Tuesday, May 28, 2013

My Own Crime Scene ~ The Accountability Post

After Enjoying a Beautifully Humorous and Brave Post of Transparency at one of my Favorite Blogs THE ADVENTURES OF ELIZABETH about her Crime of Passion... definitely worth Reading if you haven't yet gone over there and need some Levity to your Day... I Wondered if perhaps I should 'Come Clean' too and Reveal my own Crime Scene and do this Accountability Post?  Perhaps it would be Therapeutic I mused... and 'Coming Clean' about SOMETHING, even the not-so-Beautiful Mess here at Bohemian Valhalla would at least mean I have something Clean... if not the house... at least my Conscience?!?  *Winks*  Besides, I like to Keep It Real around here in my slice of Blogovia and perhaps my not-so-Secret Shame is something some of you can relate to also... and there's a measure of Comforting in Cameraderie isn't there?  Yes, BEHOLD... one of the many Piles, Boxes and Milk Crates full of Found Treasures and Works In Progress or Projects here at Bohemian Valhalla!!!  *Cringing*  But I've been Transparent about a lot of other Personal Issues and Stuff... so why not this?  So here we go... a peek into my Nightmare...
Yes, this is what the Crew here have to Live with and navigate around during the Great Edit and Purges in what seems like perpetual process lately... as I'm wading through possessions to either keep, Donate or Purge and preparing Inventory that will be Showroom Bound and flipped.  Culling the Hoard of Lovelies has been an often exhausting Process because Holy Mother of God how did so much amass and accumulate over the years?  Well... really we KNOW HOW... the Thrill Of The Hunt is much more Thrilling than trying to find a place for it all or Store it until it's Sold isn't it?  *Winks*
If you're Truly an Incurable Collector and Scavenger to your Core it's not as if you're gonna give up your Primal Pleasure just because you ran out of space either.   Heaven Forbid... the Urge is too strong and though I have been able to reign myself in by sticking to a 'Pickin' Budget that focuses on Profit, the great Stuff the G-Kid Force and I are finding still needs to be Processed... and Doing The Work takes Time... a LOT of Time!!!   No, I might not be one of those Hoarders of actual Trash that isn't bothered by the mess one iota and can't let go of any of it, but I am most definitely a Human Magpie... a Bowerbird whose Nest often gets Cluttered with what she drags Home.  One that probably won't keep the majority of it once she gets tired of looking at or being overwhelmed by the untidiness and disorganization it Creates in her Creative Process... her Projects... her Pursuits to generate Income from her Passions.  But 'til it goes out the door it's here... in my face... and the Organized Chaos disturbs me, because I'm a Control Freak and OCD so I don't like a messy Home.  See how I've now become 'her'... as if 'she' is a separate person?  *LOL*  
This is the "Haunted Guest Room" where nobody in the Familia wants to go anyway, well... except me, I'm fine with the Room, the Spirits are probably afraid if they piss me off even more Crap will end up stashed there and they won't even have any room to maneuver, I dunno?  *LOL*  So, yes, this room and the Formal Diningroom, where we rarely Formally Dine, are the two least used rooms of the house and therefore end up with most of the Cache of stuff 'In Process'.  This is a Bed... THE Bed and THE Guest Room that my Sis coming from Texas is supposed to be able to occupy when she moves in soon!  *Gasp!*  I've already forwarned her of the carnage in there... she knows me so well it wasn't a surprise Revelation... we'll work on it... and the rest of the Works in Process together... which is Wonderful... she's way cheaper than Therapy!  *Winks*  Plus, she helps me make decisions faster... she's not attached to anything I've squirreled away and she recognizes the Value of it all, so she's gentle yet firm about what Speed we need to move at to get er' done and keep on top of it all!
And so that she won't have to be walking on top of it all!  *LMAO*  Yes, this is the floor of her tiny Guest Room.  Or what used to be the floor 'til I cluttered it up with relatively recent 'Scores' that will soon take the place of the Treasures that will be moving out as soon as I get them Culled, Edited, Purged and Curate what I want to Keep more thoroughly... I've got a long way to go... obviously.
And this barricaded door is the Closet she won't be able to get into to put her Stuff in until I declutter the entrance to it... to undress and flip 'Old Yashyme' as soon as there's room for her in the Showroom.  I actually want to utilize Old Yashyme to display and Model Vintage Clothing and Gypsy Accessories I'm Selling in the Showroom, so I can't wait to make room for her in there.   She doesn't know she's being Sold Off yet... Shhhhhhhh.  *Winks*   You're probably Wondering whats presently IN the Closet aren't you?  I know you are... well, I forgot... but probably at least some Found Treasures that have been Stored long enough now that they'll be Sold Off too... if I haven't seen it in a Minute or it's not exceptionally Sentimental or a Family Heirloom, then I probably don't need to hang onto it... so Closet and Storage Clear-Outs are much easier for me, I'm Relentless with discarding what they hold some kinda way... so long as it's AWAY!  *Winks*  If anything is outta Sight its outta Mind and my Detachment to it is not so bad a Process.
And some of the Projects that have Languished far too long... like Creating from my Stash of Old License Plates... well, that will make Letting Go of some of that Cache easier too... sometimes I just need the Objective Opinion of a Professional Organizer and Clean Freak like my Sis... those are her Strengths and obviously NOT mine!  *LOL*  We're Yin and Yang... I probably won't recognize the place after she's Lived here a mere week... and that's a good thing... she's Excited about the Prospect of going thru my Hoard... she knows I have Good Stuff... just too much of it... so it's Discovery and Dollar Signs, which can be Great Fun if you're not Tackling it Alone.  If you've ever seen how Overjoyed Frank and Mike get on 'American Pickers' when they're Teaming up to 'Pick' thru a Good Honeypot of a Hoard, well, the Sis and I will be the Estro equivalents... 'cause a lot of this Good Stuff actually came with the House or I Inherited, so it hasn't even been 'Picked' yet, it's practically Virgin Territory and I'm not even sure what we'll find?!!
But yes, some of it IS mine and can be Found in the Strangest of Places... Places it obviously doesn't Belong and shouldn't be but had no other Place to be and so it's there... in the way... an eyesore... a source of Shame and Guilt because I really should get to it... but there's not enough hours in the day while you're also Working and Caregiving Full Time.  My Juggling Act can't be perfected much more without more Partipants joining the Act.  So... I can't wait 'til Kathie arrives... I just Pray something doesn't come up between now and then to nix the Plan she and I have put in place?!?     
And yes, there will be some things she may have to Coax me out of... to Help me to Let Go because I don't wanna... yep, there are those things... like this now dismantled Italian Tole Rose Gilded Table, that I WANT to keep because I Love it... but I doubt there will ever be a place for it now that more People keep Moving In.  Gotta make room for the ever expanding Bohemian Valhalla Clan... God first, then People, then Money, then Things... that's my Personal Mantra.  The Priorities cannot shift or things would be out of Order in a very big way.  Though looking at this Image I can't help but think about how out of Order they already are when I've got a Vintage Milk Bottle and Hull Teapot hiding behind the Caged Skirts of a Vintage Dress Form in a Formal Diningroom!!!!   Alongside what is that?  A Victorian Tin Corbel, Tapestries and Vintage Suitcases and Mason Jars?  Absurd, yes, you've definitely fallen down the Rabbit Hole deeply haven't you?!?  *Le Sigh*
I recognize that I have Coped with some Extreme Stress, years of exhausting Caregiving and Personal Loss in some unconventional ways... but I also recognize that I had to do my own form of Intervention about Maintaining Order and Organization more effectively to do all of the things I need and want to do without it becoming backlogged like this...
Or losing Function like this... that is a Diningroom Chair... whose Function is for Seating... not holding a pile of the most recent 'Project' that came out of a Storage Edit and Purge.  Do I even know what is wrapped up so carefully?  No... no I don't... it's now a Mystery... but probably something Good... maybe even Awesome.  I like Chairs to be for sitting, not for holding piles of Work sidelined because there have been too many distractions that I never got around to it yet!
Now... if I lived Alone, getting immersed in a Major Project whose undertaking is ominous and Time consuming wouldn't phase me one bit because I can get a lot of Work done if not Interrupted and left alone to devote all of my Energies, Time and Attention to the Task at hand.  But I don't live Alone and that is so NOT the case... so every Major Project undertaken will have numerous Interruptions, other Obligations and the needs of others thrown in there for good measure.  Therefore, many MAJOR Projects get delayed until I feel that I won't be right in the thick of them before I'm pulled away in a million other directions... leaving even more of a Mess and unfinished business behind in my wake!  *Arghhh!!!*  I have to Consider this before even beginning a necessary Project... especially a large one.
And I have found that like Cats, Children and Men developing Dementia are Intrigued by and feel the need to get into anything you're in the midst of Doing!!!  *Oh no!!!*  They may have completely ignored and been oblivious to your little Piles of Mess patiently awaiting your Attention UNTIL you begin to give 'it' that Attention and bring their Attention to 'it', as if they're seeing it for the first time... and to you being busy with 'it'... and now... there's Competition for that Attention in the form of either them desperately Needing you and your focus all of a sudden... or they're spying stuff that they must now mess with!  The Drama often can and will begin and even escalate as you're preoccupied with your Mission of clearing the Crime Scene.  Trust me, you wont' be proccupied for long... you can't be... they'll make sure of that until you give up on the Task at hand... YET AGAIN!  Yes, I've made the necessary Speeches and Ultimatums about not bugging me whilst I'm busy doing ____________ {whatever... you fill in the blank} and if I do it at 3:00 in the Morning or some other ridiculous hour I might actually get some or most of it done since I'll be the only one awake... well, sometimes. *Le Sigh*
It's kinda like sitting down to Blog or talk on the Phone... the moment you decide it's the right Time... and you have some Precious Free Time to do it... things will come up... usually attached to the People that bring the things that will come up.  *LOL*  It's a vicious cycle actually... and I suppose I could use it as a legit Excuse for why my Home is my own Crime Scene and has looked like somebody came in and ransacked it, looking for something elusive they probably never actually found and finally gave up on and left... but for me the handy Excuses just don't cut it.  Because it BOTHERS ME IMMENSELY that I can't seem to get things done that I need and want to and which bring me torment because they really do bug me.  But which I often fail to have the Energy for after I've done everything else that I need to do or sometimes want to do because there is a more brief window of opportunity attached to THOSE things.
And so... 'til the Reinforcements arrive and I manage to curb my Urges to Discover Great Stuff and Escape in the Thrill Of The Hunt... there will be times when you'll have to wait a Moment while I shift a pile of Beautiful Mess from the Chair you need to sit in... and just put it in another pile for now.  *Winks*  And if we're really Good Friends perhaps my Obsessions and lack of Order and sufficient Organization won't disturb you too much because you'll recognize all the other Issues have to take precedence and be more of a priority than The Stuff and where it needs to go or be for our Home to look like I Envision it one day.  It's a Grandoise Vision... and I'm still Working on it... but I'm still a long ways off... obviously!
Blessings from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

1 comment:

  1. Dawn, you have an amazing stash of beautiful finds, and I am pretty sure all of us who have places to sell these wonderful treasures, go through this same thing. By the way, your showroom is awesome, and a total refection of you. I hope to see you soon!


A life touched by God always ends in touching others. - Erwin McManus

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