be setting up a Paint Booth Tent here beside The RV Garage Mahal for him to do the Painting of the Custom Cabinetry they'll be making for the Clients.  I have the Room, the Owner doesn't yet, since she lives in a Rental at some Nice Apartments and is Scouting for another Commercial Building.   They only do smaller Custom Jobs for Residential Customers, she doesn't wanna branch out and do Big Commercial Jobs and end up with too much Work too soon.  To whom much is given, much is required... you can Grow too fast. 

I wake up this Morning to The Grandson telling me Sayde had to take him to the ER and he'd gotten another Brown Recluse Spider Bite from a different Friend's House than the last time he got Bit by one!!!  Oy Vey, last time it was on the Ass, this time on his Leg, I guess this is a bad Year for them and he's had Bad Luck being attacked by them.  *Le Sigh*  He spent Six Hours there, but I didn't know it coz I wasn't Home yet, I was taking The Son to that Job near Scottsdale.  He got a Ride Home afterwards, but I was still gone for Hours coz it was Rush Hour and I was way over on the Far Eastside.  So, Luckily when he realized what kind of Bite The Young Prince had gotten, when they'd been at their Friend's Home, she took him to the nearest ER.  He has no Insurance so, now I HOPE I can afford the slew of Prescriptions they gave him?!  He'll be added the Cost of the ER Bills to the Stack he already can't Pay from previous Emergencies that required immediate Medical Attention.  *Le Sigh and he shrugs, whaddya gonna doe?*

He's got no Money, is unemployable, and SMI to the Max, so, also Non-Compos Mentis, so he can't enter into any Legally Binding Agreement since he's not competent to.  Anyway they should have signed his Ass up AGAIN and pushed hard to get him on AHCCCS indigent Healthcare Coverage, so that at least they'd get Paid.   And, since he was gone for Six Hours, I didn't know that so The Man was actually here without Caregiver Coverage too!!!  Oy Vey, this is Why leaving The Grandson in Charge is something I hardly never, ever do.  At least Sayde took one for the Team and took The Grandson to the ER and sat with him for Six Hours.  I'd of had to drag The Man along too and that would have been Too Much only a Day after a Best Friend Died.  

And I can't risk exposing The Man and I to a bunch more Sick contagious folks at some ER either.  Every time I go lately I end up getting Sick and not Feeling Good for Days later, catching whatever was going around to bring them to an ER!!!   And he's so frail, and we both have comorbidities so it can become serious or even fatal to us.  So, anyway, I have a stack now of RX to fill for The Grandson, all Body Parts Crossed it's affordable Medications?  I think it was before when he got Bit by one.  At least we got Paid now so I have some Money to cover the Cost of whatever it is, coz, he HAS to have it.  Brown Recluse Bites are no Joke, the Venom eats your Flesh and I've seen some horrific Cases of when folks got Bit and neglected to get immediate Medical Attention.  A Friend at Work has almost lost his entire Shin to the severe Necrotic Tissue Damage!  It's eaten 1/3 of his Shin now and he may lose his Leg and he's a Big Powerful Built Guy.  His Wife showed me the Pixs, it's horrific and terrifying! 

So, the Bad News just keeps on fucking coming, doesn't it?   I took The Man with me to just sit in the Truck while I did Environmental Cleanup at the Park, so he'd be in Fresh Air, Shaded, with the Windows down in the Truck.  It's a Cool Breezy Day.  I got 40 Cents a Gallon off my Gas with my Fry's Discount but it still cost me $78 to fill up!!!  I took him out for Crepes at "Coladas" afterwards, he had the Peach, I had the Mango Kiwi Coconut Pineapple, which is a Summer Seasonal one.  Both came with a Scoop of Coconut Pineapple Ice-Cream.  We sat outside at a Bistro Table and it's next door to where the Pharmacy is to drop off the Grandson's Rx.   Which will Thankfully only be $23 for all Three, when they Pharmacist knew he had no Insurance she put him on their Discount Plan.  Which Saved me a lot of Money, since I told her I had to cover it since he has no Income and no Employment.  Princess T got off Work before 8:30 a.m. coz they had no Work, so she was with me and said she'd cover it if I couldn't.

The East Indian Female Pharmacist looked shocked and said, "You Work?!  And have Money!?", Princess T Laughed and Joked, and said, "Yeah, I'm Twenty... and I work over at SAVERS and I'm a 'Saver'..."  *LOL*  She said people always think she's about 12 and still in Jr. High School, when she's wearing little or no Make-up, sometimes even when she is, coz she's Tiny too.  Most High School Girls these days are as Big as I am, not a Size 3 like she is.  *LOL*  Nobody ever thinks she's an Adult and Twenty, she said sometimes Rusty gets hard looks from people who think he's Romantically involved with an Underaged Girl.  *Ha ha ha*   Anyway, above Pix is The Daughter with my recently Deceased BFF's Older Daughter, who I was the Birth Coach to when she had her Oldest Son as a Teenager.  She did a lovely FB Tribute to her Mom with some Pixs I'd never seen before of her Mom. 

 

And now for our Crepe Pixs, coz, you KNOW you WANT 'em.  *Winks and Smiles*   We were the 1st ones waiting at the Pharmacy before they Opened at 9:00 a.m. and there was a line already forming behind us, so the Pharmacist had to hit the Ground running this Morning.  The Pharmacist came to unlock the Security Gates around it and said, "Wow, you all are up Early... nobody Slept In on this Fine Saturday Morning?!"   And I piped up, "No, and I already had Crepes...", and everyone Laughed.  *Smiles*   And Princess T said in a Bougee exaggerated Pretentious Voice, "Ohhhhh, and she's already had Crepes, La-De-Da...", and everyone really Laughed then.  *Smiles, we get up being Hilarious, what can I say?*

That lil Outing was almost too much for The Man, so I'll go to pick up the Prescriptions Solo, he's had enuf Activity for one Morning now.  He really is having Mobilty and Balance Issues now, it's scaring me actually.  I don't know if we'll get his Leg Strength up to Speed or not?  Or his Heart Strength?   I am thinking of getting him one of those under Desk Ellipse Leg Exercisers for Seniors that are Remote Control and actually move his Legs FOR him, but exercises and strengthens the Muscle with low impact and he can do Seated.   AMAZON has one but I don't use AMAZON or their Prime, never Ordered anything from Bezos in my Life and won't.  Anyway, E-Bay has some too but they're all expensive or from International Sellers, which means, high Tariffs even if the Price was good, not Ordering anything with a Tariff attached to it either, Fuck Donnie Two Dolls and his Tariff Extortion Racket.

That's Right Eli, it's exactly how I Feel too about this Regime!  *Winks and Laughs*   Eli has the Best Feline Facial Expressions ever IMO.  *Smiles*   I know this was an extra lengthy Post dumping Too Much Visually and with the Content, but, I'm Manic when I'm Emotionally Raw and Blogging is Helpful.    LATER: I went to the Discount Grocer and got some great Deals on Non-Perishables we Need and Stock up on, plus they always give me $10 Off my Order.  Now I'll only Need to Buy Perishables for the rest of the Month out of the Grocery Budget.  The Young People at the Discount Grocer who are Cashiers know me by now.  *Smiles*  I come in the 1st or so of every Month now. 

The Daughter is back now, someone loaned her a 10-Speed Bike and she rode the Ten Miles Home on it.  She got quite a Sunburn, but I'm impressed she rode the whole Ten Miles, since, she hasn't ridden a Bike for Years.   Since they're letting her Keep the Bike until they Need it, she may let her Brother ride it to and from Work to the Dollar Store, which is only about a Half Mile from Home.  He could Walk it easily or I could Drive him, but Biking would be quick and good Exercise.  He has someone lined up to buy the Malibu, since, it's not Operational so he might as well Cash Out on it for Salvage, it is Titled, but hasn't ran in a long time and he's put a lot of Money into it to no avail.

In a little while I gotta pick up the Grandson's Rx Meds from the Pharmacy too.   Below are some Family Photos, we never Owned a Camera Growing Up so my Parents would sometimes borrow one of those Old Brownie Cameras from a Friend and that's the only time we got Photos taken and very few as a whole Family.  We never had any Professional Portraits taken.  But, Growing Up we didn't know we were not 'well off' coz my Parents always really made a gorgeous looking Home, Mom had such a Good Eye for The Good Stuff and Dad always Worked Two or more Jobs.  His Military Job and then he always worked as a Master Chef at some High Class Restaurant AFTER Working his Military Shift!

The Photo in the lower Lefthand Corner Above is my Dad in Alaska when he was stationed there for a Year unaccompanied at Murphy Dome.  He looks so Dark coz everything was White... his Uniform, the Snow, the Sky... ha ha ha.   Below Right Hand lower Photo is The Man with our Oldest Daughter at her Wedding.  She's the only one of our Three Kids whose ever actually Married.   Tho' we have several Grandkids who have Married.   The Son and The Daughter have been in long term Relationships that were Common Law Arrangements, not recognized in Arizona coz we're not a Common Law State.   The Far Right Lower Pix is The Daughter and her Friend Amber again at the State Fair Photo Booth, every Year they'd have one taken.  I Love those Pixs too, they always turned out so good.

 

I Love the Meme Below, it's so "Me".  *Ha ha ha*   Well, we Found The Son's Baby Book and I felt like a Putz, coz The Daughter came Home and walked right to it in The RV Garage Mahal.  Guess where it was?  EXACTLY where I'd always put it and The Son and I had looked exactly there numerous times and must have looked right AT it and couldn't Find it!!!   Oooops!!!  Ever do that?  Can't See for Lookin'?  *LOL and Blushes*  The Daughter was like, Mom, how HARD did you and he Look?  Coz it was RIGHT THERE, exactly where you always put it and I'd never moved it, I'd just taken my own Baby Book out to show a Friend my Baby Pixs and hadn't put mine back yet.  So, I told her to put hers back again too so her important Documents would also stay Safe and not Lost.  His Birth Certificates were in there, I have extra Copies.  But, his Social Security Card wasn't coz we recalled he'd asked for it Years ago and has promptly Lost it, of coarse.  *Eye Roll and Le Sigh* 

 

If he'd of given it back to put Safe, and be kept by me, it would still be there.  Oh well, I can see by the Envelope it used to be in... that we've re-ordered it now Three other times, so not the 1st or even 2nd time he's Lost it!!!  *Triple Eye Roll then*   They are a Scatter Brained bunch.  I'm a Creature of Habit and important stuff I always keep in the same place so that it's easily Hands On.  I'm not very Organized, and I work more in the Realm of Organized Chaos.  But Oddly, I know where shit is within my Organized Chaos and nobody can ever figure out how I even do that when it looks Chaotic, but, I know where it all is specifically.  But if YOU Move it, then I won't know where the Hell YOU put it.  And if you don't remember where you did, it might never be Found?!

Below is one of my Fav Pixs of The Daughter with her Son.  Since she was in Mexico almost 20 Years, I don't have many Pixs of her with The G-Kid Force as Children... practically None with her and Princess T, only a scant few of her with The Grandson, whose her Oldest of Five Kids... the other Four being Daughters, Three of which were Born and Live in Mexico.  The G-Kid Force and her Three in Mexico try to have a functional Relationship with their Mom.  It's challenging due to the level of her Mental Illness and Substance Abuse History, plus, her inability to really connect Relationally.  Or to make good choices and decisions on a consistent basis.  They have to be the Adults in the Room with her... and that will never change and they are all Old enuf now to know this.   So, these Two don't want to become too close, they're wary to, and I understand why they are, it could be Hurtful to.

Below is me at Age Two and a Half with my Little Brother at Age 6 Months, he outweighed me!!!  *LOL*  He had the Peaches and Cream Complexion like our Mom and I was Darker like our Dad.   But he had the very Curly Blue Black Hair like our Mom and I was a Honey Blonde, which darkened to a Light Brown as I got Older.  He was such a good and Happy Baby, I on the other Hand was NOT... LOL... I was what they used to call "A Handful" as a Child.  *Winks*  My Brother therefore was The Golden Child.  *Smiles*  And he's been a Wonderful Brother my entire Life, I've never met anyone that didn't Adore my Lil Brother, who, isn't so little really. coz by his Sophomore Year in High School he was 6'4" and towered above even most of the Seniors.  But, he's one of those Big Gentle Fellas.

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Okay, so, we're Done now... Winks... Dawn... The Bohemian