Sunday, November 20, 2016

Sweet Salvage ~ Comfort & Joy ~ Part IV



So, we went back to SWEET SALVAGE with a brand new Memory Card in the Camera on Saturday... so I can now Share a wealth of Inspirational Imagery and extend my Posts.  *Smiles*




My Friend Cyndie's Antique Reliquary Necklace Creations just take my breath away!  Had I been on my own Christmas buying quest for what I'd want under the Tree this year, these two Stunning Necklaces would have come Home with me!  *Swoon*




The Young Prince joined me since he and I were having a Quality Time day out together.  If I only have one Grandchild in tow it's always an Enjoyable Fun time and we were out from Sunup to Sundown doing the Town.  Coming back on the third day of the Event also gives us time to visit with our Sweet Friends since it's not as crowded and intense as Opening Day.




Since both of the G-Kid Force suffer from Anxiety and Panic Attacks they just don't handle intensely crowded situations well enough to ever bring them on an Opening Day to any Event.   But my Friends at Sweet know we'll be back, with one or both of The Force in tow by the Weekend when it's Calmer.  He just Adores my Sweet Friends and looks forward to visiting with them all.  It's one of the few times he isn't as Camera Shy and I can get some good pixs of him without it being under Protest because we're having such Fun.  *LOL*




He had me all to himself all day and so we were having a Big Time together. He's at that Age now where he's Fun to hang out with and we have a lot of laughs and deep conversations as well.  His Little Sister had been the Beast Princess that Morning so she didn't want to go with us and opted to stay Home with Grandpa.  Thankfully she behaved for him and had some Friends over so it all worked out well for us all!  *Whew!*




Lets face it, the Tween Years can be quite the turbulent time of Parenting a Child, especially a Female Child!  My personal experience has been that raising a Male Child can be rough in the earlier years since Boys can get into so much mischief, and be rough and tumble around the house so watch out for your fragile stuff!  But the Tween years and up to Adulthood can be rougher with the Girls... that hormone switch being turned on can be a Wild Ride with the wide range of Emotions kicking in at warp speed!  *Arghhh!*




With this Child she Loves you, she Hates you, she Loves to Hate you, she Hates to Love you... so you can be her best Friend and her worst Enemy at any given time of the day... it's exhausting to keep up with what ground you're standing on with that Child?!?   Originally she was going with her Brother and I... she even got dressed and we were almost out the door as a Family Unit.  ALMOST!




There was even Peace On Earth here at New Villa Boheme' that Morning so I was Encouraged it wasn't going to be a rough day with her.  But... we know that can turn on a dime... and it did... just a matter of what might be the Trigger?  And it can be the most random thing ever, you just never know and it's totally unpredictable what might set her off?!?

  


She was being Angelic and so we naively thought it would be a Good Day to invite her to join us.   Silly us!   The Man had wanted to stay Home and put up the Christmas Tree for us, we'd brought the box into the house from Storage and there it sat, next to his Recliner.  So she asked how we were going to decorate it this year and I innocently answered the question ALL WRONG apparently!  Well, we're going to decorate it this year with Architectural Salvage Art Deco Doorplates and Vintage Family Photos mostly... uh oh...




Lord Baby Jesus here it comes... NOOOOOOOOOO!!!  Her face gets contorted and Red and she becomes very animated, but not in a Good way!   Why can't we have a NORMAL Tree she wails?!?!!   To which The Young Prince retorts, you ARE part of THIS Family aren't you, when have we EVER had a NORMAL Tree?!?  *Bwahahaha, well, True that!*




Lord Baby Jesus Help us... now she wants us to be NORMAL!  Okay, so I'm pretty sure our Abnormality doesn't REALLY bother her one iota except when mebbe some other Kids from Non-Addams-Family Type Families probably mention it... so I'm pretty sure that's what might have happened?   At Halloween it's preferred you be the Weird and Wonderful Family and everybody digs it so that's Cool when you're Eleven... but Christmas decor apparently has to be NORMAL???!??!  *Smiles*




I didn't even try to defend our Abnormality while she was in Full Blown Freak Out about Tree Decor and now unwilling to go with us because apparently we're such Freaks of Nature!   *LOL*  Hey, with a Tween you're usually SOMETHING they perceive as Negative... you're Lame... you don't Understand... you're Embarrassing... out of Touch with what's Cool... you still say the Word Cool... they don't wanna be seen with you... whatever...   *Smiles*




I had already decided that once we got back Home and she was Calmer, we could discuss her Decorating the Tabletop Tree in that room however she perceived Normal to be?!?   Since clearly WE wouldn't even know what Normal looks like, right?!?  Weirdos that we are... *Winks*   And The Young Prince was ushering me hastily and stealthily out the front door, quietly and without fanfare before she changed her Mind again!  He even had his shoes in his hand so he'd be stealthier exiting Stage Left in his Socks!!!  And shushing me lest I make the least bit of noise... and yelling DRIVE! to me once that key turned in the ignition!!!!!!!  *Bwahahahaha!*  




 The Man later told me she came back from her Rant of stomping Upstairs slightly later and asked if we'd snuck out without her?  He claimed we didn't sneak, with a straight face even he said this *LOL*... and reminded her she'd told us she didn't want to go.  Oh yeah, she responded... I didn't wanna go, huh... and then went Calmly into the Library here to get on the Computer and didn't throw any more Fuss whatsoever... Yeah, the Storm can blow over just that fast, like it never happened!  *Insert Twilight Zone Music*




Now, maybe some of you have Female Children, or any Child, who aren't so Volatile so you have no Idea how much Chaos can go down in the blink of an Eye and spiral out of control completely in a Heartbeat.   Maybe if you've never dealt with a Child unable to regulate Emotion appropriately or is afflicted with Mental Health Disorders you would presume to think you know how you'd handle this differently with some sort of disciplinary measure that would actually Work?  I however have had years of experience and have learned to choose my battles wisely... to maintain my own measure of Sanity and not escalate a Situation.




And if you ever wanna have a Good Day in your Lifetime if you have Loved Ones with Mental Illness and Mood Disorder, you learn that attempting to Control situations that go Absurdly Mental and you really don't have much, if any, Control over... is futile and will ensure a Bad Day beyond your Wildest Nightmares!  I wanna be Living The Dream my Friends, not extending The Nightmare of Mental Episodes... so our Response has been fine tuned over the years to do what de-escalates and diffuses things best and most effectively!




If you were to be a harsh disciplinarian and figure that punishing a Child who is Not Well for having their symptoms of a diagnosed Disability in hopes that maybe then they wouldn't have them... I couldn't be in Agreement with that Method or Assessment.  I've seen that play out in Families that way actually... and heard tragic Testimonies of Disabled individuals of them being treated that way when their Loved Ones couldn't Cope in Positive ways with their Disability... it tends to be a complete disaster because punishing anyone for being Disabled is just Cruel and tends to totally backfire and be destructive every way imaginable.




Besides, the Relationship I Share with our SMI Children, be they still Children or Adults now, is too Precious to me, I Love them all Unconditionally.  The ones who are Well and those who are Disabled... a Disability doesn't Define them and you don't Love a Disabled Loved One less just because that Relationship may be more Complex.  And Trust and Believe it can become very Complicated!




  I know that even tho' we Endure the Bad Days, the Good Days will also come and we'll Cherish them and Appreciate or Savor them all the more since they're not a 'Given'.   As with any Chronic Illness you learn to just Celebrate the Positive days and downplay the Negative days so that you remain Balanced in your Outlook and retain Hope with as much Positive Energy as you all can muster.




Yes, this day Princess T wasn't on the 'Nice' List and so she was absent from our Good Time on the Town.   But, her day played out best by NOT taking her along... and thus, so did ours!  *Smiles*   Sometimes she's just not up to having a Good Time and when that is Evident she often refuses to have a Good Time with you and needs to just Wallow a bit in her Misery, which is allowed.  Everybody has their Bad Days and hers can indeed be Epic, but she doesn't need Permission to have them... so when they come... we allow it to Play Out until it passes for her... usually quickly if we don't try... and fail... to run damage Control and interference.




We bought her a Starbucks on the way Home so she was Delighted that there were no hard Feelings of her epic Meltdown earlier... all was Forgiven... and we moved on.   She was back in Balance and agreed to even Help me with my Abnormal Tree Decorating if I wanted her to?  Yes, yes I want you to Partner with me on Decorating my Weirdo Tree... we both Laughed heartily.  Because I know she Loves her Weirdo Gramma and Big Brother... even tho' we aren't allegedly NORMAL... which is so over-rated and subjective anyway, dontcha think?  *Winks*




And besides, who freakin' wants a NORMAL Christmas Tree anyway?!?  Whatever that even looks like???!?!??!  I wouldn't even presume to know... and I don't Care... *Winks*




*******

Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian



2 comments:

  1. Where ARE you? If you are anywhere nearby, I'd love to go with you on a venture!

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    Replies
    1. Susan I'm in the Metro Phoenix area and this venue is in Downtown Phoenix, if you have never been it's wonderful! Always happy to meet a Blog Friend in person and have an Adventure! *winks* Dawn... The Bohemian

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