Saturday, July 23, 2011

What Makes It "Home"?











My Nanna... Mom's Mom







With the knowledge that my Mom will never be able to return to her Home to live independantly it has made me introspective and challenged to contemplate what makes it "Home"?  What is it that each of us surrounds ourselves with that make it feel and look like "Home"?  I want the space she occupies, where ever it is, to have that quality of "Home" that will make her content, relaxed, at Peace and more comfortable to be there.  A place that when her Guests walk in it feels like Mom's essence and touch is present and therefore now it is her "Home", where they feel it as they visit and she feels it as she resides there.


This Ring of Antique Keys has been around in our Family since before I was born & probably sparked my fascination with Old Keys...

My Brother is presently being equally challenged with making a portion of their Home become Mom's Home too, in Hopes that she can regain enough strength to make the long trip to live with them.  So they're busy moving many of her Treasures and possessions over to California to set it up and when they receive her, she will instantly feel at "Home" again.  Her vast Wedgwood collection and Bohemian Bling has already made the trek Westward.

I'm still taking care of Mom's Apartment until the transitions are complete... and before everything is removed I wanted to photograph some of what is left to give me a visual of what makes it Mom's "Home".   It feels very strange and unnatural walking in without her presence... her essence is still very much evident, but it makes me emotional and feels eerie knowing that she will never go back there, to the Home she has resided in for so many years and was Hopeful she could return to if she got well enough.  It feels suspended in time in fact, to that day on July 6th when the crisis with her health unfolded... there is still evidence and disarray of the Paramadic intervention... of the last things she and my Brother did the Night before they went to bed.  That Night before had been her Birthday in fact, a day filled with much activity, fun and special memories and they had retired quite late and so hadn't bothered to tidy up as much as usual.  Mom is a stickler for tidy, she is the Queen Of Clean and made a fine Art of having an amazingly Beautiful, exotic, fragrant, organized and spotlessly clean Home... regardless of age, mobility and health challenges... if anyone could have had excuses for letting things go she should have & could have, but she never did... NEVER! 


She would in fact be horrified to see the dust that has collected in her long absence... but I can't bring myself to bother, there seems no point and so many other things to do that are a priority... and so, even with some mere dust and a few things out of place, it just no longer feels right because Mom would never have that! *LOL*


Showing off the Treasures Great-Nanna spoiled them with this day... *Smiles*







Showing off some of the Origami Treasures the Great-Grandkids made for Nanna... they are both budding Origami Masters... this Heart is actually 3-Dimensional and can hold Candies!!!

And so as I'm bringing some of what makes it "Home" to her over at the Nursing Home and we're foofing her new space to give it her particular Signature and Style its slowly evolving and I see her comfort level increasing and her anxiety and agitation diminishing.  The presence of Loved Ones is of coarse the most important aspect of "Home", but we also need to feel a belonging and connection to the actual Space don't we?  It reminded me that there are many aspects that make our individual Spaces a "Home"... what makes it "Home" for YOU my Friends? 

Dawn... The Bohemian

6 comments:

  1. I am so sorry to hear about your mother. That has to be difficult beyond words to deal with. I pray that she makes her transition easily and that everyone involved can be strong enough to handle it.

    It is such a powerful meditation contemplating what makes a home. I follow Yoko Ono on twitter and she talks about rooms a lot... She recently said this, "Imagine what would happen to your room when you move away. Imagine if there is anything in the room you could take with you when you die." and this "Unclog your mind. Unclog your room. Arrange your room in a way you wish your mind would be."

    I thought it was so fascinating. I always look in my apartment or room and ask myself, "Can I see my soul here?" I think thats what makes it a home... being able to see, feel, and experience someones essence. Everything has a purpose... whether it be functional or aesthetic... its there because it represents you. Nothing is meaningless... or at least it shouldnt me.

    Good luck to you and yours... and I love your pictures! Especially the religious statues. Mary is one of my many muses. I have a huge statue of her in my herb garden and my mother and I love to go outside at night and light candles there and just watch the moon.

    Shaheen

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  2. Books, comfortable chairs, lamps... Oh, don't forget the dust! Whether I dust once a day or week or month, there always seems to be dust. I've never figured out other peoples' secret to dust-free environments.

    I can't get past how much you look like your mother! It may be one of the closest resemblances (is that a word?) I've ever seen!

    What a thoughtful thing you are doing for your mother. It must be VERY difficult making these decisions.

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  3. God love you my friend and all you and your brother are doing for your mother. Yes, you sure do look like your mother.
    We had to do the same thing for my mother, I took care of her for six years and then when my health would no longer allow that, my oldest brother and his wife took her to live with them..where she lived until her death..she had her own room and as many of her OWN things that could fit in it..so she seemed content.
    My home to me means my sweet husband..and all the things that we have collected together over the many years of "hunting" and trying to make our home distinctly "ours".
    Does not look anything like my children's homes...as it should be... they have their own style.
    I LOVE the look of my home it's exterior and INTERIOR and the "feel" of the things I have around me..it makes me happy.
    I remember one time... years ago my 7 year old grandaughter said to me,... when I came to vist them...from Indiana... (and was hugging her) she smiled and said "you smell like your house Grandma". She had not been in my house for 2 years at that time. I was amazed she would remember "the essence" of my home .
    She would often comment on things she would see at Antique Shoppes... when I was visiting...adn took her antiquing with me...."this looks like the ( sure and such) in your house Grandma".
    I was trying to teach her to be an "antiquer" from early on. She has since forgotten those lessons, but she will come back to them one day...I am thinking in her home.
    Rose

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  4. I so love your blue rose china!!
    Your children are so cute! It looks like they are enjoying nanas visit!

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  5. Lovely family! And a lovely home you have. Enjoy the gorgeous week ahead, Kellie xx

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  6. I hope your mom is adjusting. It is so hard when they don't. It was just a year ago i was home. Mom was fine but, i had noticed small things were "OFF" and she was out of her routine. She was always VERY ROUTINE. a week later she fell and broke her hip. She went down hill fast. Now she is residing very comfortably in a memory care assisted living. We are all keeping our fingers crossed that she'll be able to stay there for awhile. Your mom has alot of nice treasures.What was kind of strange for all of us was taking things down to the goodwill and the trash man. I know a lot of friends going thru this. It's not an easy task.

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