Monday, September 12, 2016

Shirking



Lately I've made a Fine Art out of Shirking... I've been avoiding and neglecting some things, been totally unwilling to do something difficult... on purpose!  *Gasp!*  I know, that's so not like me usually... I'm the one that typically takes duties and responsibilities so dead seriously that I'm driven to fulfill them!  Not lately, I've been Shirking and I know it.  I start out to accomplish something and if I'm meeting with the least bit of resistance or complications, it's a handy excuse to just put it off lately.




Case in point, the walls of my larger Showroom, which I stripped down for a complete overhaul and refreshing of that space.  I bought everything I will need... and then promptly misplaced it... so each day I feel motivated to tackle the Project, I cannot find the supplies.   And it gets put off again, even though in the midst of the Shirking I know I'll have to get around to it eventually... or will I?   I'm not even 100% Sure since Sales have been so soft lately I might even close down one of the spaces... so it would be like redecorating or remodeling a place you're walking away from... so what's the point?




My certainty levels about stuff lately is just 'off'... I feel off my Game entirely in fact.  Since typically I'm very decisive and Gung Ho, but lately I haven't been unthinkingly enthusiastic or eager about very much.  I'm not settled about very many Issues either so I'm not exactly producing definite results.  So a lot of stuff is pending and being Shirked.  Normally that would bother me, but it's not so much right now and I can drift off into doing something more relaxing or pleasurable without a thought as to what I've successfully Shirked another day.




I wouldn't want to make a Habit of this Shirking thing, but I do realize now why so many people do... and believe me when I tell you Shirking has become epidemic, especially in the Modern work place.   Mebbe I'm just trying it out to see how it Feels, except I didn't consciously even make that decision actually, it just sorta happened one day... and then another.  Things I didn't want to have to push myself to do, because lately I'm pushing and that's exerting a lot of energy before you even get around to whatever the push is for!  Physically I'm not 100% so perhaps my reserves to push hard enough are too depleted?




But Shirking I can handle and manage, because I know I'm doing it on purpose, so eventually I shove myself hard enough to propel me forward again and out of Shirking Mode.  I even looked for those misplaced supplies to remodel the Showroom this Morning, only I didn't find them right away and got tired and hot searching so I gave up.  It's not quite the same Rush as the Thrill Of The Hunt... when you're just seeking that which you've lost or misplaced, is it?  In fact I get upset with myself for failing to remember and then even more frustrated when I think I remember and it's not there where I imagined I remembered it could be!  *LOL*  I'll probably stumble across it when I'm a lot less motivated to actually be about doing the Project than I was early this Morning!?!




But how long should you waste valuable time and energy looking for something you can't find, you know?   By the time I find it I'll probably be too tired from searching for it that I won't have the ambition or strength to now propel myself forward enough to do anything with it.  Then I'll put it in a better spot to locate it more easily... and forget where that is too if too much time passes!  This Old Timers facing your limitations thing is very annoying lemme tell ya, it's just better for me to imagine I'm just Shirking rather than not really up to the Job so much anymore?   Shirking doesn't scare me nearly so much as facing a possibility that I just don't have it in me so much anymore to get it all done?!?




And on those days when I'm really feeling my Age it is so easy to fall into Shirk Mode so that just avoiding doing something is a whole lot easier to Roll with than trying to do something and be unable to hang!!!  To be right in the middle... well, Hopefully I get to at least the middle... and then crap out and say I'm done and that's enough Todaying for Today... I gave it my Some, that'll just have to be enough.  *Le Sigh*   Right now I'm actually contemplating whether to give it another shot at locating the missing supplies one last time this Morning?  A little Prayer to St. Anthony the Patron Saint of lost things would be my Mom's best advice, I can almost hear her saying to quit wasting time and do it!  He helped her find a lot of misplaced items... so I could give him a shout-out, couldn't hurt since I certainly can't locate it without somebody's Help!  *Winks*




One Minute Later:  I sent that little Prayer up and I swear to God I immediately got out of this chair and walked right to where the supplies were hiding!   I'm not even Sure I know how that all works?!?  But I always say if it Works, well Work it!!!  So Thanks Mom... and St. Anthony... Mystery solved and they weren't anyplace I remember ever putting them, very obscure placement, so perhaps someone in the Family moved them, I dunno?   Now the dilemma of having no excuse to Shirk the Project, so should I throw myself into it or not?  I'm thinking I probably should, I'll feel better for having done something that has been put off too long already.  Plus, mebbe some hard Work will get me out of the doldrums I've been mired in lately?

*******

Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian


8 comments:

  1. Try for completion before your surgery?

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    1. I'm gathering the supplies to at least begin, probably Today in fact. Tuesdays are not so busy so I should be able to tackle one wall without interruption. Dawn... The Bohemian

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  2. A lot has been going on in your life. It is normal to get tired and out of sorts from time to time. Shirking may be your unconscious mind's sneaky way of getting you to rest a bit. So fun to hear St. Anthony came through for you.

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    1. I agree, my unconscious Mind is taking over, you have to be very sneaky with me to get me to rest. *winks* Dawn... The Bohemian

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  3. Maybe you need a vacation. Getting away does wonders. You come back refreshed and ready to tackle your projects.

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    1. Yes, Bora Bora is still #1 on my Bucket List. The first opportunity we can afford a Vacay I am so down the road heading towards a long overdue respite! Dawn... The Bohemian

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  4. Bora Bora! Well now that sounds like a VACATION!

    I think it's so cool St. Anthony helped you find your misplaced items, but I think maybe the universe was giving you a message that it wasn't all that important that it needed to get done right away. Maybe it's time to let a space go - I know I certainly don't have the energy or stamina to get projects done like I used to, nor do I want to be that busy anymore. I think it's good to take it easier when we get older, and make time for the 'shirking' things - like knitting. lol I'm feeling due for a nice long rest this winter myself. Maybe a little antique shopping in Arizona? ;)

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    1. Well, GF if you do make it out here to Sunny AZ be sure to lemme know so we can hook up and I'll help you paint the Town. winks And yes, it's time to let a Showroom go, the smaller one, I'm already making plans to remodel the larger one and then close out the smaller one to make it more manageable, sales have been so soft lately anyway, people aren't spending the money like they used to on collectibles, vintage or antiques... if it's not necessary folks are just being frugal. Dawn... The Bohemian

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