Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Mixed Feelings

 via: VINTAGE ENVY Creations

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Well, what I was trying to do fell thru... I have mixed feelings... disappointment and yet relief... the Deal would have been Sweet if things had Worked Out... but at least I don't have to Move now.




Wanting to do something and being able to do something can sometimes be Worlds apart.  It's apparently not meant to be and my acceptance of that was better than I'd expected actually.




Lately acceptance of things, even with disappointment or resignation, has been okay, which I suppose is Good.   I remain guardedly Optimistic regardless of outcomes lately, choosing Positive Energy is preferable to succumbing to Negative Energy.




I am not at all prepared for Easter or getting The G-Kid Force's Baskets, Egg Hunt and such done and this is one of the first years I haven't even brought out any Easter Decor to create a few vignettes around the house.   Easter is Sunday... time is just warping by... leaving me far behind.




At the Historic Homestead I always Decorated for the Holidays and was extremely proactive in participating in all of them.   Here I find I just haven't and seem to lose track of my Days... my Weeks... my Months... it blends into it's monotony... it's daily existence.




I think I might have Lived more fully then, compared to now, I'm just not Sure?  It felt fuller anyway, not so empty and devoid of... everything.   There is a void and I'm not sure how to fill it actually.




When I got Home from Work Tonight, The Man said he was Sorry we didn't get the shot at The Historic Ice House... long Story... which doesn't warrant a Post now to even explain.   I told him I was disappointed, but also relieved I didn't have the Anxiety of staging this place for a Listing, trying to keep it clean for Viewings or contemplating another Epic Move to accomplish Solo, I don't think I have any of that in me?




I don't even have White Eggs yet to dye for Easter with the Kids!  That puts everything in perspective right there my Friends!!!  *LOL*   He confided that The Young Prince had told him, after hearing the disappointing News, that he doubted Gramma had another Move left in her anyway, so perhaps it's just as well?  He could be right...




He's a pretty observant Kid, he sees my struggle to maintain Order out of the Chaos that reigns around here most days.   There are baskets of Princess T's Laundry down the Hallway leading to the Laundry Room... at least she got it off of her Bedroom Floor and into the Baskets... that's Progress around here!  Baskets... must dig out the Easter Baskets...




I'm bringing the Hoard of TV Trays back downstairs, that have migrated to my Room, is what The Young Prince said to me when he realized I was Home from Work.  He said that voluntarily so that I didn't have to say it when I saw no Trays down here again for anyone else to use.   His Guilty conscience was clearly getting the best of him?  *Smiles*  Perhaps he thought I was too distraught about the Ice House News to risk winding me up, I dunno?




I could now only just Imagine trying to field a Call from my Realtor about Showing this Home on short notice and having dirty clothing scattered all over the floor of her Room and TV Trays scattered all over the floor of his Room.  Yes, it is Good that does not now have to actually happen, I'm Honestly relieved!  *LMAO*




Besides, my messes are just about as epic lately, as I'm fiercely Purging possessions from the Hoarded Garages to price and get into the Antique Mall. And unpacking what has taken three plus years to get around to unpacking since the last Epic Move!  *Le Sigh*  Perpetuating that would be the very definition of Insanity!   Indefinitely packing and unpacking... simultaneously in fact...




I'm Wondering if the Egg Dyes I did find while cleaning and organizing cabinetry will adequately dye Brown Eggs?   My Mind wanders like that, flitting from subject to subject and unable to focus upon any one thing no matter how important.   Adult ADHD ain't no Joke... but at least my Hyperactivity part of that is waning.




I at least know where all my Ostrich Eggs are so I guess I could unceremoniously plop them around existing vignettes in an Easterly Fashion... Easter On The Fly?  *Winks*   I did buy Dollar Store Candies to stuff into Plastic Eggs for an impromptu Egg Hunt, Yay Me!!!




Princess T informed me this would be her last Year of Egg Hunting, since she transitions this September from Tween to full blown Teen and is putting away such Childish things apparently.   *LOL*   Good, now you're blossoming into full blown Womanhood perhaps you could initiate that Laundry of yours in a Basket Trail down my Hallway?!  *Winks*




And in case you were Wondering, NO, I did NOT whip myself up into a delayed Easter Decorating frenzy for these Post Images, they're rehashed from Easters Past.  *Bwahahahahaha!!!*   I couldn't even tell you where Carnival Kitsch Accordion playing Bunny is stashed if you paid me a million bucks to!?




Besides, I'm pretty certain that nobody around here gives a damn anyway whether or not I've Decorated for any Holiday or notices that I didn't get around to it.   So yeah, most Years I've done it more for my own self-gratification I suppose.   *Ha ha ha*




In fact, I'd be confident in laying Odds that nobody will be heard saying OMG Gramma forgot to Decorate for Easter, what shall we do?!?  *Bwahahaha!*  Though Princess T did pitch a hissy fit that I forgot Tomatoes for Street Taco Night... and after I went out and specifically bought some she ate Top Ramen instead!   *No Comment!*




Nobody really ate Dinner while you were at Work is what The Man told me when I got Home from Work... I really don't Care... I'd been too tired to prep the Taco Meat before leaving for Work so that was really likely Why?!  *Ha ha ha*  Without a Spotter The Man isn't allowed to use the Stove anyway lest he wander off and forget he's Cooking!   I'm sure The Force ate something inappropriately not at all nutritious in lieu of of fixing Street Tacos.  *LOL*




The Young Prince informed me just before he retired for Bed that Facebook is being investigated by the FBI because they've likely Sold my Profile and everybody else's to God knows Who... Swell.   Like my freakin' Profile is such a Valuable piece of information at this stage.  My Commodity Value is likely tilting towards trading at a negative price!   *Smiles*



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Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

3 comments:

  1. It's okay to let these things go when your heart isn't in it. However, the photos on this page scream Easter, and I thank you for that. I'm sorry that the new adventure fell through.

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  2. Thinking of you but relieved with you!

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  3. So many things to feel, mourn, and understand. Maybe one of them the growing up of the G-Force. Maybe another the end of one period of your life... which, of course, is the entering of another... which sounds graced with the Gift of Acceptance.
    Seems both you and the G-Force are shifting... and that's challenging and complicated to do.

    On a totally different note... I love natural dyes on brown eggs... so subtle and beautiful. Why not wrap some brown eggs in old lace, pop a rubber band on them... and soak in red onion peels and hot water with a little vinegar?

    I used to decorate for every holiday and season, too... but now I find myself thinking, on reading your post... "Wait! Is Easter THIS Sunday?! I sort of hadn't realized."

    We're heading off on Monday to look at colleges for my daughter. My mind and heart are on transformations and changes... as it sounds, are yours.

    Spring and Fall are both good reminders of transformation... and as we know.... they tend to blow both hot and cold. Weather more unpredictable. Changes sometimes happen in sudden shifts. Shoots come up and flowers open. Leaves blow off trees in a storm and branches fall. It all happens seemingly or actually overnight sometimes.

    So it is with us humans...

    I wish you insight, peace and wisdom as we move fully into Spring... and celebrate the holidays of Nowruz, Passover, and Easter.

    May you find yourself in just the right place with just the right view to see the meaning in the big picture and the beauty in the detail.

    ZC

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A life touched by God always ends in touching others. - Erwin McManus

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