Wednesday, January 3, 2018

The Death Of Fantasies

I freely confess that I'm prone to Fantasies of Life... not Real Life... but the Imaginings of what it will be like, which of coarse are rarely how they actually ARE and so the Death of Fantasies is bound to happen sooner than later as Real Life plays out!  So, I always start every New Year with this exaggerated Fantasy that it will begin Wonderfully, Idyllic and free of the annoying Realities the year before it challenged us with or even new annoyances and challenges.  I know... I know... but it's MY Fantasy and I always run with it at the stroke of Midnight, it's like I'm some kind of Hopeless Optimist that never learns!   And so I'll chase after and retain my Joy regardless of the shitstorm Life usually becomes on the turn of a dime and continue to be prone to Fantasies of Life anyway.

At this juncture of the Blog Post I HAVE to insert this Delightful image of my Brother in a moment of having a pure belly laugh, with the caption his Professional Photographer Friend made for it of:  He is just ecstatic when his lens gets fondled.   *LMAO*  I just Love it and it's probably my all time Favorite pix ever taken of my Brother because you'd never know the Real Life Crisis he's going thru perpetually health-wise by the Pure Joy he intentionally lives out daily.  Frankly, at the stroke of Midnight if I were to have told my Lil Bro' my exaggerated Fantasy Imaginings of 2018, I'm pretty sure he would have laughed just this hard again... because in hindsight it IS pretty damned hilarious in a Gallow's Humor kinda way.

Because it didn't take more than about the day AFTER New Year's Day for the Fantasy to Die quite horribly!   With The Man waking me up WAY too early, by about 7:30 a.m., on a day I'll have to Work late, having to tell me how badly the Morning had started before the rest of us had even managed to wake up!  Thankfully he had been up early to answer the rude pounding on the door at such a ridiculous hour... which was somewhere between 6:00-7:00 A.M., and was so loud it rudely even awoke The Young Prince sleeping Upstairs in his Soundproof Mother-In-Law Suite!!!  Yeah, it was a good thing The Man answered the door coz I'd of surely lost my shit at that hour and with what then transpired! *LOL*

Prepare for the agonizing Death Throes of my exaggerated Fantasy of a Drama Free Peaceful 2018!   There stands one of our uptight pretentious Subdivision Hell Neighbors!  *Le Sigh*  You know, the types that complain about everything and anything and who aren't so inclined to Social Graces or basic considerations or civility... like NOT angrily beating on a Neighbors door before most people are even awake... because apparently it's all about them all of the time!  And that seems to encompass a great many of these people in the more affluent burbs... it's like some kind of Success induced Zombie Apocalypse that plagues them!?!  We just try not to get infected by the toxic plague of whatever ails them by limiting our exposure to them... and without wanting to kill any of them... which takes much restraint!  *Bwahahahahaha!*   

Okay, so rude dude now proceeds to yell very loudly in complaint about our fat old Cat Miss Priss... {Note: Being Louder or Angrier does not invite anyone to see your point of view...} and tries to convince The Man that she's pissing on the Oranges growing on his Trees in his back yard!  WTF?!?  Yeah, Stop and just try to Visualize that for a moment will you... especially a very old fixed Female Cat... or ANY Cat for that matter, pissing UP and THAT HIGH!  *LMAO*  Okay, so he's very angry, yelling loudly and clearly he's Serious about his own Fantasy accusations... and let's face it, once the conversation takes that much of a turn for Crazy, even my Brain Damaged hubby realizes there is little Hope of rationalizing with this individual!   But he tries to, Calmly and making much more sense, despite his Brain Injury, than this lunatic standing at our front door being confrontational, hostile and unlovely!

The Young Prince by now is hanging out his Upstairs Suite Window watching The Show below.  With phone in hand ready to Dial 911 should it escalate to the point where his Grandpa flips out, loses his shit on rude dude and goes Rambo.  Because rude dude clearly thinks he's bigger and more intimidating to an allegedly feeble Old Disabled Man standing before him... and doesn't realize my Old Man's considerable Special Forces Skills, should he suddenly have a serious PTSD Episode and feel threatened enough to Need to defend himself and kill or really hurt the guy!   The Young Prince was nervous, should he just call the Police now while Grandpa is still very Calm and trying to be Civil to this freaking out individual causing a scene at our front door?

We're very Peaceful People and try very hard to get along with everyone and treat others how we Wish to be treated... sometimes that's difficult if the others are hostile or incredibly unlovely in their interactions and general State of Being.  This Neighbor had initially seemed like NOT one of the Problem ones... he does Bar-B-Q for a living, turns out he's been feeding Miss Priss the scraps, thus enticing her to feel Welcome and pampered on visits to his property to receive luscious treats!!!  *WTF!*  What animal wouldn't then head straight for this dude's back yard whenever he fires the commercial Bar-B-Q grills up, given the intoxicating reward of free treats, his Bar-B-Q is damned good!!!  Let's not even get into Creating your own Problem and then blaming others for it once you decide it's now a Problem you want everyone else to fix!

He demands we 'Control' our Cat... he threatens Animal Control... Litigation... blah blah blah... The Man begins to explain the Law about Felines but he doesn't want to listen... the dude's on his rampage.   So now we've got the dilemma of a Working Cat who is Old and lived all of her Life Outdoors, being possibly harmed by this individual... since we don't trust him one iota given how Crazy his dialogue was!  It took us three years to train her to come inside for the Night and sleep with her Human so she wouldn't get picked off at New House by the Evening Predators so prolific in this Rural area so close to pristine Desert!  I went to every Pet Warehouse and there are no Cat enclosures available... and the ones online would never be allowed by our incredibly anal HOA, they are pretty hideous and not at all aesthetically pleasing, not to mention stupid EXPENSIVE!

It doesn't help that rude dude's back yard is nothing but loose dirt and has been for years... so it's like one big litter box to every Cat in the area.  Miss Priss has a litter box and is well fed, she's also so old and fat that she won't bother to jump over a 6 foot wall unless it's got a good reward, which he clearly gave her the incentive by feeding her, we told him to Stop doing that immediately.  We don't want to Risk him trying to Poison her now he's gained her Trust with regular feedings before.  There are also numerous Male Cats in our Neighborhood who visit our yard regularly to fight with her and steal her kibbles, so I'm pretty sure they're visiting his yard too so our Cat is likely not his biggest nor only Problem to Solve.  The time he swears Miss Priss is over there pissing on Oranges in the Tree daily happens to be so early she's still inside sleeping with Princess T in fact!  He didn't want to hear her exonerated as being The One... regardless of Logical Alibi to the contrary.   We Wonder how many other Neighbors he rudely awoke that Morning, the day after New Year's Day with similar illogical rants?!?

  The Man suggested he do what we do for unwanted Feline visitors, get a spray bottle of harmless water, they usually quit going where they're regularly Unwelcome and Kindly and Humanely discouraged with Consistency.   We know that a lot of people are neither Kind nor Humane, let alone Consistent... so Princess T was in tears about the incident, which woke her up too!   She Loves her Miss Priss, she's a Good Cat and sleeps most of her days away sunning on our back Patio... I hardly doubt she'd be fixated on the Circus Contortionist Acrobatics of trying to piss up Orange Trees anyway, just to soil his Oranges so he can't eat them.  *LOL, yes, he said that!*   The Man woke me up after it was all over and done with... he was Glad I'd slept thru it so I didn't go Postal... I Seriously doubt I could have held my shit like he did, I was very Proud of him in fact.  He handled it with Dignity, maintaining his Calm and much Grace extended towards rude dude, who wasn't being the least bit Respectful or Sane Solution oriented. 

  Pretty Sad really when a Brain Damaged Man is making more sense than you... Yes, he knows my Husband has TBI and is a Disabled Veteran, that makes the out of Control Confrontation all the more bullyish and unacceptable IMO to provoke and threaten him like that.  But at least nobody had to get arrested and dragged off my Front Courtyard the day after New Year's in handcuffs or Killed at our front door, that would not have been Good.  *Winks*  The Death of my Fantasy was enough Thank You very much only barely over one day into my New Year!  *Le Sigh*  It's why I'm putting rude dude Neighbor on Blast here in The Land of Blog... Hopefully Saner interactions will prevail in the Future... but I'm only Guardedly Optimistic given the track record of uptight pretentious types in this Neighborhood totally lacking in Social Graces or mutual basic Consideration for people!   And Miss Priss, will you refrain from pissing UP the Neighbor's Orange Trees Please?!  *Bwahahahahahaa!  I don't Care who you are, that Visual is just as Outrageous as it is Hilarious and totally Insane!*  Even she seems to be saying, "What the Hell are you talking about Crazy Human?!"

And in True Bohemian Style we'll choose to remain Zen in our Existence and State of Being regardless of the lack thereof all around us... because I do Believe Good Karma will be ours in 2018 if that's what we put out there into the World my Friends.   And The Man is now coming over to my side of wanting to Move out of Subdivision Hell.  *Yay!*  To Plan out a more Peaceful and less Controlled Life somewhere devoid of HOA's, which I still Believe are the devil in disguise and I NEVER want to live with enduring another one!  And petty Neighbors in very close proximity to have to Deal with constantly if they have Issues beyond our Control or even beyond the levels of our Patience!  *Smiles*  Yes, Villa Boheme' is a Gorgeous Dream House... but if the HOA and Neighbors make it Nightmarish it spoils the ability to even Enjoy it properly and in Peace or Harmony as we Wish to!   And that's just sometimes how Real Life plays out and Fantasies are put to Death.  You CAN be Living The Dream AND Living The Nightmare at the same time you see.

And frankly we'll choose Peace and Harmony over Luxury Living any day, it's a Richer Life to have those Elements opposed to Dealing with petty pretentious sorts and their ridiculously exaggerated Drama and strife inducing behaviors.   I'm rather at saturation point with it all after three years, it's just not how I choose to Live or want to expose my Family to or have any of us have to endure.   To say that living in The Hood was actually preferable would be an understatement, I Miss my Good, Kind Neighbors and close knit Community every day.  I sorely regret having to give up my Beloved Old Homestead in order to be allowed to Adopt my Grandchildren and pay off huge Medical and Debts incurred by The Man's catastrophic accident.   Sometimes you don't know what you had until it's Gone... tho' this Luxury Home is visually Impressive, it can't hold a candle to living in a place you Love, around people you Like, at Peace in your Soul, however Humble... or even considered substandard by Social opinion.

And that's how our New Year began... so it can Hopefully only get Better from here on out!?!????!  Because I really do want to retain a semblance of The Fantasy I'm prone to of the exaggeration that 2018 will be Wonderful, Idyllic and free from the annoying Realities that 2017 seemed plagued with.  Yes, I'm a Hopeless Optimist like that and prefer to view my World thru my Rose Colored Glasses most of the time, it's just Prettier and Dreamier that way.  And you just can't give up on your Dreams my Friends!   No matter whose Orange Trees Oranges way up there are allegedly being pissed upon!??!??!?  *Winks*


Happy New Year from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian


  1. Oh no! What an experience! Unreal! Is there anyplace free from problems? We are about as close to it as possible on our 10 acres in the country on a gravel road

    1. 10 Acres in the Country is beginning to sound Idyllic to The Man and I... ha ha ha... I Need to be near the City, but Dealing with petty grievances and senses of entitlement of neighbors is making me rethink living with other people nearby. We got so spoiled on our old Homestead's Acreage and having Wonderful neighbors for so many years. The Young Prince even said it's too bad we couldn't talk the guy who bought it and is restoring it into selling it back to us. *LOL*

  2. Um, we lived in a townhouse development for seven years. Honestly, some people just have issues with 'life' and living. So glad the Man...had the where with all, to not go crazy with this guy. Said neighbor, should read this...and then decide what a fool he was. Cat's no matter how skilled, don't pee UP?

    I found it interesting you chose the glass---(fragile) sculptures but also---dangerously threatening at times...saying---'don't break may be sorry.'

    Point and analogy not missed here. And, some people are simply not human.

    1. I guess the biggest shock was this is a neighbor who initially we never thought would be problematic at all. We have spoken, met most of their Family, bought from their business... when you meet someone and don't initially get any vibe they will suddenly behave very inappropriately or hostile it is perhaps just more alarming to me really... more unexpected. I feel, after 3 years, we don't really 'know' any of these people around here and sometimes that is unsettling because you're continuously then living around complete 'Strangers' no matter how long you co-exist in close proximity with them in an alleged 'community'. Yes, I'm sure there are deeper 'Issues' than we can ever fathom... just Hoping the Drama ends with the one incident!?

  3. It can happen in all sorts of neighborhoods with all sorts of people. I live in a neighborhood that may be like your old one. I lost the friendship of a neighbor over a cat - our cat, lol. Because she was a friend and I knew her situation, etc., I can surmise that various things triggered her moving over into... emotional struggles. I want to be cautious in how I phrase things in this public setting even tho' I don't use my "real" name. It was a horrible experience - maybe even especially horrible because we were once friends.

    I think in general, "modern" US culture doesn't value neighborliness as it once did. I grew up with the neighborly way of doing things. Not many live in that way now - for a number of reasons, including, I think, lack of time. It takes time - and effort and willingness - to maintain relationships of any kind, even the less intimate ones. I also that women generally have more relational skills than men and are very good at creating and maintaining community. Many women are now very busy working - which is fine - I work, too! But this changed things in neighborhoods. Oftentimes, a really functioning neighborhood is anchored by one or two people, often women but not always, who are around a fair amount of the time and have generosity of heart. They could be young or old but they value community and work to establish it.

    Believe it or not, my neighbor and former friend used to be one of those people. That's why I know something happened - because she's mostly not that way anymore with anyone on the block. Definitely not with us.

    Now she calls the police on the old people who come around picking up cans out of the recycling bin. So sad. I set mine out in a box so the the can pickeruppers don't have to dig thru the bin for them. Why not? Why not do that tiny thing that makes someone's life easier? That person is a human being. A human being who might even save your life one day! Or not. Who knows. But they are human and for that reason, worthy of basic respect.

    I have tried to do a few good deeds for my former friend and long-time neighbor - such as when she left her hose on and yard was flooding very badly. It didn't make a difference. She has written me off.

    The cat that started it all is now gone. Buried under the old pear tree in the back. I try to advise our new cats to stay out of her yard. Do they listen?

    Of course not. Cats are here to teach us many things - including lessons about territory. They - not us - decide what their boundaries are. We are often just like them - but don't recognize this in ourselves.

    I hope things ease up with your neighbor - and I hope you have the opportunity this year to get to know some of your neighbors. Maybe they are shy and don't know how to be a neighbor. It's possible.

    We're all in this adventure together - families, neighborhoods, countries, etc.

    Sometimes it is overwhelming.. THIS person is in my family, neighborhood, workspace, country? I have to deal with THIS person? Lol... yeah.... sometimes we do have to... as you well know!

    And that's why it's good to take our coffee or tea breaks and enjoy a bit of beauty and entertainment and creativity. It restores our spirit so we can back into the messy business of life... with all these challenging people, animals, etc.!

    Happy New Year! ZC


A life touched by God always ends in touching others. - Erwin McManus

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars. - Og Mandino (1923-1996)

For creativity to flourish one should try to look at everything as though it were being seen for the first or the last time. - Quote from "A Thousand Paths To Creativity" by David Baird

Is what I'm about to say an improvement on silence? ~ Galen Pearl