Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Decisions... Decisions... Decisions


The Post today will have absolutely nothing to do with the images... so if  you just want to look at pretty pictures I suggest you ignore the text completely... because my stress levels are rather high whilst writing it... BTW is whilst even a word? *winks*

However, if you enjoy a good dramatic Story, well... read on my Friends... *LOL* 


I HATE making important decisions under pressure and tight deadlines... even though in my Corporate Life I had to do it all the time and got quite adept at it... I've found it never gets easier no matter how much 'experience' with it you might have under your belt and on your resume...


My Bro' is already back in Cali and The Man will take about a week to get Home from Alaska so I knew that the primary important decision making process regarding Mom and dealing with it all would be all mine, but I had hoped for sufficient lead time to make less rushed ones...


Well, perhaps in a Perfect World, right? *Le Sigh*


On a positive Note she was finally moved out of ICU and into a regular room at the Hospital Tuesday Morn... but before 10:00 AM I had already gotten "The Call" from the Doc that they intended to release her to a "Skilled Nursing Care Facility" by Wednesday Morn... WHAT!!!!!!!!!!????????? 


So, here's me in hyper drive as my feet hit the floor that fateful Tuesday Morning... which is in fact TODAY, I just write my Posts for the next day late the Night before... *Winks*


Frantically Touring Facilities close to our Home and making a much too pressing decision about which one, while APPEARING cool, calm & collected... after all, you don't want them thinking the 'Crazed Daughter' is making the decisions *winks* ... and getting the shocking $$$$$$$$ involved that I Pray her Insurances cover at least the bulk of... because guess what, the Bro and I aren't in any financial position to cover ANY of it... but you have to allow that not to visibly externally phase your countenance either, though your stomach is in knots!!!  I needed to win an Oscar for THAT performance lemme tell  ya... but Nursing Home Care anywhere, well, its more than 99.9% of what people earn anyway so probably nobody can really afford it... so it is one of those more daunting of Life's issues to confront...
  

Yeah, we all had stellar careers in our day... but the Bro's been battling serious illness a very long time and hasn't worked in years... and we've broken the Bank over the years with health care costs relating to the Loved Ones in our immediate Family, and inheriting two special needs G-Kids to raise in our ole' age... all of which forced Yours Truly into taking early Retirement and The Man into forced Medical Retirement from his career... so it is what it is... hard knocks Life... deal with it...


I knew what I was working with and it wasn't much my Friends... so, how charming and effective could I be for Dear Ole' Mom's sake... what could I negotiate?  After all I've found you rarely get what you deserve... you get what you negotiate...


We'd already had Social Workers involved that I knew would NEVER approve our Home to release her to since we're lacking too much to adequately care for her...  and for now they will not release her to my Bro' to take back to live with him in Cali either... not well enough for the trip and he'll have to be 'inspected' for suitability...
  

So its a lot more complicated than the Bro ever imagined it would be... though I've been down this road before with Dear Ole' Dad before his passing... and even with The Man on occassion when he required more skilled care than I could give him at Home... and when taking Guardianship of the Beloved G-Kids when placement was necessary after their birth...


So with Starbucks fueling me onwards I did the Marathon Place-A-Thon arrangements and negotiations... with less than 6 hours to finalize it all... actually less than 2 hours in reality since the Caseworkers already wanted answers or they'd make the decisions for us...


You don't want that... since their placement was already looking like it would be clear across the Valley where regular visits, scrutiny and Family encouragement would be severely limited by transportation and distance factors...


And I'm of the ilk that if you're planning on taking "possession" of one of my Loved Ones then I'm setting some reasonable conditions of my own... or die trying...
I'm tenacious like that...


But I'm also a nice person, or at least I like to think that I am *winks* and so when I have to deal with Agencies I really do try not to be their worst nightmare either as they do their job...
I have empathy that there are dirty jobs and some of us have had to do them...
I've had more than my fair share of dirty jobs where I had to make unpopular decisions and deal with folks going through difficult situations... so I've seen it from both angles...


And then after getting Nursing Home, Hospital and Caseworker in agreement with my decision and 'Game Plan'...
There was the much more difficult job of preparing Mom for what would be an unpopular transition and the extended "Game Plan".  And getting her on Board with the least resistance so that she would transition well and concentrate on rehabilitation sufficient to eventually and Hopefully get her well enough for a potential placement at the Bro' & Family's Home in the future... whenever that will be...
God be Willing and the creek don't rise...


And then the even more difficult decision of telling the two G-Kids that they MUST behave and remain with gracious extended Family and Friends just a little while longer so Gramma can continue to Minister to and situate their Great-Nanna... *Hear the sound of tearful pleading little voices and the weary voices of extended Family & Salt Of The Earth Friends who are earning their Sainthood as we speak!  Smiles*
  And I'm thankful I have this Land Of Blog Space to release my Story to... so much cheaper than Therapy!!! *Winks*


But I do so HATE making important decisions under pressure and deadlines...
And most especially when it involves the Lives of other people...
So I'm very thankful I have the Lord in my corner and as my Primary Advisor & Source...
And I firmly believe that it will be okay in the end... and if its not okay, its not the end.

Dawn... The Bohemian

Join us for Pearls & Lace Thursday at Doni's FAITH GRACE & CRAFTS Blog

4 comments:

  1. I know how scary that can be Dawn. I was gritting my teeth when my mom got ill. I'm so thankful that she was able to recover enough to continue to live in her own house but it was a close call. No matter how well you think you're prepared for something like this ..it never seems to be enough....But on the very bright side I'm so happy to hear that your mom was cleared to leave the hospital. Hospitals are dangerous, and one really shouldn't spend any more time in them than necessary jmho. Still praying hard for all of you. Vanna

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  2. It sounds like you did a great job with the short time.

    My mom went to rehab and we were lucky that the one her insurance would pay for turned out to be a good one. She liked the people there and did well and is back home.

    Good luck to your momma, I hope things work out well for her.

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  3. I fully believe that if you do what you need to do, then you put GOD in place to do what He needs to do. It sounds to me that with a full understanding of what you alone had to do, the decisions you would be required to make and the repercussions of all those actions, you did exactly what needed doing. It was complicated, a struggle and overwhelming, but you gathered up your skirts and did the work anyway..without ego. You have indeed put GOD in a great position to do what he has to do now! For that you should feel really satisfied!

    Blessings to you and your Momma!

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  4. Hello Dawn. Wow what a day. I really feel sorry for all those people who don't have a loved one to make decisions for them. It appears as if you made the best decision for your mom and I hope all goes well with her transition. I will be praying that all goes smoothly. Thank you for sharing your post today with me for Pearls and Lace Thursday. Blessings, Doni

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A life touched by God always ends in touching others. - Erwin McManus

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars. - Og Mandino (1923-1996)

For creativity to flourish one should try to look at everything as though it were being seen for the first or the last time. - Quote from "A Thousand Paths To Creativity" by David Baird

Is what I'm about to say an improvement on silence? ~ Galen Pearl