Keeping it 100... And, Yet Another Loss

The Son's Native American Friend, Garrett, Scored both of them some Tickets to a Downtown Concert on Saturday Night.  Garrett have driven into the City from Casa Grande and I said I'd drive The Son Downtown.  What we didn't know if there were massive Freeway Closures for Construction improvements, so Traffic was insane, ADOT had cocked up Detouring Traffic and the Police had made it even more chaotic and nonsensical.  They were diverting Eastbound Traffic WEST for Miles and Miles.  So you spent about an Hour going in the Wrong Direction due to their incompetence at diverting the Closures!  It was horrible and it was 116 Degrees so people's Vehicles were breaking down and overheating in the melee or running out of Gas, impatience and chaos abounded, it was Nightmarish!!! 

I managed to still get him there before it began, but only coz they'd delayed the Concert for some reason.  And then it was an equal Nightmare for me getting back Home even zigzagging thru Surface Street Detours of my own creatively to avoid the worst of the Traffic Jams!  I used up so much Gas going nowhere and being stuck in Traffic.  Had I known about the Closures I might have taken different Routes getting there at least, but they didn't even Warn anyone about them adequately or put Signage up well in advance of you just finding yourself in the midst of a Cluster Fuck they'd created on a busy Saturday Night!  Online, when I Googled WTF was going on, coz nobody knew for sure, if it was a big Accident, or what, it's Closed until MONDAY!!!   Would have certainly been more Helpful to make that more widely known, but, ADOT {Arizona Dept. Of Transportation}, didn't!  Which is typical.

 OMG, you better not need to get anywhere then in a 10 Mile Radius of said Freeway all fucking Weekend then!  And we live within that Radius!!!  Traffic is heavy now on a good day due to overbuilding and not improving infrastructures first!   Poor City Planning, they should have done Transportation Improvements before all of the Development Building and expanding of Population density in an area.  Not running damage control behind what they did to profit off of, it's just messy and chaotic for whose already living there now and must deal with the City doing things Ass backwards.  Anyway, Urban Sprawl tends to work like that, the Short Term Greed of Development means long term Problems for the Communities they've intruded into and made complex Issues for to now try to Solve.

As it is the Zoning has now been mish-mashed and Industrial is being put right by Residential.   High Density Multi-Family Residential is bumping right up against Luxury Residential Properties, badly Negatively impacting their Equity.  Agricultural is being gobbled up too quickly by everything they change the original Zoning to.  So they no longer can Source what used to be Grown Locally anymore, driving up Prices to Import it in now from a distance and have it be nowhere near as Fresh and Healthy, but Cost way more.  It's part of why I Invested in a Mini Farm so that if it all worsens, we could grow what we need ourselves to Harvest and Sell the overage of.  So, anyway, Garrett at least gave The Son a ride Home even tho' he had a very long Ride back Home in the other direction to get back to Casa Grande.

The Son got a helluva Black Eye and Mouse under and over it at the Concert, total accident.  Some Young Teen in front of him got pushed and his Head slammed back into The Son's Face!  He was more concerned for the Kid at first, becoz he was only about 17 and hit hard.  The Son has a very hard Head, but he knew it was a hard hit and thought at first he was okay, then it immediately swelled up and closed, so he had to watch the Concert thru One Eye!  *LOL*  It was a Heavy Metal Concert so... at first I thought he was dumb enuf at 40 to do a Mosh Pit?  *LMAO*  Nope, no Fight, no Mosh Pit, total accident of someone getting shoved and backing into him hard.  The Teen said he knew he'd hit something hard and no Wall was behind him, but felt like he hit a Wall.  *LOL*  The Kid was like, Owwww, the Back of my Head really hurts and The Son is like, how do you think my Face feels?  *LOL* 

Nope, no Wall, just the Old Guy's Face behind you... and of coarse The Son was way bigger than this Teen.  So it was like the Kid had hit a Wall, The Son is sturdy and Muscular.  And asked if that Kid was alright?*Bwahahahaha*  He knows he'll get Teased at Work now, looks like he's been in a Fight and Lost.  He's finishing up our Yardwork this Morning coz we need to bag the Grass and the Garbage goes out Tomorrow Morning for Pickup, so needs to be gathered up and put in there Today.  It started out real Hot, otherwise I'd help him, but he said he's got it and I didn't have to risk re-injuring my sore Back by bending a lot out there and getting overheated.  He's used to working Outside or in Non-Climate Controlled Spaces {in the Trades the Warehouses and Work Sites usually are not Air Conditioned}.

I just had Princess T do a Cash App of the Birthday Money from me to her Brother, I don't know how to do all that and put it into his Savings Account, which he couldn't access from New Mexico.  So, now it's transferred to where he can access it for his Special Day.  He had decided not to come back to Phoenix for his Birthday on account of there is some current Drama between he and his Dad... and The Young Prince's Girlfriend, Sayde.  Yes, he was going out with a Girl who has been a long time Friend, and it has not worked out, so I think they are best off just being Friends, without Benefits.  *Winks*  Sayde always had a Crush on The Young Prince, but he made the mistake of an introduction to his Dad, who has always been a Player, and need I say more, it got awkward fast.  Yes, his Dad is in a Relationship too, but that has never stopped Bobby from being a Player and having no Boundaries, and once a Player, always a Player.  And thus now Allen is back in the Picture anyway, so... so much for the Switch Hitting.  *LOL*

Young Love can become so complicated these days, I can't keep pace with the makeups and breakups, I really can't.  *LOL*  In my day if it was just a Booty Call that's all we made it out to be, not pretend it was a Relationship!  Not so complicated.  *Winks*  Anyway, The Young Prince just didn't wanna Deal with all that here in Phoenix on his Birthday so he decided he wanted to spend it with Allen in New Mexico, which seems like that will be less complicated or awkward really, and I told him so when we discussed the Drama.  My Grandkids and Adult Kids tell me EVERYTHING, so we have those candid discussions about anything and everything, straight up, and keeping it 100%, so I know what's going on with them.  You're only ever as Sick as your Secrets, I've always told them that, and I Believe that, so I'm not a Secretive or Deceptive Person at all.  I'll keep it 100 with you, and if you can't Handle the Truth, that's on you, it's not on me.  I'll always tell you what you Need to Hear, not just what you might Want to Hear.

And The Son was in Tears this Morning, just Yesterday his Childhood Friend Tabitha had been on both our Hearts and Minds and we didn't quite know why, but, we'd talked about her, just Yesterday.  I hadn't seen Tabitha since before her Mom Died and she didn't handle it well coz she and her Single Parent Mom were very close and she was an Only Child.  If you saw Tabby, her Mom was always by her Side, a Team.  Well, The Son found out just this Morning that Tabitha has Died!   A mutual Friend informed him when she found out.   In Grade School, Jr. High School and High School they were very close coz they both got picked on a lot due to their Disabilities.  The Son was Tabitha's Bodyguard thru all those Years, coz we all lived in Da Hood, rough Neighborhood, predominantly Hispanic and lots of Gangs.  Tabitha was Black, a Type 1 Diabetic with Serious Health Issues her whole Life and a very big Girl her whole Life.  Above is the only Pix I still had of Tabby, since, once they all grew up, you didn't see them as much as when they were Kiddos in School and played together a lot.

 Above is a Pix of her Dear Mom, Toria, who Passed in 2025.  She'd been a Teacher and Taught at their Schools, and she'd grown up in the Military and Traveled the World extensively, Military and Ex-Military Families stick together.   So The Son was close with Tabitha's Mom too and so she and I got to know each other thru our Kids being so close and being such good Friends.  There were not many Black Kids in the Student Population, or White Kids, or Native American Kids, or Asian Kids.  The Student Body and Barrio was 99% Hispanic.  Their Friend Andrase used to joke that most of the Black Kids in School there were his Siblings or his Cousins.  And that was the Truth!  *LOL*  So, anyway, The Son could Fight, was Scrappy and Fearless, so if anyone Bullied or messed with Tabitha, they were then Dealing with him handing them their Ass in defense of his Friend.  He was known as the Loco Indio.  It was well known, mess with Tabitha, and he had her Back and she always appreciated him standing up for her, ever since they were little.   Below is Tabitha in Grade School, as I remember her when our Families first met and our Kids were in Kindergarten together, always a Big Smile, such a Radiant Child.

 And he stayed in Touch with Tabitha all thru their Adulthood, but hadn't seen her in a while and knew she'd been not doing well since her Mom's Death.   She dropped off all her Social Media sites too, so nobody knew what was going on with her anymore.  But she had been on our Hearts and Minds at the same time recently... and now we know why.   She Died almost a Year after her Dear Mom.  RIP my Dear, you always were such a Beautiful Spirit and a Ride or Die Good Friend, you will be missed.   The Son was broken Hearted to hear of your Passing.  It made his not Black Eye Swollen too, you'd Laugh about that.  Since he got many a Black Eye standing up for you, but Winning every Fight. *Smiles*  She was Single, no Kids, and her Mom had preceded her in Death, so I don't know if there was any other Family still living?  I think Mom had been her Caregiver right up 'til the End of her Mom's Life, and sadly her Daughter didn't last long after that on her own.  The Worry of every Parent whose Caregiver of a Special Needs Child(ren).  You don't wanna Outlive them, but don't know what will happen to them when you're Gone?

I finished putting all the Grass in the Garbage and to the Curb since The Son is taking his Late Morning Early Afternoon Siesta already.  Now I'll be going down for mine since this was more of a Workout in that Heat and Humidity than going to the Gym and sitting in their Wet Sauna!  I must have Sweat out any Impurities in my whole Body, it was so Swampy out there.  *LOL*  I'm jumping into a Cool Shower or The Pool to Cool Off, mebbe both, then changing into Fresh Jammies newly Organized.  *Ha ha ha*  Since The Son is Asleep I can Skinny Dip and not risk Visual Trauma to him in his One Good Unswollen Eye.  *LMAO*  What with getting Head Butted and Grief, he's had enuf Trauma for one 24 Hour Period!   LATER:  Well, that was refreshing and I feel a lot less grungy now and freshened up, but I'm staying Inside now for the rest of the day, it's brutal out there.  And I figure I've done enough Todaying for Today as well in the way of Home Maintenance.  And there's more Flan in the Fridge and Jell-O with fresh Berries and other Fruit in it that The Daughter made.  Nom-Nom.

Tomorrow Princess T has a Dental Appointment, we're trying to get everyone done before she turns 21 and can't go to her Pediatric Dentist anymore that she's known and gone to all her Life.  She has good Teeth, no Cavities, so it's just preventative Care.   She has Dental on AHCCCS but she also has extreme Anxiety Issues and someone 'New' is never easy for her to transition to.  The Daughter needs a lot of Dental Work and has Insurance for it now too but is Paranoid about going.  The Dental Work she had done previously that I Paid for, didn't last, I think she's going to require Implants or Dentures, which I don't know AHCCCS will pay for, they don't cover a lot, and absolutely nothing remotely Cosmetic or for better Function to Eat, but it's better than having no Dental Care or Coverage, so, not Complaining either.

  I spent a lot on her Dental and The Young Prince's Dental before they got AHCCCS Approved, for Emergency Dental Procedures that couldn't be avoided and had to be Paid out of Pocket.  Neither has Money or means of Support, no gainful Employer will Hire Schizophrenics, so it was on my Dime.  To get her in for Emergency Dental I bought her Two Mike's Hard first and told her to slam them to take The Edge off her going Psychotic once we were in the Dental Chair.  I almost passed out watching what had to be done, that's never happened to me before but I got Faint, probably coz it's my Kid and I'd rather have something awful happening to myself than watching it happen to one of my Kiddos.  She thought it was Funny that I had to drop to the Floor to avoid Fainting dead away, so it made her Laugh and endure what was happening better.  *LOL*  Yeah, we're Twisted in our Humor like that... Hey Look, Mom's almost Fainting and I'm the one having the Procedure... ha ha ha!  *Winks*

Over 25 Years of Meth Use before she managed to get Clean, and living on the Streets with no Medical or Dental Care, or Prenatal Care for having had Five Children, and it's a Wonder she has any Teeth left actually and still looks so good.  She is a Survivor, that's for damned sure, so she never worries about Tomorrow, she's Learned to Live in each Moment and make it Work.   She said her Son is just having to Learn the same coz there is no Cure for what they have and really Society as a Collective isn't sending in the Cavalry to Save anyone.  So only the Strongest will Survive and whatever doesn't Kill you only makes you Stronger.  It's a very Pragmatic approach to Life, but it Works for her and has been why she's probably even still Alive given all she's gone thru already in Life in Two different Countries!!!   I remember she said Long Beach was Scarier than any place she ever lived in Mexico, even areas run by the most ruthless Cartel.  That spoke volumes.

She said when she was trying to find the Bus Station in Long Beach, at Night, after crossing the Border and trying to make her way to Phoenix, the Cops stopped her asked if she was Lost?  Coz, she didn't quite look like a Local at all in the area she was in with a Demographic that looked nothing like her, so she definitely Stood Out. *LOL*  And she told them if they could give her a Ride to the Bus Station, coz indeed she wasn't sure where she was or where it was, she was trying to get to Phoenix, and she didn't wanna have to Stab some Fools if someone took her for an Easy Mark.  She wasn't kidding, I think they sensed she wasn't kidding, her Crazy is sometimes very Innocently apparent... so they gave her a Ride to the Bus Station.  She said in Mexico you'd never ask Police for Help tho'.  And she made it to Phoenix, where we picked her up, and now, several Years later, here we now are.  *LOL* 

 She had a tiny Backpack with One Change of Clothes to her whole Name and that's pretty much how she'd Lived Happily for over 20 Years in Mexico without a Worry or Care in her Heart!  I'm glad that no Gangsta in Long Beach approached her, and the Cops did first, or she may have been up on Charges instead if a Self Defense Plea  didn't work out, or Committed to a Mental Health Facility, when she filleted them like a Fish.  Let us just say she's very handy with a Weapon and Crazy enuf to use one if she feels an imminent Threat confronts her.   But she had no intentions of ever visiting Long Beach again, that's for sure.  If she says she is Scared of some place, then that is a very Scary fucking place to be.  Coz she doesn't Scare easily, if at all, usually, so I can only imagine the Neighborhood she wound up in there that she got dropped off in after she Crossed the Border!!!   She knows folks in L.A., American Friends and Mexican National Friends who live there, but she didn't wanna go to L.A., Phoenix was her destination and she'd already contacted me that she was on her way and coming back Home.

She'd been Clean for Three Whole DAYS, so we weren't sure any of it was gonna Work Out?  And what could go Wrong?  *Bwahahaha*  Especially with Sobriety Holding.  Her Kids didn't know she was even coming and they hadn't seen her in about 18 Years... so... SURPRISE!!!  They Surprisingly are doing better at forming a Relationship with her as she is, and acceptance it won't get better than this, and is WAY Better than she was 20+ Years ago, than I thought was possible, and I'm Happy about that.  I'm Proud of her for doing so much better than I ever thought she would or could actually, especially Mentally and Behaviorally.  Coz, that's never gonna Change and there's no getting "Clean" or Well from Schizophrenia and Dissociative Identity Disorder, that's Forever and no Cures exist.  Psyche Meds typically don't even work that well at all to Manage it, so Two Mike's Hards a Day seems to be Working Out better for her Self-Medicating and not being so Crazy.  Insurance doesn't cover that tho'.  *Bwahahahahaha*  Okay, had to insert some inappropriate Dark Gallow's Humor, coz, why not?  That's Funny, I don't Care who you are!!! *LOL*

So, our Local Chevron Mini Mart Owners, who are a Dear Immigrant Family, know how Crazy my Alcoholic Spawn are, and that they are Not Well... so they give me Deals on the "Medicine".  *Winks*  They know I don't drink, and they make Jokes with me about picking up the "Medicine" for "The Kids", so that we're not Dealing with Mental so much at Home.  *Smiles*  Their One Elderly Uncle wears a Pale Grey Turban and has the same Pale Grey Eyes I do, so he always tells me I have Beautiful Eyes, and then I tell him he does too, and we both Laugh about it.  He's Swarthier than me, so his really stand out and look a bit Eerie and highly Unusual.  For South Asians to have Pale Grey Eyes is even Rarer, and Grey Eyes are already the Rarest Eye Color, less than 1% of us Worldwide. 

  Northwestern parts of South Asia it's less uncommon, so he's probably originally from Kashmir, Punjab or parts of Rajasthan or Uttarakhand.   His Eyes are almost transparently Palest of Grey.  And his Turban and Kurta are Grey so no other reflective Wardrobe coloring that his Eyes pick up.  Mine pick up Color from whatever I'm wearing, I guess it's reflective, coz otherwise they are very Pale Grey too.  This Rarer variant recessive Gene Color of Eyes runs on the Paternal Side of my Mom's Family, my Welsh Roma Gran-Gran and my Mom had the same Grey Eyes I have.   We have quite a few Family Members with Unusual Color of Green-Amber Eyes too, which are striking and people comment on all of the time.  The Young Prince and my Maternal Nanna had them on the Maternal Side of the Family and on Dad's Paternal Side of the Family my Cousin Wewokajanna has them too.   I think Princess T's very Dark almost Black Eyes are Beautiful as well, so Dark they don't look Brown and you can't see her Pupils.

I realized just Minutes ago that my Diamond and Gold Nose Stud had fallen out and I don't know when and I don't know where!?  Never felt it coming out and it doesn't come out easily.  Panicked a bit coz I don't change it out coz my Nose Piercing tends to be difficult to change the Jewelry out of and the Hole has closed up quickly before and needed to be Re-pierced.  I didn't wanna hafta do it a 3rd time coz the East Indian Family that did it the other 2 times closed their Shop and I don't know where they went and wouldn't have anyone else do it.  East Indians have been doing Nose Piercings for Generations as a Culture and do it Right.  Anyway, I called Princess T, who was with Rusty, and told her if she could lend me a Nose Jewelry and if I couldn't get it back in would she do it for me?  She has a Nose Piercing and changes out her Jewelry easily and all of the time, so she agreed.  I found one of her Fancy Diamond and Gold fancier Studs, larger than mine had been but I like how it looks, and lo & behold, I got it in without much trouble at all.  *Whew*  Panic averted.  *Smiles*

As you can see I've done a bit more Decorating, putting some of my favorite LP's in their Covers on Display.  One is CREAM and one is IRON BUTTERFLY.   A clearer look of both Album Covers is Below:

I also Displayed my LAUGH-IN Album Cover behind the Lamp on top of the new Medical Cabinet... clearer look of that LP Cover is Below:

The Album Cover I have {with LP's in every one I still have}, that I most want to Display but need to find a Frame for that is the Right Size for the Fold-Out type Cover it is, was a JIMI HENDRIX EXPERIENCE  Album, my all time Favorite Album Cover:

*******

Chillin' in AC inside all day in the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian 

Another Friend's Passing

I only just found out thru a Memorial Page of FB that another Dear Lifelong Friend passed away, my High School Friend Collette, after battling a Six Month Illness.  She was Survived by her Two Younger Sisters, some Nieces and Nephews, and her only Child, a Daughter, she had no Grandchildren.  Her Daughter is part of the LGBTQ+ Community and Married what appears to be a Trans Man.   I don't know if Collette was Divorced, or if her Husband Died before her, he wasn't mentioned in the Obituary, and she's got her Maiden Name being used, so I can only speculate.  She never moved from Denver, but we lost touch over the Years, mostly due to me moving so often and then of coarse everyone stopped sending Letters and Cards as Time went on.  She worked for the Federal Government for 40 Years in the Defense Department and her Dad was Career Military and was Black and Native American, her Mom was Chinese and White.  So most of us Interracial, Intercultural and Minority Ethnic Military Kids stuck together.   She'd check all the Race Boxes when we were in School and they'd insist on knowing Ethnicity and get Mad at us for not choosing just ONE as our Identity and denying everything else you are.  *LOL & Eye Roll*

    

Collette looked Polynesian so most folks would ask if she was Samoan or from Fiji.  *LOL*  She looked the same as she'd always looked, she was Ageless and such a Beautiful Person, inside and out.   She was Introverted and I was Extroverted, so we were Yin and Yang.  We were so close in High School when Stationed in Great Britain, she had been born over there too, in Liverpool.  I think her Mom was Born in England to a White British Father and a Chinese Mother.   So she had extended Family in Liverpool which is just across the River Dee from my Mom's Hometown of Flint in North Wales.  So we had that in common, that our British Moms had Married American G.I.'s of Color.   And then our Families after that Tour of Duty at Lakenheath and Mildenhall AFB's as their very last Overseas Tour, went back to the United States.  Her Family to Colorado and my Family to Arizona.   We kept in touch for many, many Years when our Kids were little.  

 I'm saddened to hear of her Passing and that it was a long Illness she bravely lost the Battle of.   She had Married an Immigrant from Africa, so she had a Married African Surname I couldn't ever Pronounce.  *LOL*  She doted on her Only Child.   Her Daughter looks like her Mom, only is much Darker, Collette joked that she'd Married a "Brother Darkness" so that her Kid wouldn't have as much of an Identity Crisis as she'd always had to endure.   I understood that dilemma, since if you look a certain kind of way when you're Mixed Race, you aren't always embraced by any of the Races you're a blend of.   And you get do get tired of folks asking "What are you?", or making incorrect Assumptions and then getting upset that they Assumed incorrectly.   You get more Mature and you don't Care as much, but in Childhood it could be rough.  So Collette and I had many similar Points of References and Life Experiences due to the unique blend of our Families being different and often not Socially acceptable.  

I have a lot of Fond Memories of our long Friendship.  Sadly, most of my long time Lifelong Friends have now either Moved Away or Passed Away and the List keeps growing longer and longer, with fewer of us left now.  Now when I haven't heard from someone in a while I'm almost afraid to look them up Online coz I'm almost always now getting a Memorial Page come up!   LATER:  Well, my Shift went well, it was really busy and somehow I hurt my Back coz it's really sore this Morning, dammit!  I didn't lift anything heavy but you reach for things for Customers and I might have pulled a Muscle?   It's right above my Left Hip that's sore and I put some Cold Therapy Muscle Rub Ointment on it when I got Home, but, it's really fucking sore!   I was filling in for my Friend Yolanda, and working with Co-Workers Susan, Tina, Judith and Kathy, who are Gals I enjoy working with.  We had good coverage coz so many of us where there.   People were Buyers that Evening, which is good to see.  All the Young Men I get along with too were working the Registers.

There's a very Trendy Young Couple who are New Vendors and I just Love their Style, their Aesthetic and their Booths.  They really know what they're doing and their Spaces are distinctive, great Merch.  They have a little Boy whose about 7-8 Years Old and he's Precious, a Talker, was Visiting with everyone and telling them about the Inventory his Parents are Selling... Adorbs!  They had a Medical Cadaver on it's Stand and they'd put a blown Glass Heart inside the Ribcage.  Priced out of my League even tho' we have a 20% Off Sale this Weekend and I am getting myself an Antique White Metal Medical Cabinet with etched Glass Windows, coz it will be down to $67 from an obscure Vendor, cheapest I've ever seen one so I'm going back first thing this Saturday Morning to Score it!   This Vendor only has a cubby sized Space under a Staircase and never had The Good Stuff, but they've Scored a host of Antique Medical Supplies and Old Medicines, Antique Medical Bottles, plus this Cabinet.   You can see by the Crap Merch around the Cabinet that the only Good Stuff is the Old Medical Stuff in the small Space.  *LOL*

So, The Son is gonna go there with me to pick up said Medical Cabinet, it's not heavy but it has the Glass Door and my Back hurts so he doesn't want me trying to lift anything.   So, he'll go to put it in my Truck for me.  Here's a Pix of that Medical Training Cadaver Model, on a rolling White Metal Stand it hangs on, Love it, but not at $250.   I have one but not the Stand for one.  I'm glad that some good Vendors are moving in, but I don't know how they're gonna fare, it's hard to tell, coz even the Best of them sometimes hasn't done as well as the Crap Hawkers there.  It's why I haven't gone Full On Me there, I don't know it would Sell with the Demographic coming in?   And in a Retail Space you've got to pay attention to what that area's Demographic is Buying or not Buying.  Or, even what the average Sale is.   Are people spending a lot on single items or just Buying lots of inexpensive items for a bigger Sale Total?  There, it's the latter, the higher end Merch is a Hard Sell no matter how Primo and well priced it is.  We're not attracting the Heavy Hitters... except for Pokemon People, they'll drop a load of Cash on a single item.  

I've seen a Boxed Set of Pokemon command $800 and the Customer not bat an Eyelash about spending that much on it!!!   Even the Serious Coin People will balk at the more expensive Coins and spend more time agonizing over whether to drop that kind of Cash on One item.   And we do get a lot of Scalpers coming in, we all know it, they Resell what they Buy there coz they have the Client Base who'll pay a Premium more for it.  Most do the Shows in places like Vegas for Reselling.  LATER: We got my Medical Cabinet, $67.50.  So, Color me Happy, Happy, Happy!  It wasn't heavy but it got Hot with being Metal.  *LOL and Ouch*  But we got it Home okay, it barely fit in the Truck Bed coz it's rather tall, it is flat bottom, not on Wheels.   We've got it on the Back Porch for right now Cooling Off a little so it won't be too Hot to handle.  I decided to put it in our Bedroom and re-organize my Jammie Cache' orderly and accessibly.

I had an Antique Bureau that the Drawer Tracts were all busted on so it no longer had function.  I'm keeping some of the Drawers but will use the Carcass of the Bureau as Firewood now.  The Daughter and Danae came back to help me with it all, so we got it done right away and I like how everything turned out.   I haven't yet put some Collections in the Glass Case part fully yet.  I used Vintage Salvaged Milk Crates to organize my Jammie Pants w/T-Shirts I wear all the time around the House and to Sleep in.  They are my Go To for just not being outside of the Home so I have a huge assortment of them.   The Man's little Bedside Table on his side of the Bed is where he puts his Drink at Night so he doesn't have to get up and risk falling.   The stack of Antique Pillows goes on the Bed when it's made, it's not made right now.  *Winks*   But each little Project of Organizing that gets done to make things more Functional makes me Feel Accomplished and on a Positive Trajectory.

It's not that things have to be Perfect, just Functional, pleasing to look at, and more Organized and in Order.  I Hate things to be Messy or Chaotic and Cluttered looking.  So long as there's some Order to it and it's Visually Pleasing I don't Care if there's still Too Much of it frankly.  I'm prone to Muchness and layers of Beauty don't bother me, but Disorder does and I don't like things to look Messy.  I still have to Dust some stuff, we've had so many Dust Storms lately that keeping things Dust Free is practically impossible, so I don't Obsess over it.  I want our Home to be Clean enuf to be Healthy but Dirty enuf to be Happy.  I'm no Domestic Goddess or Suzy Homemaker, never have been, never will be, it's not my Intention to ever be actually.  I doubt on my Deathbed I will be Worried about what I didn't Clean, Wash or Dust.  *LOL and Winks*

The little Drawer in the Middle holds some Costume Jewelry and Heat Sensitive Art Supplies that require a Climate Controlled Space for Storage, and the Cabinet you can't see thru on the Bottom holds Clean Washcloths & Pillowcases.   That Bottom Cabinet has a Shelf in it, so has Two Shelf Areas to put the Washcloths on one Shelf and the Pillowcases on the other Shelf.   The Medical Cabinet fits nicely in that Corner of our Room near the French Doors without obstructing anything but holding and Displaying a lot.   Before, that Corner was a Hot Mess and bothering me a lot coz it looked Messy and had Zero actual Function with that Broken Chest of Drawers there, it just collected Clutter, now it won't and we have much more Room now things are in Order and cleaned out.  I had a Donation Box almost filled of what we took out of the Drawers that I didn't even wanna Keep, or had sat on the Floor in front of the Furniture in a pile of Stuff that didn't have Placement anywhere. 

 

One entire Drawer had clearly become a Catch-All.  And I had been the worst, if only, Offender.  The Drawer didn't even run on it's Tract to be able to Open or Close properly, along with a couple of the other Drawers also broken, so was always ajar and just Stuff got stuffed in there like a Packrat might do.  *LOL*   Now the Family says it looks really Nice and I think it does too.   So, we got a lot done Today that I felt was Productive and my Back wasn't hurting so much once I was being Physically very Active.  Sometimes a Sore Muscle feels better when you keep using it and that's what this Sore Back evidently needed me to do, so it was tiring to do so much, but it eliminated the Back Pain, which had been really Painful too and now has eased up so it's not a Problem anymore, I'll be just Fine.  I'm glad I declined on Working this Weekend's Sale tho', that would have been a Bridge too far.

And boy did I feel like a Bad Gramma, coz I told the whole Family that it was the Young Prince's Birthday Today, which in Real Time is the 8th, and they were confused, and rightly so, his Birthday is the 9th!  Ooops!  I apologized to him coz the whole Family was Wishing him a Happy Birthday on the Wrong Day and it was my fault.  *LOL and Blushes*  He laughed and said it was Okay.  I transferred some Money to his Saving Account but he said he can't access it from New Mexico, only the Checking Account, which, he didn't listen to me and didn't keep a balance in it so they shut it down.   So now he's gotta wait 'til he gets back to Arizona to re-open it and this time keep a balance in it so that it remains Active.  Kids.   They don't always Listen until what you Warned them about NOT doing and has Negative consequences, happens.  *Eye Roll*

 

Anyway, the Antique Mall was very busy as soon as they opened the Doors at 9:00 a.m., so I suspect this 20% Off Sale will go well.  And I need it to coz Sales began Flat for this Pay Period for this 1st Week of it, so the Weekend Sale better bring us up to Speed.   Vendors were bringing lots of Fresh Merch in for the Sale, I did too, we'll see what happens?   I think it's only Items over $25 that get the 20% Off tho', not sure, if so, then it won't be as good as getting 20% Off everything.  Since I didn't know if inexpensive stuff would even be on Sale I bought Three Inexpensive Rosaries I'd had my Eye on coz I didn't wanna risk that they'd get bought.  And Two Vintage Dam Trolls from Denmark, one large Bank one, one small Priest one.  A couple of Tintype Photos, and a small Shenango Diner mini Creamer with Design, that we use for Pancake Syrup for individual place settings when we make everyone Pancakes.

We got a couple DOMINO'S Pizzas, Stuffed Crust People Pleazer and Meatzza, they weren't on Sale anymore but I didn't Care, I wanted those kind.  Princess T and The Son chipped in for the price of them.  And that way we didn't have to heat up the Kitchen cooking when it's 114 Outside and Humid.  So we all felt drained and nobody felt like cooking.  They were so slammed busy that it took 45 Minutes for our Order, but we just waited, they had a full staff at least Today and English Speakers.  And they had it ready before the projected time and thanked me for our Patience.  Hey, if I don't hafta Cook and Heat up my Kitchen in the Summertime I don't mind waiting a bit.  *Smiles*  Today has gone so well that this was a nice ending to it actually, so we felt very Chill that the Weekend was going nicely.  The Man has been happily watching some Movies, a switch from his usual Rerun Episodes of NCIS, Homestead Rescue or the Food Network.  He's watching some of the "Predator" Movies and hasn't been in a great Mood, so we just leave him be when he's easily agitated by anything or everything and everyone.  Some Days are like that for him.  Whaddya gonna do?  Shrugs.

The Son gets Emotional about his Dad's Dementia Moods, it Wrecks him Emotionally to see his Dad be unable to have good Relationships now.  I remind him it's not Personal, it's the Disease progression and symptoms.   He instantly Yells a lot Angrily if you say anything at all to him, instead of having a regular Normal response to anyone saying anything to him.  I have to remind him to use his Inside Voice Volume and Talk to everyone with Civility and Kindness, to be Nice on Purpose.  He gets very defensive in response to that chastisement but I don't let him get away with being Unlovely without consequences.   So he is like a Kid that just got scolded for doing something they shouldn't that isn't Socially appropriate or tolerable.   He'll sulk for a while, but Calm Down and be less agitated or aggressive.   This is why I don't have him out in Public as much anymore, I don't know he won't get like that with Strangers, you never know now if he can Mood Regulate Appropriately all of the time, or even some of the time?   And not become Hostile.

The Daughter and her Friend Danae have spent all Week cleaning some Old Lady's Home and Property that is a Hoarder and in Cognitive Decline.  She has very nice things but hasn't taken Care of any of it, mebbe even can't.  So it was really bad and not everything held up to the neglect and just being Hoarded.   She gave The Daughter some nice China items to Sell or Keep.  China is a tough Sell at the Antique Mall, but it is Quality Bavarian Hand Painted Fine China mostly and some unusual pieces, so, didn't cost her anything but helping the Old Lady out and she got Paid too, so, Win-Win.  She likes helping Old People out and so does Danae.  So, they were excited to show me what the Old Lady gave them, some pieces were so unique I'd never seen anything like it so will have to Google Lens to even have any idea of Selling Price Point or Value.  The Daughter set to Mopping my Floors, Sweeping and doing some Laundry while she's here.  So everything smells like Pine Sol and Fabuloso {the Purple Scent, which is Light Lavender and we like a lot}.  *Ha ha ha*

Anyway, so, the Day has gone quite well, with the exception of The Man giving everyone Side Eye and Stink Eye for no apparent reason.  No telling what's going thru his poor Brain anymore really, so I just keep him Comfortable and Feeling Safe and Secure, which is Calming to him, and to keep his Routine in place, also very Helpful.   Like I said in a previous Post, sometimes I get irritated at him and his Behavior if I'm particularly Tired and Overwhelmed, but I do try to be Mindful that he mostly can't Help how he's becoming.   Getting to balance what he can still do and be like with what he can't is trial and error for the most part and we Wing It constantly coz nobody in the Medical Profession is the least bit Helpful at assisting Families with Management of this kind of Extreme Caregiving.  You are doing it all on The Fly with no real Direction except what Google can give you suggestions of, so I'm Dr. Googling shit about Dementia now all the damned time.  To see what's Normal for the progression of the Disease and what's probably not.

Yeah, I went thru it with my Mom, but she lived Independently for much of it and I did her Caregiving from our separate Homes until she reached the point she could no longer live Independently.  And until I could get funded Placement for her arrangement, which was like Winning the fucking Lottery!!!   That's about how good your chances are if you can't Fund Long Term Care for a Loved One, nobody Cares and they don't just Qualify due to dire or desperate Need of Long Term Care.   We literally had to liquidate assets for each Parent before they even marginally Qualified for ANY Long Term Care beyond 21 Days Medicare only allows, and only in select Facilities that take Medicare Residents or Veterans.  A lot of the Faith Based Non-Profits really only take folks who can Buy-In, they don't take the Poor.  

I doubt you'd find any Poor among the Residents in any of them frankly.  Or people of Color for that matter.  Every higher quality Facility I Toured had only the more well off White Residents.   The only Lower Income or folks of Color were the Staff at those Facilities from my Observations.  Or Retired Military Officers, not Enlisted Military Retirees and Veterans.   One would assume the Faith Based Non-Profits would have a fair share of Charity Cases among their Residents to be truly all about The Lord's Work... Love of Jesus in Action and all that... but... Yeah, No.   If you can't Afford to be there, you will NOT be there.   And when they start Deporting all of the Immigrants that provide most of the Staffing at all of these Facilities, don't expect Americans to vie for those Thankless Positions to Care for our most Vulnerable and Elderly.   

At the Facilities here in Arizona and in Cali where my Brother lives, the majority of the Staff are Immigrants from other Countries, not Americans.  Stats say it's around 30% Nationwide, I doubt that to be accurate frankly.  Not even only 30% of our Doctors, Specialists and Nurses are Americans anymore.  So, there would be a huge Void in Medical Care, and our Food Chain Industries alone, if they didn't appreciate how much Service in all Industries the Immigrant Populations actually perform and provide our Country.  I for one am Thankful, so I get Frosty when someone insinuates Immigrants are only doing Negative things to America and contributing nothing of importance.  You'd have to be "New" and don't get out much to not Observe otherwise how false those claims are.  I'm weary of the Scapegoating, Racism, and Xenophobia that has escalated and is out of control now.  It's Ugly and Cruelty coupled with complete disregard for Humanity and the Sanctity of Life, seems to be the Point.

Same folks who pretend to be so "Pro Life" might claim to be all about The Children, so long as it's still a Fetus and requires nothing of them, but not once it's Born, and not for the next 18 Years of it being a Child with Needs.  And not in Support of the Families Raising said Children they pretend they Cared so much about BEFORE they were Born.  This Government is cutting Funding for all Social Services and Education for The Children, and so many "Pro Lifer" types seem perfectly Fine Supporting that, if it saves them a Buck.  So, tell me, how is that "Pro Life" at all, really?  We used to do Ministry and Volunteer Work for "Crisis Nursery" and all those Folks that would spend Countless Hours Picketing Abortion Clinics, one would think would be fertile ground to get Volunteers for Abused and Neglected Children already Born, Right?  

Yeah, NO, it was not, never got a Single fucking Volunteer out of the "Right To Lifer" Crowd.  Coz then it would require them Investing something in an actual Child already Born.  And one in desperate Need or in Crisis, that they could Walk The Walk of what they profess to Believe and Spout Off about in Talk only, and walking around with Signs.  They wanna force the Women to bear these Children that they themselves could give a fuck about once it's Born, coz they wouldn't Help that Mother or that Child, Truth be told.  They'd probably be the loudest at vilifying the Recipients of any Social Services being needed and received by those Families that didn't chose Abortion.  Now, don't get me Wrong, I Wish no Child would ever be Aborted.  I am Pro Life but I'm also Pro Choice, they're not Mutually Exclusive.   Becoz it's not MY difficult decision to ever make for someone else and their Situation, Circumstances, or the next 18 Years it would require to Raise said Child for whoever will end up doing it and providing everything that Child will require until it's Grown.  

I know how little Help I got in the Raising of Two of our Grandchildren that required alternative Parenting due to their set of Circumstances.  It's not like any Pro Lifers ever stepped up to say, oh, if you're not Qualifying for Services Needed, what can we do to be of Help?  Yeah, that's not happening.  I know many Custodial Grandparents and Kinship Placement Families, I even know some Custodial Great-Grandparents.  Not once has any of them said they got any more Help than we did, so I didn't feel Singled Out at all, it's just how it is.  What is parsed out sparingly, you really have to go Hard to try to Qualify for and receive.  It's like when someone goes Missing, depending on the Demographic of who goes Missing, we all know which Cases get the most Attention and the coverage of the Media and Society. 

 Think Gabby Petito as an Example, what did she LOOK like?  Yeah, that would be the Demographic getting the most Attention and coverage, the most Interest of Media Coverage and Society giving a shit.  We have a Human Value System in America... and either you Rate as a Human Being... or you fucking don't.  And it's not becoz you're not of the Human Species.  And any Life shouldn't be any less or more Precious than another.  And we're going backwards and devolving in this Country and watching it go in that direction is deeply disturbing.  Especially how many are on Board and want it going in that disgusting and shameful direction.  Yet, will profess to be "Good" People.  Or someone will try to convince me they are... but, frankly, there's nothing "Good" about it. Rant Over... now I Feel a bit less Emotionally Raw and Militantly Ranty... and just saying out loud what some folks would prefer not be said at all, as if somehow that makes it not so Real and in their Face to be confronted with the Reality of.    I will always choose making Good Trouble over Silence about Injustices and being on the Side of or in Support of the Oppressors.  

*******

Dawn... The Bohemian